He could have married another woman if you let him know during courtship that sex is optional. He was the victim first!

If you're not ready to fulfill your conjugal duties, don't marry. If you want children,
who says you can't be a single mother? Do not lead people to temptation by denying them their conjugal right and causing different reactions

safarigirl:


First victim of what?

If you ask me for my biro and I refuse to give you, does that make you a victim? Does that give you the right to slap me and collect the biro?

There is no part of the world you will go to that refusal for sex is a crime, none. But there are many parts of the world that spousal rape is a crime.

You do not have to debase yourself to animalistic ways because something is not going your way. If resorting to violence is the only way you think someone can get something, then there is something severely wrong with your upbringing

socialmediaman:


Jeeeeeez! Dang! That woman is someone’s daughter

And is the man not someone's son?
Take ya time ooo

Kingcalls:


Shut up 4kin simp....u will end up like ur fellow simps ,a life full of regrets... na fools like u go talk say a man should not hit a woman even if she hits u.... mumu men ....u are nothing but a half boy, half woman....man no dey ur DNA

Chia��

DMerciful:
He could have married another woman if you let him know during courtship that sex is optional. He was the victim first!

If you're not ready to fulfill your conjugal duties, don't marry. If you want children,
who says you can't be a single mother? Do not lead people to temptation by denying them their conjugal right and causing different reactions

LOL

Are you a child?

There are times when sex will not be on the table, there are times when sex will be an option. If your wife is pregnant, there are periods she will medically be unable to have sex

If she has postpartum, she may not want to have sex. There are times when people are too weak and mentally stressed for sex, both men and women. When some men are having issues at work, they may not want to have sex.

Marriage is for many many years, decades, and even a nymphomaniac will one day, not be in the mood for sex, so, what is this childish talk about marrying someone else?

Some of you just come here to talk like kids. Your idea of marriage is laughable.

Bouncing2:

Which someone's daughter!?
Look at the way our man was and is still SIMPING after her!!,,,, ain't you seeing that?

Can you just imagine how much suffering we are facing with all this yeye forieng ideas wey oyinbo man bring enter our society
Our fathers didn't have to go through such stress ooo.

My late grandma Jenet was educated and almost richer than my Giant Grandpa Izu.
But I can't imagine him go through such mental and physical stress,asin how watin wan cause am�
Oyinbo man don spoil our women finish ooo
chia who will save our daughters from oyinbo man oooo��

ibechris:
Both of are u wrong and you messed up the whole situation but in fact,u didn't marry a good wife but a pretender if I may say.

Submissiveness is the hall mark of a descent woman.

There is simply no submissiveness in that woman. How do u justify her hoarding sex in marriage, in a weddedhome?. Her action could have made u to commit adultery which is still possible if the situation doesn't change.

Both of you need to talk extensively and if it worths involving her family,u had better do it fast before it goes out of hand.

Wishing u the best as u put situation under control.

God bless you bro or sis, the woman caused her problem and if I were the man, upon pleading with her, I'll let her be and arrange for a second wife or a mistress.

Can't you see how insulting you are? Did I insult you when I mentioned you?

If she has issues bothering her, can't she communicate? Again, if she's not ready for marriage, it's not a must to marry. Marriage comes with responsibilities

safarigirl:


LOL

Are you a child?

There are times when sex will not be on the table, there are times when sex will be an option. If your wife is pregnant, there are periods she will medically be unable to have sex

If she has postpartum, she may not want to have sex. There are times when people are too weak and mentally stressed for sex, both men and women. When some men are having issues at work, they may not want to have sex.

Marriage is for many many years, decades, and even a nymphomaniac will one day, not be in the mood for sex, so, what is this childish talk about marrying someone else?

Some of you just come here to talk like kids. Your idea of marriage is laughable.

ablejesus26:


Can you just imagine how much suffering we are facing with all this yeye forieng ideas wey oyinbo man bring enter our society
Our fathers didn't have to go through such stress ooo.

My late grandma Jenet was educated and almost richer than my Giant Grandpa Izu.
But I can't imagine him go through such mental and physical stress,asin how watin wan cause am�
Oyinbo man don spoil our women finish ooo
chia who will save our daughters from oyinbo man oooo��

Thank you very much!!.
Imagine SIMPING just to claim my supposed conjugal right .
The fact she's richer or older than the man doesn't mean,,,,,she must bow, that's our rightful tradion.

Feminism is cool and beautiful,, but mek pesin no carry am near me

How can you say you love your wife and forced your way through...there's no justification to that and if ur wife was a victim of rape before u met her then u need to do too much to ease her up. If u were you. I would beg her on my knees I will lie down even and cry if I have to. Doing this doesn't mean I'm weak shows that I'm willing to do anything to save the marriage cos if she still refuses after a month or 2. Side chick or second wife straight. E no get how e want be

Ecne:


She probably must have had sex with some other Dude and felt withdrawn from her hubby, for a while... happens a lot these days.
Very soon, wives will start sleeping around with their full chest.

@OP, just divorce that babe for your peace of mind, she's done with you. Just pray she doesn't raise up a rape case against you.
You can leave your daughter with her, and visit her whenever you like.

Very simple

domnwan:
God bless you bro or sis, the woman caused her problem and if I were the man, upon pleading with her, I'll let her be and arrange for a second wife or a mistress.

Hahahha. U are sooo funny honestly.

Mom007:

My dear, free will is the enemy. If you want the free will to do as you please, then please remain single. Do not marry and start looking for free will. Marriage is a bond(age)! It binds you to your spouse and children! You put them ahead of yourself 90% of the time else the marriage will not work! If you are not ready to do this, pls REMAIN SINGLE!

Free will is not the enemy, why didn't God take that from us?
You are in no place to urge me to do what I may or may not be willing to do and marriage isn't a bond(age) maybe for you but not for me and never should anybody put others above themselves if it will result to their own detriment it is not selfishness but human survival instinct 101.

Free will is not selfishness just because my outlook or view about marriage is different from yours.
Your advice was unrealistic and that marriage has already broken no need for a long sermon on pretence.

The wife needs a therapist and all the help she needs from her rapist husband.

No woman denies her husband for no reason, the most obvious, recurring reason is: SOMETHING is taking care of her aside, which is unspeakable, hence the silence.

DMerciful:
Can't you see how insulting you are? Did I insult you when I mentioned you?

If she has issues bothering her, can't she communicate? Again, if she's not ready for marriage, it's not a must to marry. Marriage comes with responsibilities

At no point did I insult you

I said you sound like a child. That is a statement of FACT. I said your idea of marriage is laughable, that is ALSO a statement of fact.

You are clearly an emotional person, that is why you have assumed you were insulted. When you are ready to talk like an adult and bring up arguments that can come from an adult, I will address you as an adult.

Until then, stay away from marriage. It really is not a must to marry and marriage is not for children.

i926:

It normal for most women to stop or even hate sex, after the get married.

It's not normal o, that woman doesn't love the man, period, she is very guilty in this scenario driving her husband over the edge with lack of sex, I pity the op a lot because it's like the wife can't stand him at all refusing sex for weeks, he must really irritate her, I'm a woman so I understand the feeling, if a woman cant stay the touch of a man there is nothing the man will do right, maybe he smells bad or there is no longer chemistry between them on the wife side, it's better to divorce her than abuse her anyway, everyone deserves true love and care.

Hmmmmmmm

This thread sha

[quote author=Ladyhippolyta88 post=109311908]
Free will is not the enemy, why didn't God take that from us?
You are in no place to urge me to do what I may or may not be willing to do and marriage isn't a bond(age) maybe for you but not for me and never should anybody put others above themselves if it will result to their own detriment it is not selfishness but human survival instinct 101.

You clearly don't know much about God. God didn't give us free will. God created man in a perfect state for obedience to His every instruction. Sin gave us free will. Eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and bad gave us free will. We now like to decide for ourselves to do or not to do things and that has drawn us farther and farther away from God. See the result in the world in general. Who am I to tell you what to do? Am I your creator? The things He said not to do sef are the things we humans take pleasure in doing and claiming free will! If you will not listen to God, is it me you will listen to? But don't flaunt Gods rules about life and marriage then when things go bad you run to social media and play the victim. If you are not ready to submit in marriage, do not marry! God is not a feminist.

Is not good as you rape her seek the face of God for forgiveness
Most of this woman can push someone to misbehave such a thing want to happen when I called my wife the first time she declined same thing second time third time when I want to call her again I determine she will decline since 3 months I'm just looking at her

hashtagged:


Your father idiot, if Mohammed rapes his wives don't bring that culture here

How old are you? Unable to argue sensibly? Ode.

Not bragging I'm a good judge of xter but I think your just a victim of what would have busted out differently have u had a little patience. As a sentier, I've already sensed that the period of denial is longer than what you said and it cause you feel guilty.

Sorry, not a prophet of doom but your wife have long left you like God left Nigeria..
She has her reasons though and I see a very long and painful outcome.

[quote author=Mom007 post=109312328][/quote]

I can not keep up with the argument because I don't like religious arguments.
I am not a submissive person and never will be and I don't care if the Christian God is a feminist I have the free will to become one and yes I am a feminist

I see that you're pretty rude and insultive,
no wonder you support the woman wholeheartedly. I won't respond to you any further. Have a nice day!

safarigirl:


At no point did I insult you

I said you sound like a child. That is a statement of FACT. I said your idea of marriage is laughable, that is ALSO a statement of fact.

You are clearly an emotional person, that is why you have assumed you were insulted. When you are ready to talk like an adult and bring up arguments that can come from an adult, I will address you as an adult.

Until then, stay away from marriage. It really is not a must to marry and marriage is not for children.

ibechris:



U can as well visit their house to make peace.

I only commented based on what I read and gave my point,but if u think u are the best adviser,nothing stops u from doing the needful.
Since u are stupid not to mind the kind of words to use.

That’s the challenge with Nairaland where you have reckless and irresponsible youths like you who choose to be abusive. People like you put decent people off this platform. If the word “myopic” is rude, then I wonder if you passed elementary English.

I know you are still a very little boy, single and with no experience of how marriages work. What you have no idea about, simple shut your mouth and let those who are knowledgeable teach you.

Guys need to start practising polygamy. If gay rights can be forced on us,why not polygamy?

Monogamy in today's modern society favours women more and this is the result.Women will become your Lord and as their slaves they use sex as a reward and weapon .


Waiting for the foolish simp that will quote me. If its a woman,I will understand.

Why will a woman deny her husband sex for long

You don’t have to rape her you punish her by going outside to have sex

She will beg you for it when she is ready

Person wey you suppose to turn to dead person in your mind because of s*x you simp and offend her now she will have more power over you.

You Committed two punishable crimes (rape and violence), as well as the social consequences associated with it. You messed up big time man. A very bad move. To avenge something that isn't legally punishable (eg sexual starvation), you don't commit a punishable crime (rape and violence).

You avenge by boycotting her affairs, stop eating her food, introduce a new wife to break her sexual monopoly, and let her divorce you herself. Just be indifferent to her. You see, this is better than rape and violence. You'll punish her better that way, and she will know that she caused it herself. No police can arrest you this way unlike rape and violence.

You could have just signed off in your mind about sex with her, and explore other ways of satisfying yourself. Of course this is under the assumption that you're not responsible for her behaviour. There is a rule that I abide by, and it is that " I won't keep up with my own obligations if the other signatory does not keep up with theirs".

You wanna stop having sex with me as a punishment? Okay, good. Just know that I've boycotted your honeypot permanently. Don't be someone that a woman will dangle sex like a carrot, and you'll be starved. You can't say "I love you" to me, while keeping me hor.nyy. That's fake. I probably will not have sex with her again.

ablejesus26:


Well that's how you choose to handle this jezebelic too of malnupulating men with sex.
But to some of us who do not derive pleasure in cheating,if she refuse to give you with no explanation or reasoning,take it.
There is nothing like rape there.

@ur second statement, do u mean there is nothing like rape in this saga??

U must have done what the op did if it was u

A man who cannot control himself has no business marrying.
Self control is what makes a man.
@op, you raped your wife and that is criminal. Everything goes in that lawless jungle called Nigeria.
In a lawful society, you will be behind bars and be a registered sex offender for a very long time.

flakkybakky:
50% bawo , y deceiving d op, it has drastically reduced to 1%.i just can't imagine my husband doing such to me, there are several ways of luring a woman to bed, but this one that she's not talking u definitely don't know her Mind nd where to come in. One whole month without sex for a man is hell, she will come around with time just keep begging

LOL... depends on their old relationship and love they shared now op fučk up Sha... Raping a woman will make her detest you x1000.... There are tons of way to put her in the mood

It sounds like u had pre existing issues already that warrant that slap and rape,so I would say that aspect of rape is ur fault.
On the issue of denying u sex ehn.
If it ever comes up in my marriage,I would simply walk away and get in touch with another woman for sex.
Life no hard,na we dey make am complex

Noah9:
Good morning nairalanders. Pls I'll go straight to point.

My wife and I have been married for 3 years, God has blessed our matrimony with a beautiful daughter. My wife is so decent, caring and beautiful inside out. I have been a great husband and father to my pretty daughter. I have never cheated on my wife since we got married.

Recently, she barely give me sex. Infact it would take a whole month before I could see Just the color of her undies and I wasn't happy about it.

Last week Wednesday, I committed an unspeakable abuse, I'm so ashamed of myself. I Raped my wife and I hate myself since that incident.

Honestly, I don't know what came over me that particular day, I tried to make advances towards her, she refused and she pushed my hand away. Out of anger I slapped her on her face (she bled from her mouth), I overpowered her and forcefully had my way through. She cried all through that night.

I regretted my actions, I feel remorse, I hate my Life . I have begged her seriously to forgive me but she haven't said a word to me for over 5 days now. She cook for just herself and my daughter, she no longer sleep in our matrimonial bed, she would rather sleep in my daughter's room or the visitor's room, she no longer greets me anymore.

I have never abused, beat or raised my hands on my wife or any woman before. Last week was my first time I did such an abominable act in my Life . What If any one notice we're having issues now, how will I explain to them what actually happened?

I don't even want my little daughter to know we're having issues. I don't know who to talk to. It's a faceless forum that's why I'm sharing my pain here . Pls how do I restore back happiness in my home, I need my wife to forgive me. I'm truly sorry from the depth of my heart and I promise it will never happen again.

Please Help Me.

If you promise to repent and maturely work out your couple issues which includes 'sex allowance', give me her number I will talk sense Into her in your behalf. But no just fall my hand afterwards.