₦airaland Forum

Comedian2019:
Thank God I have left Lagos. Wereys everywhere.
I once asked one innocent looking young man where a particular junction is (not knowing I was at the junction already). He told me to go ahead, that I will pass two more junctions, that the third one is the junction.
To reconfirm, I asked a woman selling paraga how far is that junction from where I was, she then told me I was already there, that the bus I would take to Agege is just across the street.
I then discovered that the innocent looking man is far from innocent.

Ishilove:
I opted to post this in the Health section because I realised, for the first time in all my years in Lagos (and that is my entire life) that many are mad in Lagos but few are are confined in asylums. We don't take mental health seriously enough in Nigeria.

I had left office around 5.30 pm and had not gone far when a junior colleague called me that he had left his entire earthly possessions back in the office, vis his house keys, wallet and phone and the admin office was closed. His excuse was he did not know I would be leaving early. After blasting him for his lackadaisical attitude, I told him where to meet me to get my keys. I was already in transit and the traffic was rapidly moving and If he hurried he would meet me at the traffic light before it turned green.

He drove halfway and had to run the remaining half because of the traffic. He was just about 45 seconds away from me and I could see his approaching form, but the lights had changed to green and we were about moving, so I quickly tossed the bunch of keys on a horizontal signboard on the road median. The dude got to me just as we were about to cross and I yelled at him to go back and check the board. He nodded and ran back.

To my chagrin and ongoing bafflement, he called me back that there were no keys on the board. I told him to check properly, on the sides and even under the board. He rang off, and then called back some minutes later, insisting that he couldn't find any keys. I was forced to alight half way and go back to the junction where all these drama was unfolding. I thought my eyes were paining me when I checked and discovered that the bunch of keys had grown legs and run off in the 45 seconds/ 1 minute it took for my colleague to reach the point where I had tossed the keys.

That is how me and this boy started rigmaroling the road median like construction workers, searching through dirt and grass for my large, shiny bunch of keys that had mysteriously disappeared in plain sight. After about 30 minutes of fruitlessly searching even in portions of the median that I knew I had passed before that fateful toss, we were forced to give up after admitting to ourselves that a Lagosian had seen me tossing the keys and immediately pounced on them like the lunatic he was.

Kai, it is still paining my spirit, soul and body.

My question now is this: what is anyone going to do with a bunch of keys that is totally useless to him? What?

There is a legion of lunatics roaming freely on this streets of the Gidi.

Mom007:
Excuse me. So you could park your car and walk back after the guy called you to say he couldn't find the keys but you couldn't park your car to hand him the keys like one would do to a fellow human being instead of throwing it on the floor for him to pick as if he was a sub human! The time you didn't want to waste showing simple courtesy and dignifying your fellow man, did you not waste that and more looking for the key and trying to gain entrance into your locked office? Na waa o. What did you say is the topic of this your thread again?

Mom007:
Excuse me. So you could park your car and walk back after the guy called you to say he couldn't find the keys but you couldn't park your car to hand him the keys like one would do to a fellow human being instead of throwing it on the floor for him to pick as if he was a sub human! The time you didn't want to waste showing simple courtesy and dignifying your fellow man, did you not waste that and more looking for the key and trying to gain entrance into your locked office? Na waa o. What did you say is the topic of this your thread again?

Ishilove:
I opted to post this in the Health section because I realised, for the first time in all my years in Lagos (and that is my entire life) that many are mad in Lagos but few are are confined in asylums. We don't take mental health seriously enough in Nigeria.

I had left office around 5.30 pm and had not gone far when a junior colleague called me that he had left his entire earthly possessions back in the office, vis his house keys, wallet and phone and the admin office was closed. His excuse was he did not know I would be leaving early. After blasting him for his lackadaisical attitude, I told him where to meet me to get my keys. I was already in transit and the traffic was rapidly moving and If he hurried he would meet me at the traffic light before it turned green.

He drove halfway and had to run the remaining half because of the traffic. He was just about 45 seconds away from me and I could see his approaching form, but the lights had changed to green and we were about moving, so I quickly tossed the bunch of keys on a horizontal signboard on the road median. The dude got to me just as we were about to cross and I yelled at him to go back and check the board. He nodded and ran back.

To my chagrin and ongoing bafflement, he called me back that there were no keys on the board. I told him to check properly, on the sides and even under the board. He rang off, and then called back some minutes later, insisting that he couldn't find any keys. I was forced to alight half way and go back to the junction where all these drama was unfolding. I thought my eyes were paining me when I checked and discovered that the bunch of keys had grown legs and run off in the 45 seconds/ 1 minute it took for my colleague to reach the point where I had tossed the keys.

That is how me and this boy started rigmaroling the road median like construction workers, searching through dirt and grass for my large, shiny bunch of keys that had mysteriously disappeared in plain sight. After about 30 minutes of fruitlessly searching even in portions of the median that I knew I had passed before that fateful toss, we were forced to give up after admitting to ourselves that a Lagosian had seen me tossing the keys and immediately pounced on them like the lunatic he was.

Kai, it is still paining my spirit, soul and body.

My question now is this: what is anyone going to do with a bunch of keys that is totally useless to him? What?

There is a legion of lunatics roaming freely on this streets of the Gidi.

emaskocoded:
Pls is it the soft copy you have, I've been trying to download it but can't find it

thelegend1:
Karma was served in real-time. He now came here to rant and garner public validation/sympathy.

Ishilove:
I opted to post this in the Health section because I realised, for the first time in all my years in Lagos (and that is my entire life) that many are mad in Lagos but few are are confined in asylums...

Felimax:
Lagos and the funny stories and mad experience. Thank God I am no longer there. Port Harcourt is better at least with better pay also.
We were inside a bus at Alen junction about to leave for Iyana-ipaja when we started looking for the owner of a big traveling bag who we suspected is also a passenger in the bus, for almost 10 mins nobody could lay claim to the bag, so we decided to give it out or just leave it by the bus stop there that was when this man screamed that he is the owner of the bag.
All the while we were looking for the owner he has been with us but his mind very far away. I felt it.

Mom007:
Excuse me. So you could park your car and walk back after the guy called you to say he couldn't find the keys but you couldn't park your car to hand him the keys like one would do to a fellow human being instead of throwing it on the floor for him to pick as if he was a sub human! The time you didn't want to waste showing simple courtesy and dignifying your fellow man, did you not waste that and more looking for the key and trying to gain entrance into your locked office? Na waa o. What did you say is the topic of this your thread again?

Ten06:
The day I gave up on lagos was when I boarded a bus going to ikontu, on the way a guy blocked our bus and started fighting with the driver. Being a good Samaritan I jumped down and helped the driver to tackle the guy until he ran away, all the while the conductor was just around us doing nothing to support the fight.
After the guy has gone I discovered that my phone has been stolen.

CalabarPikin:
Iron condemn
Try check here, it could be there probably

Focusmind:
Typical of Nigeria corporate bosses. Arrogant and always disrespectful towards their junior colleagues. She should have waited for him to politely hand over the keys to him. Throwing something to someone is demeaning and you could only do that to someone you don't respect or value.
Op need to work on her on mental state as her state of mind wasn't in order based on how she acted

Felimax:
Lagos and the funny stories and mad experience. Thank God I am no longer there. Port Harcourt is better at least with better pay also.
We were inside a bus at Alen junction about to leave for Iyana-ipaja when we started looking for the owner of a big traveling bag who we suspected is also a passenger in the bus, for almost 10 mins nobody could lay claim to the bag, so we decided to give it out or just leave it by the bus stop there that was when this man screamed that he is the owner of the bag.
All the while we were looking for the owner he has been with us but his mind very far away. I felt it.

ShaqFu:
Nope, it's not lunacy, it is wickedness. I'm very sure the person who took it saw you throw it to that guy and this was his or her way of showing you their true colours.

thelegend1:
I will suggest you evaluate your mental health before labeling others lunatics. You couldn't spare 5 mins to park by the road and give your colleague the Keys in hand, and was eventually delayed for over 30 minutes. Yet you came here to rant and blame someone else.
I'm very sure you would've waited and even bought gala and coke (to offer the person) if it was your boss or senior colleague.

Are you related to or mentored by Buhari? Quit with your double standards.

Take responsibility for once as an adult!

Ishilove:
I opted to post this in the Health section because I realised, for the first time in all my years in Lagos (and that is my entire life) that many are mad in Lagos but few are are confined in asylums. We don't take mental health seriously enough in Nigeria.

I had left office around 5.30 pm and had not gone far when a junior colleague called me that he had left his entire earthly possessions back in the office, vis his house keys, wallet and phone and the admin office was closed. His excuse was he did not know I would be leaving early. After blasting him for his lackadaisical attitude, I told him where to meet me to get my keys. I was already in transit and the traffic was rapidly moving and If he hurried he would meet me at the traffic light before it turned green.

He drove halfway and had to run the remaining half because of the traffic. He was just about 45 seconds away from me and I could see his approaching form, but the lights had changed to green and we were about moving, so I quickly tossed the bunch of keys on a horizontal signboard on the road median. The dude got to me just as we were about to cross and I yelled at him to go back and check the board. He nodded and ran back.

To my chagrin and ongoing bafflement, he called me back that there were no keys on the board. I told him to check properly, on the sides and even under the board. He rang off, and then called back some minutes later, insisting that he couldn't find any keys. I was forced to alight half way and go back to the junction where all these drama was unfolding. I thought my eyes were paining me when I checked and discovered that the bunch of keys had grown legs and run off in the 45 seconds/ 1 minute it took for my colleague to reach the point where I had tossed the keys.

That is how me and this boy started rigmaroling the road median like construction workers, searching through dirt and grass for my large, shiny bunch of keys that had mysteriously disappeared in plain sight. After about 30 minutes of fruitlessly searching even in portions of the median that I knew I had passed before that fateful toss, we were forced to give up after admitting to ourselves that a Lagosian had seen me tossing the keys and immediately pounced on them like the lunatic he was.

Kai, it is still paining my spirit, soul and body.

My question now is this: what is anyone going to do with a bunch of keys that is totally useless to him? What?

There is a legion of lunatics roaming freely on this streets of the Gidi.

iamyemiakins:
Someone prolly De Gea'd the bunch of keys just as you threw it, maybe one prophet told the picker that the key to the door of his heavenly blessings will be released to him this week and should be on the lookout

doctokwus:
The person that stole the key is a psycho na,a candidate for Yaba left.
As an aside,mental health is a far more serious issue than you have highlighted because it affects everyday working people,couples and otherwise normally hardworking people with a source of income.
Many people in work places are going through but are bottling it up because it's not an issue that is being critically looked into in Nigeria and mental health challenges has a stigma no one wants to be associated with.
But it's real,it's happening in offices, homes and many facets of Nigerian society.
It's quite distinct from the psycho that stole those keys that have no single use for him.

Ishilove:
I opted to post this in the Health section because I realised, for the first time in all my years in Lagos (and that is my entire life) that many are mad in Lagos but few are are confined in asylums. We don't take mental health seriously enough in Nigeria.

I had left office around 5.30 pm and had not gone far when a junior colleague called me that he had left his entire earthly possessions back in the office, vis his house keys, wallet and phone and the admin office was closed. His excuse was he did not know I would be leaving early. After blasting him for his lackadaisical attitude, I told him where to meet me to get my keys. I was already in transit and the traffic was rapidly moving and If he hurried he would meet me at the traffic light before it turned green.

He drove halfway and had to run the remaining half because of the traffic. He was just about 45 seconds away from me and I could see his approaching form, but the lights had changed to green and we were about moving, so I quickly tossed the bunch of keys on a horizontal signboard on the road median. The dude got to me just as we were about to cross and I yelled at him to go back and check the board. He nodded and ran back.

To my chagrin and ongoing bafflement, he called me back that there were no keys on the board. I told him to check properly, on the sides and even under the board. He rang off, and then called back some minutes later, insisting that he couldn't find any keys. I was forced to alight half way and go back to the junction where all these drama was unfolding. I thought my eyes were paining me when I checked and discovered that the bunch of keys had grown legs and run off in the 45 seconds/ 1 minute it took for my colleague to reach the point where I had tossed the keys.

That is how me and this boy started rigmaroling the road median like construction workers, searching through dirt and grass for my large, shiny bunch of keys that had mysteriously disappeared in plain sight. After about 30 minutes of fruitlessly searching even in portions of the median that I knew I had passed before that fateful toss, we were forced to give up after admitting to ourselves that a Lagosian had seen me tossing the keys and immediately pounced on them like the lunatic he was.

Kai, it is still paining my spirit, soul and body.

My question now is this: what is anyone going to do with a bunch of keys that is totally useless to him? What?

There is a legion of lunatics roaming freely on this streets of the Gidi.

Tallesty1:
And the title of the book I dropped before opening this thread is nearly all the men in lagos are mad