₦airaland Forum

tee59:
I know it's not easy taking care of your family with that little salary of yours. You have every right to take care of your mother, but is she too old to work herself? The money she's given won't be enough for her too. Even your wife can do something now to get more money for the family. That's why, women should have something doing before getting married. Taking care of children is not easy but you need more income.

Pls.. Are you really a female?

Cos all other females ain't looking into the mother's case...

The kids are already above 2 years, why can't their mom also work to at least contribute something.

You Married a parasitic and inconsiderate id1ot as a wife.

This should serve as a lesson to men, if she is not bringing anything to the table don't wife her, pvssy and breast is not enough.

OlawaleBammie:
Ur wife no get any work??

Is ur wife so idle??

She no dey contribute??

Hin own na just to open leg anytym necessary abi??

Am sorry to say that ooh...



Modified:

Sorry, i didnt hear wen u said she's breastfeeding, so if she's has bn contributing before she put to bed well, wait and roju till she wean her babies finish.

Did you read that they have triplets? How can a woman be nursing triplets and still have time to keep a job?

Are these stories for real or fictions? With that amount of salary, don't take child bearing as a priority. The inflation is too much and that money goes no where. Just work to increase ur income, understand ur wife's pain and u will both overcome this phase.

The economic is very hard that the cost of living has skyrocketed. You are trying but current really will not allow your family to enjoy like before. Encourage your wife to keep managing and do not reduce her upkeep. Your mother should not cook her own meal no matter the circumstance. May God bless your handwork so that you can earn more and take care of your family.

Simran94:
A breastfeeding wife of three triplets is what you call greedy and a wicked soul because she’s trying to feed 6 people with 40k monthly? How do you want her three babies to feed? The woman who breastfeeds them, if she isn’t healthy herself, how will the three babies survive?

Some of you boys on NL will just talk like it’s easy being a woman

Is she still breastfeeding kids of 2 years and 3 months? Stop talking nonsense, the wife is a lazy parasite.

Dreytonisback:
Sigh
I pity you tho , honestly I do , wish I can help but I got something to say (The bitter truth)

1. How do y'all decide to get married and raise babies without proper income and even a side business which generates more money ?

That's where you fvcked up bruh
Never get into that family life with brokenness but seems you're already there, may God bless you with a bigger opportunity .

40k is too small , that's right
But 40k is never too small for a sensible woman who truly has a good heart and loves you dearly and understands your hustle

2. How do y'all get married to broke women with nothing to offer?

I mean no disrespect but if by chance I happen to be broke today which will never happen
My wife can carry 1yr responsibility without giving me any attitude
She's done even more during our bf/gf days

If she can't contribute anything and she can't also manage 40k for one month, what if something happens at your place of work and you sit at home for 2 months without a job , what will happen?
Ever thought of that ? No I don't think so .

Your wife's most respected being on Earth should be ur mom not even the husband (you)

If your wife is comfortable feeding ur mom one square meal then she isn't a wifey , I'm sorry
Stop giving her money , just give her 10k
When you're paid monthly, use ur own leg enter bigger market and buy what should serve y'all for a month , if she decides to waste the food , let her being her own money , it's a man and woman that both raise their kids , there isn't anywhere it was written that a man must kill himself for his family when all the wife does is sit at home and add more probs

Lights up my kpoli in peace

This is a wise married man.
Study his BOLD Write ups
NAIRALAND is not just for gimmicks.
It should help people anticipate danger and make informed decisions.

Other SINGLE MEN should learn.
Breasts & Nyansh Fade away.
In Fact, 2 months into marriage, your wife's unclothedness will mean nothing to you again.
You may not remember where her nipples are pointing again.
Wake Up, Guys!

Oga, you better go on your knees and pray hard for GOD's devine intervention.

25K for the upkeep of 3 grown kids and triplets and their mother for a month coupled with the inflation in this country Nigeria.

I don't envy you Sir and you still have Mama to take care of.

There is nothing God can not do, please try hard to manage your wife, don't blame her its not easy to manage those blessing from God, its really tough on women to manage the home with little funds available.

Mennnnnn............ this is real pressure and big challenge.

Are you mentally ok bro Your wife is a gold digger .... No woman dare treat my mother in such a manner ....

Bros e be like say you don chop vegetable...so the upkeep of the triplets depends solely on you alone ba Your wife no reserve or excess before she get belle born triplet...

Bros if you die with the load way you carry for head... You go day surprised day nothing go do your triplets and they will get to where God has ordained them to be with or without you

Don't let any woman give you unncessary pressure cos most of them are ungrateful beings

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets, my salary is 55k. I used to give my wife 20k, mother 10k, 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house.

My wife complained that the money was not enough I added 5k making it 25k monthly but she still demanding for more money and she has threatened to leave if I don't give her more.

I had no money to give her, my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it. My wife used to fight me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house as we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k.

So far, we have moved out of the family house, we are staying in a parlour and room house a brother from Canada gave us the place it is not permanent but it is better and we are very very grateful.

Like I said earlier my mother was staying in church, now we have a one bedroom house I have discussed with my wife for my mum to come and live with us and I will stop the 10k I was giving her and I will add it to her money making it 40k monthly, she has agreed.

Now that my mother is here with us, she started again with the 40k is not enough to feed all of us, note I don't eat breakfast, I eat lunch at work and in the evening I eat at home. She is only giving my mother food in the evening while she and my kids eat 3 Square meal a day.

I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods.

Is my decision good?

Your salary is too small for the load you're carrying and it's looking like an endless rat race unless you do something about improving your financial situation fast, your wife also should get something doing. About feeding your mom once a day, your wife is wrong (wicked) PERIOD. Search for a side business or better paying job fast because even keke and korope drivers give their wives better

Prospertochu:
No problem bro we don't want anymore kids 3 is already enough if she ever fall pregnant I will hang myself, my plan was to start up a business for her but since there is no capital I have asked her to go and work even if it's teaching job she said the salary is poor and she want her own business. I don't know why she is still want me to suffer when she is not handicapped and can also work while my mum watch the kids

but children are blessings from God...you must have more children ( blessings)

aanuoluwami14:
With the current situation in Nigeria, even with management, #50k can't be enough for all of you including your mom. Your wife might be so fed up with the triplets consumption, a woman who will take good care of triplets should be very well fed, it's not a easy task at all. Endure with her, let your mother endure too, pray for more income, there will no more fight again.

The mother should endure eating once a day though the wife cooks & eats thrice a day?
You would be a mother some day, and there are thousands of ways God tests mankind for their various evils

The way you started it all matter most, mind you there are women who doesn't even have that privilege you give your wife.

It is well.

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets, my salary is 55k. I used to give my wife 20k, mother 10k, 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house.

My wife complained that the money was not enough I added 5k making it 25k monthly but she still demanding for more money and she has threatened to leave if I don't give her more.

I had no money to give her, my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it. My wife used to fight me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house as we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k.

So far, we have moved out of the family house, we are staying in a parlour and room house a brother from Canada gave us the place it is not permanent but it is better and we are very very grateful.

Like I said earlier my mother was staying in church, now we have a one bedroom house I have discussed with my wife for my mum to come and live with us and I will stop the 10k I was giving her and I will add it to her money making it 40k monthly, she has agreed.

Now that my mother is here with us, she started again with the 40k is not enough to feed all of us, note I don't eat breakfast, I eat lunch at work and in the evening I eat at home. She is only giving my mother food in the evening while she and my kids eat 3 Square meal a day.

I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods.

Is my decision good?

Realestbae:
Stupid fool ,u r putting all d blame on a young mother of triplet when Ur lazy mother can not fend for herself, imagine Ur sister is a household is ur mother crippled or just lazy she is supposed to be supplying U with food stuff n by adding to Ur problem or is it how her own mother is depending on her. Oga Ur mother did n't plan her life well she is more of a leech n a bloodsucker let her go and hustle to take care of Ur sister who is a household. Ur main focus should be d welfare of Ur kids feed them well

See how u defended a witch and antagonized an innocent old women just cos u cant judge without sentiments. U ever wonder why women are not usually entrusted sentitive high positions.
Have u heard of twist of fate, have u ever heard of a change in circumstance, u think that someone that planned her life cannot suddenly experience tribulation.
All the insult u laballed on this woman shall be returned to u in hundred fold by you daughter in law when you will already be incapacitated and helpless. Ami, Ami, Ami, Oruko Jesu.

aanuoluwami14:
With the current situation in Nigeria, even with management, #50k can't be enough for all of you including your mom. Your wife might be so fed up with the triplets consumption, a woman who will take good care of triplets should be very well fed, it's not a easy task at all. Endure with her, let your mother endure too, pray for more income, there will no more fight again.

Aunty,as a single guy, living alone with my 2months old puppy,60k no deh reach 2 weeks aswear, things are really costly,men gats to double their hustles,e no easy oooh,,,hmmm

bluefilm:
You married an End Time wife.

We are in the End Time.

So expect more End Time abnormal things from her.

Sorry.

O'boy...
What did I just read?
I no no whether to laugh or cry!

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets, my salary is 55k. I used to give my wife 20k, mother 10k, 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house.

My wife complained that the money was not enough I added 5k making it 25k monthly but she still demanding for more money and she has threatened to leave if I don't give her more.

I had no money to give her, my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it. My wife used to fight me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house as we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k.

So far, we have moved out of the family house, we are staying in a parlour and room house a brother from Canada gave us the place it is not permanent but it is better and we are very very grateful.

Like I said earlier my mother was staying in church, now we have a one bedroom house I have discussed with my wife for my mum to come and live with us and I will stop the 10k I was giving her and I will add it to her money making it 40k monthly, she has agreed.

Now that my mother is here with us, she started again with the 40k is not enough to feed all of us, note I don't eat breakfast, I eat lunch at work and in the evening I eat at home. She is only giving my mother food in the evening while she and my kids eat 3 Square meal a day.

I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods.

Is my decision good?

Let me make it straight to the point. YOU HAVE THE WRONG KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING ABOUT MARRIAGE. As they talk am "nobody put bottle for your mouth" , so the reason you are suffering is because you have the wrong knowledge of marriage.
I just saw a news on front page about a couple who just welcomed triplets. I looked and said this is not good news to me, but I couldn't call it bad news because I don't know the family. So what is this knowledge you lack, what is this knowledge?
OP, it is that a woman should be able to take care of one child alone, and a man should be able to take care of one child alone.
The only expenses you should be paying is for the last child.
But how you were able to pay bride price surprises me.

aanuoluwami14:
With the current situation in Nigeria, even with management, #50k can't be enough for all of you including your mom. Your wife might be so fed up with the triplets consumption, a woman who will take good care of triplets should be very well fed, it's not a easy task at all. Endure with her, let your mother endure too, pray for more income, there will no more fight again.

You mumu sha

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets, my salary is 55k. I used to give my wife 20k, mother 10k, 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house.

I had no money to give her, my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it. My wife used to fight me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house as we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k.

I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods.

Is my decision good?

Bro, I read through all the adjustments you have made and honestly you're brave!! You have tried, and so has your wife. Don't give your mum separate money for feeding under the same roof, it's not economical. How will she cook? You need extra income, that is the solution you're looking for now and what you must pursue aggressively this year. I pray doors of opportunity open for you and your family.

Look I understand the issue here but for anyone to treat my father and mother like rubbish is a big fat NO. I Don't understand why you are getting married on 55k per month. Even me that is earning far more per month after tax, I am not willing to settle down with a Nigerian women. How old is your mum? Does she have other kids? You all should contribute something so she can start a business. Can your mum be moved to the family house at least temporary? If you wife is unsatisfied with your efforts, send her back to her father's house and you must provide monthly for your triplets upkeep. I sympathize with your situation. Being a married man in Nigeria is not easy, especially in Buhari's economy. If there is a way your story can be verified, I am willing to donate something to you. Either way, best of luck.

Acidosis:
Your cousin had one not three at the same time. Are you even aware that those triplets can send the old woman to her grave due to stress?

OP's wife is going through a lot and only the man and maybe relatives can help in this situation. I can't even imagine how she sleeps at night.

So the op's wife is the victim here right? Continue.

aanuoluwami14:
With the current situation in Nigeria, even with management, #50k can't be enough for all of you including your mom. Your wife might be so fed up with the triplets consumption, a woman who will take good care of triplets should be very well fed, it's not a easy task at all. Endure with her, let your mother endure too, pray for more income, there will no more fight again.

So if the woman is ur mother, u will advise her to eat once a day?

Kobojunkie:
55k a month for a family of 5 and you want to have your mother added to that list? You are very very unserious individual.

so would u rather he leaves the poor mother to die off, is better they manage and endure together mothers are priceless

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets, my salary is 55k. I used to give my wife 20k, mother 10k, 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house.

My wife complained that the money was not enough I added 5k making it 25k monthly but she still demanding for more money and she has threatened to leave if I don't give her more.

I had no money to give her, my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it. My wife used to fight me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house as we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k.

So far, we have moved out of the family house, we are staying in a parlour and room house a brother from Canada gave us the place it is not permanent but it is better and we are very very grateful.

Like I said earlier my mother was staying in church, now we have a one bedroom house I have discussed with my wife for my mum to come and live with us and I will stop the 10k I was giving her and I will add it to her money making it 40k monthly, she has agreed.

Now that my mother is here with us, she started again with the 40k is not enough to feed all of us, note I don't eat breakfast, I eat lunch at work and in the evening I eat at home. She is only giving my mother food in the evening while she and my kids eat 3 Square meal a day.

I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods.

Is my decision good?

Baba pls calm down and don't hate your wife. Current situation of things on this country can make the most loving wife to be the worst. You have triplets and another kid. It's not easy feeding those little babies as they can eat anything eatable.i am not saying you should forget your mother as they very important in our lives. Try to reason with your wife and let understanding come in between you guys please.

Prospertochu:
I am married with three kids 2 years and 3 months triplets, my salary is 55k. I used to give my wife 20k, mother 10k, 5k for rainy days and 20k for myself transportation and other expenses outside my house.

My wife complained that the money was not enough I added 5k making it 25k monthly but she still demanding for more money and she has threatened to leave if I don't give her more.

I had no money to give her, my own mother was homeless staying in church and I couldn't stop giving her that 10k because she needed it. My wife used to fight me every single day and my uncle asked us to leave the family house as we were disturbing their peace and I was ready to let her go and I will be sending 25k for our triplets upkeep every month but for the sake of our kids we have settled down with 30k monthly leaving me with 15k.

So far, we have moved out of the family house, we are staying in a parlour and room house a brother from Canada gave us the place it is not permanent but it is better and we are very very grateful.

Like I said earlier my mother was staying in church, now we have a one bedroom house I have discussed with my wife for my mum to come and live with us and I will stop the 10k I was giving her and I will add it to her money making it 40k monthly, she has agreed.

Now that my mother is here with us, she started again with the 40k is not enough to feed all of us, note I don't eat breakfast, I eat lunch at work and in the evening I eat at home. She is only giving my mother food in the evening while she and my kids eat 3 Square meal a day.

I asked her why she is treating my mother so badly she said the economy is hard if she doesn't have she won't kill herself. I am sick and tired and if I have sorted things it was for the sake of our kids and now I am starting to regret. I am thinking from this month when I get my salary I will give her 30k and give my mother 10k to be cooking her own foods.

Is my decision good?

I understand your ordeal, all will be well my brother. Just try and seat your wife down and make her see what you are going through, make her understand your condition will not forever be like that. And try and plead with her for the sake of your children. Or better still find someone she holds in a high esteem to talk to her

All will be well my brother

aanuoluwami14:
With the current situation in Nigeria, even with management, #50k can't be enough for all of you including your mom. Your wife might be so fed up with the triplets consumption, a woman who will take good care of triplets should be very well fed, it's not a easy task at all. Endure with her, let your mother endure too, pray for more income, there will no more fight again.

You off me with pray for more income. Nigerians and prayer

Why not ask him what skills he has and see if you can advise him on how to improve himself and increase his earning potential.

I am sure it is the pray for more income from people like you that landed him into the situation of starting to make babies while living in his uncle's house?

Bola146:
Haaaaaaaaa I know how frustrated your wife would be while breastfeeding those 3 kids at once sir, it's not easy, she will be feeling hungry at anytime, feeding the triplets alone excluding you, your wife and mother, 50k can't be enough sir. Things are too costly in the market. You and your mother need to be very patience with her please. I pray that God send helpers to you and your family. You might apply for better jobs with better pay if you see. Please don't be too harsh to your wife and kids. It's because of this Buhari regime, it will soon be over. Keep praying and have faith that things will be alright one day.






That is why I hate married people bringing out their dirties outside especially on nairaland, those irresponsible married men who can't give their wives and children #20k per month would come out here to type rubbish leading you astray. Please ignore all those people saying too harsh words at you. Cry unto God your helper for better job to take good care of yourself and your family, don't let their words turn to depression to your life.

You are a woman of substance, a virtuous woman. I doff my hat for you. I love reading well thought out responses like this. May God direct your steps to a man who truly deserve you (if you are single).

You've done so much that I even imagine and only a senseless woman will want to go to this extent of denying your mum some peace and food at least 2x.

I wish you could let you have a way to settle your mum elsewhere and keep up with the stipend you can afford while your wife work her money too even if it's setting her up for petty business. Some women need to learn to appreciate sacrifices made by their men for them. I can't tolerate certain excesses as much as I know and this marriage journey is really patience and far from the glamour boyfriend and girlfriend parole.

Kobojunkie:
Oh now I see where you are going with this. You think this is another one of your useless "us vs them" arguments? No wonder you are unable to see the foolishness of OP'S attempts to blame his predicament on his wife.

Did the Op in fact state that his mother would take on full-time care of his triplets to allow his wife work or are you simply inserting that here so you can blindly turn this into gender war as is your usual?,

Someone is denying his mum food, but she shouldn't be blamed right. Would she treat her mum the same way

i sorry for who nor sorry for you

Lesson Learnt:

Zip up and abstain from premarital sex while you huzzle hard.

Even those calling the op a simp can't even abide by the above advice except for the f@ggots of course who want op to join them.

I pity your mum and the triplets.