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Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Nobody: 2:46pm On Feb 05, 2022
You are just scared
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Clash01: 2:46pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
Incase you are ready to have a child please let me know. I'm handsome and I'm from edo state
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by alizma: 2:48pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
1) Hustle to have enough for yourself and your kids.
2) the guy that ask out only want you for sex, his reaction is just a ploy to hit you. 90% of those who start with I want to marry you, always end up doing the opposite
3) ask yourself if that is what you really want and if your mind is made up, always endeavor to tell anyone you are in a relationship with as early as possible but not at the beginning of the relationship, there are guys out there that want the same thing
4) finally be ready to be second wife if that turns out to be the case. It is easier to get a married or a divorcee to understand and cherish your idea than a single man.
Success
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Pimine: 2:48pm On Feb 05, 2022
Aswearugaaad

In one word, yes!
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by mmsen:
No, anyone who thinks signing a lifetime contract is unintelligent, especially nowadays with the way people cheat.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by SoapQueen(f): 2:50pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
No, you're not.

Best believe, there are many women like you out there.

As long as you allow the kids access to their father and vice versa, there's no issue.

Importantly, take your time.

Please, do not allow society to marry (or not).

You'll be fine.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Lucasmuyiwaa: 2:53pm On Feb 05, 2022
I understand you very very well dear. I also hate that marriage stuff and I always tell my friends all I want is a baby mama. Though, not just give birth to a kid but spoil my baby mama and kid with money and everything. I also think sometimes to just have a relationship and rent an apartment for my girlfriend or baby mama. She can do anything she wants with her life Andi can also do anything I want myself without any misunderstanding or something
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by WongFeiHong(m): 2:55pm On Feb 05, 2022
You are just confused. That's all.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by calcal: 2:55pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
Fear leads to self-destruction
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by famouscargo4u: 2:56pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
That's cool. A other person reasoning like me.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by SimplePlan34: 2:56pm On Feb 05, 2022
No u are not
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Goldbw122(m): 2:56pm On Feb 05, 2022
Hmm do what ever makes you happy dear
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Pufpuf(m): 2:59pm On Feb 05, 2022
I don't want marriage too, contact me bcoz I have answers to your wants
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Goldbw122(m): 3:00pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
The ideal of not marrying and not been a cage is your decision, but if you find the one that is truely in love with you pls do marry on for my sake, but if you say that you just wasn't to give birth it is ok so that your linage and bloodline will continue to produce, and you will be giving other people life ahead of you..
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by CSTRR: 3:02pm On Feb 05, 2022
Why are you telling us?

Countless women all over the world will never get married.

It's a fact of life.

You are not alone.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by CSTRR: 3:03pm On Feb 05, 2022
Goldbw122:
The ideal of not marrying and not been a cage is your decision, but if you find the one that is truely in love with you pls do marry on for my sake, but if you say that you just wasn't to give birth it is ok so that your linage and bloodline will continue to produce, and you will be giving other people life ahead of you..
You don't need marriage to procreate.

Given how cheap men are, getting a random fool to impregnate her should not be a big deal.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Ybaby: 3:05pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
Very valid point and shows deep thought.

It will be stupid to get into a prison marriage like some people

It will also be stupid to have a good and kind person who will look after you and you do same for them and refuse that.

Be more open minded.... get some therapy

You are smart !
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by habakukjss3: 3:05pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
Yes, you are very much stupid for not wanting marriage

Because the only crazy reason u mentioned is because you are authoritative and can't submit to man.

People like you are killing the societal values set by Africa forefathers
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by richie240:
You are not dumb, u are just 'woke'.
Even if u were a man I would still advice u Not to marry!

Only d wise will understand!
cool
Abetterperson:
.I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.
....but I won't subscribe to formication in d guise of babies daddies/mummies.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Savedday: 3:05pm On Feb 05, 2022
9ja girls are out to add more burden to your life instead of softening it.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by Nobody: 3:07pm On Feb 05, 2022
The Lord is your strength.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by LastProphet: 3:09pm On Feb 05, 2022
SanctifiedSista:
You are not stupid for not wanting marriage, u never saw a good marriage and the negative things u have been seeing can cement your decision..u are also young and don't see the necessity of it, that's why u don't want to enter
But it's only when u seek to know that u will find.
People may print fake money but dosent mean people will not stop hunting for the genuine thing..so seek to know the reason for marriage and GOD will answer u..HE will bring a wonderful man your way that u can't imagine life without that person.
Kill that baby mama or fornication thought of remaining boyfriend and girlfriend forever..u are built for more so don't reduce yourself into a life of foolish decisions and heavy repercussions
A word is enough for the wise...reach out to me let's talk if u need more clarification
Another illiterate reading only Bible or Koran, dear OP go on with your life, look for a big dream and run after it, if you meet a worthy man along the way married him, if you don't continue driving towards your dream. Don't make having husband and children your destiny like some of these mumufied commenters.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by SeriouslySense(m): 3:09pm On Feb 05, 2022
Watch-out for warning signs, of psychopathy, narcissism and self absorbed personalities. Especially the ones, that isolates you from friends, and family or wants you to be dependent on them so they have power over you.

Also watch out for the ones with anger issues, and also shady or mysterious characters, who hide things and lie every time.

Also watch out for the range of emotions, and how he sees the world and does he blame people for his failures (its a warming sign)

Finally my dear, watch out for personalities, that demean you, or make you feel good and then make you feel bad, they want you to depend on their approval.

I guess, you are an independent woman (meaning you value being self reliant), and its not wrong, there are men who love such traits.

You need to read good books on relationships to summarize it. grin grin grin grin

Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by ogianyo(m): 3:10pm On Feb 05, 2022
Well do whatever you want. I'm not sure how old you bit I wish we could have this conversation again wen you are maybe 50 years old.
Many years ago I came close to your conclusions. I had kids. They lived with me cos I could afford to look after them. I didn't need no woman coming to cramp my style. I had a running argument with my mum about why I was done with marriage.
She said words that I would never forget. Marriage is not for now when you are young and dont need anyone or someone to come cramp your space. But a time comes when you would cry for every kind of discomfort as long as you had quality companionship. She told me that the girls I could get freely with a snap of my fingers was also for a time. That I would get to an age when to even initiate a chap with a lady in public will be difficult to do. A lot that I cant say here .So marriage is good for raising kids. There are many other reasons for getting with someone in a long term committed relationship.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by samwillyco1(m): 3:10pm On Feb 05, 2022
I need your type grin grin grin
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by meobizy(m): 3:11pm On Feb 05, 2022
Not my concern and OP is less than 28. Let’s see if she will sing the same song at age 40.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by seyz91(m): 3:11pm On Feb 05, 2022
You are okay lady

We all want what we want


It is what it is
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by DeepSight(m): 3:11pm On Feb 05, 2022
Abetterperson:
I don't really fancy married at all, it as to do with my upbringing I never grow up in a stable home and I found happiness when my parents were apart rather than together. I really don't like the idea of marriage because I see it as a cage, mind you im not totally against it I just think it wouldn't suit me, I never grew up in a family home so I don't know how to build one.

A guy asked me out and I agreed only on the condition that we wouldn't get married, he refused saying what's the point of the relationship if it wouldn't lead to marriage, even though I don't like the idea of marriage I do want to feel loved and wanted, I still do want kids and some sort of companionship, as crazy as it sounds I just want a baby daddy, I wouldn't have a child with him because I want to money, nop I'm already trying to establish myself, I really want to be financially independent so as to take care of my kids
Now the main reason I don't want marriage is because of my Independence, I don't want to answer to anyone at all and I know it will be difficult if I'm married to someone because in every marriage there is a level of dependence that is needed to make the marriage work, whether you are a man or woman u don't just do what you like especially when there is a child involved, secondly I'm thinking about the emotional stress my kids will go though if the marriage doesn't work, I don't want my child to grew up with memories of dad beating mum, mum shouting at dad, mum throwing a knife at dad and incase I do divorce I don't want my child to be in a state of depression, thirdly most Nigeria men treat their wives as trash, I Know what I'm talking about they don't value their wives, some see them as property other than an actual human being, some think of their wives as house maids and will refuse to do anything in the house or even allow the woman to get a help, some are also serial cheaters and don't see anything wrong with cheating because as they put it "I be man". Now I know that some women are equally as bad but I'm just stating my concern as a woman after all I'm not going to walk down the alter with a woman by my side.
So that's all I need my Independence, stability and control, people are saying I will regret but I really think it's for the best for me, I feel like I have a lot of time to think as I plan on having children at 28 but I don't know if my opinion will change then.

I'm I stupid for not wanting marriage?
You do you.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by ibechris(m): 3:12pm On Feb 05, 2022
No need to marry jor.

We need population control. At least it will benefit us all.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by techWriter3: 3:13pm On Feb 05, 2022
Sure you not not.Different shots for different people.
Re: Am I Dumb For Not Wanting To Get Married As A Woman by franciskainex: 3:16pm On Feb 05, 2022
Moneyboyz:
You won't know it now,but you will in future.
You would wish you have the power to go back in time and remake your decisions.

I might be right or wrong, fingers crossed.
you're right. I had a friend who is always of this opinion men are scum blabla, and dat she will neva get married. Dat she wished to av her baby without a father figure. Unfortunately for her na so reality dawn on her with a baby without a father. She has 90% regretted her mistake.
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