thorpido:
Moral decadence and social media...ease of hooking up.
The biggest problem I think is a lack of love on the husbands' part.The sex especially is poor or rarely happens.

Is this an excuse though?

Or are we saying husbands in prior times were better lovers?

bukatyne:


Is this an excuse though?

Or are we saying husbands in prior times were better lovers?

No,I'm not excusing the behavior.I'm just saying that is where some women have found themselves and decide to do something about it rather than 'hope'.

This is bound to happen na. Someone slept with more than 20 men within 25 years, and you expect that same person to stick with one partner for 70 years because of wedding band? Kolewerk na.

Go to a typical university campus and see what young girls do with their bodies. You can't have a body count of 30 before age 30 and expect that same body to adjust to one count for life because of vow. The raging hormones you failed to put under control do not give a fvck about your vow or whatever it is you did on your wedding day.

The decision to remain faithful to one partner MUST begin in your teenage years. You can't possibly train your body to remain faithful few weeks to your wedding.

Old wine ALWAYS taste better

LadyRosa:
Well,it's no news that there is now a surge in women, married women committing adultery in today's Nigeria.Out of 10 adultery cases on nairaland, more than half has got women as the culprit.Infact, only this week on Frontpage,more than 10 cases from nairalanders has been recorded.

Why now?What went wrong? What could be the reasons for the skyrocketing cases of cheating wives?

Revenge?

Bad xxxx?
Economic limitations and the need to keep up financial independence in gender competitive Nigeria?
Domestic abuse and subjugation?
Religious ingenuity by respected clerics?
Age?
Social media and it's larger than life attributes,a platform where disadvantaged persons can paint a picture perfect life and get away with it?

OR?
Has men become really effeminate?

I now noticed this ugly strain in NL, disgusting yet calls for deep reflection.Our men are becoming more and more loquacious than their female counterpart,they complain too much.This bantle of 'bitterness' associated with Nigeria women as been thrown to the men.Its really disgusting to say the least,I think women are supposed to be the talkatives here and not the men.Omo,the rants are getting worst with the males ñot even giving the women chance to express themselves EVEN on threads that are specifically for the women.I believe that it shows there are more jobless men than women in Nigeria.Loads and lot of verbal assault been hurled and women who have now decided to see nothing wrong in being a baby mama or a LovePeddler.Now,many of them glorifies the word.We can see that with the way a lady exposed her white pant in a birthday photoshoot recently.

So many damaged marriages.Single women and men competing in corporations, having illicit Bleep,going home to sleep like nothing happened , resuming next day competing with each other all over again.I have friends in the island who live like this.The married ones still sleep around,the single ones keep late nights with different guys and in all I noticed they value money more than marriage.As long as the money keeps rolling in,Omo _penis no hard to get,na money be de Koko.
And it is what it is.As long as _vagina ain't free,_penis is and so for the women,it's a win win for them You pay to get mine by cash or otherwise,I get yours any damn time I want.So?

Marriage in general is truly overrated.

It will surely get worst.

1. Marriage is not over rated.

2. The root cause of adultery is greed: I want to hold on to whatever I have (irrespective of how good or bad I claim it is) and get something else on the side. If a husband/wife is not good, let them go and find someone else

3. This new age woke teaching of 'I do what makes me happy' or 'I own my body' or 'I am not accountable to anyone' or 'I am equal to a man' or 'I am free' etc etc have removed the restrictions women previously placed on themselves to be faithful in their marriages.

4. The stupid age long belief that men are polygamous while women are/should be monogamous contributed to this. Regardless of continuously glamourizing homosexuality, more men would be heterosexual. That means they are cheating on their wives with other women. Considering the fact that women are putting much more effort in maintaining their looks today, married women would join their target market.

5. Husbands are losing the quality of masculinity and leadership due to
a. Cheating themselves so they have lost the moral right to demand faithfulness. This sometimes birth 'revenge adultery';
b. Unable to command their wives' respect;
c. Subscription to woke ideas such as feminism. A male feminist is an aberration like a female red piller or a red pill girl.

6. General moral decadence. More men & women lack home training, contentment, sexual restraint etc.

7. Carry over of the wayward lifestyle into marriage. Wokeness would teach you that sex is just sex and you can have your feel and then 'settle down'. Unfortunately, there is no 'marriageometer' or 'marriagepill' that makes you suddenly desire to be with one man/woman after sleeping with everyone.

8. The husband: bad sex, no sex, no relationship and every other shenanigans you can blame him for. However, my opinion is my point number 2: if he is not good enough for you, let him go.

9. In rare occasions, poverty.

10. The news? It has just started.

thorpido:
No,I'm not excusing the behavior.I'm just saying that is where some women have found themselves and decide to do something about it rather than 'hope'.

But the 'do something' is not sustainable she is a Christian.

It means multiple adulteries till she is tired.

bukatyne:


1. Marriage is not over rated.

2. The root cause of adultery is greed: I want to hold on to whatever I have (irrespective of how good or bad I claim it is) and get something else on the side. If a husband/wife is not good, let them go and find someone else

3. This new age woke teaching of 'I do what makes me happy' or 'I own my body' or 'I am not accountable to anyone' or 'I am equal to a man' or 'I am free' etc etc have removed the restrictions women previously placed on themselves to be faithful in their marriages.

4. The stupid age long belief that men are polygamous while women are/should be monogamous contributed to this. Regardless of continuously glamourizing homosexuality, more men would be heterosexual. That means they are cheating on their wives with other women. Considering the fact that women are putting much more effort in maintaining their looks today, married women would join their target market.

5. Husbands are losing the quality of masculinity and leadership due to
a. Cheating themselves so they have lost the moral right to demand faithfulness. This sometimes birth 'revenge adultery';
b. Unable to command their wives' respect;
c. Subscription to woke ideas such as feminism. A male feminist is an aberration like a female red piller or a red pill girl.

6. General moral decadence. More men & women lack home training, contentment, sexual restraint etc.

7. Carry over of the wayward lifestyle into marriage. Wokeness would teach you that sex is just sex and you can have your feel and then 'settle down'. Unfortunately, there is no 'marriageometer' or 'marriagepill' that makes you suddenly desire to be with one man/woman after sleeping with everyone.

8. The husband: bad sex, no sex, no relationship and every other shenanigans you can blame him for. However, my opinion is my point number 2: if he is not good enough for you, let him go.

9. In rare occasions, poverty.

10. The news? It has just started.

This 'I am equal to a man' so you do not believe that women and men are equal?

bukatyne:


But the 'do something' is not sustainable she is a Christian.

It means multiple adulteries till she is tired.

That's where many have lost it.

No one wants to endure in marriage anymore especially women, since they've been doing that from time immemorial while men behave anyhow they like, so they help themselves outside as best and discreet as they can while maintaining the home front as usual.

Heiterkeit:



This 'I am equal to a man' so you do not believe that women and men are equal?

I believe men and women are equal.

Biglittlelois:

1. No one wants to endure in marriage anymore especially women,


since they've been doing that from time immemorial while men behave anyhow they like, so they help themselves outside as best and discreet as they can while maintaining the home front as usual.

1. If women do not want to endure anymore,

Isn't better to
a. Marry the right person
b. Divorce the husband if they are no longer interested

How does sleeping around stop the 'suffering' & 'endurance' they are expected to do since they still maintaining the home front?

Heiterkeit:



This 'I am equal to a man' so you do not believe that women and men are equal?

Why do you want to be equal to a man? You don't like being woman?

bukatyne:

1. If women do not want to endure anymore,

Isn't better to
a. Marry the right person
b. Divorce the husband if they are no longer interested

How does sleeping around stop the 'suffering' & 'endurance' they are expected to do since they still maintaining the home front?

Marry the right person? Everyone, men and women, believe they married the right person till they are in the marriage, then certain personality or traits tells them otherwise

Yeah some divorce if they are no longer interested, and some stay because of the kids or whatever reason best known to them, while some prefer to frolick around because it suits them instead of going through the long process of divorce.

Sleeping around stops the "endurance and suffering" if the problem is sexual starvation, so instead of the usual "pray and hope for your husband to change" or "watch war room" etc, they help themselves outside, so everyone is good and happy.

Well it the century we are now

Feminism

Social influence

Biglittlelois:



1. Marry the right person? Everyone, men and women, believe they married the right person till they are in the marriage, then certain personality or traits tells them otherwise

2. Yeah some divorce if they are no longer interested, and some stay because of the kids or whatever reason best known to them, while some prefer to frolick around because it suits them instead of going through the long process of divorce.

3. Sleeping around stops the "endurance and suffering" if the problem is sexual starvation, so instead of the usual "pray and hope for your husband to change" or "watch war room" etc, they help themselves outside, so everyone is good and happy.

1. This cracked me up

2. The moment a person decides to frolick, they have lost the right to complain.

3. Does it? What if the problem is not sexual starvation? How many women are 'enduring' their marriages because of sexual starvation?

EmptyGarden:
They are now WOKE.
As opposed to sticking to a fruit, women now prefer fruit salad.

That's why real men now resort to JuJu to tie their wives toto.

Next time, you go know say marriage no be freedom.

bukatyne:


1. This cracked me up

2. The moment a person decides to frolick, they have lost the right to complain.

3. Does it? What if the problem is not sexual starvation? How many women are 'enduring' their marriages because of sexual starvation?

2) Who is complaining? I don't see anyone that fits my narrative complaining, Op brought this topic up as a sort of concern

3) So why do they help themselves outside if they are getting it from their husband? Remember, the topic is about adultery.

Biglittlelois:



2) Who is complaining? I don't see anyone that fits my narrative complaining, Op brought this topic up as a sort of concern

3) So why do they help themselves outside if they are getting it from their husband? Remember, the topic is about adultery.

2. I meant if a person committing adultery because of a spouse's short coming, they can't complain about the short coming anymore


3. Do wives only commit adultery because their husbands suck at sex?

bukatyne:


2. I meant if a person committing adultery because of a spouse's short coming, they can't complain about the short coming anymore


3. Do wives only commit adultery because their husbands suck at sex?

Of course

Why else? Sex is the end game here, or if there is another reason, let's hear it.

Biglittlelois:


Of course

Why else? Sex is the end game here, or if there is another reason, let's hear it.

Sex is the end game but poor sex is not the primary reason women cheat. Poor sex won't even make the top 10 reasons. The main reasons are desire for sexual varieties (because the body has been trained to move from one man to another), situational factors like vacation/holidays/parties, being drunk, etc.

We don't have much of these issues in the previous generations because women were told to preserve their bodies for their husbands. These days, marriage is the worst place to be for anyone who's had several sexual experiences.

Acidosis:


Sex is the end game but poor sex is not the primary reason women cheat. Poor sex won't even make the top 10 reasons. The main reasons are desire for sexual varieties (because the body has been trained to move from one man to another), situational factors like vacation/holidays/parties, being drunk, etc.

We don't have much of these issues in the previous generations because women were told to preserve their bodies for their husbands. These days, marriage is the worst place to be for anyone who's had several sexual experiences.

Women cheat because of the desire for sexual varieties? Lol, and here I was thinking sexual varieties are solely men's forte because they are "polygamous in nature", I didnt know it applied to women, good to know

So you are saying all married women who have had several sexual experiences are the ones presently cheating? None can be or is faithful? Women who married as virgins are faithful to a 't', they can never cheat on their husband? A human still thinks this way in this 21st century? Lol ok.

I choose to respond to this particular question rather than the one in the main topic.

You're right about Nigerian women evolving but what you didn't pay attention to is the fallout of such evolution.

With more financial freedom and exposure, women are exploring their sexuality. I like to call it harlotry. They become more unsubmissive and seek to take control of any relationship they may have with a man. Now, except for spiritual and socio-cultural interference, most men are Alphas and won't cede such authority to a woman. So while the woman enjoys her new sets of freedom -- financial autonomy and all the bells and whistles that come along with it, she becomes more rebellious. Her job also has a toll on her as well. Making more fatigued and less sexually active.

These are much an alpha would be willing to put up with for much longer and would naturally turn to younger, barely legal girls, freshly crossing the red gate of adolescent into green shoot adults. These freshies have minimal toxic exposure compared to their older female counterparts and would yield naturally to the male sheer power and dominance, making the alpha to dote on her. She becomes the object of envy amongst her peers and older ladies alike.

Now, these old, financially independent women being pushed down from the perking order find themselves either as 2nd wives to way older men, or get entangled with a simp their age or become sugar mummies. Most end up getting married eventually but not to the men of their preference and are far more prone to engage in extramarital affairs.

LadyRosa:
Now, another question is I want to ask is

"Who sleep with these girls?"

There's this disturbing I keep asking myself.Who sleep with this teenagers?I live in a well fenced and conservative environment where kids ofcourse in their teens sit and talk to each other in fields around the estate.They visit each other and go to parties in homes around the estate.

Yes! We see them stroll.While we jug we can tell they may be dating.Hell, sometimes parents joke with teens shy display of affection.

But, there's something that's always off at some point.The girls.If a boy of 16 is having sex with a girl of 15,I know.You will still see that juvenile innocence in her.BUT,it's not the case these days.They may be moving with their age but there's a predator who climbs them, especially married men who don't care tge difference btw a girl who is maturing and one who is matured.The behavior of that teen tells you she is not mating with her age mate even though she moves with them.

Biglittlelois:

Women cheat because of the desire for sexual varieties? Lol, and here I was thinking sexual varieties are solely men's forte because they are "polygamous in nature", I didnt know it applied to women, good to know

So you are saying all married women who have had several sexual experiences are the ones presently cheating? None can be or is faithful? Women who married as virgins are faithful to a 't', they can never cheat on their husband? A human still thinks this way in this 21st century? Lol ok.

No, I didn't say that. We are talking about married women who commit adultery and the reasons for such act. Asides from multiple sexual experiences, I cited other reasons.

But to clear the doubts, having multiple sexual experiences certainly increases the likelihood to cheat. It applies to both men and women. You can't certainly tell me that a man who cheats and sleeps with anything under a skirt before marriage will be as faithful as a timid guy who rarely approach women.

This is not a virgin Vs nonvirgin issue, but go and check the stats of women who complain about their husband's cheating habit. How many of them married virgin men?

Acidosis:


Why do you want to be equal to a man? You don't like being woman?

You must be a chauvinist. Or how are men superior to women?

bukatyne:


I believe men and women are equal.

But in your post I quoted, you said otherwise.

Heiterkeit:



You must be a chauvinist. Or how are men superior to women?

Even if I tell you that a woman is superior to a man, how will that help your life, knowing very well that you don't enjoy the same privilege with Buhari's son?

No basis for comparing a woman with a man. In men's world, people are not equal. And in marriage, people play different roles.

Acidosis:


Even if I tell you that a woman is superior to a man, how will that help your life, knowing very well that you don't enjoy the same privilege with Buhari's son?

No basis for comparing a woman with a man. In men's world, people are not equal.

You assumed that I do not enjoy the same privilege with Buhari's son because you are too limited in your mind that it did not occur to you that not everyone on Nairaland is a Nigerian or in Nigeria, and that your Buhari's son does not enjoy better privilege than some of us, which of course neither make us superior to him nor inferior to him.

Stop always behaving like an uninformed clown.

..

Heiterkeit:


So, since I enjoy more privilege than an uninformed clown like you, I am superior to you, and using you and I as the base fr general comparison between women and men, women are superior than me.

As the word equality left her totally confused about her state of mind and purpose, weyrey switched to superior/inferior.

By the way, you possibly can't be superior to me. Take that fact to your husband or whatever it is you're dating. Go and prove your gender superiority in your home.

postmann:
I choose to respond to this particular question rather than the one in the main topic.

You're right about Nigerian women evolving but what you didn't pay attention to is the fallout of such evolution.

With more financial freedom and exposure, women are exploring their sexuality. I like to call it harlotry. They become more unsubmissive and seek to take control of any relationship they may have with a man. Now, except for spiritual and socio-cultural interference, most men are Alphas and won't cede such authority to a woman. So while the woman enjoys her new sets of freedom -- financial autonomy and all the bells and whistles that come along with it, she becomes more rebellious. Her job also has a toll on her as well. Making more fatigued and less sexually active.

These are much an alpha would be willing to put up with for much longer and would naturally turn to younger, barely legal girls, freshly crossing the red gate of adolescent into green shoot adults. These freshies have minimal toxic exposure compared to their older female counterparts and would yield naturally to the male sheer power and dominance, making the alpha to dote on her. She becomes the objects of envy amongst her peers and older ladies alike.

Now, these old, financial independent women being pushed down from the perking order find themselves either as 2nd wives to way older men, or get entangled with a simp their age or become sugar mummies. Most end up getting married eventually but not to the men of their preference and are far more prone to engage in extramarital affairs.

You have a way with words.

Although, contempt for women seem to be your muse.
I hope to someday read something positive from you (not necessarily about women) that will not require you bashing women, then will I be convinced.

Acidosis:


I don't care who what you are, or wherever it is you came from: cave or coven. You do not enjoy the same privilege with certain people but you can empirically come up with data in your head to f00l no one but yourself in your clownish state of mind about your state of equality with everyone just because they share the same planet with you.

So, since I enjoy more privilege than an uninformed clown like you, I am superior to you, and using you and I as the base for a general comparison between women and men, women are superior than men.

Heiterkeit:


So, since I enjoy more privilege than an uninformed clown like you, I am superior to you, and using you and I as the base for a general comparison between women and men, women are superior than men.

Now you see how dumb you sound when you compare people on the basis of their distinct gender? Are you superior to your father?

postmann:
I choose to respond to this particular question rather than the one in the main topic.

You're right about Nigerian women evolving but what you didn't pay attention to is the fallout of such evolution.

With more financial freedom and exposure, women are exploring their sexuality. I like to call it harlotry. They become more unsubmissive and seek to take control of any relationship they may have with a man. Now, except for spiritual and socio-cultural interference, most men are Alphas and won't cede such authority to a woman. So while the woman enjoys her new sets of freedom -- financial autonomy and all the bells and whistles that come along with it, she becomes more rebellious. Her job also has a toll on her as well. Making more fatigued and less sexually active.




These are much an alpha would be willing to put up with for much longer and would naturally turn to younger, barely legal girls, freshly crossing the red gate of adolescent into green shoot adults. These freshies have minimal toxic exposure compared to their older female counterparts and would yield naturally to the male sheer power and dominance, making the alpha to dote on her. She becomes the objects of envy amongst her peers and older ladies alike.


Now, these old, financial independent women being pushed down from the perking order find themselves either as 2nd wives to way older men, or get entangled with a simp their age or become sugar mummies. Most end up getting married eventually but not to the men of their preference and are far more prone to engage in extramarital affairs.

I believe harlotry is for women who get paid for SE.x.Or do you intend your meaning generally for women who have random sex but have good paying jobs or those who are just prostitute? Speaking on the former,I argue that financial freedom in Nigeria in most cases are seen as an attribute for rebellion by women.Funny is how so many men on here cry about a broke cheating girlfriend.its kind of funny and I don't think cheating is same as submitting.

Not in all cases are grown women sexually inactive.Anyone who works hard physical and otherwise may have his/her game affected in a way, sometimes even considerably.There many instances where I just wanna _4ck to relieve the accumulated stress of work.Alas!My partner is snoring in the day after a night of office stress.So while one may be sleeping it off,the other may want to "_fuck" it off.So it depends...

[b]Now,this is not it!I think I disagree with this.Girls unfortunately want to grow big,you know when I was 15 all I do is watch Beyonce, Rihanna,try to wear my aunties stilettos and wigs,and red lipsticks and paint my god damn face.Sometimes I want to kiss a boyfriend and do things matured ladies do.So it may be that the younger girls envy the older,more independent ladies above their teens and more...Again,there are more younger guys, ofcourse I really don't know wtf is happening who look way matured than their age.Till date,I still find it difficult telling the face from the age.Many Nigeria guys will stand next to me and yet would pass for an elder brother or husband.I'm older than my partner,funny thing is he knew I was.He jokingly and spitefully told me more than 8 months into the relationship.For weeks I kept blinking my eyes in utter disbelief! What?!
So you see, I don't think there's any envy at all as long as preferences matters to individuals."Alpha" like you call yourselves don't think age.They play their game.A "small" girl can now slice throat better than an evening "newspaper".Street is a jungle,learn early,succeed early is the code.While the code for the late papers might be to settle and make babies,the younger wants to make money and abort babies.
[/b]


Young girls marry old men,it's as old as man.its not new,for financial gains, protection, religious cum cultural reasons and sometimes by choice.Even celebrities from well to do homes still get entangled with older men.Infact being a second or third wife is old fashion now trending...I guess the freedom to still have time to do other "things" while the Alpha feast on other wives shouldn't be underestimate or ignored.There many "unforseen' things going through the tiny brains of many Nigerian wives.Dont be surprised to read they think more about the future than the men.While the men work towards it,they solidify it to their own advantages.
Finally, you'd be surprised why women go into marriages.I don't think majority of Nigeria women marry for love right from the onset.It more often than not what is meritable and available.[/b]