In light of all what's been happening and from experiences,I am beginning to think our predecessors were right in always picking women way lower than them in the food chain for marriage or the homely ,younger ones to be complete housewives for sanity reasons.
All these independent women come with one barrage of problems or the other(my experiences).
Some of them are;
Too much experience.
Barrage of exes.Their exes no dey finish,everyday new name.
Age .Before a woman or any person can achieve stability,time don go well well.
They can actually do without you and in the long run,this becomes a big problem like it or not.That feeling of having someone need you?forget it with these set of women.(they already have mechanics,artisans and all contacts throughout their long years of being independent).
Prone to cheating.They've got jobs so it's easy for them to cheat on you with colleagues and associates and trust me,you'll never find out if she's good or don't want you to.
Highly opinionated,trust me you'll have a lot of clash of interests with them and confrontations,especially with the rude ones.
Pride. I need not say much about this but its real,they feel way above their heads most times.
Etc...
These are my observations, I'd love guys who've experienced different or similar circumstances to throw more light from their experiences so we can discuss about this .
What Compromises did you make for peace to reign and enjoy your union?
PS;Please all those rude kids with penchants for disrespecting women and insulting them should stay off this thread please,I am not in the mood for your shenanigans.

SeaTrade:
In light of all what's been happening and from experiences,I am beginning to think our predecessors were right in always picking women way lower than them in the food chain for marriage or the homely ,younger ones to be complete housewives for sanity reasons.
All these independent women come with one barrage of problems or the other(my experiences).
Some of them are;
Too much experience.
Barrage of exes.Their exes no dey finish,everyday new name.
Age .Before a woman or any person can achieve stability,time don go well well.
They can actually do without you and in the long run,this becomes a big problem like it or not.That feeling of having someone need you?forget it with these set of women.(they already have mechanics,artisans and all contacts throughout their long years of being independent).
Prone to cheating.They've got jobs so it's easy for them to cheat on you with colleagues and associates and trust me,you'll never find out if she's good or don't want you to.
Highly opinionated,trust me you'll have a lot of clash of interests with them and confrontations,especially with the rude ones.
Pride. I need not say much about this but its real,they feel way above their heads most times.
Etc...
These are my observations, I'd love guys who've experienced different or similar circumstances to throw more light from their experiences so we can discuss about this .
What Compromises did you make for peace to reign and enjoy your union?
PS;Please all those rude kids with penchants for disrespecting women and insulting them should stay off this thread please,I am not in the mood for your shenanigans.

By independent, do you mean career, business minded or both?

Your writeup seems to indict career minded women.

Raalsalghul:


By independent, do you mean career, business minded or both?

Your writeup seems to indict career minded women.

Career women.
From observations it seems women in business aren't as cocky as career ones.
And I'm not generalising,I know there are exceptions.

She can have both qualities; all I want is loyalty

SeaTrade:
Career women.
From observations it seems women in business aren't as cocky as career ones.
And I'm not generalising,I know there are exceptions.

Touché

There is something about business minded ladies that makes them humble especially having had transactions with people from all walks of life. They'll be the last to judge you based on education, diction or appearance knowing that you could be a potential customer. Hence, they are quite open and friendly even if they might not want to date you.

Raalsalghul:


Touché

There is something about business minded ladies that makes them humble especially having had transactions with people from all walks of life. They'll be the last to judge you based on education, diction or appearance knowing that you could be a potential customer. Hence, they are quite open and friendly.

True,have experienced this a lot.
The majority of classist people I know is mostly from corporate world.Both male and female.
Funny thing is the people that command and possess the real yardstick for classism are always the humble businessmen and women.
I think with abundance comes humility,people always make up for what they don't have by bringing up false standards and mouthing everyone else down.
Sad situation really.

SeaTrade:
True,have experienced this a lot.
The majority of classist people I know is mostly from corporate world.Both male and female.
Funny thing is the people that command and possess the real yardstick for classism are always the humble businessmen and women.
I think with abundance comes humility,people always make up for what they don't have by bringing up false standards and mouthing everyone else down.
Sad situation really.

Now that you've mentioned it, I think this classcism of a thing stems from lack of an open mind. I see such individuals as myopic.

I come from a corporate back ground too in maritime and having dealt with consignees, agents, shippers, haulage operators who are well loaded even with their lax appearance, I now know better than to judge individuals at first sight.

Having said that, I remember about four ladies at my former place of work who were single parents. This is me not saying all career minded ladies are bad but maybe who knows these set fit your postulations.

Raalsalghul:


Now that you've mentioned it, I think this classcism of a thing stems from lack of an open mind. I see such individuals as myopic.

I come from a corporate back ground too in maritime and having dealt with consignees, agents, shippers, haulage operators who are well loaded even with their lax appearance, I now know better than to judge individuals at first sight.

Having said that, I remember about four ladies at my former place of work who were single parents. This is me not saying all career minded ladies are bad but maybe who knows these set fit your postulations.

Yeah classism comes from being myopic and inexperienced.
The people who pull weights and make numbers happen most times don't look like the weight they pull cos honestly where's the time to do so?If they aren't occupied physically,then they are mentally.
So an inexperienced person will easily judge these people a certain way till it gets down to numbers and you now see who's boss.
It's a great mistake to judge a person's ability via superficiality in my experience.
Yeah that attitude that comes with women in that category most times leave them only to the option of being single mothers as very few men who can pull their own weights will want to have them as wives.
They'll want to date you and sleep with you for the fun and spice,but marriage?not really.
The set of men that'll be comfortable with that kind of settings are dependent men and these women don't want that,neither can they afford to keep dependent men.
So they just birth kids with no father figure and convince themselves that they're better off alone.

Women are not all that bad, though some are bad.. but you can have both homely and independent they are not that hard to find

INDEPENDENT. I MEAN FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT.

why would a man want to put unnecessary stress in his life, and NOT have a career woman to help towards the wellbeing of his family? no matter how a man looks at it, 2 salaries will always be better than one, for the family.

the catch is to make sure you dont settle for one lazy money hungry olosho... et voila!

MrBrownJay1:
why would a man want to put unnecessary stress in his life, and NOT have a career woman to help towards the wellbeing of his family? no matter how a man looks at it, 2 salaries will always be better than one, for the family.

the catch is to make sure you dont settle for one lazy money hungry olosho... et voila!

I was talking of men that can comfortably run a home without a woman's input.
You don't need a career woman because her contributions she will make to run the family will be insignificant to you,so much so that you can't let go of your sanity cos of it.

SeaTrade:
I was talking of men that can comfortably run a home without a woman's input.
You don't need a career woman because her contributions she will make to run the family will be insignificant to you,so much so that you can't let go of your sanity cos of it.

LOL. Is this why you've been running away from me? Cos I'm a successful career driven woman?

HRSweetness:


LOL. Is this why you've been running away from me? Cos I'm a successful career driven woman?

First off,I didn't runaway from you.We went pass small talks obviously, I think we were curious to know more of each other, I asked we talk on phone,you weren't sure about it,I could also not keep talking in public,then things got hard.
I didn't and still don't know what exactly it is you do,so there's no way I will run from you for being a succesful career lady.
And if you notice,I didn't say all career women are bad,was looking at things from my experiences and want to know from other people's experiences.

MrBrownJay1:
why would a man want to put unnecessary stress in his life, and NOT have a career woman to help towards the wellbeing of his family? no matter how a man looks at it, 2 salaries will always be better than one, for the family.

the catch is to make sure you dont settle for one lazy money hungry olosho... et voila!

How will a career woman help towards the wellbeing of your family.

Do you understand the meaning of a career woman?

a woman who is devoted to pursuing a professional career.

These type of women will emasculate you, once you don't meet up in terms of earning

SeaTrade:
First off,I didn't runaway from you.We went pass small talks obviously, I think we were curious to know more of each other, I asked we talk on phone,you weren't sure about it,I could also not keep talking in public,then things got hard.
I didn't and still don't know what exactly it is you do,so there's no way I will run from you for being a succesful career lady.
And if you notice,I didn't say all career women are bad,was looking at things from my experiences and want to know from other people's experiences.

Ahn ahn, small poke and you went off on me. just joking with you mahn

thebosstrevor1:


How will a career woman help towards the wellbeing of your family.

Do you understand the meaning of a career woman?

a woman who is devoted to pursuing a professional career.

These type of women will emasculate you, once you don't meet up in terms of earning

Not just earning sef,you can be making way more than her in earning but if you too aren't in that professional scheme of things,it becomes a problem.
You might have to deal with someone who makes a yardstick for being succesful as belonging in that professional career clique as hers and idolising and making a big deal out of professionals,leaving your efforts unappreciated and your true worth in the mud.

HRSweetness:


Ahn ahn, small poke and you went off on me. just joking with you mahn

I didn't go off on you,thought you asked a question and was just responding to what you asked.
I'm sorry if you feel that way.

SeaTrade:
I didn't go off on you,thought you asked a question and was just responding to what you asked.
I'm sorry if you feel that way.

not gonna derail your thread okay...

HRSweetness:


not gonna derail your thread okay...

SeaTrade:
Not just earning sef,you can be making way more than her in earning but if you too aren't in that professional scheme of things,it becomes a problem.
You might have to deal with someone who makes a yardstick for being succesful as belonging in that professional career clique as hers and idolising and making a big deal out of professionals,leaving your efforts unappreciated and your true worth in the mud.

You made some good point.

I think these type of women are so isolated from the real world that they think their professions are only what exist.

Not to bash them but that is my observation when interacting with these type of women.

thebosstrevor1:


You made some good point.

I think these type of women are so isolated from the real world that they think their professions are only what exist.

Not to bash them but that is my observation when interacting with these type of women.

Your observation is true,have some experiences on it.
Sometimes you subconsciously try to prove a point as the humans we are,then you realise its not worth the effort.
The only option left is to walk away.
Very few men will work hard through life only for you to come and look down on efforts and proceeds you can't even afford because of some professional clique BS.
This is usually where interests start to differ and the man starts leaning towards places where his efforts and achievements will be appreciated.

When I dey my ND,I usually go and visit my bros in his lodge ,most time I meet classy ladies and I tell him bros it's like u go marry this one o.he go smile,years later when he wanted to marry,na one fulani man we dey sell cow for bush daughter he marry,most independent ladies are not submissive,they argue with you on everything, even things they have no idea about.they hardly listen.Now that am grown and have alot of experiences I now understood why my bros left all those ladies to marry a fulani man daughter who he sponsored to school after he wifed her.very good woman.

if you like this video please subscribe to my YouTube channel as this will help me make more interesting videos like this thanks.




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDLs8RDCPpg




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKgKhoOEMG8

Aaaaarghmed:
When I dey my ND,I usually go and visit my bros in his lodge ,most time I meet classy ladies and I tell him bros it's like u go marry this one o.he go smile,years later when he wanted to marry,na one fulani man we dey sell cow for bush daughter he marry,most independent ladies are not submissive,they argue with you on everything, even things they have no idea about.they hardly listen.Now that am grown and have alot of experiences I now understood why my bros left all those ladies to marry a fulani man daughter who he sponsored to school after he wifed her.very good woman.

Why they argue and always want to be right is because they don't see how a man they're probably more educated than, have greater interactions and clique than courtesy her job,exposure,should have an opinion different from hers which seem to be better than hers Trust me they'll argue to they grave even though they know they're wrong.It gets worse when them get money pass you.You better accept their opinion as gospel.
Funny enough if it was someone they hold in high regard (probably in their social clique or class) that were to make sane argument/opinion as you,they'll quickly accept it.
All these things all boil down to how a person sees you.

HRSweetness:


LOL. Is this why you've been running away from me? Cos I'm a successful career driven woman?

If you are still in the market

I want to price you

Pls reply me ASAP

On a serious note

thebosstrevor1:
How will a career woman help towards the wellbeing of your family.
Do you understand the meaning of a career woman? a woman who is devoted to pursuing a professional career.

stop showing your insecurities online... just because you woman has a JOB/CAREER and brings money for the wellbeing of the family, doesnt automatically means she cant pursue her professional carrer and be a good mother.

These type of women will emasculate you, once you don't meet up in terms of earning

so what you are saying is that, A) you have such a misplaced ego that you'd rather that your family suffers (when you dont meet up "in terms of earning", than having a woman in your life that brings her own fair share to the family, B) you dont believe that 2 salaries is better than one for any family.... but most importantly C) you cant handle your woman and instead will be acting like a simp in front of a disrespectful woman?!?!? only simps get emasculated, a real man put this woman in her place or get rid of that deluded SHE-diot.

SeaTrade:
I was talking of men that can comfortably run a home without a woman's input.
You don't need a career woman because her contributions she will make to run the family will be insignificant to you,so much so that you can't let go of your sanity cos of it.

there is no such thing as a man who can safely run a home without the input of women.... you need women's input because even billionaires get broke. the fact that you would even want your woman at home doing nothing, being idle/useless, surprises me. i believe this is your own insecurity of having your wife around other men. you are so insecure that you'd rather she stays home hidden from the world, bringing nothing to the wellbeing of the family, just to satisfy your misplaced ego. come on bros, we are better than that! if thats how low you think of your wife, then you shouldnt marry this "obviously" useless woman.

here is a simple question to you: by the time your children starts going to nursery/school, what use is that woman at home idle by her damn self, if not to become an expert in Telemundo?!?!?

MrBrownJay1:


stop showing your insecurities online... just because you woman has a JOB/CAREER and brings money for the wellbeing of the family, doesnt automatically means she cant pursue her professional carrer and be a good mother.



so what you are saying is that, A) you have such a misplaced ego that you'd rather that your family suffers (when you dont meet up "in terms of earning", than having a woman in your life that brings her own fair share to the family, B) you dont believe that 2 salaries is better than one for any family.... but most importantly C) you cant handle your woman and instead will be acting like a simp in front of a disrespectful woman?!?!? only simps get emasculated, a real man put this woman in her place or get rid of that deluded SHE-diot.

i dont know the book you are reading that makes you seems confused.

you cant be a career woman and care about being a good mother, that is impossible, the idea that a woman can fully pursue her career and be a good mother doesn't exist, likewise the idea that a man can fully pursue his career and be a good father doesn't exist.

we see the effect in society in today in the form of emotionally abandoned children, who only see their mother or father at night.

i think, you are living in fantasy if you think a career woman who earns more than you will respect you. you are here talking about 2 salaries, you wont even see her salary when you marry her. true, not all career women are bad women, but there is a instinct in women not to take seriously a man who they earn more than, we see the effect in society, many men complaining and acting aggressive and insecure because their wives earn more than them.

your fantasy writeup is different from what happens in real life.