₦airaland Forum

Jaybull:
Which joy? Please

The joy of being yourself and finding comfort with your sexuality.

czarr:
You are asexual. You value emotional connection more.

I've never in my life viewed gay porn.
Alot of guys who are homosexuals started with curiosity about gay porn.

I have view it once immediately I started having painful headaches

christianjoy:
I have view it once immediately I started having painful headaches

people don't know but demons gain access to the mind through light and sound.

Watching gay porn, the spirit can access your mind.
That's why the bible says to guard you heart (mind) with all diligence, out of it are the issues of life.

czarr:
people don't know but demons gain access to the mind through light and sound.

Watching gay porn, the spirit can access your mind.
That's why the bible says to guard you heart (mind) with all diligence, out of it are the issues of life.

true

czarr:
people don't know but demons gain access to the mind through light and sound.

Watching gay porn, the spirit can access your mind.
That's why the bible says to guard you heart (mind) with all diligence, out of it are the issues of life.

Yes.

kriss2I6:
The joy of being yourself and finding comfort with your sexuality.

I hear. Are you finished? Thanks

Jaybull:
I hear. Are you finished? Thanks

All thanks to your mom.

kriss2I6:
It's not too late, kindly join the lgbtq community and experience joy.
No make anybody tell you otherwise.

you this stupid and miserable #gay. You No Get Shame ne?

Jaybull:
No please. It's wrong. I will die untimely. Many of the gays were assaulted as kids. It may lead to suicidal thoughts for me.
Please don't talk more. If I think about it, sometimes I want to puke.

dont take the advice of that one that is already wearing Pampers...he just wants u to be like it...

It is very wrong, say NO to it

Karleb:
Homosexuality has nothing to do being raped or exposure as a kid. I might be wrong tho but I strongly believe this.

Take for instance, in US where homosexuality is legal, where kids get to see gay couples kiss in the open, you'd expect that majority of the population will be gay but that's false, a lot of people are still straight, in fact, only few people are homosexuals compared to heterosexual.

In your own case, you've always had it in you.

The gay thing could be learnt tho but trust me, if you're not gay you cannot be gay. Even if you grow up in a place where you are the only straight person, you still wouldn't be gay or bi or any letter in the LGBTQ.

The worrying thing is, a lot of people don't know they are not straight, until they get exposed to gay content.

Wow.....is this really coming from you? We've both had convos on this forum about this very topic and your homophobia always showed......glad to see you evolved. The OP is obviously suffering from internalized homophobia,I hope he finds peace

Jaybull:
No. Do you know any gay. Just tell them to open up to you, if they can. They were introduced at one point or the other. I know people in boarding school introduced or exposed to it.
The number of homosexuals is high. You can't compare it to the entire population of US. The population is huge.

Dude.....go work on your internalized homophobia,you really need the therapy because the self hate you possess will be quite traumatic for you......I should know,a lot of queers have been there and it's not a place I pray for anyone to be in

Jaybull:
Bisexual? But I don't really want to have sex with any woman or man.
Does it mean am now non-binary or what?

It could mean you are a bisexual asexual......do you want sexless romantic relationships with both genders though?

This your story is not clear. You are attracted to fellow guys, you watch gay porn and you lust after gays. You've had encounters with gays. And you are telling us that you don't get involved in gay activities. This story doesn't add up.

Prosper123:
It could be true. He values emotional connection more. He may not be gay

Asexuals can also be gay,they can be gay, straight or bi so if he is...... he's a bisexual asexual......he prefers emotional and romantic relationships with both genders but not sex or he doesn't feel like sex is important for a relationship to thrive

Gkemz:
This your story is not clear. You are attracted to fellow guys, you watch gay porn and you lust after gays. You've had encounters with gays. And you are telling us that you don't get involved in gay activities. This story doesn't add up.

I don't have any other thing to hide here. Like I said have been lured into touching of my friend's male organ when I was 6 or 7 playfully, but we were aroused as kids while at it. I have also played with a girl at that same age. I have had people come to me not telling me they were gays, but I was able to dictate through their language and avoided them or become normal friends . Only one thought I was gay and wanted to initiate sexual relations with me and I refused him and preached to him, telling him something was wrong with him.
I can't even imagine myself having sexual relationship with any man. I have not, not even a woman. But I noticed I like men, boys. Handsome boys. I know that the gay porn is one of the factors of this likeness.

But I have been exposed to gay porns, even recently. Please take what I wrote as it is, if I continue to explain it, I will try to water down the story or give it another meaning. I wanted to discuss what has been happening to me without watering it down.

One person says I'm gay in need of triggers. I have had triggers. The boy I mentioned wanted to force himself on me to kiss me. If I think about it now, I feel like vomiting. I thank God it didn't occur. One had been telling me how he loved me. I just asked him if he was gay, he said no. He has not called me again.
Porn and masturbation had been trying to wreck my life. But gay porn. It's demonic. This is my worst regret in life.
I can't advise any to even try that out.

Flamemignon1:
Asexuals can also be gay,they can be gay, straight or bi so if he is...... he's a bisexual asexual......he prefers emotional and romantic relationships with both genders but not sex or he doesn't feel like sex is important for a relationship to thrive

Bi? Hmm.

It's not too late, kindly join the lgbtq community and experience joy.
No make anybody tell you otherwise.

Is This sarcasm?

Shedrack777:
where is orgasmgiver123 when you need him? your rain boot is needed here to correct some senses

Jaybull:
Bi? Hmm.

Not just bi but a bisexual asexual

Jaybull:
I don't think you have fasted half to what I have done. I even have ulcer now from fasting

You don't want to have sex with any woman?

Guy, just stop being a hypocrite

1. At 30 you are suppose to be sexually active with a woman, and by not doing so, masturbation became your optional.

2. The major problem is Pornography. You have used your own hands to bring troubles into your life via pornography.

3. You have become possessed with demons. Each time you watch pornography, you open the door for millions of pervert gay demons to enter you.

4. You have now become one step away from being a full time homosexual, but your keep fighting it.

5. If you don't get of this evil spirit out of your life, they will destroy you and also works on the life of your unborn children.

SOLUTION

1. Live a life of prayer. When the fire of prayer becomes too much in your life and body, they will leave your body and flee from you.

2. Repent and go for deliverance.

3. Do not quote me.

jantboy:
You don't want to have sex with any woman?

Guy, just stop being a hypocrite

1. At 30 you are suppose to be sexually active with a woman, and by not doing so, masturbation became your optional.

2. The major problem is Pornography. You have used your own hands to bring troubles into your life via pornography.

3. You have become possessed with demons. Each time you watch pornography, you open the door for millions of pervert gay demons to enter you.

4. You have now become one step away from being a full time homosexual, but your keep fighting it.

5. If you don't get of this evil spirit out of your life, they will destroy you and also works on the life of your unborn children.

SOLUTION

1. Live a life of prayer. When the fire of prayer becomes too much in your life and body, they will leave your body and flee from you.

2. Repent and go for deliverance.

3. Do not quote me.

Thank you
. You just made my day
If he will listen. Only Jesus saves

I understand your problem. I know someone with the same issue: he was naturally effeminate, he went to a boarding school where he had two or three homosexual encounters (but just dry humping nothing further), he struggled with porn addiction, gay porn and lusting after some other men. But he became a Christian with a serious ministry; he is still battling but everyday, he chooses to say no to his desires and yes to obeying God.
Now, answer honestly my questions:
- what made you effeminate? Is it because you naturally feel soft and not very manly or because at some point in your life, you wanted to be a woman and entertained the fantasy?
- are you ready to put all the sins behind you? No more looking a man twice, no more gay porn, no more flirting with boys....?
- when will you look for a woman after your heart and get married?

civboy:
I understand your problem. I know someone with the same issue: he was naturally effeminate, he went to a boarding school where he had two or three homosexual encounters (but just dry humping nothing further), he struggled with porn addiction, gay porn and lusting after some other men. But he became a Christian with a serious ministry; he is still battling but everyday, he chooses to say no to his desires and yes to obeying God.
Now, answer honestly my questions:
- what made you effeminate? Is it because you naturally feel soft and not very manly or because at some point in your life, you wanted to be a woman and entertained the fantasy?
- are you ready to put all the sins behind you? No more looking a man twice, no more gay porn, no more flirting with boys....?
- when will you look for a woman after your heart and get married?

What made me effeminate? Even though I can say I'm naturally quiet, soft spoken, always smiling, warm to be around and handsome, as some people (males and females) say, I have never wanted to be a woman. As I grew I noticed I have been more masculine in my voice and actions unlike when I was a kid. I don't walk or talk ike a girl.
And apart from the touching I did as a kid, I have not engaged in any sexual act with any man or woman, not that I fight not to. But I think sex is overrated or because of the addiction to masturbation and then trying to fight fornication as a Christian.

Am I ready to put all my sins behind me? No more looking at a boy twice or watching porn?

Yes. I know apart from my kid exposure that gay porn and masturbation are my major issues. I have started fighting those.
Not looking at boys twice? That, too. Though I feel warmer around boys. I have once told myself that I would prefer all boys as kids.
I just like everything about boys and men. The simplicity, the looks, everything.

I like how I have been open about this without sugar-coating it. I have started trying to look beyond physical appearance.

When will I get married? Not now, maybe in the next 5 years, I tell myself. Not because I hate women, but I think I'm not ready for family now. The responsibility that comes with family and the stress of handling a woman. And I take that raising a family now will limit my ambition

Homosexuality trait is extremely stubborn. To a great extent, I think it is natural. However, not everything we get from nature is desirable. We have natural disasters for instance.
From my studies, the only way is to live straight if you have gay tendencies is to build defense around it. Avoid the triggers. Expose yourself to straight things. If you are a Christian, stay with God. Gay spirit doesn't agree with God. So, staying with God or self discipline is recommended.

Do you know that Donnie Mclurkin admitted having the feeling till now?
This is why I don't condemn homosexuals except those that are enjoying the lifestyle.

Op God strengthen you more

The Op is gay, or maybe Bisexual living in denial. Best of luck bro.... but trust me, 1 million deliverance can't wish it away if you really are. I have seen people that have tried many things spiritually and yet nothing perfect happens. Best of luck and I wish you waht you wish yourself.

Jaybull:
I had to create this new account for this to avoid judgment. But what I will write here are all true.

For what it is worth, I'm a male, 30 years. I have noticed that I was a bit girlie, wore girls' clothes even in nursery 3 or so. Maybe I learned it from my sister who took care of me. I was also a bit handsome, gentle and soft spoken.

Few years ago in primary school, I guess I was like 6 or 7, I had two little sexual encounters. One with a fellow boy and the other with a girl.
I can't remember which came first. But I would go with the boy, first.
A boy much older than me, but still in his teens took me to an uncompleted building and he started playing and touching my male organ. I followed suit and we started touching each other's male organs while being aroused.
It was like the boy was known with that. How did I know? A lady passed by and looked through the window and saw us and told me I should never join the boy in his ways.

After that I have not had such an encounter again and I don't think I have said this to ears before in this way.
I also remember when I played with a small girl, my age mate, touching each other's organs. The family saw me and gave me a serious beating that day. But just like I said I can't remember the one that came first.

Fast forward to secondary school days, I went to boys boarding school. I heard about homosexuals in the school. I even knew one or two. Some thought that I was because of my nature. But the truth is that I was not. I had even been born again and was serious with God. More like a young pastor then.

Now during my university days, I continued with God and was even preaching. But somehow, I dabbled into masturbation, mistakenly. It was really the worst mistake of my life. My greatest regret till now.
I started growing in masturbation and later, pornography. I started watching porns, even gay porns and heterosexual ones.


I then noticed, I started getting attracted to males, though a preacher or a born again, if you don't mind. I was happy to see males naked and sometimes, I would even be aroused by it and then I would hide myself.

Then again, I noticed men started getting attracted to me. I believe some of them were gays.
I have never had sex with a man or woman in my 30 years of life. I don't even want to now, till I marry. But I am telling you what happened and what is happening.

This continued till it grew to the point that I would see a handsome boy and would admire or even lust after him. I was searching for handsome boys or men with my eyes. Though I admire beauty in girls, but it's more for boys or young men. I get easily carried away by fellow men. I easily like men than women. I would shout within myself and pray and rebuke the thoughts.
After a while it would stop and then start.

Recently, I should say this. I saw a young medical student. I immediately liked him from a far. I know he also liked me, but just as a young man who dresses well or just as a normal person.
I didn't like him for anything else, but because of that my nature of liking men more especially handsome boys. Again, the young boy was quiet and what have you.

Something happened, which I would like to share.




Continue later, I'm busy

Our stories and experience are just the same.
But I have accepted to be kind to myself in a rational way.

It's not too late, kindly join the lgbtq community and experience joy.
No make anybody tell you otherwise.

Did i just hear you say"experience joy" man that's disgusting.


I don't even know what you're thinking

Jaybull:
I had to create this new account for this to avoid judgment. But what I will write here are all true.

For what it is worth, I'm a male, 30 years. I have noticed that I was a bit girlie, wore girls' clothes even in nursery 3 or so. Maybe I learned it from my sister who took care of me. I was also a bit handsome, gentle and soft spoken.

Few years ago in primary school, I guess I was like 6 or 7, I had two little sexual encounters. One with a fellow boy and the other with a girl.
I can't remember which came first. But I would go with the boy, first.
A boy much older than me, but still in his teens took me to an uncompleted building and he started playing and touching my male organ. I followed suit and we started touching each other's male organs while being aroused.
It was like the boy was known with that. How did I know? A lady passed by and looked through the window and saw us and told me I should never join the boy in his ways.

After that I have not had such an encounter again and I don't think I have said this to ears before in this way.
I also remember when I played with a small girl, my age mate, touching each other's organs. The family saw me and gave me a serious beating that day. But just like I said I can't remember the one that came first.

Fast forward to secondary school days, I went to boys boarding school. I heard about homosexuals in the school. I even knew one or two. Some thought that I was because of my nature. But the truth is that I was not. I had even been born again and was serious with God. More like a young pastor then.

Now during my university days, I continued with God and was even preaching. But somehow, I dabbled into masturbation, mistakenly. It was really the worst mistake of my life. My greatest regret till now.
I started growing in masturbation and later, pornography. I started watching porns, even gay porns and heterosexual ones.


I then noticed, I started getting attracted to males, though a preacher or a born again, if you don't mind. I was happy to see males naked and sometimes, I would even be aroused by it and then I would hide myself.

Then again, I noticed men started getting attracted to me. I believe some of them were gays.
I have never had sex with a man or woman in my 30 years of life. I don't even want to now, till I marry. But I am telling you what happened and what is happening.

This continued till it grew to the point that I would see a handsome boy and would admire or even lust after him. I was searching for handsome boys or men with my eyes. Though I admire beauty in girls, but it's more for boys or young men. I get easily carried away by fellow men. I easily like men than women. I would shout within myself and pray and rebuke the thoughts.
After a while it would stop and then start.

Recently, I should say this. I saw a young medical student. I immediately liked him from a far. I know he also liked me, but just as a young man who dresses well or just as a normal person.
I didn't like him for anything else, but because of that my nature of liking men more especially handsome boys. Again, the young boy was quiet and what have you.

Something happened, which I would like to share.




Continue later, I'm busy

I think you should explore this further, the depths of your feelings and attraction so as to know your sexual orientation.

Live your truth.

DrFunmisticGlow:
I think you should explore this further, the depths of your feelings and attraction so as to know your sexual orientation.

Live your truth.

What other thing do you want me to write?
Speak on what I have written already. It was not easy confessing this. The flow and urge come, they do not come always. If I write when the urge to confess is not there, I tend to water down the message of the post and write things that may pass another message.
This is what I have written.

ntipro:
Homosexuality trait is extremely stubborn. To a great extent, I think it is natural. However, not everything we get from nature is desirable. We have natural disasters for instance.
From my studies, the only way is to live straight if you have gay tendencies is to build defense around it. Avoid the triggers. Expose yourself to straight things. If you are a Christian, stay with God. Gay spirit doesn't agree with God. So, staying with God or self discipline is recommended.

Do you know that Donnie Mclurkin admitted having the feeling till now?
This is why I don't condemn homosexuals except those that are enjoying the lifestyle.

Op God strengthen you more

OK.