₦airaland Forum

He ghosted you… he is still gonna call you… after you might have found someone else… he would talk you into sweet nothings you’d now have to choose between him and the new person… may God give you the wisdom to choose rightly

theres a simple way to get a clear picture simply visit his elder sister ( preferably a weekend and spend the day with her) not to discuss your thoughts with her. but to acertain her mood,her reception of you ,then look around for related signs of your boyfriend ie recent photos. something should pop up . then its left for you to get a clear context of what step to take.

again i was tempted to ask if he is a bini guy when you said he travelled to italy. something told me to check ur dm.i saw ur location was benin.hmmmmm i dont really know what to say. first is that if he had married you as planned last year or so. he was to take you with him or you remain in nigeria. i want to ask did you grow up in benin ,if you did ,do you want to tell me you are not aware of the arrangement asuch between these type of relationships . that it is like playing the game of russian roulette(find out about that game). if you planned marriage that means it is a family affair and some sort of communication must have occurred between his family and yours earlier on that.Has he come down to Nigeria on a visit at all ,if not when is he coming for a visit. how is the communication between him and his family .Well it all depends on what would occur. i grew up in benin and still pop in regularly and know whats up. i want to use my inner circle as a case study i have cousins who did travel out abroad a majority had serious girlfriends here at home whom they promised marriage sort off. to the extent that the girl friends used to visit our house regularly as per wifey. later as time went on the whole picture cleared these my cousins found there bearing there and of course established themselves and dumped the girlfriends with no apologies. one of course still was serious with his girl friend but made it know that the lady he was shacking up with was just tempoary for papers and he would still marry her and later he did . she stayed in nigeria for sometime before he took her out.So actually it is a big gamble and most of the time the girlfriends in nigeria get their fingers burnt and hearts broken. So you really have to weigh all options well from what i can conclude you are independent and dont have the mindset of depending on him for a meal. as most girls in benin hope on their boyfriends who travel out. if the foundation is based on love as you claim you are faithfull to him. then you have a right and say on the the relationship.He has no right to put ur mind on suspence. there has to be a concrete conclusion between you both . the onus still lies with you.best wishes

They told you somebody is in a relationship you are looking for proof. Oya keep waiting for proof.

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me prove)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

Aunty move on. Accept that you have just received your breakfast and move on. If he were yours he would have stayed faithful. Some of us also distance relationship for years and the relationship culminated in wedding. Next time don't be in a hurry to get emotionally or sexually attached to any man no matter how nice he seems. This is to ensure that when you discover he is not meant for you you can easily move on with little stress...

Klass99:
Mon ami na wao , which kind talk be this? It is clear Italy guy is no longer interested and he is using the silent treatment to end this relationship, which is more of a coward's way out.

@ Cyntiee55, long distance relationships are hard to maintain and they tend to wane with time (i.e. become weaker and fade away) kindly move on with your life.

To japa is not easy but a lot of people don't know this until they reach their destination. That guy may be squatting in a house with 10 other guys, unable to feed well and finding it hard to land a good job. If his japa was by illegal means that is double wahala for dead body.

okay sis, I hope you are fine

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

It's difficult for a man to stay with out having a woman to chat or call on, so when he says he is busy, it could be one of it

There is nothing wrong in telling his sister how you have been lonely and worried about him nit communicating with you and to you especially when he doesn't respond to you, yet he is only

If after your visit to his sister and there are no changes, just prepare yourself to move on

If something you have been holding doesn't belong to you, you have to drop it because it will still go back to the owner

All thses abroad guys, once they go abroad, there is slim chances of him keeping to his promise especially when it comes to marriage

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

you never see something yet, me wey like u dey ask u out u dey do shakara for me.

See as u fine dey allow one boy dey give u un necessary headache. I'm a guy and let me just tell you the truth. When a guy begins to give you the silent treatment just know that he's not really into you anymore and is obviously tired of the r/ship. Like a guy can't claim to love you and ignore your messages, regardless of how busy he may be. He's just hoping you decode the message he's trying to tell you. Not like you haven't understood the message, but you've just decided not to accept the stack reality. I just suggest you move on. You don't need to fight for love.What's meant for you would definitely come to you. Now move on baby girl. Wish you the very best. You deserve better

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

I know it is hurtful, but please move on! You have been ghosted...Don't put your life on hold because of someone that does not send you... Life is moving fast and you will meet much better person. Even if he comes back tomorrow, it this the kind of person you want to associate with? Someone that can disappear at any time??

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

atleast now we know thats not u in ur profile else he wont wanna stop chatting with u.

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

I see no furture in sight between both of u. Just move on..

BTW

Are you from Benin?

Seems he is up to something but don't just assume. Call him and discuss with him one on one. Tell him how you really feel and let him if he doesn't come open you will have no choice but to move on.

For me with experience both sides, he is likely to have got someone else. Such is really needed for people who want to settle down with a visa. You should send a last message to him that if he does not respond you will move on and assume he is no more interested.

Desperation

pocohantas:
Hear what from him? Same person that is not responding to messages or picking calls? Is she telepathic to know what is on his mind? Abeg!

@ your signature though....for real?

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

Don't bother going anywhere. It may be difficult bkos so much have been invested and marriage was in view, but if two of you havent plan anything by now for a marriage that should happen this month. Do you think anything is working at the moment?

It takes two people to make a relationship work. Move on, simple.

That's why I have a big reservation for long distance relationships.

You already know the answer my dear, you don’t expect to hear it from us.

Well, I feel your pain but it’s what it is darling

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

Start avoiding him to... No time. Love ko love ni.

My dear sister, he must have moved on.

You need to use ur head cos that dude has already chosen his path, though, he feels guilty and not bold enough to tell you about his decision.

You're in the right direction to meet with his elder sister just to keep a member of his family abreast of the situation at hand but if I may ask.

Has he brought his family to know ur family?
If your answer is No, then you need to decide what you want.

After your meeting with his sister, my dear sister kindly move on up with ur life cos distance relationship no bi here oo.

More so, the dude need paper to become a legit guy in a foreign land, he may have found a way out & communicating with you may damage his hard earned ambition.
Therefore, move on with your life.

Im also single and searching, we cud make a match.
We can communicate on 07018780226

He might be going through a difficult time in the diaspora. Move on with your life cause your happiness matters.

I know you would have moved on if he’s a hustler in Nigeria, but the fact that he’s an abroad based nigga has tampered your judgement. Follow your brain, not your heart.

God1000:
Maybe things aren't okay for him over there now, but avoiding you isn't right

Exactly, baba is going through a lot of stress he can't talk about. Abroad is hard ooh.

pocohantas:
A carpenter in Nigeria might end up making you feel more loved and cherished, but you would never know until you heal and try again.

Carpenter? Odiegwu!

If you've not been cheating on him, I think you need to move on with your life since no change is forth coming. It's actually pointless chasing a dead horse. In your text, what do you mean by "I was faithful to him?"
Are you tired of being faithful or used to be faithful to him?

Move on

Even though we have not had his side of the story
Try calling him one more time. Or drop a massage for him about the points you just drop for us. And then ask him a simple question at the end of your conversion.
"Should I move on"
Anything he says weigh it and work by it. If he doesn't give a direct answer. It means 'yes'
Don't be afraid of loosing, its better you face him now and loose than for you to loose later.

Omo if na u dey ur dp ..then u dey waste ur beauty waiting for on Italian bobo...see as you fine