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8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker - Career (2) - Nairaland

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Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by latyph(m): 12:42pm On May 23, 2022
Mystery2020:
1. Extraversion
You must be an extrovert, period. The Nigerian banking industry has zero tolerance for non-outgoing personality types. If you are not, make sure you are well connected both within and without.

2. Small talk
You must like small talks and gossips, and actively engage in them. Otherwise you yourself will become the subject of gossips by your colleagues and it will be difficult for you to change the narrative.

3. Flirty
This is very important especially if you are male. The women in this industry, both married and single are sex-starved and they always appreciate men that have regular erections. The last thing you want is for all the ladies in your office to gang up against you.
As a lady, you must be ready to receive anything from a hug, hands on your waist, neck or shoulder, to a kiss, even dick.

1, 2 & 3 are very important to avoid being tagged "lifeless". Once you have this tag, everything you do will be irritating to your boss and coworkers.

4. A$$ Licking
The industry is like a mafia. You must constantly show your loyalty and assure your colleagues and superiors of your loyalty, otherwise they will see you as arrogant and will begin to plot your dismissal.

5. Toxicity
Banking has one of the highest toxicity scores according to the Nairaland Toxicity Index: https://www.nairaland.com/7103678/toxicity-score-various-occupations-sectors
You must be a toxic person, and must regularly dish out you venom to both colleagues and subordinates. Else, you will not survive.
Bankers are like sharks who can smell blood hundreds of miles away. Your inability to dish out your toxins will give the rest of your coworkers a signal that you can be preyed upon, which they shall surely do.

6. Political Correctness
Your opinions have to be in sync with those of your colleagues. You must always agree with the majority publicly, but you can express your disagreement in private with 1 or 2 colleagues.

7. Team Work
Team work is useful only for those in operations (branch or elsewhere). Forget it if you are in sales (marketing). Here, everyone is on their own, it is dog eat dog!

8. Relationship with surbodinates
The banking industry is a frat house. Avoid relating with security men and cleaners if you want to climb the corporate ladder fast. The exception here are female cleaners; you may service them occasionally.


This is nothing but thrash you wrote here

Is it all departments that involves being outgoing in a bank? It is only the marketing unit that requires that. Are you telling me that the operations people that you see their faces in the banking hall requires you to be out going and extroverted? or the IT guys at the bck end, the internal control guys or the compliance guys.

7 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Dagenius53: 12:43pm On May 23, 2022
Mystery2020:
1. Extraversion
You must be an extrovert, period. The Nigerian banking industry has zero tolerance for non-outgoing personality types. If you are not, make sure you are well connected both within and without.

2. Small talk
You must like small talks and gossips, and actively engage in them. Otherwise you yourself will become the subject of gossips by your colleagues and it will be difficult for you to change the narrative.

3. Flirty
This is very important especially if you are male. The women in this industry, both married and single are sex-starved and they always appreciate men that have regular erections. The last thing you want is for all the ladies in your office to gang up against you.
As a lady, you must be ready to receive anything from a hug, hands on your waist, neck or shoulder, to a kiss, even dick.

1, 2 & 3 are very important to avoid being tagged "lifeless". Once you have this tag, everything you do will be irritating to your boss and coworkers.

4. A$$ Licking
The industry is like a mafia. You must constantly show your loyalty and assure your colleagues and superiors of your loyalty, otherwise they will see you as arrogant and will begin to plot your dismissal.

5. Toxicity
Banking has one of the highest toxicity scores according to the Nairaland Toxicity Index: https://www.nairaland.com/7103678/toxicity-score-various-occupations-sectors
You must be a toxic person, and must regularly dish out you venom to both colleagues and subordinates. Else, you will not survive.
Bankers are like sharks who can smell blood hundreds of miles away. Your inability to dish out your toxins will give the rest of your coworkers a signal that you can be preyed upon, which they shall surely do.

6. Political Correctness
Your opinions have to be in sync with those of your colleagues. You must always agree with the majority publicly, but you can express your disagreement in private with 1 or 2 colleagues.

7. Team Work
Team work is useful only for those in operations (branch or elsewhere). Forget it if you are in sales (marketing). Here, everyone is on their own, it is dog eat dog!

8. Relationship with surbodinates
The banking industry is a frat house. Avoid relating with security men and cleaners if you want to climb the corporate ladder fast. The exception here are female cleaners; you may service them occasionally.
I need a banking job please. Please connect me
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by JONNYSPUTE(m): 12:43pm On May 23, 2022
.... See talk
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by LaconicINC: 12:43pm On May 23, 2022
This op na confirmed weyrey
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by SUGARCyprian247: 12:46pm On May 23, 2022
Wahala
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by nesgeeek(m): 12:48pm On May 23, 2022
Corruption is everywhere in this country.
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by chatinent: 12:51pm On May 23, 2022
So much nagatives in this post. I'm outta here.
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Slynation(m): 12:55pm On May 23, 2022
In a banking sector...You will have less timing for 80% of this write up above

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by ibergng: 12:55pm On May 23, 2022
This opinion says a lot about the writers state of mind and work environment.
Secondly, the writer is undergoing a process and can do better in the future…

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by blackfase(m): 12:56pm On May 23, 2022
Mystery2020:

[b]8. Relationship with surbodinates

The banking industry is a frat house. Avoid relating with security men and cleaners if you want to climb the corporate ladder fast. The exception here are female cleaners; you may service them occasionally.
grin cheesy grin grin This guy na complete wan.ker, @ the bolded grin grin cheesy cheesy wink wink
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Lamanii22(f): 12:57pm On May 23, 2022
nosagold:
Jesus is ALL we need
I totally agree with you

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Havertz10: 12:57pm On May 23, 2022
Really said if these are some unspoken realities
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by EMIOMOADEOYE: 12:58pm On May 23, 2022
Mystery2020:
1. Extraversion
You must be an extrovert, period. The Nigerian banking industry has zero tolerance for non-outgoing personality types. If you are not, make sure you are well connected both within and without.

2. Small talk
You must like small talks and gossips, and actively engage in them. Otherwise you yourself will become the subject of gossips by your colleagues and it will be difficult for you to change the narrative.

3. Flirty
This is very important especially if you are male. The women in this industry, both married and single are sex-starved and they always appreciate men that have regular erections. The last thing you want is for all the ladies in your office to gang up against you.
As a lady, you must be ready to receive anything from a hug, hands on your waist, neck or shoulder, to a kiss, even dick.

1, 2 & 3 are very important to avoid being tagged "lifeless". Once you have this tag, everything you do will be irritating to your boss and coworkers.

4. A$$ Licking
The industry is like a mafia. You must constantly show your loyalty and assure your colleagues and superiors of your loyalty, otherwise they will see you as arrogant and will begin to plot your dismissal.

5. Toxicity
Banking has one of the highest toxicity scores according to the Nairaland Toxicity Index: https://www.nairaland.com/7103678/toxicity-score-various-occupations-sectors
You must be a toxic person, and must regularly dish out you venom to both colleagues and subordinates. Else, you will not survive.
Bankers are like sharks who can smell blood hundreds of miles away. Your inability to dish out your toxins will give the rest of your coworkers a signal that you can be preyed upon, which they shall surely do.

6. Political Correctness
Your opinions have to be in sync with those of your colleagues. You must always agree with the majority publicly, but you can express your disagreement in private with 1 or 2 colleagues.

7. Team Work
Team work is useful only for those in operations (branch or elsewhere). Forget it if you are in sales (marketing). Here, everyone is on their own, it is dog eat dog!

8. Relationship with surbodinates
The banking industry is a frat house. Avoid relating with security men and cleaners if you want to climb the corporate ladder fast. The exception here are female cleaners; you may service them occasionally.

Did you say service female cleaners.

Dayum.....you are really one toxic piece of sh*t.
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by ImaIma1(f): 1:01pm On May 23, 2022
Mystery2020:
1. Extraversion
You must be an extrovert, period. The Nigerian banking industry has zero tolerance for non-outgoing personality types. If you are not, make sure you are well connected both within and without.

2. Small talk
You must like small talks and gossips, and actively engage in them. Otherwise you yourself will become the subject of gossips by your colleagues and it will be difficult for you to change the narrative.

3. Flirty
This is very important especially if you are male. The women in this industry, both married and single are sex-starved and they always appreciate men that have regular erections. The last thing you want is for all the ladies in your office to gang up against you.
As a lady, you must be ready to receive anything from a hug, hands on your waist, neck or shoulder, to a kiss, even dick.

1, 2 & 3 are very important to avoid being tagged "lifeless". Once you have this tag, everything you do will be irritating to your boss and coworkers.

4. A$$ Licking
The industry is like a mafia. You must constantly show your loyalty and assure your colleagues and superiors of your loyalty, otherwise they will see you as arrogant and will begin to plot your dismissal.

5. Toxicity
Banking has one of the highest toxicity scores according to the Nairaland Toxicity Index: https://www.nairaland.com/7103678/toxicity-score-various-occupations-sectors
You must be a toxic person, and must regularly dish out you venom to both colleagues and subordinates. Else, you will not survive.
Bankers are like sharks who can smell blood hundreds of miles away. Your inability to dish out your toxins will give the rest of your coworkers a signal that you can be preyed upon, which they shall surely do.

6. Political Correctness
Your opinions have to be in sync with those of your colleagues. You must always agree with the majority publicly, but you can express your disagreement in private with 1 or 2 colleagues.

7. Team Work
Team work is useful only for those in operations (branch or elsewhere). Forget it if you are in sales (marketing). Here, everyone is on their own, it is dog eat dog!

8. Relationship with surbodinates
The banking industry is a frat house. Avoid relating with security men and cleaners if you want to climb the corporate ladder fast. The exception here are female cleaners; you may service them occasionally.


Fallacious writeup.

Not all units require you to be an extrovert.

Small talk is your choice. Who will gossip about you will still do.

Relationship with subordinate affects and changes nothing.

This writeup is a misinformation.

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by slydog(m): 1:17pm On May 23, 2022
All these are true especially for marketing in banks to the extent that u may have a manager interfering in relationships between you and your spouse or parents as the case maybe.
My friend who left Polaris Bank recently sent a mail to the MD informing him of all these kinda shit

2 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Biggerbros234: 1:27pm On May 23, 2022
pocohantas:
Which bank did/do you work? And what unit? It should be shut down for starters @ flirty and toxicity.
Hi pocohantas. Please do you have any resource or crash course on how to do lead generation for a particular location. I would love to contact you on how to go about it.
Please it is urgent
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Sheuns(m): 1:27pm On May 23, 2022
As silly and stupid as this sounds, these shit go on in most banks if not all. I don’t work there but I’ve been opportune to know some people that work there and this is what goes on. The sexual part is 100% true, most bankers female especially would have one time or the other been stylishly or told straight by either a colleague or a superior that he’ll like to knack her. If una like make una deny, it’s 100% true.

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by barnny(m): 1:31pm On May 23, 2022
Kind of true. As a banker I can relate...

2 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by bigcover(m): 1:32pm On May 23, 2022
This post is grossly misleading
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by R2bees2: 1:38pm On May 23, 2022
.
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by ppogba: 1:39pm On May 23, 2022
nkemoma:
The earlier you get out of any system that places your line managers as a demigod in your career and life, the better for you!!!

Na only Afonjas sabi play the game of ass kissing and balls licking


They learnt it from Nnamdi Azikiwe.
Contact your parents for fuller details.
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by nkemoma(m): 1:41pm On May 23, 2022
ppogba:



They learnt it from Nnamdi Azikiwe.
Contact your parents for fuller details.


Walahi... We always knew Nnamdi was of Afonja Descent.

A man that no one knows his father, mother or siblings
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Afodot0022(m): 1:46pm On May 23, 2022
Which kin useless talk be dis... Am a banker but all this are just trash. Op pls get sense
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by pocohantas(f): 1:59pm On May 23, 2022
Biggerbros234:

Hi pocohantas. Please do you have any resource or crash course on how to do lead generation for a particular location. I would love to contact you on how to go about it.
Please it is urgent

Hello,

No I don’t. I am not into lead generation. Maybe Google can help. smiley
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Jayslyder: 2:03pm On May 23, 2022
So in plain words..you're saying be an hypocrite??

I am a banker and the only relative useful information here is being an extrovert and this doesn't even necessarily count cos u used the word in the wrong context..I think the word u should have used is social

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by Biggerbros234: 2:13pm On May 23, 2022
pocohantas:


Hello,

No I don’t. I am not into lead generation. Maybe Google can help. smiley
Ok. Thank you .
I enjoyed your speech at the good meet yesterday
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by NaijaCars4sale: 2:24pm On May 23, 2022
Very enlightening write-up

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by wdacharley(m): 2:27pm On May 23, 2022
Exactly bro
Maverick777:
With exception of 1,4 and 7, all other items you stated here are total gibberish.
You and your likes should desist from misleading the public by spreading false information, especially on issues you know next to nothing about, please be guided!
it's not a must to create a thread!
Re: 8 Things You Need To Survive As A Banker by esthel(f): 2:34pm On May 23, 2022
Why should anyone do No 8, I hope OP is being sarcastic

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