₦airaland Forum

Stormtrooper11:
You dey date for this economy?! You suppose dey EFCC net.

feranmi888:
No be everybody be broke ass, go get a job or a paying hustle.

Klass99:
I think she is crushing beyond safe levels though. Her interest in Kunle has gone beyond secret admirer mode to something else. Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaketh

IceColdVeins:
Perhaps you need to set a more explicit trap for her or something. Catching her red-handed might be the only way out.

As for me, I’ve got no chills, I’d have sent her packing the very moment my instinct caught her.

JovialJune:
I actually see her as being a curious cat, wanting to know everything about her crush, and since he is close by, makes it obvious for Op to notice her countenance and demeanor of Kunle, I may be wrong though.

feranmi888:
Hi guys,

Them sey nobody wise pass, and for this life, you can never be too certain of surprises why am posting this for the soji guys and ladies. So I have been dating this
girl for close to two years now, apparently the most loyal I have ever dated. I stay in a 3 bed apartment where I housed two of my colleagues who work for me, one of them who
is my age mate, and then his younger brother who is light years behind us.

In the last several months, my girl used to come to the house, whe she comes, the young guy goes to open gate for her, and when I need to get something bought, he's the one
I normally send on errand. One day, she said I like this Kunle guy, I said why, she said she likes her personality, that he;s humble and calm headed, I was like yea thats true.

Over time, and once in a while, I figured out she normally heap great personality praises on the boy, and I concur without thinking otherwise,not until of recent when I had issues with his senior, and I started
planning on how to discharge the elder brother, cos he already stared messing up, she heard when I was complaining and plan kicking him out, and that if I kic him out, hes younger brother would have to follow him,she responded in a sad tone that, awwww I should not send kunle away oo if am to send his brother away I should try to retain him. I was like oh well I cant as long as the brother is going he also would have to follow him. That didnt even start to make me feel she probably has some sort of intimate feelings for him until 4 days ago, the curtain in the room was shifted aside a bit which could make anyoen from the backyard see through to the bathroom, while she was in the bathroom, I figured out the curtain shifted, so I told her to always close the bathroom door just in case the curtain opens to avoid any of them seeing her nudity from the backyard, she replied saying she would prefer kunle to see her bum instead of her brother, GBAM that was when It triggered that it may be beyond what i was thinking before oo, seems this my gf likeness for him is beyond just his personality. That very night we had some not too serious argument, and I was like if u wont maintain peace, maybe I should go drop you at home, she was like no oo, if I dont want her in my room she would rather sleep in Kunles room. That was when I snapped that woman you are beginning to disrespect me with my younger one, that I would you like that I start using your younger sisters big bum as point of my attraction to disrespect you, she was like no oo, she's just joking and bla bla bla.

2 days ago, called me on the phone that his babe will arrive from UK that he wants to let me know that she will be coming to our place, I was like no P, she asked who I was talking tom I was like KUNLE, she asked what he was saying, I told her, and immediately I figured out sheh wanted to know more, by so doing, I Formulated a story about him just to see how attentive she would be, I formed a story about how a girl came to look for him and his brother and myself went to smoke at the backyard which was right to the kunles room window, that as we were smoking, we started hearing the girl yell and he kept firing for hours, at that moment, she was so attentive and that gave her away that its more than what I thinking since oo. Then this morning, his brother called me that he wan stroll out oo, sey the girl wey just come back from jand wan kill her brother, cos their room is close to each other, said noise of kpakam kpakam is too much, because I was on speaker, I looked left, omo see the way my gf was looking so attentive, she now used style to ask me who was talking, I said Tunde, she acted like she didnt hear what we both were talking about, and asked what he was saying, I said he was complaining about kunle and how he has been slamming the girl for hours sey their noise dey disturb am him wans troll out, my gf wey we dey watch tv together just turned her head around and went into thinking mode, not too sure if that was what she was thinking about, but her movement and the timing made it seem like that.

So guys, do yall think shes having intimate feelings for this boy? Or could she be doing it intentionally, should i be on the watch?

JovialJune:
I actually see her as being a curious cat, wanting to know everything about her crush, and since he is close by, makes it obvious for Op to notice her countenance and demeanor of Kunle, I may be wrong though.

Munzy14:
You are making excuses for OP's girl..

She is crushing on kunle....Women hide every thing, but not about that crush...The butterflies will keep moving in her at the mention of the crush's name.

I won't blame her, OP seems to be a bossy nature, it is not bad if she begins to crush on a humble and easy going guy...Coupled with the fact, staying with someone over time, allows feelings to develope gradually.

satandeterrible:
Bro, the honest truth is that it is not just a 'silly crush' as some people are suggesting here.
She has fallen so deep for the Kunle of a guy.

I'll tell you without mincing words that she'll gladly fuk the Kunle guy if he so much as shows a little interest in her. She probably even masturbates with a mental picture of him.

Anybody in a relationship who develops a crush on another person should work towards killing it. But in your case, not only has she not worked on it, she has fed it and it has probably grown too big, being control.

You sound like you're soft on her.
Now let me tell you this, since you've failed to sternly correct her, she'll soon begin to despise your weakness and it'll only fuel her attraction towards Kunle or maybe some other guys out there.

I honestly don't see that relationship lasting for much longer.
I think you've exhibited weakness and women despise weakness in men. You didn't sternly warn her, you didn't make it clear that if she ever talks about Kunle again, she'll have an axe to grind with you.
Imagine if you were the one crushing on a girl and did all of the things she has done, she'd have raised hell.

Prepare for breakfast my gee. It is coming onto you and its inevitable.
The only way out might be relieving that Kunle guy and his bro of duty. But that's bullshit. A guy shouldn't lose his job because of the looseness of your so-called girlfriend.

Solution: Do the breakup yourself.
If I were you, I'd make it clear to her in no uncertain terms that she's playing with fire and you'll no longer tolerate that. I'll make it very clear that if she continues to show such attraction towards Kunle, that will be the end of our relationship.
After telling her this, you'll have to be prepared to execute the action without flinching.
You must show no more weakness. If she's not ready to change, breakup with her and let her go.
If you don't, she'll only continue to despise you.

And if Kunle is that kind of guy, he'll soon be fuking your hoe behind your back.

Let that bitch go.

feranmi888:
Hi guys,

Them sey nobody wise pass, and for this life, you can never be too certain of surprises why am posting this for the soji guys and ladies. So I have been dating this
girl for close to two years now, apparently the most loyal I have ever dated. I stay in a 3 bed apartment where I housed two of my colleagues who work for me, one of them who
is my age mate, and then his younger brother who is light years behind us.

In the last several months, my girl used to come to the house, whe she comes, the young guy goes to open gate for her, and when I need to get something bought, he's the one
I normally send on errand. One day, she said I like this Kunle guy, I said why, she said she likes her personality, that he;s humble and calm headed, I was like yea thats true.

Over time, and once in a while, I figured out she normally heap great personality praises on the boy, and I concur without thinking otherwise,not until of recent when I had issues with his senior, and I started
planning on how to discharge the elder brother, cos he already stared messing up, she heard when I was complaining and plan kicking him out, and that if I kic him out, hes younger brother would have to follow him,she responded in a sad tone that, awwww I should not send kunle away oo if am to send his brother away I should try to retain him. I was like oh well I cant as long as the brother is going he also would have to follow him. That didnt even start to make me feel she probably has some sort of intimate feelings for him until 4 days ago, the curtain in the room was shifted aside a bit which could make anyoen from the backyard see through to the bathroom, while she was in the bathroom, I figured out the curtain shifted, so I told her to always close the bathroom door just in case the curtain opens to avoid any of them seeing her nudity from the backyard, she replied saying she would prefer kunle to see her bum instead of her brother, GBAM that was when It triggered that it may be beyond what i was thinking before oo, seems this my gf likeness for him is beyond just his personality. That very night we had some not too serious argument, and I was like if u wont maintain peace, maybe I should go drop you at home, she was like no oo, if I dont want her in my room she would rather sleep in Kunles room. That was when I snapped that woman you are beginning to disrespect me with my younger one, that I would you like that I start using your younger sisters big bum as point of my attraction to disrespect you, she was like no oo, she's just joking and bla bla bla.

2 days ago, called me on the phone that his babe will arrive from UK that he wants to let me know that she will be coming to our place, I was like no P, she asked who I was talking tom I was like KUNLE, she asked what he was saying, I told her, and immediately I figured out sheh wanted to know more, by so doing, I Formulated a story about him just to see how attentive she would be, I formed a story about how a girl came to look for him and his brother and myself went to smoke at the backyard which was right to the kunles room window, that as we were smoking, we started hearing the girl yell and he kept firing for hours, at that moment, she was so attentive and that gave her away that its more than what I thinking since oo. Then this morning, his brother called me that he wan stroll out oo, sey the girl wey just come back from jand wan kill her brother, cos their room is close to each other, said noise of kpakam kpakam is too much, because I was on speaker, I looked left, omo see the way my gf was looking so attentive, she now used style to ask me who was talking, I said Tunde, she acted like she didnt hear what we both were talking about, and asked what he was saying, I said he was complaining about kunle and how he has been slamming the girl for hours sey their noise dey disturb am him wans troll out, my gf wey we dey watch tv together just turned her head around and went into thinking mode, not too sure if that was what she was thinking about, but her movement and the timing made it seem like that.

So guys, do yall think shes having intimate feelings for this boy? Or could she be doing it intentionally, should i be on the watch?

feranmi888:
Bro I pretty much understand your points, am glad I could pick one or two things thereabout. The most confusing aspect of all this is that she's this kind that respects me alot not to even talk or showcase her crush indirectly in my presence, I have been trying to analyze reasons why she's now changed and doing totally the opposite. It was when she actually said that she will go sleep in his room was when I flared up and sternly warn her about disrespecting me, but I didnt want to give a deliberately or a penalty warning like " the next time you ever mention or make remark about him, you will have to find yourself another relationship" because if i do that she might pretentiously stop but still be exhibit the traits in her mind, i want her to continue to spew more so I can have a valid reason to THROW her out of my life.

satandeterrible:
Lol. Imagine the stupid word. "Curious cat"
No be only curious cat, na curious pussy.

That girl doesn't respect the OP. That's why she's openly showing her affection towards Kunle. That disrespect will turn into hate.
She'll continue to crush on Kunle and if ever an opportunity arises that only she and Kunle are in the house, sex must happen. Or at least she'll try her possible best to seduce Kunle.

It is obvious to even the blind that the girl doesn't respect the OP, is no longer attracted to him and doesn't have much interest in the relationship any longer.

frozen70:
I think she likes and loves kunle but was waiting for him to make the move of which she may agree

But kunle understands her body language and will avoid anything that will bring issues with you and kunle

Don't be surprise after this period that kunle babe us around, she will change am for kunle and look for one excuse for you to exit kunle

That's when you will understand her games

satandeterrible:
See bro, you can't actually stop a woman from cheating is she so desires.
For a man, it is always important to set boundaries for the woman/women in your life.
Always be straight forward in stating the things you accept and the things you don't.

Women constantly shit-test men, sometimes even subconsciously (they do not even know wine they do it). When you continuously fail a woman's shit tests, she begins to despise you, she begins to question her attraction to you, and - in your case - her attraction towards Kunle continues to grow.

Perhaps you've given her the impression that you badly need her? You've given her the impression that she's your world? You've given her the impression that you can't replace her?
Whatever the case is, it is clear that she is not afraid of your relationship with her coming to an end. She's not afraid to lose you.

You must be clear about your likes and dislikes. You must be clear about boundaries. You must be resolute in punishing, when your boundaries and redlines are crossed. That's the way with women.
With women, the way up is the way down.
If she's not afraid to lose you, then you've already lost her.

You must now be clear with her. State your dislike about how she crushes on the Kunle of a guy. Make sure she understands that the relationship will end if she continues.
You don't need to be overly serious while telling her this. But make sure she understands that you're not joking and you'll carry out your promises.

Either way, prepare for breakfast. Perhaps she has been influenced by bad friends, just immature or you've severally failed her shit tests.

Try to be the one to break up with her first.

feranmi888:
My brother, the relationship is a complicated one, I have broken up with her like 4 times. The first one landed her in the hospital, second got her emotionally drained that her sisters had to be calling me. 3rd one she almost used her blood to swear that she has never cheated on me to prove innocence, 4th, we met at a restaurant and by the time I told her it was done, it was rush of tears that I had to reconcile with her the next day. Truth is, I love her, and beyond every reasonable doubt, ever since have been dating shes the best so far, she nor wan leave me, yet she suddenly started displaying this acts, though if u see from my initial write up, shes been saying she likes him since last year oo, i nor even reason am go that side, and there are times when i wont sleep in that house leave her in the room while kunle and his brother are in their own rooms, who knows if the guy don dey kpansh am since, cos that yesterday surprise me as i dey tell kunle sey make him buy blood tonic, her mood changed, and went into thinking mode, omo that shit go me internally mad.

mariahAngel:
Op, the truth is your babe has lost interest in YOU. No need for long tory!

satandeterrible:
Guy, women are fickle. Very FICKLE.
That you broke up with her serveral times and still made up is even a sign that you are weak. Thatbis what she assumes in her subconscious and she believes she'll always get you back anytime you break up with her. So she's not afraid of losing uih. Instead she'll be the one to break up with you once she has drained you up.

My guy, with women sometimes forgiveness is a sin. You can't be breaking up and making up that many times. She's has lost the intrigue, the mystery in you. She's looking out for another source of roller-coaster ride, another challenge.

Always take decisions that'll be in your very best interest. Women are machiavellian and don't hesitate to take descions in their very own best interests, regardless of who else is involved.

Say what you want to say, the truth is that she doesn't respect you. That is why she is openly showing affection for Kunle. You haven't strongly reprimanded her and she's taken that for weakness and that has fuelled her attraction.
It may be too late now to make her stop.

My last word to you is, be ready to wield the big hammer. Take a firm and uncompromising decision, if it comes to that.
There are always better women out there. Why would you choose to stay with an immature one?

feranmi888:
How are you sure Kunle understands her body language, I never said anything to that effect. Though kunle had called me yesterday on phone sey him babe wan meet me, she come sey why would I want to meet her, I was like its there a big deal there? That it seems anything concerning Kunle now seems to be of ur attention, that I dont understand. She said stylishly " hmmm they want to meet fine boy" must you meet her. I just ignored.

feranmi888:
How are you sure Kunle understands her body language, I never said anything to that effect. Though kunle had called me yesterday on phone sey him babe wan meet me, she come sey why would I want to meet her, I was like its there a big deal there? That it seems anything concerning Kunle now seems to be of ur attention, that I dont understand. She said stylishly " hmmm they want to meet fine boy" must you meet her. I just ignored.

Persephone1:
Reverse psychology from a scheming manipulative woman! Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but your woman is long gone. She's so into Kunle, it's only a matter of time before she lets him have her. The bolded is just a way to eat her cake and have it. Form jealous to divert attention. Be wise!
Yes attraction respects no one but anyone in a committed relationship should know to deal with feelings for another person before they grow out of control.