₦airaland Forum

ahnie:
Ekwueme!Ekwueme!!
You're the living God oh
Eze no one like you.


That wasn't just a song,there lies the answers you seek.

A quick reminder as a brain teaser,that song up there was sang by osinachi.

GBAM!

I saw what you did there,

Osinachi: 'Ekwueme' singer died of lung cancer, I never hit her – Husband cries out. The husband of late popular gospel singer, Osinachi Nwachukwu, Peter, on Friday disclosed what killed his wife. Mr Nwachukwu disclosed that Osinachi died of lung cancer.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

Thank God it ended before the wedding. Think of the massive resources that would have been expended before and during d wedding n it now ended like this..... Not something you will imagine, abi.....forget him like he Neva existed n move on.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

Mothers always have reservations about all partners.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

Is your fiance from your tribe? It might be cultural difference. I have noticed what we considered to be disrespectful in yorubaland might not be so in other cultures.
Anyway, I don't see anything wrong in what you have done. There is nothing wrong in desiring a marriage where your spouse will adopt your family as his own and you will do vice versa. There are a lot of families like that where you will think in-law is a biological child of the family.
I guess your fiance doesn't want such relationship. I have seen this trait in some men where the man believes he is only marrying you and not your family members, hence, he completely alienate you from your family member once you are married.
I remember a memorable incident that happened on new year's eve when I was younger, our neigbour ( a medical doctor) carried cutlass and chased his wife ( a nurse) into our flat because she went to see her sick parents in their village (after 10 years) and came back a day later than she had promised to be back. This was because she couldn't get a vehicle to bring her back to town on time. This man beat her.
She and her older children cried that night, she was saying " Mo ti shi oko yan" meaning I have married wrongly.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

Please this days things are hard , people are frustrated. A guy spending all that money and you still want him to beg you. I won’t lie I won’t beg a woman to come back

That man is rudely behaved.
He would deal with you in marriage, since he has no regard for your people.

I am a man, and I understand not being a simp.

But if that kind of man tries to marry my sister after such behavior, I would disown them both.

Such rude idiot.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

You need to throw a very big Thanksgiving to God for saving you from a family bossy marriage u were about entrying. Just close go to God more, do things that makes happy and ur own husband will surely come. It's not our fault at all.

oldienavie:
@Op, I know this is not a good time for you so I will try and be gentle but at the same time tell you some salient truths.

As it stands today in Nigeria, it is women that are chasing men for marriage, so you have to understand that whether you agree or not, in Nigeria of today, when a man says, he wants to marry a woman, he believes he is doing her a favour, and if she does not relate to him on that frequency, he will behave/react the way your boyfriend behaved.

Your boyfriend thinks you will boss him around, or your family will turn him to a simp if he marries you that is why he ran, I am not saying that is the truth, but as a guy myself, there are some salient things I look for when I am with a lady that I consider redflags, I am not saying you or your family is bossy, but he definitely thinks you will not submit to him, as a lady, you should never tell a man you want to call off a relationship, even if you just meant to scare him use another thing, the moment you mention that, the men of today, will vex and since we get plenty options, it will not cost us anything to move on.

If your man comes back congratulations, but if he doesn't come back, try to protect your man from your family in future, even if your parents are complaining about him, find a way to manage it and do not let him know or do it with wisdom, cos many African men will think you are trying to turn them to a simp and they will not be able to control you when they marry you if you give that kind of impression.

In case you are no longer getting married to the man, I am a single guy myself looking for a wife so just let me know and maybe we can work something out....

Nice one!

Congratulations dear…. God has already delivered you.
My younger sister is also going thru same right now and as it is we also have called off the wedding. My sister’s fiancé is so full of himself, when he brought the marriage proposal my family agreed but told him that they could only do it next year because we already have events planned up for this year and it will be too chocked. Naso guy begin dey vex to the extent of him saying that my Dad should write out the budget that he will write my Dad cheque.
Omo!! We blasted him and his family infact it was sister herself that said she’s no longer interested in the wedding and yes we agreed with her. That’s an insult to us like…WTF !! Loro kan sha.. no wedding again and my sister too is Happy right now.

vickydevoka:
Please this days things are hard , people are frustrated. A guy spending all that mine and you still want him to beg you. I won’t lie I won’t beg a woman to come back

He is not the first person to get married na.

If you don't respect your wife, atleast respect her people.

Someone with that kind of behavior is a potential woman beater.

And nobody will be able to call him to order.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

You better be thanking God that his manners are exposed to you before you get into the marriage. He doesn't worth you be unhappy over but rather be happy it's over between you and him.

DukeNija:
Utter gibberish! I kept seeing my aunt, my mom, my dad, my neighbor Jesus Christ! Are they all in this relationship with you?
He made the right decision to walk away because it’s obvious he’ll have to deal with more than an indecisive and emotionally dependent wife. Aunt wants him to thank her for taking you, her own niece to the market to buy wedding items? Really? You should thank your aunt not him!
I congratulate the young man for saving himself from an entitled and overly intrusive family.

Women are really wahala people

@Gabless

Do not marry that man.
You are Lucky that you have unmasked a potential woman beater before he had the chance to impregnate you.

Many women were not that fortunate.

See that first page ba, there are a lot of people who need to have their heads checked there.

So, as a guy who wants to marry a lady I know is worth the rest of my life, saying "thank you" to her aunt (which wouldn't loot my pocket or ego in any way), is more expensive than the wedding itself.

Truthfully, I know a lot of women have reduced their worth because of their promiscuity and materialism, but if I consider a lady worthy of my lifetime, my emotions, then that lady must be a special breed and I won't treat her like the op's fiance.

As for the op @Gabless, it's most likely you offer no value to the guy or the guy doesn't see you as having any value or you were about to marry into the wrong family.

If you really want to marry, you better pray and trust God to bring the right man.

oldienavie:
@Op, I know this is not a good time for you so I will try and be gentle but at the same time tell you some salient truths.

As it stands today in Nigeria, it is women that are chasing men for marriage, so you have to understand that whether you agree or not, in Nigeria of today, when a man says, he wants to marry a woman, he believes he is doing her a favour, and if she does not relate to him on that frequency, he will behave/react the way your boyfriend behaved.

Your boyfriend thinks you will boss him around, or your family will turn him to a simp if he marries you that is why he ran, I am not saying that is the truth, but as a guy myself, there are some salient things I look for when I am with a lady that I consider redflags, I am not saying you or your family is bossy, but he definitely thinks you will not submit to him, as a lady, you should never tell a man you want to call off a relationship, even if you just meant to scare him use another thing, the moment you mention that, the men of today, will vex and since we get plenty options, it will not cost us anything to move on.

If your man comes back congratulations, but if he doesn't come back, try to protect your man from your family in future, even if your parents are complaining about him, find a way to manage it and do not let him know or do it with wisdom, cos many African men will think you are trying to turn them to a simp and they will not be able to control you when they marry you if you give that kind of impression.

In case you are no longer getting married to the man, I am a single guy myself looking for a wife so just let me know and maybe we can work something out....

Fact. Three ladies recently have beg me to marry them since I don’t have a gal friend. But me I need more money b4 marriage

Think twice before you marry once.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

You dodged a bullet. Please go for Thanksgiving and move on.

But I get you may not be very grateful if your souls have been bound by sex. And if that is the case, sorry.

OmO
Relationship no be moimoi o



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vickydevoka:
Fact. Three ladies recently have beg me to marry them since I don’t have a gal friend. But me I need more money b4 marriage

Believe me, women are still rare. At least good women are rare even though there are Jezebel's daughters all over the streets.

DukeNija:
Utter gibberish! I kept seeing my aunt, my mom, my dad, my neighbor Jesus Christ! Are they all in this relationship with you?
He made the right decision to walk away because it’s obvious he’ll have to deal with more than an indecisive and emotionally dependent wife. Aunt wants him to thank her for taking you, her own niece to the market to buy wedding items? Really? You should thank your aunt not him!
I congratulate the young man for saving himself from an entitled and overly intrusive family.

She is just 28 years.
A female that grew up and still live in her father's house.
Are you expecting her to enter marriage alone?
Small girl for that matter.

What are you even saying?
You want to isolate her from her family's influence because you wan marry am.?

You be bill gate?

CSTRR:
He is not the first person to get married na.

If you don't respect your wife, atleast respect her people.

Someone with that kind of behavior is a potential woman beater.

And nobody will be able to call him to order.

Them no the know bad wife and woman beater until the enter marriage oga. Don’t forget the ladies character pissed him off that’s y he also ran. Call the guy and he will tell you his own part of the story

vickydevoka:
Mothers always have reservations about all partners.

And most times their reservations are always right though not all but “most times”. Our mothers see things from afar of which we cannot see because we’re either in love or too relaxed that we don’t see the evils lurking around such parters like they say “when you’re too close to someone you’re usually the last person to know of his evils”.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

At 28, you're letting your family come between you and your man to extent you let them destroy your relationship.


I don't really know what must have transpired between the young man and your family but from your narrative, I will put the most blame on you.
You aren't emotionally, mentally and physically ready for marriage cuz you will mismanage your home affairs...

I'm interested to know what they were arguing about, whats the context of the argument?, only then we will know if the young man is being rude or your family are enforcing something he's not comfortable with...

Run!!! He doesn't l Iove. Don't take yourself to a marriage you will suffer in for the rest of your life.

Gabless:
I am 28 years old, a graduate of one of the university in South West. I work as a contract staff in a bank.

I met this guy about a year ago through my best female friend, and the journey started. I took him to my parents and he also took me to his parents too, and the wedding preparation started.

We were suppose to do family introduction but my parents says there is no need considering some logistic reasons. Although my mum has her reservation concerning him. But since my father has no objection I think am good to go.

He has sent money for some preparation since he is not residing in Lagos. The problem started after I went to idumota with my aunt to buy our engagement clothes. It was my aunt that drove me to the market. When we returned, my fiance called me, we talked for some times, but he couldn't appreciate my aunt for her kind gesture. Although my aunt didn't say anything that day but she wasn't happy. My dad also complained that he has been rude to him. The same goes with my mum.

The last straw that broke the Carmels back was when he was arguing with my aunt over the phone. He did not know I was in my aunt's house that particular day. I wasn't happy at all, thinking that if he would not regard my parents how would he treat me after marriage.

So I confronted him the second day over the phone, telling him that I'm not happy about the way my parents where complaining about him, and that attitude of him is creating fear in me. Instead for him to be a little remoseful and even call those people and apologize, he was arguing with me, still in my aunt's house.

So I told him, maybe we should put the preparation on hold thinking he would at least try and apologize to them. He just said, is that what you want and ended the call.

Everyone was surprised. He didn't call back it was his mum that called my mum, she didn't even persuade them to stop me from taking such step, and the guy too didn't call me for like too weeks until when I called him and he said he wasn't interested in the marriage again.

Actually, I wasn't happy and I have been downcasted since then, but on the other hand, May l ask this question does this guy really loves me?. Is he really mature enough for marriage. Is it all my fault? Please don't insult or abuse me. I just want to know if it's all my fault.

vickydevoka:
Them no the know bad wife and woman beater until the enter marriage oga. Don’t forget the ladies character pissed him off that’s y he also ran. Call the guy and he will tell you his own part of the story

I have read the story, and there is nothing too extreme about her behavior.

That is normal female attitude.

And this is a girl that is getting married for the first time.

She doesn't know much and she needs her family to guide her.

A man that loves her and is of good character will understand.

No be today people dey marry na.

Munzy14:
The guy got saved from a potential problem as well.

She is being influenced heavily by people around her..The Union won't even last stronger than a crackers biscuit.

I can't even date a lady who doesn't have a mind of her own, not to talk of marrying her.

She will be ever ready to be influenced and manipulated by external forces, there by denying the home the needed peace..Her type ga wu ndi ma Pastor said..My mom said, my Aunt said...no no no way.

She should wait for a man with her kind of character.

It is not always Rosy, but a lady I want to marry, putting the preparations on hold, till I apologise to her Aunt For a reason unserious is a total Fucc up.

My dad said never beg a woman to stay . His brother begged a lady to stay and he has been suffering. My cousin fiancée also put his wedding on hold ( bcus mama say, aunty say )immediately my cousin called off the wedding because him no one suffer like my uncle.

Both are correct and both are right at the same time depending on the perspective you see it from. As a man, you've to understand that you're not just marrying a woman, you're marrying her family and her family may not be like her, infact her family can even be very annoying. Just play to their tune, apologize if you need to apologize. (I have learnt that people tend to fall and can't control who apologizes, when in fact most times, you apologizing doesn't change anything. You apologizing doesn't reduce your quality, infact it makes things easy for you if you understand). As a man before you marry, you must learn how to apologize even if you're right and the other person is wrong.

As a woman, be careful of the man you're getting married to. Don't be carried away by all the love, vibes and giddy feelings. How the man treats your family will determine how he will treat you in the long run. A man true character is how he treats others and not necessarily how he treats you, open your eyes because you'll be the only one with him when you get married to him.

And for you Op, if he wants to call off the wedding, let him be. Perhaps he is thinking that you'll apologize or call him or beg maybe perhaps because of your age and all. Whereas, the truth is that God just saved you from a disaster. I wish you the best in Life. May you get married to the one who will treat you and your family right and don't let the pressure of age blind your eyes, you're unique and you're a queen.

Joe4real1988:
I thought as much coz op even said her aunt argued with him over money stuff.

Cus they must ve spent beyond the guys budget.

This girl is entitled af... You don't even need family interference, you would have wrecked the home yourself

In my opinion it's the guy who should be happy because he would have wasted money for this hash period.

You put a wedding on hold when it not you doing the spending. That's a red flag for me. You never really had an encounter with him but your family and they think the guy should worship them because he is getting married to you. Continue you will find the one who will accept you and your family wholeheartedly.

I thank ALMIGHTY that there are still very sensible and wise People in Nigeria. The Best Comments below gives me hope that a better Nigeria is still Possible. As for majority of brainless Egoistic Slaves of destructive Pride that are hailing the guy for treating the lady and her family as crap, your very own sisters and daughters shall soon marry this kind of myopic heartless guy with no iota of empathy, respect or true love in his heart.

boxer022:
Without mincing words I will tell you straight forward, this guy doesn't love you at all. Where I saw the first sign was when you said your mum had bad feelings towards him. He has a very bad character and is very arrogant to say the least. I am sure you didn't date him for sometime to know his true character. Thank your God very well that he didn't want to continue the marriage because you would have surely regretted it. Don't feel to bad with yourself or feel dejected over this, instead be very elated that God showed you who he truly is before proceeding with the marriage. You will surely get your own man, I can assure you that. That type of person is not ready for marriage at all, it must be his parents pressuring him to get married.

twosquare:
Better run...don't you guys did counseling at first, no matter how little?
Someone who can disrespect your father, you go see shege.
A lot of men arguing here lacks home training. I can't even do that to my father-in-law or her aunt. Wọn ò bimi da. Because I'm well brought up. If I don't like something, there is a diplomatic way to resolve it... And if you still insist, you're on your own...no one will place knife on my neck...
People should understand that during wedding preparations, tempers flare coz na the feathers of money dem dey pluck from each other's body...

As for the man, that's total wrong. And please, you too, pẹlẹ lakọ o labo.
Find a good man...not all these àwọn ọkùnrin irọlẹ ayé.

bukatyne:
First, one year is too short for a long distance relationship.

Secondly, you dodged a serious bullet. You do not want a man/husband who is not humble/invested enough in your marriage to be respectful to your family.

I also do not understand the kind of engagement with your family that would lead to him being rude to them especially your father. Especially because your father was his fan and would have seen him through rose tinted eyes; also, a lot of men 'respect' their women/wives' father's irrespective of the madness they bring to the table.

While your family members are third parties in your marriage, PLEASE marry a man who respects and regards them.

Also his mom calling your mom without trying to make it work speaks volumes. Except she doesn't want the marriage to hold, she would have tried to pursue peace even if both of you (intended couple) are misbehaving. Or even get an understanding of what happened.

An advise to you: carry your family more respectably. I don't see any reason why he should be so 'familiar' with your family that he is 'arguing' with them. Except your aunt is an integral part of your household, I am wondering the business they have together in the first place.

mariahAngel:
All signs could be ignored o, but you see that "my dad complained that he was rude to him.
Same as my mum" part? Boy bye!

As a lady, it is too much of a risk to settle with a man who does not respect nor regard one's parents.

DryMouth:
Girls always live in fantasy.
Stay there they give yourself hopes.

Na children men want. Men benefits nothing in a marriage.

Lol, indeed. A good marriage is beneficial to both genders. Can men really stay alone, like alone, not sleeping around oo, just be alone, even God saw that it would be difficult, that was why he created woman