You are forming big girl/madam you can’t forgive, continue carrying hatred in your mind, na you, your chest go heavy, a time will come nobody will blame him again.
Forgive and move on, or cry a river.

Lol... ranting because of 200k, that house you live in, are you paying rent? Abi u think they build house with the crumbs you added which is not even up to percent of the cost. You have too much pride. If I'm the husband, I wont take you back. Let your parents marry you

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

You want to destroy your beautiful home because of money, not that your hubby cheated on u, if you think is rossy out there enjoy, if I was in your husband shoes walahi I no go beg u, I go hustle your money pay back and let u be, I strongly believe that 200k was spent on house bills, the problem is you not your husband you seem like a very temperamental person cos of small peanuts wey u get, what makes u think his billions wount come, abeg shift, my candid advice is for the young man to keep pushing, his billions go soon. Enter

Op, your Writeup and everything disgust me, u r not fit to be a wife,
All these attitude onto 200k?
That man is better off without you..

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Follow your fathers advice

Gloriagee:
Where una dey see 600k abi na 400k land?

E dey lagos here naa but 700k

BENEAMATA:
my brother , may God mend their home . And wetin she dey find for the husband phone sef ? Na wah oh .

Curiosity kills the cat, she was insecured as well, she get luck say nobi my type she wake up from sleep just to ask that useless question "why did the man sent back 200k"

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Let the man return the money period.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

See rubbish wey person they write. You are married but you are only after yourself and yourself alone. If selfishness was a person, then that's you. You want a land of your own. Why did you marry in the first place if you two can't work as a team? weyrey.

Your type na like those blessing ceo them. weyrey make I help you. why not replace your thieving husband with a d ildo? That way your 200k will never get stolen again. Build the house and live in it all by yourself, use the d ildo and f uck yourself and leave the man alone.

if you visited him and he did everything to show you he has changed but you still can't forgive him then the problem is you might have an unforgiven spirit and you need to see a Real man of God

Trojan8:


Are you sure that you are OK?

Are you sure you are not bird of same feather with men like the OP husband that dupes women and emotionally blackmails them?

Let me Frank with you on this , you made your first mistakes immediately you started thinking about having property in your name and soley for you, no reasonable man would ever trust such a woman, then the mistake of parking out from his house , your dad need to know better,I don't know why he is giving you the advice of not going back to him simply because he spent just your 200k , the money you could make much more from him if you're the humble and submissive type , the basic truth is that while you were away for this two months or thereabouts ,you have thought your husband how to live without you and even if you returned back to him which I expect you to do as Soon as possible ,you won't be returning to the same man again, just don't be surprised if in future you get to know about a side chick who happened to be responsible for his well being while you're away, ( you have the attitude of a lady brought up by man ,when I noticed the absence of your mum role at the end of your write up I wasn't really surprised)) .
The best moments for you to have corrected your selfishness induced mistake was when his dad came all the way from the village to beg you but you threw away that golden opportunity that could have earned you the greatest honour for life in that family.

culf:


you started very well but spoilt it later. Who is he working for? the money he is making is for who and who? Common sense is very important. Most supportive wives scam their hubby but they don't mind, after all, they usually help when he is cashtrap so why bother, that is common sense. I don't support the man and i'm not in support of the wife's behaviours too, she is not ready for marriage

Directly or indirectly you support the husband and perhaps you will see nothing wrong in the future if you have a daughter that struggles to send you financial support and ends up with guy that dupes her like the OP's husband.

If I could understand you clearly, your husband told you he had a means of acquiring genuine land somewhere.
He called your attention to this, not you asked him to get you genuine land that you had an idle cash to own a tangible property.
Initially, he had good intentions for the family. He hinted you about the land because you might have no idea how much he really likes the new site but you told him you will like to have the land singlehandedly. Just because you have the resources to develop the site your own.
Do you think your husband is stupid to get you involved in the matter or you think because he already had a house, he didn't deserve to have another?
All I see here is not but self-interest from the young lady.
Your husband was at fault when he already agreed to allowed you to have the land in your own name. All things being equal, he inflated the land cost. Of which you got to know that you had overpaid your husband but refused to refund the excess.
This now lead to war between you and your husband and probably you leave your home because he could not refund the sum.
Here, your family didn't act well, their thought was that, their daughter is capable of having land in her name but your husband was not been verisimilitude enough to handle the situation and for that reason he meant nothing well for you. Instead of them to disagree with your plans to move out of your marriage. Your dad supported you take such a deadly decision.
So, after you packed out, your husband felt that was best way to teaching you lesson since you didn't troubled to get married at that age of yours. He decided to let you face the aloneness for you to understand money is not everything. Which was right and at the same time wrong. He needs not to be too rigid in his decision since he is aware of your condition but he was.
I will advise you to settle all greys area with your husband and live like husband and wife.
Please, know this and know peace. Women don't like when the husband is smart but never like either when their wards aren't smart. They prefer their children to be smarter and not their husbands.
To say all in nitty gritty, one must be goat and other a sheep for peace have settings in the home.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Another one don use hand destroy her marriage. Has your husband ever bothered about what you do with the money he gives to you for feeding? I just don't know why women keep doing this, just because of 200k you want to cause everlasting hurt to your children, you didn't understand his explanation why not ask for clarification? next thing youve packed out, quarrels, etc. Some of you who aren't matured for marriage should wait a bit longer and stop bringing up shameful stories on nairaland everytime. It's really annoying

advanceDNA:
Tables have turned.....this is something women do on a normal day but they cant take it..... thank God you are doing well...enjoy yourself ....you dont need a husband anyway

This can only happen when woman have a better source of income than her husband, imagine if its the other way round na just to say sorry and knack kpekus she'll then cook special food for that day and everything is bygone

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

All this ur attitude because of 200k ? Nawah oo

The only fellow who is happy here na the only enemy of the home satan. In a marriage there shouldn't be anything like "mine" or "my own" again, the twain has become one. I see unforgiveness, stubbornness, pride, selfishness, secrecy in this story. Sister abeg you and your hubby need to forgive each other and pray for God's forgiveness and help to deal with the challenges as one strong united home. Challenges are a part of life even in a marriage and more will still come. God bless your home in Jesus name.

You took it too far, despite the fact that your husband did wrong.

My pride will never allow me take money from you, but from the moment you rent another house, marriage don scatter.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Tell him if he has really changed he 1st has to do the right thing and return the 200k. it was deceitful of him. After this action the healing and forgiveness can start.

Don't get back just because he Says he's sorry by mouth let there be actions to back up his words.

You’re clearly part of the problem and your dad is not helping

And it seems perhaps he married you for your money or hardwork

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

.

I have learnt the hard way that any issue involving marriage don't judge based on the account of one of the parties involved.
Nairaland is not the best place to seek counsel over your issue because some of them here are young folks who have no experience about marriage as you can see from their comments like if it's a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. We have been in it for years and what you're saying is not new in many homes.

This issue of money and trust has been one of the issues affecting many homes and it has led many married folks to take decisions hastily without thinking of the ripple effects.
It's quite unfortunate what your husband did but forgiving him would have averted all this stories that touch. In marriage both parties have their weakness but it is their ability to forgive themselves, work on themselves and forge ahead that matters.

From your narrative I can point out that you felt really betrayed that your husband broke your trust for him over money but many are facing much worst things but they never left their homes why? Because there is a wisdom to it.
Trust broken can be earned again and it starts with forgiveness.
Imagine if God refuses to forgive you all your trespasses?

Family sometimes can be overprotective but you are not in your home and they are in theirs but hope they are equally telling you the real issues they are facing in their homes?
A home is not only built on love, trust, sacrifice etc. It is equally built on forgiveness, patience, tolerance, long suffering etc

I pray God heals your hurt and grant both you and your hubby the wisdom to make amends, forgive each other, trust each other and forge ahead together because you're both young in marriage and it's unfortunate you both were not guided properly. It wouldn't have gotten to this.

You're still young to put yourself through all of this. Haba!

Marriage sweet o! But na wisdom you go need.

manmade:
Let me Frank with you on this , you made your first mistakes immediately you started thinking about having property in your name and soley for you, no reasonable man would ever trust such a woman, then the mistake of parking out from his house , your dad need to know better,I don't know why he is giving you the advice of not going back to him simply because he spent just your 200k , the money you could make much more from him if you're the humble and submissive type , the basic truth is that while you were away for this two months or thereabouts ,you have thought your husband how to live without you and even if you returned back to him which I expect you to do as Soon as possible ,you won't be returning to the same man again, just don't be surprised if in future you get to know about a side chick who happened to be responsible for his well being while you're away, ( you have the attitude of a lady brought up by man ,when I noticed the absence of your mum role at the end of your write up I wasn't really surprised)) .
The best moments for you to have corrected your selfishness induced mistake was when his dad came all the way from the village to beg you but you threw away that golden opportunity that could have earned you the greatest honour for life in that family.

You said it all. It is finished!

Guy ur smart.
I pity the man that married u in the first place.
Just imagine this lady. Ur husband wanted both of u to buy land, u said no. U want it for urself(selfishness).
He ate ur 200k, which could have been agency fee. U left ur marriage because of that.
It’s either ur a demon or something is wrong with u.
Because u are not capable of love.

Fahvvy:
How do you forgive him?
By forgiving him na ...

Marriage is not relationship o that you can brezz in and out as you wish ...
Marriage will test and stretch you farther than anything else will ..

On a more serious note...
It's clear and glaring that you don't consider yourself as a team? ...

Let's look at your write up ...

I have always helped him in his house projects,might not be much 100k,50k,20k when need be,I never siphoned my money to myself,as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head,(3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that "we" should buy it together,I told him no,I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it,( just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller."we" did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

So even when "two have become one" you still act as if you guys are not a team ...

The only time the word "we" appeared there, it was because it was suggested by your hubby ...

So while he sees you guys as a team, you see yourself as competitors ...

Until you change your mindset, it's best you don't go back ...

I'm not trying to excuse your hubby's actions, however, if you intend to go back with this mindset of unforgiveness, disunity and distrust, just be prepared for everyday quarrel ...

And that too will affect your kids ...

From the days of Adam Women has been Scammers too..

culf:
Imagine the type of issue that is causing separation, its unfortunate.

You're a lady so it might mean a lot to you but do you know that most times money given to wives for one thing or another, some wives divert part of it, Oga know but won't even bother including feeding money meant for the family.
This same money causing issues, if it were to be another person, will you have known? some people don't mix business with anything and probably maybe your hubby is one that thinks everybody should pay for his service including his wife. Truth is, what he did is wrong, he should have asked for payment rather than taking it through the back door.
To me, this is not suppose to lead to any serious fight or separation.

#Some people who are not suppose to be in marriage are already married.

the girl is just a girl. Still young and stupid. Women cheat their husbands all the time we over look it. Women are indeed useless.

Husband said you people should buy land together but you must be selfish. Na wa o. The husband is even a good man. Trust me i will never beg such a useless girl

I think the only solution here is for him to apologize and refund your money period! He should be a real man and not a thief!

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

If na me he go pain me oh,the reason why is I have been contributing emensly to the marriage without issue,so with this u now conclude I may have more money,u now come up with a fraudulent way to scam someone who has been a help means is not as if I was stingy as a wife,the only way to get it off my chest is for him to return my 200k back

AutoRedux:


See rubbish wey person they write. You are married but you are only after yourself and yourself alone. If selfishness was a person, then that's you. You want a land of your own. Why did you marry in the first place if you two can't work as a team? weyrey.

Your type na like those blessing ceo them. weyrey make I help you. why not replace your thieving husband with a d ildo? That way your 200k will never get stolen again. Build the house and live in it all by yourself, use the d ildo and f uck yourself and leave the man alone.

tell the bitch

Error401:
Lol... ranting because of 200k, that house you live in, are you paying rent? Abi u think they build house with the crumbs you added which is not even up to percent of the cost. You have too much pride. If I'm the husband, I wont take you back. Let your parents marry you

very annoying. Very selfish goats. How does she have sef that she is carrying shoulder

Why did you dig through his phone in the first place? In my own opinion, you got what you deserved like the other 98% of women who go about nosing through their husband's phones looking for incriminating stuff. Records have it that 99% of the time, they end up shedding premium tears because they always find incriminating stuff which leads to an instant mood swing. Serves you right. Ntoor!!!!
Now you have used your hand to destroy the peace of your home and now here on nairaland looking for people to make you feel justified for your actions. You better go and beg that guy because in turn reacting to his mistake, you have done worse by leaving your home and dragging your kids selfishly into the drama because you feel you can do it alone.

Like how the Bleep will you leave your matrimonial home because your husband played a fast one on you? It happens sometimes. Yeah he broke your trust but it's a matter that could have been settled amicably between you both. Now you have taken his weakness out of your home to your parents and probably your friends and here on naira land. No one deserves to be psychologically tortured because he made a mistake most especially a man you claim you love. He will most definitely be affected by your actions. Nobody is above mistakes and beyond redemption and it was very selfish of you to blow things off proportion. I wish you well though and hope you both learn from your mistakes and settles things for the sake of your kids.

Shame no catch you that its just 200k that made you move out of your marriage, this gender and stinginess