₦airaland Forum

PJtech:
Lack of supervision from parent/guardian. A girl got 5month pregnant under ur roof, you negleted ur guardian role(ur wife should take 90% of the blame)

do have a talk with ur wife, never leave ur kids with same fate as this poor girl.... Learn from this mistake

Beey:
You taking the girl in and supporting her education is commendable. It sounds like she was a bit idle and that’s how she found time to meet with the young man. I want to believe that she’s not as naive as people may want to make it sound. At that age, she must have had some biology lessons. It was probably curiosity and the excitement of being told that she’s loved, that pushed her into that situation. Now with that said, my advise is for you to reconsider your decision. People fall down and then get back up again. Pregnancy though highly discouraged at her age, is not the cause for her to receive a lifetime of condemnation. Have her go to the village and have the baby. Let her stay till the baby is weaned. Am sure she’ll face difficulties that will force her to mature and focus. After that, she can leave the baby with her mother and go back to school. Please save her from becoming another addition to statistics of poverty and lack of education. Please continue to sponsor her studies as you had planned. Take her as if she were your own daughter who made a mistake and give her a 2nd chance. In the future, go for domestic help who are over 18 years old and can handle the consequences of their actions.

Beey:
You taking the girl in and supporting her education is commendable. It sounds like she was a bit idle and that’s how she found time to meet with the young man. I want to believe that she’s not as naive as people may want to make it sound. At that age, she must have had some biology lessons. It was probably curiosity and the excitement of being told that she’s loved, that pushed her into that situation. Now with that said, my advise is for you to reconsider your decision. People fall down and then get back up again. Pregnancy though highly discouraged at her age, is not the cause for her to receive a lifetime of condemnation. Have her go to the village and have the baby. Let her stay till the baby is weaned. Am sure she’ll face difficulties that will force her to mature and focus. After that, she can leave the baby with her mother and go back to school. Please save her from becoming another addition to statistics of poverty and lack of education. Please continue to sponsor her studies as you had planned. Take her as if she were your own daughter who made a mistake and give her a 2nd chance. In the future, go for domestic help who are over 18 years old and can handle the consequences of their actions.

DSS1335:
I am writing this with a sorrowful heart!
This is quite a lengthy piece!!


In 2018, My wife brought a live-in maid toward the end of her gestational period as we eagerly anticipate the birth of our first fruit after 8 years of marriage.

We took the young girl as part of our family, she was just 13 years old in JSS2 at the time she joined us. She does minor household chores, like washing the dishes, keeping the house in and out clean, that's all. I made sure
her education was not interrupted, she continued her schooling from Js3 till she completed her SSCE this year. Outsiders thought she was my first child considering the way she was being taken good care of.

At 16 years age, the evidence of proper nutrition was so glaring in her physique, the young girl of yesterday was already a beautiful damsel. I protected her from ravenous men old enough to be her father. Even from her classmates. Perhaps the mistake i made was in buying her phone before WAEC exam started. Well, the need for constant communication can not be overemphasized because i and my wife go out for work in the morning. My wife comes back in the day while i return back in the evening. Living her our 2 kids in her care: My first Child is 3 years plus in Nursery, the second is about 2 years in Prenursery.

When her mother made a stop by to visit her daughter 5 months ago after 4 years, she was so full of praise and thanking us for taking good care of her daughter, and begged us to allow her stay longer with us rather than her returning back to the village after completing her WAEC. I and my wife plan that i will take up the responsibility to train her up in University so she can be light to her family. Her elder siblings didn't complete their secondary school!

Today, all those dreams and aspirations have been shattered! The innocent girl child i took as a daughter is 5 months pregnant without even knowing she was pregnant! How possible? I could have swear with my life that she was still a virgin and innocent. Damm it! Where do I start from eh??

Well, my wife was rattled up by a what she called a terrible nightmare, she dreamt that she saw her girl carrying a new born baby. That was around 3 A.M she woke her up from sleep and asked her if she was pregnant, the girl denied it ignorantly. My wife had no reason to suspect her as she always buy her pads for her monthly menses except for this month. Then examined her and her suspicion became heightened as she saw a remarkable changes, her bra can't fit any longer, her bellybutton was out with black line running down! She ordered her to pee and run her test kit, it came back positive! My wife broke down in tears.

That morning, we didn't go to work for the day. we grilled her with questions. She confessed to us that she had intercourse only once in the month MAY yet she was still seeing her monthly menses. That she had a boy friend whom they secretly communicate on phone every day. That she lost her virginity to the boy. And they did it only ones in less than 30 minutes as she came back to check the kids who were still sleeping in the afternoon.

The boy came to visit her grand mother who return from the USA, she refused traveling to the East due to insecurities and rented a flat opposite my compound for just 3 months from March to June. During her stay, all her children and grandchildren came to visit her. It was one of her grand son that lured my maid and took advantage of her innocences.

We contacted the boy on phone and told him what happened, he denied it that it is impossible for him to be held responsible that he had sex with her only once and that's not enough to get a girl pregnant! I swear,i could have dealt with him fatally if he were within my reach. Well, i was able to comport myself and explain to him in details after which he kept quiet. He is just 20 years old awaiting admission. We have informed the girl's mother too who became shock and cold! And asked her daughter to return back to the village!

Considering this scenario, i came up with the plan to make that boy and family take up the responsibility of the pregnancy, she can't remain with my family anymore so as not draw unnecessary attention. I will track down the boy and his family and file a statutory rape charge against them if all avenue to resolve this case peacefully fail. From Pregnancy to child care is no joke. My people that is no joke at all. I feel very bad and compassionate for the innocent young girl who will be forced to sacrifice her future to be in the family way.

Any honest advise on how best to tackle this issue at hand would be appreciated

DSS1335:
I have come to realize that live-in maids who were discriminated and ill-treated will not have the gut to misbehave this way. This girl enjoy all loves bestowed on her by my wife. She dress the way my wife does and use good perfumes.

My tenants all thought she was my first child.
I loved her the way i would loved my child.i took compassion on her due to her mother and wanted her to be light to her family. I guess God have good reasons for the twist in her fate! Honestly i wouldn't have given it a second thought to have her abort the foetus had we discovered this pregnancy earlier.

DSS1335:
I am writing this with a sorrowful heart!
This is quite a lengthy piece!!


In 2018, My wife brought a live-in maid toward the end of her gestational period as we eagerly anticipate the birth of our first fruit after 8 years of marriage.

We took the young girl as part of our family, she was just 13 years old in JSS2 at the time she joined us. She does minor household chores, like washing the dishes, keeping the house in and out clean, that's all. I made sure
her education was not interrupted, she continued her schooling from Js3 till she completed her SSCE this year. Outsiders thought she was my first child considering the way she was being taken good care of.

At 16 years age, the evidence of proper nutrition was so glaring in her physique, the young girl of yesterday was already a beautiful damsel. I protected her from ravenous men old enough to be her father. Even from her classmates. Perhaps the mistake i made was in buying her phone before WAEC exam started. Well, the need for constant communication can not be overemphasized because i and my wife go out for work in the morning. My wife comes back in the day while i return back in the evening. Living her our 2 kids in her care: My first Child is 3 years plus in Nursery, the second is about 2 years in Prenursery.

When her mother made a stop by to visit her daughter 5 months ago after 4 years, she was so full of praise and thanking us for taking good care of her daughter, and begged us to allow her stay longer with us rather than her returning back to the village after completing her WAEC. I and my wife plan that i will take up the responsibility to train her up in University so she can be light to her family. Her elder siblings didn't complete their secondary school!

Today, all those dreams and aspirations have been shattered! The innocent girl child i took as a daughter is 5 months pregnant without even knowing she was pregnant! How possible? I could have swear with my life that she was still a virgin and innocent. Damm it! Where do I start from eh??

Well, my wife was rattled up by a what she called a terrible nightmare, she dreamt that she saw her girl carrying a new born baby. That was around 3 A.M she woke her up from sleep and asked her if she was pregnant, the girl denied it ignorantly. My wife had no reason to suspect her as she always buy her pads for her monthly menses except for this month. Then examined her and her suspicion became heightened as she saw a remarkable changes, her bra can't fit any longer, her bellybutton was out with black line running down! She ordered her to pee and run her test kit, it came back positive! My wife broke down in tears.

That morning, we didn't go to work for the day. we grilled her with questions. She confessed to us that she had intercourse only once in the month MAY yet she was still seeing her monthly menses. That she had a boy friend whom they secretly communicate on phone every day. That she lost her virginity to the boy. And they did it only ones in less than 30 minutes as she came back to check the kids who were still sleeping in the afternoon.

The boy came to visit her grand mother who return from the USA, she refused traveling to the East due to insecurities and rented a flat opposite my compound for just 3 months from March to June. During her stay, all her children and grandchildren came to visit her. It was one of her grand son that lured my maid and took advantage of her innocences.

We contacted the boy on phone and told him what happened, he denied it that it is impossible for him to be held responsible that he had sex with her only once and that's not enough to get a girl pregnant! I swear,i could have dealt with him fatally if he were within my reach. Well, i was able to comport myself and explain to him in details after which he kept quiet. He is just 20 years old awaiting admission. We have informed the girl's mother too who became shock and cold! And asked her daughter to return back to the village!

Considering this scenario, i came up with the plan to make that boy and family take up the responsibility of the pregnancy, she can't remain with my family anymore so as not draw unnecessary attention. I will track down the boy and his family and file a statutory rape charge against them if all avenue to resolve this case peacefully fail. From Pregnancy to child care is no joke. My people that is no joke at all. I feel very bad and compassionate for the innocent young girl who will be forced to sacrifice her future to be in the family way.

Any honest advise on how best to tackle this issue at hand would be appreciated

STARGREEN:
Lack of close supervision

Huracan:
The best comment I have ever seen ..bro pregnancy isn't a death sentence. That girl might get a bright future ahead..go train em'!!!!

Lastpharoah33:
I can understand the utter disappointment on your ward. Naivety and a little touch of youthful ebullience got the better of her.

Someone mentioned lack of supervision, you saying dude should put a tracker on the girl?
Or maybe have her be on leash to be dragged along, huh?

Life happened to her, if what you wrote up there is what really transpired (as regards to your benevolence towards your ward), I really think taking her back to her mom is a good step.

But am totally against going ballistic on the nig that did put her in the family way. It's a choice thing. Either he embraces with full chest or bounce. Nature/karma will always take it's cause.

ecolime:
Chaiii

Few months ago, our 19 year old live-in maid ran off with a 20 years old boy. She packed and moved to a ghetto here in PH because of love

Thank God we were able to track her, got her arrested and bundled her back to her family in Lagos where we took her from.

Once they turn teenagers, it's very easy for boys to deceive them.

This is a girl that had a big room, A.C, quality clothes and latest gadgets to herself. She wrote WAEC last year and was only awaiting admission.

My wife loved her so much and took her like a daughter. You will never know she isn't our blood. She flew and travel everywhere with us but Penis derailed her life.

I was so grateful she didn't get pregnant else it would have been a different case.

Now, we don't do live-in maids. It's cash and carry. Our new maid comes to clean up the house once we are back from work at 4pm.. (works 5pm to 7pm). Then work on Saturdays too (8am to 5pm) Once you are done, go back to your house. While she's fully off on Sunday.

You always want the best of life for them but they don't love their lives enough.

It is well with you bro

stocktaker:
if you really love the girl convince her mother let the pregnant be terminated under the supervision of a proffessional doctor , you will be happy as she will bounce back to her life again

stocktaker:
if you really love the girl convince her mother let the pregnant be terminated under the supervision of a proffessional doctor , you will be happy as she will bounce back to her life again

mariahAngel:
You see some boys ehn? They're like horñy ekuke dogs that cannot control themselves.
Going about, ruining destinies with their nonsense "one eyed snake".
Nonsense!



Of course!
If the irresponsible boy is old enough to have sex, he should be old enough to accept the reward/consequence that comes with having sex.

SpecialAdviser:
Don't go crazy with this girl for an error committed by you and your wife. You didn't give her enough sex education.

DSS1335:
Thank you for your honest advise.

We have been able to trace through the help of the estate caretaker and contacted her aunty who was their grandmother's point of contact in PH through out their 3 months stay. She has accepted to help us mediate in the case, she will inform her Mother (the boy's grandma) and her sister(the boy's mother) about all that transpired. That the boy lives with his parents in Obigbo before ABA. If all efforts to resolve this case peacefully fails, i will file for statutory rape charge.



This doesn't make any sense!
What will she gain for withholding such a very sensitive information from us?

When she was in SS1, i was forced to change her school after 3rd term, she confided in my wife that one of her male teacher was giving her undue attention to the point of inviting her to his house coupled with the fact that senior boys in her school were also disturbing her.

This girl doesn't lack anything, whatever she needs or payment that comes, we clear it.
We live comfortably in my 3 bedroom flat. She has her own room, i don't allow her to watch any kind of indecent movie or music by ensuring that such channels are under lock filtering out only cartoon, starlife, zeeworld, and other children friendly channels. my wife has her room but we sleep together with our 2 kids.

Sometimes in June, my wife went through her phone call history, she receives call only from the guy constantly and other female friends whom we assumed were her classmates. we inquired what association she has with this boy that calls her all time even at odd hours of the night. we knew something wasnt ok as WhatsApp chat and sms were deleted. She wasn't allowed to use Facebook as we tried our best to keep her under close watch. On weekends, in our presence, she isn't allowed to use phone as my wife always hold it.
What else could we have done. Our best wasn't enough i guess! And yes, my wife taught her sex education, i guess she was just too stupid, gullible, naive to fall for whatever the boy said. This a big lesson to all parents. We have learnt ours in a very hard way

UjuJoan2:
Imagine if this girl were your actual child. Think of what you would have done, and then do it.

PJtech:
Lack of supervision from parent/guardian. A girl got 5month pregnant under ur roof, you negleted ur guardian role(ur wife should take 90% of the blame)

do have a talk with ur wife, never leave ur kids with same fate as this poor girl.... Learn from this mistake

Kirchoffs:
Oga sharrap and blame your housemaid cum Foster child and leave the boy out of it. When she dey open leg she no no abi.

Dollar is now 800 and you expect a boy of 20years to come and play daddy with the mad inflation in Nigeria now.

Am sure you got the poor girl pregnant and now wnt to frame an innocent boy to take the fall for it

Richy4:
Have you visited Google yet to find out the cost of DNA test in Nigeria?..It doesn't come cheap...
Are u sure a 20yr old who is most likely a university student can afford that?

STARGREEN:
Lack of close supervision

NoToPile:
I am having a problem wrapping my head around the fact that it's so easy to deceive small small girls. Especially those that know where they are coming from, you have an opportunity to make your life better and you mess it up. Nawa oo.



Lool at penis derailed her life, I honestly don't just get it, all these small small children born 2000 upwards are something else.

This matter is just peppering my body.

ecolime:
Chaiii

Few months ago, our 19 year old live-in maid ran off with a 20 years old boy. She packed and moved to a ghetto here in PH because of love

Thank God we were able to track her, got her arrested and bundled her back to her family in Lagos where we took her from.

Once they turn teenagers, it's very easy for boys to deceive them.

This is a girl that had a big room, A.C, quality clothes and latest gadgets to herself. She wrote WAEC last year and was only awaiting admission.

My wife loved her so much and took her like a daughter. You will never know she isn't our blood. She flew and travel everywhere with us but Penis derailed her life.

I was so grateful she didn't get pregnant else it would have been a different case.

Now, we don't do live-in maids. It's cash and carry. Our new maid comes to clean up the house once we are back from work at 4pm.. (works 5pm to 7pm). Then work on Saturdays too (8am to 5pm) Once you are done, go back to your house. While she's fully off on Sunday.

You always want the best of life for them but they don't love their lives enough.

It is well with you bro

grandstar:
DSS1335

Why don't you find a middle ground? Send the girl back to her parents and she can give birth there to ward off people's eyes. After sometime, she can return to you but leave the baby behind with her mother. She can proceed with her studies and future with you. She can keep in regular contact and you'll get update about him as well. That's really your first grandchild. It's your compensation for your many years of childlessness. (Read Psalms 19:17)

Sending the boy to jail isn't the answer. If he can pay monthly child support for the child, that would be smarter or else, he'll end up in prison and won't be able to contribute a cent to his baby's upkeep from there. Paying child support might also make him grow up. I don't support gunshot weddings.

Please don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. I am pleading.

Beey:
You taking the girl in and supporting her education is commendable. It sounds like she was a bit idle and that’s how she found time to meet with the young man. I want to believe that she’s not as naive as people may want to make it sound. At that age, she must have had some biology lessons. It was probably curiosity and the excitement of being told that she’s loved, that pushed her into that situation. Now with that said, my advise is for you to reconsider your decision. People fall down and then get back up again. Pregnancy though highly discouraged at her age, is not the cause for her to receive a lifetime of condemnation. Have her go to the village and have the baby. Let her stay till the baby is weaned. Am sure she’ll face difficulties that will force her to mature and focus. After that, she can leave the baby with her mother and go back to school. Please save her from becoming another addition to statistics of poverty and lack of education. Please continue to sponsor her studies as you had planned. Take her as if she were your own daughter who made a mistake and give her a 2nd chance. In the future, go for domestic help who are over 18 years old and can handle the consequences of their actions.