duduade:


Stay back in Nigeria while the kids join their mother... You can be visiting them ....and vice versa where they can be visiting you in Nigeria

this one dey think from yansh

Okonandmary:
You will lose your wife soon.
Just a little freedom and she is misplacing her priorities.

Sometimes i winder why it is difficult for some women to play along as a team reaching a goal with their husbands

I will advice you not to worry yourself, the cure for this isn't to run yourself down with hypertension. Stop caring and acting like you cant live without her.

It's cos we have lost our values,
Most black ladies in IT abroad don't earn anything close to their Indian counterparts,yet you will never see the Indians disrespect their husbands nor will you see a Chinese lady take her husband to an American court.
Values is key,

kbower:


This is exactly what I did over the last 2 days now, and guess what, she has been stalking me with calls. I only call her when there is something important to discuss, but calls based on, i miss u and all of that nor even dey again, the moment she noticed I have drifted from showing affection over calls, she started bombarding me with calls complaining that I dont call her.

don't over do this so she dosnt use that as an excuse to do shit

VawulenceLover:
with the tyoe it money he mentioned, I don't even know what he is going to find abroad

I was also wondering the same thing. OP had 27M, so why hellbent on japa-ring? With that kind of money, you can do so much here in Naija.

If you dig deeper, you will find that it was the wife that pushed for them to leave, now he is at her mercy.

caandi:
At Op, I see myself In your wife, we are not understood at all, wen we are sad � you don’t get us, wen we need comfort you come with advice like we have chicken brain, truth be told we are stubborn but we need reassurance of love every now and then. When we smile cos we are pretty it’s mistaken for flirting, 13 years of marriage should have made you know what she is capable of…. Inbtw I would love to know her zodiac sign it might help to know if she is capable of cheating when pushed away or when hurt
In all pls don’t snub or push her away
Try to understand her
Lest she falls into another man’s arm
I have a lot to say
Bout I will drop my pen � here

Why una come de like that. That one no be life

kbower:


This was my initial plan, because me sef nor like stay abroad, I love my country even though things are hard, but the major problem na if she go school who wan stay with kids, if she go work who wan stay with the kids, and to hire a nanny in the UK is like 50 pounds or more per day.

na bad advice be that o. Don't make a mistake of leaving your wife there and staying here o. That guy advicing u to do that after reading your write up is an agent or Satan

yungz:
@kbower


with emphasis on loyalty, why did you send her out?
i don’t know where women adopt this behavior of disrespecting their spouse once they leave nigeria?

your wife disrespect’s you in nigeria and you still have the mind to relocate her to a country that gives women the veto power to useless their spouse.

sentiment asides, a form of transaction in exchange for exposure or connects would probably hold someday between your spouse and y/friend in liverpool or mr mike.

ps: if your kids are minor please leave them in nigeria.

Omo I tire na. This tyoe no suppose commot from naija

petitejolie:
Mr Man go there and work your way. No let woman matter kill you. Go there and see for yourself wats going on. Don't thread on assumptions. I believe you are not lazy. Anything that will make stay home, cleaning baby poo and not working while she brings in the money should be avoided.

You have not been to abroad. A man and woman works equally. So him must clean poo

.

OkoAmarashy:


I see a lot of foolish men allowing their wives lead them to the UK. They will come back crying in 2 years max.
You leave your work, follow your wife go UK, make am primary applicant. You are already ruined.

90 % of men were led by their wife. My free sold him house 25 million and when the go their they wife changed completely

OkoAmarashy:


I see a lot of foolish men allowing their wives lead them to the UK. They will come back crying in 2 years max.
You leave your work, follow your wife go UK, make am primary applicant. You are already ruined.

My brother is about to do same thing I begged him he refused

Santa2:


Dear Poster, you are insecured..Get a grip.

na secured people dem dey fück their wife for their back while dey keep doing secured

kbower:


This is exactly what I did over the last 2 days now, and guess what, she has been stalking me with calls. I only call her when there is something important to discuss, but calls based on, i miss u and all of that nor even dey again, the moment she noticed I have drifted from showing affection over calls, she started bombarding me with calls complaining that I dont call her.

You need more of this especially when you get to the uk and she is not changing for good. Face your life and never show you care, make money and have plan B behind her back in case she start to misbehave cos a woman like this may see another man that will sweet mouth her into making her citizen and she goes with such person

HardBishop:


Is you that's displaying maximum potent of stupidity. It seems you don't know what marriage is all about. Lies, trickery are all part of what western marriages entails. Remove children and sex, I don't see anything valuable marrying a WOMAN

Calm down Mr. Man, the guy is telling you the truth. You're letting your heart control you instead of YOUR BRAIN. No woman is worth dying over. Your objectives in life is what should be paramount, I learnt that very early in life. Stamp your authority but focus more on your GOALS/TARGET. If you let the woman wahala take over your heart, you may end up harming her and end up in jail. But if you focus on your goals, you'll achieve them and throw the bitch where she belongs at the end of the day. NO GO LET WOMAN MATTER GIVE YOU BP o.

beelon1020:
Bro’s sorry about this, but I tell you, that mr mike don dey bang your wife,..
1. How did he know she got big backside?... because he has seen it.. but your wife will deny this ofcorse...
2. You see what happened in the video call? That was a planned move by her, they were together before your call came in...
3. Both of them have been dating behind you, she is just trying to balance her actions...
you see a friend of mine bleeping a married naija lady here,.. the bleeping na brutal one... but anytime ithe husband called from naija, she no go pick, when she pick, the guy go hide him other room for them to talk, after she finished video and phone calls with hubby... omo bleeping continued o!
Honestly I was surprised to find out how women are generally lose in here and most Western world...
Heard many cases among my homies here, banging many married women... mostly during winter... that cold hennnn! It’s well o
At this point.. reset your mind set OGA... be prayerful, watchful and be very observant... all the best..

i swear to God bruh THIS IS THE HONEST TRUTH..All those story his wife been dey tell am na BiG lIES..NO WORRY YOU WILL KNOW THE TRUTH VERY VERY SOON…Fear 9ja married women home � & abroad..e get why

kbower:
Hi Nlanders

We all know no marriage is all that smooth and rosey, we all that are in it have challenges here and there, and for almost 11 years now, out of tolerance, ruggedity, minding my business in terms of taking care of the family have always been something that has held my marriage down, because the majority of the issue I have with my wife have always been issues of trust, transparency, accountability, respect and loyalty.

Some people will say with these things I have listed, that I may be asking for too much, but I can tell whoever would reason that way that it's not too much because am a responsible father/husband that have never for once strayed the family in anyway that will make me lack any of the above stated qualities a man can enjoy from a wife.

Why am I here? Ok.. After enduring so much for 11 years, we are relocating to the UK, she is the main applicant, myself and the 3 children are dependants, she traveled first, leaving myself and the 3 kids behind until she can secure accommodation b4 we leave.

I have heard about countless incidences of how SOME women treat their husbands and the POWER zoned to women in that country which makes it almost impossible for a man with a wife that gives him constant problem to be able to thrive in that country.

I just want to state three peculiar incidences that occured during her 1month stay over there that is already making me feel I have alot to face over there, though I know my God is bigger than anything, I just want people that are over there, or people that are experienced here and all over who are capable of handing a good advise for me on getting there to know how I can fare and withstand what is to come.

Based on the above from the major incidences I have experienced with her, first two weeks of being there, she had gone to check a house b4 heading to school, on her way back to school, she claimed she didn't take enough money and going back home might not be possible, I asked how she would wanna go about it
and she replied saying I will borrow money from Mr Mike, a man she just met at school on her first day of registration. I was like that's wrong, you don't form familiarity with someone you just met in another man's country, I said I will call a friend in liverpool to send you money and you could get your train ticket. She fumed, but I stood my ground and said that's how its going to be. I have asked her to collect a friends account details, since she has not opened an account yet, she said when her class finishes by 8.30pm she'll request details from her friend so the money can be sent. Fast forward to closing period, I messaged her to send me details, she ignored, I called ad she said nobody has an account that I should not worry she will sort herself, I was now like you just got to that country, u have no friends that u know too well to rely on, I am ur hubby and I opened a way for u to get money easily, yet u didn't make any effort to redeem the opportunity, omo she hung up on me then later called back that she gathered few pennies she had to get the ticket, I was now like why didn't u just say this instead of putting me on pressure over how to get money to convey u all the way from london to Luton, over an hour journey at night.

Secondly, on her next school day, she had previously told me prior to her closing hours that her data has finished and she's using schools wifi, that the moment she steps out from school to head home, she won't be having access to internet, etc WhatsApp and all of that, but importantly was to make use of GPS google map, that's what people over there use to navigate their way in order not to get lost, I was like without internet how do u intend to get to ur destination when u know how stressful it was for u getting lost the other day, now the same statement she made was, I will sort myself. I was raged and said woman I will ask my friend to buy u data so u can get home easy and safe, she said no proble, that she's leaving now, I said well since i wont be able to reach you on whats app, I will definitely call you on normal call shortly to give you the data pin to load. She said no P and hung up.

Moments later, my friend had sent me the data pin, na so I begin dey call wifey oo, over 15 missed calls she nor pick. Later she called back and said her phone was in her laptop bag and her hands were frozen so she couldnt put hands in the bag to pick the call and that she didn't even hear it ring.

The issue I posted up there are issues of not being accountable, and attitude of not showing that you don't need me when its not just about that but for security and your well being knowing fully well you are new in the country and proper guidelines needs to be taken.

Another incident happened 3rd week after her arrival, we were video chatting while she was on a train station waiting for train, next thing I noticed was a guy sitting BEHIND her, the guy boldly took a peep into her phone directly, seemingly trying to see who she was on video call with, immediately i called her attention to it, she just smiled and looked back and said silently, nawa some people for this London nor go mind their business. This very day developed a story that transitioned towards few things I will be stating.

The next sunday, I called her in the morin to say hi and all that, next thing I know she dun dey go church, she nor even discuss am with me and na wetin we dn agree on sey we fo jointly choose church wey we go dey go. After church service, she call me sey that guy wey i talk sey dey peep into her phone, sey the guy that very day asked her how long shes been there for, she said, just 3 weeks, sey how come she come take know road when him don dey 3months he nver know road, sey that same guy him coincidentally meet am for the new church wey she come so, sey the guy dey look am, she comot eye, but later the guy come meet am sey are u not the one that showed me way to where I was going. Sey as him meet the guy coincidentally for church, he fit be sey he get why, maybe for job connection or what not. I nor say anything, cos coincidences arent something new in this world. Then the next day, she call me sey that same guy needs an apartment, sey na married guy with 4 kids, but him wife and 1kid dey here, 3 dey nija them nor fit come yet until house is ready, sey him dey ask her if she can help him get someone that can reference for him to get a house, ha him my wife come dey ginger me sey make i help am talk to my friend wey help us reference if him go fit help the guy too. I come sey no problem, she sey she go call the guy now and put us on 3 way call, i sey no p, i come dey wait for call, no call come and madam nor talk again, i come ring her sey hafa u nor do the three way call again? She sey the guy dey work, him nor fit talk,sey she don give the guy my number to call me later, me come sey no p, send him number I go save am down so if he calls i go know sey na him, madam nor gree send number, I come dey wonder sey wetin dey sup sef, normally I nor spose reason ahead, but me my instict dey very strong, i come begin dey put two and two together sey maybe the guy intention was never to get help but to use style dey hit on my madam maybe na why him nor wan talk to me but wan use my madam dey take communicate.

I come ask madam some some questions on previous ish, I come find out sey small lie dey, so I tackler her sey the way she take explain to me about how him meet the guy for train station nor join, she come vex sey me i come am liar, omo as we dey talk for whatsapp, i nor blv sey my madam added this guy to the call without my consent or my knowledge, so as I dey talk, the guy dey the background, i nor even know anything and the dude himself kept quiet, na after the call finish, I see am for call details sey the guy was added to the call, infact the dude even called me directky i nor pick. Now i got very angry, come call madam sey wetin dey sup, u added this dude wey talk sey him dey work him nor fit talk to the call wey me and u dey on and u didnt even notify me, ok lets agree sey if to sey u wan tell me sey u wan add the guy for call sey i nor go gree sey maybe na why u add am without my consent, at least after u add am secretly, u are suppose to talk and sey bae, since u are accusing me wrongly.

I have added the guy to this call so he can clear me out, but she didnt, she just added the guy and the dude himself kept quiet and didnt say a word until I hung up. I got very furious and told her this is the highest level of see finish and dragging in the mud, wetin u want that guy to dey feel like now? She said shes sorry that she only wanted to clear herself, I was now like even if u wanted to clear urself, if that the best way to go about it, the person who is the subject matter is the best person u need to introduce to clear u out? Later on i just bone the matter come apologise sey make we move on, na so she come begin dey yarn plenty, sey she call the guy that my hubby said that the way we met is unreal, sey the guy sef come talk sey wow, so your husband already thinks am sleeping with you, but i cant blame u though, u know u have a big back side, so thoughts like that from him is likely not a surprise, i was hmmmm to hear that, i come tell madam sey if na true this guy talk this thing, shouldnt u already know he has corny itentions, she said well she too dey wonder cos the two times wey them meet she nor wear wetin fit show her bkside so how d guy come take know. The matter end there, next day madam still dey worry me sey shey I go still help d guy, I was like I cant even talk to him, u dun useless me already for him presence, she dey claim sey she nor do anything wrong by adding him to the call, sey the guy know of agency wey fit help me get better job if i arrive, and sey the guy talk sey if me fit connect am to my friend to reference am for house, him go link me up fr the agency. I talk sey i nor dey interested. Omo I weak. Guys I need advise on how to handle issues over there, cos me nor dey take nonsense for nija here, but for there, one needs to chill, but then should it now be sey because we dey live for country wey give woman power, make woman come use that opportunity come dey fumble?

My 2 cents
Forward …
I didn’t read your epistle in detail. Maybe if we had a phone call, I could summarize and respond properly but from I read


You need to have a different mindset when in a relationship abroad. All our African mindset will not work. There have been many incidents of culture shock! From 3rd world countries . Countries in the west and Britain included are liberal in their thinking. So be guarded. I am not saying our African sisters throw all caution to the wind but we all evolve.

Amotolongbo:
All I can read here are
1. A lady who isn’t straight forward
2. A man who feels insecure

A lady who isn’t straightforward will make a man feel insecure. most def

Let me not lie, your wife is giving bad vibes already. Clear this issues very well before you leave ooo!

kbower:
Hi Nlanders

We all know no marriage is all that smooth and rosey, we all that are in it have challenges here and there, and for almost 11 years now, out of tolerance, ruggedity, minding my business in terms of taking care of the family have always been something that has held my marriage down, because the majority of the issue I have with my wife have always been issues of trust, transparency, accountability, respect and loyalty.

Some people will say with these things I have listed, that I may be asking for too much, but I can tell whoever would reason that way that it's not too much because am a responsible father/husband that have never for once strayed the family in anyway that will make me lack any of the above stated qualities a man can enjoy from a wife.

Why am I here? Ok.. After enduring so much for 11 years, we are relocating to the UK, she is the main applicant, myself and the 3 children are dependants, she traveled first, leaving myself and the 3 kids behind until she can secure accommodation b4 we leave.

I have heard about countless incidences of how SOME women treat their husbands and the POWER zoned to women in that country which makes it almost impossible for a man with a wife that gives him constant problem to be able to thrive in that country.

I just want to state three peculiar incidences that occured during her 1month stay over there that is already making me feel I have alot to face over there, though I know my God is bigger than anything, I just want people that are over there, or people that are experienced here and all over who are capable of handing a good advise for me on getting there to know how I can fare and withstand what is to come.

Based on the above from the major incidences I have experienced with her, first two weeks of being there, she had gone to check a house b4 heading to school, on her way back to school, she claimed she didn't take enough money and going back home might not be possible, I asked how she would wanna go about it
and she replied saying I will borrow money from Mr Mike, a man she just met at school on her first day of registration. I was like that's wrong, you don't form familiarity with someone you just met in another man's country, I said I will call a friend in liverpool to send you money and you could get your train ticket. She fumed, but I stood my ground and said that's how its going to be. I have asked her to collect a friends account details, since she has not opened an account yet, she said when her class finishes by 8.30pm she'll request details from her friend so the money can be sent. Fast forward to closing period, I messaged her to send me details, she ignored, I called ad she said nobody has an account that I should not worry she will sort herself, I was now like you just got to that country, u have no friends that u know too well to rely on, I am ur hubby and I opened a way for u to get money easily, yet u didn't make any effort to redeem the opportunity, omo she hung up on me then later called back that she gathered few pennies she had to get the ticket, I was now like why didn't u just say this instead of putting me on pressure over how to get money to convey u all the way from london to Luton, over an hour journey at night.

Secondly, on her next school day, she had previously told me prior to her closing hours that her data has finished and she's using schools wifi, that the moment she steps out from school to head home, she won't be having access to internet, etc WhatsApp and all of that, but importantly was to make use of GPS google map, that's what people over there use to navigate their way in order not to get lost, I was like without internet how do u intend to get to ur destination when u know how stressful it was for u getting lost the other day, now the same statement she made was, I will sort myself. I was raged and said woman I will ask my friend to buy u data so u can get home easy and safe, she said no proble, that she's leaving now, I said well since i wont be able to reach you on whats app, I will definitely call you on normal call shortly to give you the data pin to load. She said no P and hung up.

Moments later, my friend had sent me the data pin, na so I begin dey call wifey oo, over 15 missed calls she nor pick. Later she called back and said her phone was in her laptop bag and her hands were frozen so she couldnt put hands in the bag to pick the call and that she didn't even hear it ring.

The issue I posted up there are issues of not being accountable, and attitude of not showing that you don't need me when its not just about that but for security and your well being knowing fully well you are new in the country and proper guidelines needs to be taken.

Another incident happened 3rd week after her arrival, we were video chatting while she was on a train station waiting for train, next thing I noticed was a guy sitting BEHIND her, the guy boldly took a peep into her phone directly, seemingly trying to see who she was on video call with, immediately i called her attention to it, she just smiled and looked back and said silently, nawa some people for this London nor go mind their business. This very day developed a story that transitioned towards few things I will be stating.

The next sunday, I called her in the morin to say hi and all that, next thing I know she dun dey go church, she nor even discuss am with me and na wetin we dn agree on sey we fo jointly choose church wey we go dey go. After church service, she call me sey that guy wey i talk sey dey peep into her phone, sey the guy that very day asked her how long shes been there for, she said, just 3 weeks, sey how come she come take know road when him don dey 3months he nver know road, sey that same guy him coincidentally meet am for the new church wey she come so, sey the guy dey look am, she comot eye, but later the guy come meet am sey are u not the one that showed me way to where I was going. Sey as him meet the guy coincidentally for church, he fit be sey he get why, maybe for job connection or what not. I nor say anything, cos coincidences arent something new in this world. Then the next day, she call me sey that same guy needs an apartment, sey na married guy with 4 kids, but him wife and 1kid dey here, 3 dey nija them nor fit come yet until house is ready, sey him dey ask her if she can help him get someone that can reference for him to get a house, ha him my wife come dey ginger me sey make i help am talk to my friend wey help us reference if him go fit help the guy too. I come sey no problem, she sey she go call the guy now and put us on 3 way call, i sey no p, i come dey wait for call, no call come and madam nor talk again, i come ring her sey hafa u nor do the three way call again? She sey the guy dey work, him nor fit talk,sey she don give the guy my number to call me later, me come sey no p, send him number I go save am down so if he calls i go know sey na him, madam nor gree send number, I come dey wonder sey wetin dey sup sef, normally I nor spose reason ahead, but me my instict dey very strong, i come begin dey put two and two together sey maybe the guy intention was never to get help but to use style dey hit on my madam maybe na why him nor wan talk to me but wan use my madam dey take communicate.

I come ask madam some some questions on previous ish, I come find out sey small lie dey, so I tackler her sey the way she take explain to me about how him meet the guy for train station nor join, she come vex sey me i come am liar, omo as we dey talk for whatsapp, i nor blv sey my madam added this guy to the call without my consent or my knowledge, so as I dey talk, the guy dey the background, i nor even know anything and the dude himself kept quiet, na after the call finish, I see am for call details sey the guy was added to the call, infact the dude even called me directky i nor pick. Now i got very angry, come call madam sey wetin dey sup, u added this dude wey talk sey him dey work him nor fit talk to the call wey me and u dey on and u didnt even notify me, ok lets agree sey if to sey u wan tell me sey u wan add the guy for call sey i nor go gree sey maybe na why u add am without my consent, at least after u add am secretly, u are suppose to talk and sey bae, since u are accusing me wrongly.

I have added the guy to this call so he can clear me out, but she didnt, she just added the guy and the dude himself kept quiet and didnt say a word until I hung up. I got very furious and told her this is the highest level of see finish and dragging in the mud, wetin u want that guy to dey feel like now? She said shes sorry that she only wanted to clear herself, I was now like even if u wanted to clear urself, if that the best way to go about it, the person who is the subject matter is the best person u need to introduce to clear u out? Later on i just bone the matter come apologise sey make we move on, na so she come begin dey yarn plenty, sey she call the guy that my hubby said that the way we met is unreal, sey the guy sef come talk sey wow, so your husband already thinks am sleeping with you, but i cant blame u though, u know u have a big back side, so thoughts like that from him is likely not a surprise, i was hmmmm to hear that, i come tell madam sey if na true this guy talk this thing, shouldnt u already know he has corny itentions, she said well she too dey wonder cos the two times wey them meet she nor wear wetin fit show her bkside so how d guy come take know. The matter end there, next day madam still dey worry me sey shey I go still help d guy, I was like I cant even talk to him, u dun useless me already for him presence, she dey claim sey she nor do anything wrong by adding him to the call, sey the guy know of agency wey fit help me get better job if i arrive, and sey the guy talk sey if me fit connect am to my friend to reference am for house, him go link me up fr the agency. I talk sey i nor dey interested. Omo I weak. Guys I need advise on how to handle issues over there, cos me nor dey take nonsense for nija here, but for there, one needs to chill, but then should it now be sey because we dey live for country wey give woman power, make woman come use that opportunity come dey fumble?

Bros i ga do your pigin.
I feel your madam is okay but you are a type of man that shows care to anything.

You are overthinking the whole thing. She's on the ground, she's not a toddler or teenager. Stop micromanaging her movements. All I would say about those of you saying the OP needs to remain an African man, whatever that means, left me share the story of two Nigerian families living in the UK with you. I know these families personally.

Family A: Husband (in his late 30s) was a Consultant Urologist in a university teaching hospital in Western Nigeria. Wife (in her mid 30s) was a Nursing Sister in the same hospital. Wife secured a nursing job in the UK, and the husband and children joined her. For the first year, the husband had no job as he was writing exams. The entire family was living on wife's income. This was 4 years ago. As I write, they are both working, have bought a 4-bed detached house, each driving 22 plate cars, and kids doing well in school.

Family B: Both husband and wife came to the UK as students. They relocated to the UK 15years ago when I met them. Husband did a masters in architecture and wife studied MSc Computer Science. As their visa was expiring, wife had better chances than husband but husband wasn't prepared to be a dependent of the wife, he scuttled the process. They both ended up on asylum claim...they ended up on benefits as they couldn't work whilst claim was being considered. Given they've got a big family (n=6) they were given 4 bed house+benefits. In time they were given papers but had become used to life on benefits. As I write, both of them remained on benefits, jobless. If the wife was my sister, I would have asked her to neglect the husband's voice and chase her dreams. As I write, her dreams have been completely dashed and derailed by her husband. With a BSc Honours in Computer Science from UI, and MSc degree in Computing from a Russell Group Uni in the UK, she's a full time wife and benefit dependent.

OP. Allow your wife to be. When the time is right and she's got an accommodation, relocate and make a life you don't and won't have in Nigeria, in the UK.

vickydevoka:

My brother is about to do same thing I begged him he refused

Show him this thread.

Ebubu:
OP if you must go on with relocating to join her, swear with your mama life you’ll never hit her, secretly put CCTV ( very tiny) cameras all around your house just in case when she starts lying against you in court that you beat her, become more humble, cook more as the husband, and reduce your air of authority.



these are the only ways you can co-exist as a man in the abroad, if you know you can’t do any of these, stay back in nigeria.

guy abeg listen to this manchi just find way install cctv in protection of ur future evidence and remember not to allow her knw that uv done such a thing if not another court case,


and never lay a hand on her just play to the law of that land as a man and correct her when necessary,

kbower:


Bro the deed is done already, for the visa procedure we had to make her the applicant, cos women are attended to faster and guaranteed to be given visa. I definitely feel something that I dont know but only suspicious of is going on there judging from the incidences that happened, but then man go sojunu.

The way your police wants to catch thief is not the right way to go about it. You're following the thief upandan to see if she will steal something, oga thieves don't steal that way. You have suspected something, you have to go about it in a way that the thief will not suspect that you're tracking her. Calm down and get yourself to the UK. How will my wife be comfortable around a man that COULD SAY that her arse is BIG. That statement VEX ME on your behalf but be calm and find your way to the UK.

dustmalik:

I was also wondering the same thing. OP had 27M, so why hellbent on japa-ring? With that kind of money, you can do so much here in Naija.

If you dig deeper, you will find that it was the wife that pushed for them to leave, now he is at her mercy.

I dey tell u. If anything happens here na him loose. And it looks like something will happen.

My advice is to get yourself to the uk, forget all that woman get power shit, when you get here, jobs Dey plenty and you will be making more than her. She go humble.. the country still Dey shark her na why, when you come here and make money the respect go come..

You are really very stupid for ignoring your wife.
You are making a big mistake.
Your wife is in the UK for just few weeks and you are already suspecting her of infidelity.
What kind of a woman was she when she was in Nigeria?
Your wife hasn’t changed. She is just adjusting to the new environment.
Stop listening to people in Nigeria who have no slightest idea of what it’s like to live in the UK.
Your wife has a lot of adjustments to do and so do you.
You will never realise the type of culture and way of life your wife just entered into.
She need all the help she can get.
Don’t make her life difficult because you are feeling insecure.
I have lived in a different country in Europe for over two decades and presently relocating to England in the next few weeks and I can tell you your wife needs your support, and not you showing some useless attitude that is going to break your home.
Go and join your wife ASAP and stop grumbling about who your wife talks to or relate with in the UK.
Whenever your wife tells you she is sorting out things on her own, just trust her.
She would have to make many on the fly decisions that she won’t have time to get your opinion. Trust her decisions.
Few weeks ago I went to the UK with a list of areas to check properties, having done all my research online.
I parked my car at the car park beside KFC to use the rest room.
On my way back I saw people physically dealing and using drugs beside my car. I saw another man emptying the content of someone’s truck into his empty truck and zoom off when I said hello to him. This was in broad day light. I knew immediately I couldn’t live in such area.
I had to make many decisions without even discussing it with my wife.
Trust your wife. She is not cheating on you or disrespectful. She is not undermining you as her husband.
Living in the UK requires that she has to be independent and that has nothing to do with you.
Always offer your support and if she tells you she is ok then let her be.
Stop listening to clowns on Nairaland who would gladly trade place with you.
Don’t distract your wife’s mental health and studies with stupid attitude.
If you want to talk send me Dm.
God bless you.

kbower:


This is exactly what I did over the last 2 days now, and guess what, she has been stalking me with calls. I only call her when there is something important to discuss, but calls based on, i miss u and all of that nor even dey again, the moment she noticed I have drifted from showing affection over calls, she started bombarding me with calls complaining that I dont call her.

[quote author=Amotolongbo post=117961393]All I can read here are
1. A lady who isn’t straight forward
2. A man who feels insecure
[/quote
There is no word like insecure, if someone do not give you any reason to doubt, why would you suspect?? The word insecure is bullshit.

vickydevoka:

You have not been to abroad. A man and woman works equally. So him must clean poo

You guys kuku want OP to have HBP finally, does he write like someone who will clean poo? I don't think he's ready for the shift.

You are calling her too much hence why she is not answering you sometimes ...How was the state of your marriage when she left was it strong ?
I will tell you now there are guys in the uk that specifically target married women just to knack them ..the guy has intentions of boning your wife that is why he is not calling you and avoiding any form of communication with you .
Follow your instincts because i can tell you you are very right to suspect her ..she is getting attention and there are plenty hungry guys in the uk very desperate .

dazzlingd:
I don’t know how you men agree to become dependent to a woman and follow her to UK, aren’t you a man. The African in you says you are the man and a woman should follow and support your dreams not the other way. You cannot import western standard to an African, there won’t be balance. When Nigerian girls get abroad, the freedom run them crazy and they can’t sustain it.

Dependent doesn’t mean he is depending on the woman, she is the one schooling, that’s all, the rest are dependent, that’s how it is.

Okonandmary:
You will lose your wife soon.
Just a little freedom and she is misplacing her priorities.

Sometimes i winder why it is difficult for some women to play along as a team reaching a goal with their husbands

I will advice you not to worry yourself, the cure for this isn't to run yourself down with hypertension. Stop caring and acting like you cant live without her.

,please follow this OP advise, there is no way you will escape Cheat from your wife,her attitude really shows she will Cheat on you sooner or later

Good to know we still have people that thinks this way.

Omishor2020:
Lol

There is no school that lectures finish by 830. Thats where i stopped reading anyway.

Most lecturers only work 8 to 4/5 range.

Just be ready to deal with her when you come around.

Get a good job so you could earn more than her, pray and observe she is humble.

I'm single but the number 1 thing i want from a woman is humility; I'm an humble person myself and i want an humble wife to relate and raise our kids