Gsg

tafabaloo:
Confrontation and politeness do not go together.
Pastors are not God. Endeavour to be your own pastor, and In matter like this a respectable family member could have amicably resolved the matter without taking the glory for himself.
Above all....forgive the Pastor and move on....u brought the ant infested wood into your home.

another angle

Mummytoo:

Is it wrong to confront him....
Coz I will act like I'm going to testify and correct that wrong impression he said about my husband

your fellow human (in the disguise of a pastor) lied on the so called alter and called your husband a violent sadistic woman beater in public and you could not silence him on the spot to correct the impression. you even bowed down to him so he could lay his demonic hands on you for prayer that only glorifies his false story and you left in silence.

Bloody sheep.

superCleanworks:

someone called your husband a violent sadistic woman beater in public and you could not silence him on the spot.

Bloody sheep.

They removed the mic from my mouth when I started talking

phemmyfour:
Confront him first, if he's not apologetic, you can inform the church about the true story

But you already know whose version the church would believe.It’s like a spell should we revisit the Coza scandal of a few years back?.

Mummytoo:
Good morning nlanders

Happy Sunday to u all

I'm eager to know if its wrong to confront a pastor, because all my life I hate going pastors for anything, something happened on Monday, I didn't know who else to talk to ....so I went to the alter to pray and met with my pastor, I explained what happened between my husband and I and he settled the matter sweetly . I was so happy to have peace and joy back in my marriage till yesterday (Saturday) pastor called me out of that plenty congregation and told d church everything including what my husband has been hiding for years, he even added more things that didn't even happen to the story😂. I was just quiet and respectful since I wasn't expecting him to behave like that.

He prayed for me and I just left, he started getting angry that I can't even praise for my healing me or dancing round, I was just shocked at everything happening I left to the backyard and later went in again.

Immediately I got home I told my husband how he's image has been tarnished in church for what he didn't do, we had a misunderstanding and pastor said he flogged me (that didn't happen)

Is it wrong to confront him....
Coz I will act like I'm going to testify and correct that wrong impression he said about my husband

Just one time experience with pastor is killing me like this

Did Paul not confront Peter about the Gentiles treatment

What a church!

bakobenjamin198:
Are you saying, you had never experienced him exhibiting such attitude on someone else's case that you should have learnt from that, to make you distance your family problems from him? Well, that is what you get when you come in contact with pastors that sees themselves as God. They always want to take the glory for every act, did or favour they render to people.

I don't go close to him so I wouldn't know, its last night I started suspecting, I have learnt my lessons

Mummytoo:
Good morning nlanders

Happy Sunday to u all

I'm eager to know if its wrong to confront a pastor, because all my life I hate going pastors for anything, something happened on Monday, I didn't know who else to talk to ....so I went to the alter to pray and met with my pastor, I explained what happened between my husband and I and he settled the matter sweetly . I was so happy to have peace and joy back in my marriage till yesterday (Saturday) pastor called me out of that plenty congregation and told d church everything including what my husband has been hiding for years, he even added more things that didn't even happen to the story😂. I was just quiet and respectful since I wasn't expecting him to behave like that.

He prayed for me and I just left, he started getting angry that I can't even praise for my healing me or dancing round, I was just shocked at everything happening I left to the backyard and later went in again.

Immediately I got home I told my husband how he's image has been tarnished in church for what he didn't do, we had a misunderstanding and pastor said he flogged me (that didn't happen)

Is it wrong to confront him....
Coz I will act like I'm going to testify and correct that wrong impression he said about my husband

Just one time experience with pastor is killing me like this

run from that church.u remain there u miss heaven.

tfelicityk:


If he is actually called as claimed, he wouldn't have used your matter as a topic to preach in the church.
He needs more wisdom, understanding and application of knowledge in handling matters. He didn't not seek you and your husband consent before he broadcasted it to the congregation.
Confront him politely and let him know that you and your households are not happy with him for bringing your matter out to the congregation with the lies he added to it. If he apologizes immediately, kindly forgives him. If he does otherwise leave him for God to handle him in His own way.
Have a pleasant day

Thank you dear, I have forgiven him in my heart, let God be the judge

dnawah:
run from that church.u remain there u miss heaven.

she is probably there right now with her jotter writing prayer points from the fancy suit lier.

many thousands of them like that in church to the point it has become a deadly game of silence. first to speak will be publicly shamed and demonized.

Tutu82:

That you added “politely” speaks to your character as a decent and good hearted person.
This pastor is a human like you and his actions were disrespectful and not necessary putting your family affairs out there without your permission.
What happened to there is a sister here who had problems with her husband and i solved it why call you?.
I feel very upset on your behalf and you need to think about if you want to remain a member of that church.Confronting him is a waste of your precious time he will spew nonsense and upset you more…The effrontery of these so called men of God and religion as a whole in Africa is ridiculous and we give them the power.

Thank you dear, on the judgment day we shall answer to everything we have done

Mummytoo:
Good morning nlanders

Happy Sunday to u all

I'm eager to know if its wrong to confront a pastor, because all my life I hate going pastors for anything, something happened on Monday, I didn't know who else to talk to ....so I went to the alter to pray and met with my pastor, I explained what happened between my husband and I and he settled the matter sweetly . I was so happy to have peace and joy back in my marriage till yesterday (Saturday) pastor called me out of that plenty congregation and told d church everything including what my husband has been hiding for years, he even added more things that didn't even happen to the story😂. I was just quiet and respectful since I wasn't expecting him to behave like that.

He prayed for me and I just left, he started getting angry that I can't even praise for my healing me or dancing round, I was just shocked at everything happening I left to the backyard and later went in again.

Immediately I got home I told my husband how he's image has been tarnished in church for what he didn't do, we had a misunderstanding and pastor said he flogged me (that didn't happen)

Is it wrong to confront him....
Coz I will act like I'm going to testify and correct that wrong impression he said about my husband

Just one time experience with pastor is killing me like this

Save that energy, use the energy to go to your husband and discuss with him. I mean let him know that you love him and never expected you guys issue to be discussed outside the marriage, let both of you see how you can learn from this and 3nsure it never repeat itself again. Then if you have some energy left, get some elders in the church and tell express your displeasure.

Una go just dey fear anyhow. Na d same power God give the pasitor ,HE give you too. You people fear pastor more than you fear God. SMH

Tutu82:

But you already know whose version the church would believe.It’s like a spell should we revisit the Coza scandal of a few years back?.

Few members will still believe her. Not every Coza members stayed after the scandal.

Let her change church after telling the congregation their side of the story.

Your husband should be the one that confronts him. He should also demand that he put the record right before the congregation

WantsandMore:
don't confront him, report him to the elders of the church and demand an Apology from specifically he should apologize to your husband in a congregation so as to remove the stigma of battery he has artificially created, if he refuses & the eldrs have refused to do anything about it, do not wary, go to God in prayers but most especially apologize to your husband and mean it in action, meanwhile, now you understand the type of person your pastor is, share anything with him in cauton.

Every one is scared of him, u know those kind of pastors that what they speaks comes to pass so nobody dare correct him or confronts him, he usually teaches us that confronting a man of God is a sin that comes with great punishment, but I don't believe it because I haven't seen it in the bible, the bible is my manual for life

treatise:

The Bible says Ye are gods ; we have equal accesses to God if you know it and believe.

U know nobody is a graduate in the institution of marriage, sometimes counseling is needed, I speak to God directly because God is my father

Lol

Pastors in what ever capacity hate being corrected....
It is like you are watering down their righteousness, they hate it.
Wether politely or not, they hate being corrected.....
Especially the ones wey carry title for head, na Dem worse pass.

Mummytoo:
Good morning nlanders

Happy Sunday to u all

I'm eager to know if its wrong to confront a pastor, because all my life I hate going pastors for anything, something happened on Monday, I didn't know who else to talk to ....so I went to the alter to pray and met with my pastor, I explained what happened between my husband and I and he settled the matter sweetly . I was so happy to have peace and joy back in my marriage till yesterday (Saturday) pastor called me out of that plenty congregation and told d church everything including what my husband has been hiding for years, he even added more things that didn't even happen to the story😂. I was just quiet and respectful since I wasn't expecting him to behave like that.

He prayed for me and I just left, he started getting angry that I can't even praise for my healing me or dancing round, I was just shocked at everything happening I left to the backyard and later went in again.

Immediately I got home I told my husband how he's image has been tarnished in church for what he didn't do, we had a misunderstanding and pastor said he flogged me (that didn't happen)

Is it wrong to confront him....
Coz I will act like I'm going to testify and correct that wrong impression he said about my husband

Just one time experience with pastor is killing me like this

Time to leave the church sis. He isn’t a man of God

Kukutenla:

This is obviously the effect of going to mushroom churches lacking strong doctrine and administration.
I can bet you no Catholic, Baptist, Anglican, Methodist or doctrinal sound pentecostal Church pastor will do this.
They are taught this kind of things in the seminary

That is what I know too, that whatever is being counseled or confessed stays within them...so u can imagine the shock, I refused to get up till he pointed me direct

Yes but don’t judge

[quote author=Kukutenla post=122067827]
This is obviously the effect of going to mushroom churches lacking strong doctrine and administration.
I can bet you no Catholic, Baptist, Anglican, Methodist or doctrinal sound pentecostal Church pastor will do this.
They are taught this kind of things in the seminary[/quote
Do not bet too soon on some Catholic priests.

TOPMAN4LIFE:

Some pastors use human feelings and sentiments to deal with their members, some don't allow Holy Spirit to guide their actions but want to show off as miracle workers instead of allowing God takes the glory.
I'm very careful with pastor since they are also human being like me and not God .
As christians, develop serious and personal relationship with God in prayers, reading and obeying the Bible and you will have less or no private issues to run after pastors.
I was embarrassed for a mature guy one Sunday when pastor called him out and asked church to pray for him after pastor has shared part of his secret story to the church.
Some pastors don't know how people are feeling ashamed of their situations but share it with them on trust

The trust keeps breaking and breaking, the church is supposed to be a place of solace, comfort, counsel, joy, a place of meat, and many more but now, no way they are ready to even expose that u are a beggar.

God will help us

alizma:

Save that energy, use the energy to go to your husband and discuss with him. I mean let him know that you love him and never expected you guys issue to be discussed outside the marriage, let both of you see how you can learn from this and 3nsure it never repeat itself again. Then if you have some energy left, get some elders in the church and tell express your displeasure.

I discussed with my husband immediately I got home, i pray no serious issue comes again, we learn everyday, God help us
Thank u dear

Many African Pastors assume the place of God these days. If you're not genuflecting before them, they see it as arrogance.

They insult people and expect people to lick their arses.

It has now become like a cult. Other pastors will condemn you, even when they know that their friend (your current pastor) is wrong.

I say this from experience.

I remember the 80s. Pastors were humane and gentle, filled with God's spirit.

These days , they are very insulting, haughty and arrogant.

My advice to this poster is to quietly leave that church and go somewhere else . As for me, I rarely attend church anymore these days. Today is even a Sunday and I'm at home.

If this poster tries to accost that pastor, she will be lynched.

[quote author=Tutu82 post=122068727][/quote]
Such person can be reported to the authorities and appropriately sanctioned
The case of Fr Mbaka is a pointer

It depends on how you see them, to some they are untouchable, some even worship them, some leave their thinking faculty and accept whatever they say or tell them to do no matter how it may look, they are gods to some people. But if you know he's just human like you who isn't immune to human flaws, you will approach him just as you would do to other people, respect yourself and you will be respected, and try to clear what he might have said wrongly about your husband. As adults, when someone brings an issue to you, you don't need to be told what to divulge to others or not, not to talk of a spiritual head/leader, but instead he went public about it, even added sauce to make the gist sweeter, interesting

Mummytoo:


That is what I know too, that whatever is being counseled or confessed stays within them...so u can imagine the shock, I refused to get up till he pointed me direct

You should look for a better church before you get misguided.
The secret of the Lord are with those who fear him.... A pastor worth his salt is a secret keeper not a tale bearer

You’re a reckless woman, a naive woman, a stupid woman, you’re everything a man should never marry if he wants to go far in life and if he wants so sort of peace knowing fully well his wife can handle the home.

You carried your marriage matter to pastor cause you worship pastor , now same pastor attacked you yet you said they removed the mic when you were about to speak can’t you see how you brought shame and disrespect to your family ? And you’re still saying you want to confront him politely , you’re saying no one can confront him cause what he says comes to pass , where do men find naive and dumb women like you Omo I rather stay single than marry someone like you Omo you’re not intelligent at all!

Your mumu too much. You’re timid, lack self esteem, and not smart obviously. The best bet for you is to discover yourself, reinvent yourself and go wan aura of self respect so people can treat you highly . Omo I had to login in to comment after many months of not commenting on this platform.

If you love yourself get out of that church, and stay off church for awhile till you reinvent yourself cause I’m sure you don’t even know who you are yet and this will affect you in every area of your life people will never respect you ! That’s why your husband don’t even respect you!

And some people saying the husband should meet the pastor ?? The husband has no business with him. The stupid pastor can go Bleep himself

Onyiiobi7735:
Go ahead and confront the pastor.He is a human being, not a deity, and shouldn't be treated like one.Give him a resounding warning over his actions, and then start keeping your distance from him.
Getting unnecessarily close to some of these pastors,cause all this unwanted interference in the lives of the church members.That's why I don't like getting close to any pastor for any reason on a personal level.

Well said brother