Jossyfine:
All the comments above have not actually hit the nail in the right place. The major issue is that African marriages are not laced with romance and affection.
How do I mean?
* Most couple stop showing affection to each other once they start bearing kids and over see finish has crawled into their marriage.
* African couples rarely make out for themselves alone in terms of going on dates ( at least once in a while)
* Marriage is what you put in it ,that’s what you get, you should learn to do things together ie weekends both man and wife can create time to put the huz in order( not by force) but with love cuz it creates bond between couples.
*You can create low budget vacation for just you both without the kids.
*Once in a while try having sex outside the huz, look for an affordable hotel around ur area and maybe do just one night.
* Marriage shouldn’t be about the kids, cuz have noticed what most couple talk about the kids, bills and family issues.Spice it up a little and gist about ur selves, probably the sex you had the previous night😜
* Let there be stewardship ( you guys should always review ur attitude towards each other by asking if each is meeting up expectations etc)*

*Most African couple rarely send romantic messages unlike when they were dating when most times you wake up to see sweet soul piercing messages from ur lover. But in marriage all the messages are for purchases of huz hold items.

Marriage is sweet but not in Africa. Africa marriages are very boring😭

Am just wondering how I survived 10 freaking years 😳😳😳and it’s still counting 😔

You have a very good recipe for marriage but most of the things u put up there may not see the light of the day especially if either of the partners has unforgiven spirit. It is usually issues that estrange a wife and her husband. unresolved issues are big killers of romance in marriage. Causes and effects usually have their roles in marriage and that may hamper most of the good plans they have for each other. In a nut shell, happy marriage is between two forgiving partners.

I thought dey say love is blind?

There is an absolute law of Karma.

What you just wrote below is a real- life story of a woman's confession to her husband.

Her daughter in-law showed her own son direct hell fire.

She was in her late 80's when she made this confession. She lost her son due to an underlying heart diseases triggered by been hypertensive from the his wife's deliberate frustration.

Guide your heart on the prayers you pray for yourself.

Using a Man's children a bait or payback even when he provided thier material needs when he was in his prime is a direct curse on the Woman.

Be careful what you pray for

LilMissFavvy:
Definitely not all men lose interest in their wives in future. However any woman who finds herself in this situation should calm down, draw the children to yourself alone, tell them the pain their dad is causing and make sure you have one or two sources of income. Then as the man begins to get older, then you can go ahead and punish him very well. This is where people begin to talk and blame women, they forget the man is reaping what he sowed. Matchew

There is an absolute law of Karma.

What you just wrote below is a real- life story of a woman's confession to her grandchildren.

Her daughter in-law showed her own son direct hell fire.

She was in her late 80's when she made this confession. She lost her son due to an underlying heart diseases triggered by been hypertensive from the his wife's deliberate frustration.

Guide your heart on the prayers you pray for yourself.

Using a Man's children as bait or payback even when he provided thier material needs when he was in his prime is a direct curse on the Woman.

Be careful what you pray for.

LilMissFavvy:
Definitely not all men lose interest in their wives in future. However any woman who finds herself in this situation should calm down, draw the children to yourself alone, tell them the pain their dad is causing and make sure you have one or two sources of income. Then as the man begins to get older, then you can go ahead and punish him very well. This is where people begin to talk and blame women, they forget the man is reaping what he sowed. Matchew

EriMma1:


This their case and most of the ones I've seen is not money. The men have clearly lost interest.
You'll see them sitting with other people outside gisting and laughing while their wives will be alone sitting all by herself. So sad.

Very true. This submission of yours. But do you know the reason? Interests! When the Men sit and laugh together keeping the wifey away, what do they discuss? Can the women also weigh in on the topic of discussion with same expertise?

Men like Sports a lot, Politics too and may be just be men sometimes, women don't readily fit in.

In this life just know that you can't please any fvcking human being, if at all you're doing anything, it should be for your own good and self confidence.

If you like bleach your skin , do bumbum and the likes , if he wants to dump you , he won't hesitate to dump you for mgbeke .

Women will be doing all kinds of crazy things , how many things are the men doing to please a woman ? Before you make your relationship solid , you better ask your man , if he's truly satisfied with the way you are.

After giving birth, your man should also help you and provide tips on how to stay fit .

If you die today , tomorrow you'll be replaced sharply with a shapeless woman at that .

YinkaOlusesi16:
That's why couples need prayer

And he said the man in his instance was a Pastor..🙆🏽

EriMma1:


So what do you suggest the married woman do to get their husbands attention and fully attracted to them?

Practical tips o.
Types of outfits suitable for indoor parole and other tips on their looks.

Men are POLYGAMOUS in nature, simple..
Even if you are Agbani Darego and Beyonce rolled into one,most men would still wander..
Heck,Jay Z cheated on Beyonce..😂

Sunmolar:


Bro!

I have 2 brothers n a sister. I have safe upto 5 million naira to start her visa n pay part of her school fees. Though she is in fina year. Bringing your sister is better to us, Canada or UK is better. They country is for women and single men. When ever you decide to marry as a man , you will loose till you leave her. As soon as my uncle ( my mother younger brother)left his wife , he sponsored 2 of us. And sending money anyhow. But when he is married even call is very hard. He pays all the bill for peace to rain. At some point he couldn't take it, he got a better job in Canada and divorced her. Money come choke everywhere.

frozen70:


Any couple you find in this categories are actually living as flat mates and not husband and wife

Though men wants to taste what other women have out there and once they get it especially the ones that are ready to give him hot hot, the one at home becomes less relevant to him

While she is still faithful and looking forward to being with him and Stay close to him at home, he is busy avoiding her because he got a big fish outside

By the time she discovers that he is not giving her the attention she wants, she will face her directions towards the children who will never ignore her and find solace in them

By the time the man is getting old, he starts coming close to the wife, meanwhile she is already done with him but still living with him

That's when the man will become lonely while he is married to his wife

You can only harvest what you sow that's what this life will offer you

Oil dey your head. You have said it all

YinkaOlusesi16:
That's why couples need prayer

Being familiar with Bible quotes in Africa especially means you're "intelligent," but that is not the case. It's important to note that personal responsibility for one's actions should not be overshadowed by spiritual interpretations alone. It is crucial to remember that not every elimination or negative outcome can be attributed solely to the influence of the Devil. Instead, individuals should learn to take ownership of their choices and actions, understanding that they have a role to play in shaping their own lives. While challenging situations may arise, it is essential to avoid oversimplifying them as purely the work of external forces. Balancing faith with personal responsibility is key, as we acknowledge that God's ways surpass our comprehension while also recognizing the importance of our own agency and accountability. Marriage is more physical than you can imagine.

A terrible character from a husband or wife will tear the marriage apart.

EriMma1:


This their case and most of the ones I've seen is not money. The men have clearly lost interest.
You'll see them sitting with other people outside gisting and laughing while their wives will be alone sitting all by herself. So sad.

Without mincing words, the wife might probably be a forceful person or a quarrelsome person.

isabi2lof:


Abegi, even men with pot bellies without given birth are also talking, what of the ones with good shape

That's how your lot body shame women and allow them to go under the knife , hence leading to some death cases.

Women went under de knife, no body forced them to. Nigeria is a country that body shame people. All my life I have been body shamed by more women than men, either I'm short, or pot belly or I'm too dark or my nose flat . All na women. So stop doing it as if women are holy

Socratiz:
Your assertion here is replete with conjectures. You saw one family where the husband is avoiding the wife and you assume it's the same with all families. Even if this is prevalent where you stay, it doesn't mean it's the same everywhere.

There are couples who don't avoid each bother after many years of marriage. In fact, the longer their marriage, the stronger the bond between them.

Couples whose marital bond weakens after a few years must have inherent issues which either they are not aware of, or they choose to ignore. They could also be battling with character flaws.

If you expect your marriage to be peaceful and joyfu, that is what you will experience. But if you leave the back door open, the you will find reason to backtrack and use the door.

The type of marriage you chose to build is the type of marriage you will have.

By the way, I have been married for over 32 years and neither myself not my wife has lost interest in each other.

WORD !

Women stop respecting their husband. they feel they have gotten children so the respect disappear Men stop loveing ntheir wives because they dont respect them.

PDJT:


-You and your wife are quite active. Would both of you like to join swingers club?

I don’t want to believe this thing has gotten to Nigeria

Jman06:
Most women become unattractive once married. That's why married men cheat.

Imagine seeing one hippopotamus with oversized grandma panties everyday. The man is bound to lose interest in her. If not for children and what the society would say, most married men would chase their wives away after few years of marriage.

Men typically wouldn't cheat because a woman has grown fat. There are fat women who still have their husbands faithful.

MEN WILL CHEAT ON WOMEN WHO DO NOT GIVE THEM PEACE OF MIND. What you term as cheating, an unhappy married man calls it getting peace of mind. Sad reality

successcard:


Being familiar with Bible quotes in Africa especially means you're "intelligence," but that is not the case. It's important to note that personal responsibility for one's actions should not be overshadowed by spiritual interpretations alone. It is crucial to remember that not every elimination or negative outcome can be attributed solely to the influence of the Devil. Instead, individuals should learn to take ownership of their choices and actions, understanding that they have a role to play in shaping their own lives. While challenging situations may arise, it is essential to avoid oversimplifying them as purely the work of external forces. Balancing faith with personal responsibility is key, as we acknowledge that God's ways surpass our comprehension while also recognizing the importance of our own agency and accountability. Marriage is more physical than you can imagine.

A terrible character from a husband or wife will tear the marriage apart.

Oil dey ya head.

Jossyfine:
All the comments above have not actually hit the nail in the right place. The major issue is that African marriages are not laced with romance and affection.
How do I mean?
* Most couple stop showing affection to each other once they start bearing kids and over see finish has crawled into their marriage.
* African couples rarely make out for themselves alone in terms of going on dates ( at least once in a while)
* Marriage is what you put in it ,that’s what you get, you should learn to do things together ie weekends both man and wife can create time to put the huz in order( not by force) but with love cuz it creates bond between couples.
*You can create low budget vacation for just you both without the kids.
*Once in a while try having sex outside the huz, look for an affordable hotel around ur area and maybe do just one night.
* Marriage shouldn’t be about the kids, cuz have noticed what most couple talk about the kids, bills and family issues.Spice it up a little and gist about ur selves, probably the sex you had the previous night😜
* Let there be stewardship ( you guys should always review ur attitude towards each other by asking if each is meeting up expectations etc)*

*Most African couple rarely send romantic messages unlike when they were dating when most times you wake up to see sweet soul piercing messages from ur lover. But in marriage all the messages are for purchases of huz hold items.

Marriage is sweet but not in Africa. Africa marriages are very boring😭

Am just wondering how I survived 10 freaking years 😳😳😳and it’s still counting 😔

You are so on point with your analysis...

buJu234:
Sex can't keep a marriage,

what does is understanding and working towards a common vision..

And this is easier if u marry a friend!

because immediately after marriage the woman pussy depreciates in value by 50%, with children 70% and age 90%.

Also, economic hardship, looking for money, office politics etc.. kills a man's sex drive by 99.5% especially to his wife..

Marry your friend na see finish. That's the worst. Marry your lover simple. Make woman love u pass makes it easier. Don't go hard to make a lady yours

Glock22:


I don’t want to believe this thing has gotten to Nigeria

You will be shocked with what is going on in Lagos Island...it is in Nigeria o

When a woman feels so comfortable that she doesn't push for continuous upgrade of self and self-worth.

Starts looking dirty because you have become a mother

Doesn't spice herself and her life to keep enticing her husband on per minute basis.

Became less productive and resourceful in thought and action because you are married.

Voom your husband will leave you were you dropped yourself.

Women update yourself and your life...

EriMma1:


For some after 5 yrs but at the most, 10yrs they begin to act like she's a sibling.

Some men would even consider her as his mum and call her mummy,using "e" for her instead of "o" of he's yoruba

Jossyfine:
All the comments above have not actually hit the nail in the right place. The major issue is that African marriages are not laced with romance and affection.
How do I mean?
* Most couple stop showing affection to each other once they start bearing kids and over see finish has crawled into their marriage.
* African couples rarely make out for themselves alone in terms of going on dates ( at least once in a while)
* Marriage is what you put in it ,that’s what you get, you should learn to do things together ie weekends both man and wife can create time to put the huz in order( not by force) but with love cuz it creates bond between couples.
*You can create low budget vacation for just you both without the kids.
*Once in a while try having sex outside the huz, look for an affordable hotel around ur area and maybe do just one night.
* Marriage shouldn’t be about the kids, cuz have noticed what most couple talk about the kids, bills and family issues.Spice it up a little and gist about ur selves, probably the sex you had the previous night😜
* Let there be stewardship ( you guys should always review ur attitude towards each other by asking if each is meeting up expectations etc)*

*Most African couple rarely send romantic messages unlike when they were dating when most times you wake up to see sweet soul piercing messages from ur lover. But in marriage all the messages are for purchases of huz hold items.

Marriage is sweet but not in Africa. Africa marriages are very boring😭

Am just wondering how I survived 10 freaking years 😳😳😳and it’s still counting 😔

Fact!

Lol, it's all about the way you package yourself as a woman. Firstly, shape maintenance is key here, you will some women after child birth like this, e go be like say na 10 pikin don drop for their body, and you will see some women wey be say like 5 pikin don komot for their body, yet, you go think say them never born one, I understand the fact that after childbirth, 90percent of women tend to loose shape, but at least, try as much as possible to keep in shape. And also, good hygiene is another thing to be mindful of, as a married woman, you shouldn't joke with the way you cater for your home, and it starts from while your still single (olomoge) you will see some girls, to even bath, sweep, cook and even do laundry is a problem. All they do is to sleep, wake, press phone, chop. Haha, why nah? When you appear and look nice, Oloun, your husband go dey find you more attractive as each day passes by nii, for men wey dey contended sha, and more so, make our women learn to dey buy and wear sexy clothes, no be say make you dey tie rapper up and down like maids, why nah? Wear sexy bum shots, dey scatter your husband brain every time, Baba no go ever look outside or get tired of you, una use each other till death nii😜💯✌️

iamrealdeji:
Some men would even consider her as his mum and call her mummy,using "e" for her instead of "o" of he's yoruba

Exactly! So annoying. Or they'll say, madam. Why call your wife madam?

That's what happened when you are stucked with one woman. In years, You will definitely get tired of her.

God that knows us best, said we should marry more than one for a reason.

Just stop and use your brain you will see why.

mcprince32:
Late last night my wife woke me up with a question" Why are you men heartless and wicked" I|was confused. How, what have I done? She started telling me of her neighbor whose husband got another girl pregnant. I listened with Keen interest. After all said, I sympathized with the woman. And wify resumed,
Enraged, furious,
I'm just saying my own now bc any man who try that rubush with me will not go scot free. I will disable him. Even the girl will regret her actions for life.
I asked, are you suspecting me?
Or did she tell you I did it with her husband?
Did the girl tell you something about me?
She said No ooo .
I'm just saying my own.
I just don't want wahala.
I then asked for permission.
Can I now continue with my sleep?
She endorsed it.
Then I came out of that confrontation a Victor.
The end of my episode.

If you're married, there are life time episodes of such.
Deal with it by love and understanding
Thanks

Hope you are not living in pain. No forget cup de full

YinkaOlusesi16:
That's why couples need prayer

So everything is prayers! You can't even think outside the box! Na wa oh

ViceGovernor:
It's the law of diminishing marginal utility that's at play.

As a consumer consumes more and more unit of a particular commodity, satisfaction will increase up to a certain point whereby decrease in satisfaction will set as a result of the continuous consumption of additional unit of the same commodity.

After 10 or more years it may vary according to taste and some other factors....the husband must have reached the pinnacle of enjoyment he gets from the union from that point forward the marriage can only retrogress.
It's happening right in my own house but divorce is not an option and I am closely learning from my parents 😌 I am very good at observing.

🤣

ghiloman28:
Average women are just problematic no matter how good you are to them expecially ladies of nowadays. You must be very lucky to find one good one.
Sometimes I feel those that don’t have wife at home are enjoying

lol

Until you know exactly what's the man's problem it will be hard to assume or conclude what could have been the problem.

Like someone mention, it could be financial issues, honestly 70% of men are affected by their financial status, while women are more emotional, most men are logical.
What is there to be enjoying when there are a lot of uncertainties.

On the other hand, it could be that some men are just promiscuous in nature and are fed up with the regular which is already boring.

Anyway just pray to marry someone who is a friend and is ready to share everything with you