₦airaland Forum

Cimar:
No real love in marriage,

85-90% of marriage..

Ishilove:
Dey play. Yet every Saturday our roads are blocked because of wedding receptions. It is only on social media that marriages are going out of fashion.

Some of you come from very dysfunctional homes and have developed a very skewed perception about the divine institution of marriage. Wouldn't blame ya because we are usually the product of our upbringing.

No one is against the institution of marriage. I'm just enlightening men about the nature of women.
What I'm against is th dysfunctional narrative that polygamy is bad. This narrative is what women want us to believe.

There are 4 major forms of marriage.
-Monogamy
-Polygamy
-Polyandry
-Polygamy.

Of all these forms of marriage, women only wish to practice monogamy because it guarantees their survival whereas men would opt for Polygamy because that's where they may find solace in this concept of marriage.

Ishilove, you are not my target audience. Just read and swipe.
This is the MALE AWAKENING.
SHALOM

Manson1:
4) Your in-laws are not your friends. Relate with them with caution.

True talk..
Your In-laws are not your friend....... hmmmmm!
Never knew it was a saying, just playing around with the thought in my head.
No matter how good or nice you tend to be, it always end-up terrible expecially towards any of the in-laws living with you guys.

AlphaHakimi:
Marriage is the most critically crafted institution that is designed to control the behaviour of humans and ensure the controlled existence of mankind.

Please note that I used the word "control" in order to truly explain the nature of marriage. This is because, there is nothing you can achieve within Marriage that cannot be achieved outside of marriage for men.
Just name one thing you can achieve within the confines of marriage that you cannot achieve outside marriage.

Animals don't get married but yet they sustain the existence of their species.

Every factor that made you as a man go into marriage will become irrelevant after one year of marriage.

Now if you are saddled with this fact as a man, why don't you make marriage transactional just as women do?.

Don't settle for less. You're a MAN for goodness sake. Don't date or marry any girl who is poor or from a poor background. Any day the marriage stops serving your purpose please LEAVE because your wife will leave you any day you stop serving her purpose. Your children no matter their age will understand once they get older.

This is why women love marriage.
1) If she gets married at 25 years of age, she is sure that all things being equal, you as a man will provide for her until she gets to 55years of age. By that time, she must have had an adult who will continue where you stop.

2) By 55years of age, your children will begin to think that their mother was the ONLY parent that suffered to raise them. They forget all the hardwork, insults and humiliation you had to endure to provide.

3) She secures a guardian, protector, companion, sexual exclusivity etc all to your own detriment.

Finally, don't be decieved about marriage as a man. It is a money-milking institution designed to ensure women survive this harsh world. DONT LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR THE SURVIVAL OF WOMEN, LIVE FREE AND LIVE WELL.

Shalom

Religiously, your post no tally but interms of nature and humanity, this is 100% correct.
Women are selfish and greedy. They will make use of you for their own survival and their siblings survival including their parents.
Men need to wake-up and never settle for less.

AlphaHakimi:
I am speaking to you as an individual. If your dad was/is a good man, you will still love him whether he is married to your mum or not.

Every woman's gift is conditional and sentimental. Here is an analogy of a sentimental gift from women(Your mum)

" You return home from school and ask your father for 10,000 to buy a text book at school. He will ask you what textbook you want to buy and you may have probably inflated the amount for the textbook. At night, your father stays awake thinking of how he will give you his last 10k for school. Tomorrow morning he calls you and gives you 7k. He give 2k to your mum for food before going to work and he is left with Just 1k. Now he has to pay transport or fuel his car, he has to also buy something to eat from that same 1k.
Now you go back to your room feeling sad that your dad did not give you the complete money. While you are grumbling, your mum squeezes 3k into your hand and tells you 'don't mind your father, he is a stingy man' and immediately you collect the money from her, you feel better and begin to smile and your emotions surpasses your reasoning. You are angry at someone (your dad) who gave you 7k but you are happy with someone who gave you 3k". WOMEN ATTACH SENTIMENTS TO THEIR GIFTS.

Do not misinterpret my message for being misogynistic. I'm just trying to open your mind to properly understand the world and how women think.

Shalom

Even if you're called misogynist or narcissistic, don't worry. Some of us were regarded worse because we chose to identify with reality. Women? Our mothers! Damn!!. May Lord have mercy.

OloYeOfEgbE:
Hmmm....

If you ain't ready for the downs and if you tend to forget its about the kids,biko remain single,enjoy your life and date as many people as you want during Ups till ya die. God no go vex.

Choice

That's the mistake most people make (women included). It's not entirely about the kids. You matter and your happiness matters too.

Zyxsc:
1. For a man, it's just a bills-paying institution. You go pay bills sotey you go forget wetin carry you enter the marriage in the first place

2. Enjoy your bachelorhood Wella before going into it. 40 is not too late for a man to get married.

3. You can't prove you're mentally strong until you're married because na then you go know what it takes to retrain an adult child like your wife. She go do some kain things wey be say, e fit make you go crazy.

4. If you can avoid it, please do. It's not worth it. Once you're married, you'll loose a part of your freedom. You can only regain it at the detriment of your home.

5. Don't go into marriage because of children. They may grow up and not make you happy by going against your wish (of course, they have their own lives to live. You've lived yours). Don't go into marriage because you love your girlfriend. Na this one go clear your eyes pass. Go into marriage because you want a life-long friend. Even at that, it's still a gamble. E fit shock you 10 years down the line.

Fûcking genius. Can you please increase the volume? All these boys need I hear this.

AlphaHakimi:
Pocahontas seems genuinely nice. That does not mean that she will/cannot manipulate anyone in her life.

odiegwu dem no dey see blood for witch mouth

The beginning of high blood pressure.

EriMma1:
That's what I'm saying now. Responsibly caged

nah.

If that's it then you are caged in your working place because you owe them an obligation.

There's a price for everything. Responsibility is paying that price

AlphaHakimi:
My brother,

The reason why I always say that this present day marriage does not favour men is because of VALUE.
Now you may want to know what I mean by value. Value is the worth attached to something. Men do not marry a woman because she can provide. Men do not marry because a woman can protect. Men marry unconditionally. This is why men love unconditionally. This love is akin to the kind of Love Jesus has for us. It is an unconditional love. This is why a man can marry a poor, illiterate, village girl and bring her to the city and change her life and the life of her family forever without asking for anything in return.

On the other hand, women marry on the condition that you provide something. You provide, protect, lead etc. If you're unable to do these things, they will say "he is not yet matured for marriage"

Now as a man, as you age, your value as a marriage able man increases. On the other hand, as a woman ages, her value as a marriage able woman decreases.
This is why women hate polygamy. They know that when you are ready to practice polygamy, they will no longer be among those you will truly want. This is why they are against polygamy. People may argue that women can also decide to practice polyandry but it will not favour them because once they clock 50yrs their husband's will look for someone younger.

[b][/b]The only natural requirement for a man to get married according to nature is if he can impregnate a women. Women are the once attaching other things like provision, protection etc.

So ask yourself this question, why would you stick with one woman when your value increases. Why stay in such bondage. When women had the womanly value, they had several partners and that was when they think the whole world revolves around them. But when it's your turn to have the whole world around your finger tip, women would now want you to be monogamous.

The purest form of unconditional love you can ever get from a woman is that of your Mother. She is the only woman that can love you unconditionally and that is the kind of live men seek from their wives.

Do not come here to tell me I have sisters or a mother. I JUST WANT TO REMIND YOU THAT YOUR MOTHER IS YOUR FATHERS WIFE AND HENCE SHE WILL MANIPULATE HIM BUT SHE WILL LOVE YOU. YOUR SISTERS WILL MANIPULATE THEIR HUSBANDS BUT THEY WILL LOVE YOU.


SO THE TYPE OF MANIPULATION YOU WILL GET FROM WOMEN DEPENDS 100% ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM.

Requirement na to Bleep

AlphaHakimi:
No one is against the institution of marriage. I'm just enlightening men about the nature of women.
What I'm against is th dysfunctional narrative that polygamy is bad. This narrative is what women want us to believe.

There are 4 major forms of marriage.
-Monogamy
-Polygamy
-Polyandry
-Polygamy.

Of all these forms of marriage, women only wish to practice monogamy because it guarantees their survival whereas men would opt for Polygamy because that's where they may find solace in this concept of marriage.

Ishilove, you are not my target audience. Just read and swipe.
This is the MALE AWAKENING.
SHALOM

You do NOT know the nature of women. You do not know how we think. You do not know what drives our choices. You do not know our world view. You know absolutely NOTHING about women. If you did, you wouldn't be capping this hogwash. You're like all these transgender women who are claiming to be more feminine than biological women. If you are not a woman, you can NEVER know what it is like to be a woman.

I don't care what you think you know about the womenfolk, but what I know with 💯 certainty is that whatever it is, it is absolute, undiluted CRAP.

Shalom 🖖

PECON1:
Are u serious,am afraid. If not for children,I hate marriage,am very serious. I don't see the reason why I will overwork myself to feed an Adult and at the end die. The Adult will start sleeping around or even poison me if she choose to or cheat on me😣

Haa! See as I open mouth like Ijebu man

Opurumiri:
Oga this talk has no meaning. Life is not written on a slate. If I decide to marry at 50 is non of your business. What matters is what makes you happy and give you joy. I prefer having my kids with me in my 60s and being very comfortable after making money. Than to be 60 all my kids have left me to pursue their lives I then start calling them on phone for 10k every month. How are you sure all your kids will take care of you? We Blacks should stop this mentality of my kids will take care of me when I grow old? Never ever hope on your kids even if you're 60 and they are 40 because they have there lives to live. Plan your life now!!! Make enough money for your retirement then marry and have a kid or two!

This is ideal but it's not feasible in Nigeria only when you live abroad or you are really lucky to make that kind of money and also secure it in Nigeria. How many of Nigerian men will make that kind money? Does that mean we shouldn't marry note..I'm not saying people should bear children without plans and breed poverty but man realistically its hard. Me sef no de Naija yet I dey feel am so reason am

b3llo:
Se.x will become a duty instead of the fun you enjoy as single.

I can relate

Reading

franchasofficia:
THE BIGGEST LESSON EVERY SINGLE PERSON SHOULD LEARN BEFORE GETTING MARRIED IS:


Financial stability is the biggest challenge in marriage, followed by sexual matters.


Before you get married, try and fix your financial life as a man especially. Don't marry hoping on "marriage will bring luck" because if it was so, we won't have millions of very poor married men and women in Nigeria today. Why didn't their own marriage bring them luck that made them rich or sufficient?


Marry with sense. If you are broke or struggling financially as a single man, don't go and marry a broke, jobless, struggling lady in the name of love or whatever, you are just pushing yourself and future kids into generational poverty. Marry a help mate, a lady that will help you succeed financially and otherwise. Don't marry a lady that will complicate your financial issues. Based on this reason, as a broke or financially struggling single man, forget about marrying girls below 27yrs of age in Nigeria because most girls below 27yrs are broke, financial baggage and mostly expect men to spend on them. Nigerian ladies start to have sense and become asset to their male partners from 30yrs and above, so if you are a broke guy in Nigeria, please avoid ladies below 30 and go for mature ladies who have realised that life is not a fantasy but are rather looking for a man to build a home with.




If you live in Nigeria as a single man, don't marry depending on a paid private company job which can be lost at any time, get extra skill or handwork or side business if possible and always expect the worst news from your employer and be prepared to hustle should you lose your job. To this effect, don't marry a jobless lady, and if you must marry her, have a solid plan and agreement for her to start up a business or learn a profitable trade or enrol in school to study a currently trending course to help you guys maneuver the future financial loads coming to you as married couple.




THE GREATEST BATTLE IN TODAY'S MARRIAGE IS MONEY, MONEY MONEY MONEY! MAKE SURE YOU HAVE STABILIZED YOUR INCOME AND READY TO PAY BILLS UPON BILLS BEFORE YOU MARRY. AND MARRY A LADY THAT WILL HELP YOU FINANCIALLY NOT JUST A LADY THAT EXPECT YOU TO BRING BRING ALL THE TIME, UNLESS YOU ARE VERY FINANCIALLY BUOYANT, THEN YOU CAN MARRY ANY LADY, RICH OR POOR!

This has actually made my day...I FEEL SO HAPPY!

Thanks bruh

haybee2018:
This has actually made my day...I FEEL SO HAPPY!

Thanks bruh

You are highly welcome chief

Bills upon bills, responsibilities..Not worth d hype anyway!

phemmyfour:
As a man , if you married the first born of a struggling family .....be ready to acquire bills from her siblings and parents even before having your own kids.

100% TRUE

simplesearch:
Very useless advice none should listen to or accept. In life You always get your complementary half, meaning you can't be deceitful, promiscuous, cunning, and expect to get the opposite by chance if such does exist. There are women who will choose never to get marry again after the death of their husband. There are also many who serves as breadwinner for their homes when the going became tough for the man without blowing a trumpet. If you get marry to an ex-hooker, bisexual, serial fornicator or even a leabian or a godless fellow and except to have a good and sincere partner; you're joikng .

At the bolded you better remain single, believing that getting married to straight person will end you good marriage you are joking too.

Prenonjebose:
Hearing the these words "what have you ever done for me" even when you carry out 90% of the responsibilities.

O boy I don hear that one tire... Have u been told am just managing u.. Thank God for the kids

My advice, God gave me in my dream when praying for a wife in my dream

1. Follow the woman in your dream world ,( I saw my wedding , even saw my dad, but the devil is trying to blindfold me not to see the truth)
2. Stay with her for one year without sex, and you will see her true nature , if you sleep with her, you will get blinded by your desires and your judgement will be clouded.

After reading all the coments, arguments, advice and experiences shared here, i have decided to withdraw my down bride price payment... to my in-laws to be in IMO State
Pls who is accompanying me for the retrieval?

Zyxsc:
That's the mistake most people make (women included). It's not entirely about the kids. You matter and your happiness matters too.

You if you didn't matter and your parents were all about themselves.. you won't be here typing..

Rest

Microwhy:
True talk..
Your In-laws are not your friend....... hmmmmm!
Never knew it was a saying, just playing around with the thought in my head.
No matter how good or nice you tend to be, it always end-up terrible expecially towards any of the in-laws living with you guys.

Marrying the only son doesn't guarantee enjoyment

Hassanmaye:
Please you guys should stop scaring us

Not really. Marriage has its good side (in no little way)

But believe me, its not for the faint hearted.

A fight can start immediately after a good sex!

The wedding day is a 100 metre dash whilst the marriage proper is a marathon.

You can have a child out of wedlock and getting a woman pregnant is no reason to rush into marriage if you are not yet ready for marriage.

You don't really need to live with a woman to be happy and conversely, living with a woman more often than not leads to unhappiness LONG TERM.

There is a reason Don Jazzy is not married, why Babangida did not remarry and neither did Aliko Dangote who has tried marriage 3 times and it did not work out for him and he is happily single now despite being the richest man in Africa.

Zyxsc:
1. For a man, it's just a bills-paying institution. You go pay bills sotey you go forget wetin carry you enter the marriage in the first place

2. Enjoy your bachelorhood Wella before going into it. 40 is not too late for a man to get married.

3. You can't prove you're mentally strong until you're married because na then you go know what it takes to retrain an adult child like your wife. She go do some kain things wey be say, e fit make you go crazy.

4. If you can avoid it, please do. It's not worth it. Once you're married, you'll loose a part of your freedom. You can only regain it at the detriment of your home.

5. Don't go into marriage because of children. They may grow up and not make you happy by going against your wish (of course, they have their own lives to live. You've lived yours). Don't go into marriage because you love your girlfriend. Na this one go clear your eyes pass. Go into marriage because you want a life-long friend. Even at that, it's still a gamble. E fit shock you 10 years down the line.

True talk.

Women generally don't like being corrected and if they see that you are winning an argument based on superior logic, dem go turn am to roforofo fight.

Cimar:
No real love in marriage,

Love dies after 2 kids to be replaced by neglect and see finish.