I think my Dad had bipolar disorder.
This minute, he can be sweet as to buying you nice stuffs and the next minute he's extremely mad to the extent of smashing or burning that same thing in your very before.
My Dad has smashed tv, expensive phone etc he bought for me and burnt my combat pants because he felt it had too many pockets and was meant for rogues.
I am not anything like him.
I don't even get angry.
I snub.

fergie001:
Just too quiet for my liking.

Being quiet has it's own advantage.

Some extroverted dads have put their family in danger by revealing more than they should in some way or another

Also remember that gentility is not stupidity.

Didn't show that he cared about us his children. We suffered. Had children here and there.

No footprint in our lives save his DNA.

My father is a good man but tends to put all his eggs in one basket. That's how he missed many opportunities.

Thankfully, I'm not like that. I'm versatile

I think there should be a general shift in our ways of parenting, shouting and beating your wards is not getting the desired results, if not the youths won't be in such a deplorable state.

Any small thing a kid does, the parent beats him like thief caught by vigilantes, I think we should study our kids more, sometimes there might be a reason they behave in a way you termed " nasty" as a parent, then subsequently you can find a way to teach him and reprimand him....not everything is beating.

A neighbor of mine beat his son some years ago for rolling on the ground, he was devastated because all his new clothes were dirty, after some hours I called the kid and asked him why he was rolling on the ground ,his answer shocked me, he was fixing his toy, a hand made " motor " made from empty tin of milk, he wanted to put a brake but has been unsuccessful for hours , when he eventually got it, he was so elated and started rolling on the floor, I called his father and narrated the story to him, he was visibly disappointed in himself for not making further enquiry before beating " future scientist".......no be everything be beating.

sacajawea:

You are a Mad fellow...
You are not sane

Firstly, you are the one that is insane here, you don't understand, am not saying that he should be arrogant either but too much of everything is bad..it can bring disrespect!

realestate99:
I think there should be a general shift in our ways of parenting, shouting and beating your wards is not getting the desired results, if not the youths won't be in such a deplorable state.

Any small thing a kid does, the parent beats him like thief caught by vigilantes, I think we should study our kids more, sometimes there might be a reason they behave in a way you termed " nasty" as a parent, then subsequently you can find a way to teach him and reprimand him....not everything is beating.

A neighbor of mine beat his son some years ago for rolling on the ground, he was devastated because all his new clothes were dirty, after some hours I called the kid and asked him why he was rolling on the ground ,his answer shocked me, he was fixing his toy, a hand made " motor " made from empty tin of milk, he wanted to put a brake but has been unsuccessful for hours , when he eventually got it, he was so elated and started rolling on the floor, I called his father and narrated the story to him, he was visibly disappointed in himself for not making further enquiry before beating " future scientist".......no be everything be beating.

You are right.

Sometimes, we lose control of ourselves as a parent in the guise of child discipline.kids are human beings and not animals and respond well to love.

When my mother-in-law was living with us, she was always clashing with my son and each time, i noticed her aggresive ways of trying to correct the child.

Always yelling over the most simple things which never went down well with me. She thought the boy was stubborn which was not the case. Her pareting style was old school and the born was born abroad.

his nonchalant attitudes is not something worthy of emulation


he takes things that would have help him with levity hands


he see kids as investment even when there is no excellence investment on them


I take every opportunity around me serious


I don't joke with every opportunity that will make me buy silver spoon for my kids, not illegal things


I don't see kids as investment, kids to me are more of history than investment. so I'm going to invest heavily on physical and human capital with a balance ratio, I need not to wait for any kids while I'm growing old before I can feed

Deeprooted:
Polygamy.

I'm not doing that sh!t.
It tears family apart and the father end up not being loved much coz everyone sees him as "general father".

I loved my dad nonetheless!

Nigerian men that desire polygamy, are you listening

no one from a polygamous home has anything good to say, and will hardly replicate it in own homes.

Great man all around but can be arrogant

Klass99:


This sounds like my dad and almost every Nigerian man I know. Sadly you may marry, have kids and still make the same mistake your father and mine did.

Because you men don't ever listen to your wives when they try to caution or shield you from the pack of wolves you call your relatives. You wrongly assume your wives are selfish or hateful and they don't want you to help your families. That's usually not the case.

Women see how your own blood relatives are often entitled, lazy, covetous or envious and they want to take advantage of you all. However majority of you are unable to see what your relatives are really like and una go carry blood is thicker than water on your heads like gala. Until blood shows you shege then your wife's words of caution start to make sense.

I smile and shake my head when ignorant men say things like a wife is not your blood or relative. Your own blood relatives will wound you quicker and faster than the wife who is not related to you. Most of us grew up seeing this happen in our parents homes but we become adults and think it can't happen to us, after all blood is thicker than water na.

Pele dear calm down and breathe

My dad prefers to take advice from outsiders rather than his wife or children and most times the advice dey always Fvck up.
But me dey always take advice steady steady from my brother, even down to fashion🤣😂😂.

Klass99:


This sounds like my dad and almost every Nigerian man I know. Sadly you may marry, have kids and still make the same mistake your father and mine did.

Because you men don't ever listen to your wives when they try to caution or shield you from the pack of wolves you call your relatives. You wrongly assume your wives are selfish or hateful and they don't want you to help your families. That's usually not the case.

Women can see how your blood relatives are often entitled, lazy, covetous or envious and they want to take advantage of you. However majority of you are unable to see what your relatives are really like and you carry blood is thicker than water on your heads like gala. Until blood shows you shege then your wife's words of caution start to make sense.

I smile and shake my head when ignorant men say things like a wife is not your blood or relative. Your own blood relatives will wound you quicker and faster than the wife who is not related to you. Most of us grew up seeing this happen in our parents' homes but we become adults and think it can't happen to us, after all blood is thicker than water na.

Oh....and genuine condolences for the loss of your father, that must have been really rough. I spoke with mine today and I can't wait to go see him. None of us is promised tomorrow.

Saying your wife isn't your family is very misogynistic.

When you marry you become one with your spouse, like a team. Even their bible says that.

The family you're about to create takes priority over the one you left behind. The man's parents will die, his siblings will marry and face their own lives. It's you and your wife up till the end.

Alot of Nigerian men see as it as control when they're corrected by their wives

My own father was drunkard, it dealt with him till he died 2 years ago... I hate alcoholic with passion... If not my Dad would have been the best in the world... Alcohol and cigarettes are my dangerous enemy

Britishcoins:
My own father was drunkard, it dealt with him till he died 2 years ago... I hate alcoholic with passion... If not my Dad would have been the best in the world... Alcohol and cigarettes are my dangerous enemy

I am sorry to hear that. Alchohol abuse by fathers can have a disastrous effect on the family.

My dad believe his family and trust them too much to the detriment of his own family. My dad comes from a polygamous home and he takes his step siblings side and believe/ trust them even when God thru spiritual intervention reviews that his problems and that which his children are facing originates from his father's House.
Another thing I hate about him is him taking his family matters outside. He discusses his children and wife at his place of work, to his family and even in church to anyone who he is familiar with.
Thirdly he always compares his children to other kids and complain how they are doing great. If he see someone kid being a footballer he will say we should have play ball, if they are playing musical instruments he says we should have done that too. Always seeing good in others and wanting same. But he has never ever in his life since he know him take any of his children to football or music practices for once or ever encourage us or lead us to do one thing or another.
Never ever came to my school from nursery to university.i remember when I got admission to the university, and was asked to paid some money he said I should stay back and forget about it. My dad has never sat with me or my siblings to teach us for once. Was a good driver and have a car which he never thought me or my siblings to drive.
His entire mindset, lifestyle and behavior is something i detest and don't ever in this life want to emulate. And I dont want my kids to bear his name or surname, cos to me he was a failure.
I want similar topic too about mother too like this

1Sharon:


Saying your wife isn't your family is very misogynistic.

When you marry you become one with your spouse, like a team. Even their bible says that.

The family you're about to create takes priority over the one you left behind. The man's parents will die, his siblings will marry and face their own lives. It's you and your wife up till the end.

Alot of Nigerian men see as it as control when they're corrected by their wives

My wife is the mother of my children and the closest family i have on earth.
I am open to being corrected by my child talkless of my wife.

After my marriage, I told everyone in my family they would have proplem with my if anyone disrespects my wife.

After marriage, your parents and siblings become extended family

Nairas2dollars:
Firstly, you are the one that is insane here, you don't understand, am not saying that he should be arrogant either but too much of everything is bad..it can bring disrespect!

GO back and read what you wrote... or better yet, come back to it in a couple of months.

You are crazy and irritating. Mad, mad, mad.

Emu4life:
Tells people his plans of Months or even years. This, I will never do. I will keep doing my things without informing anyone, the end result should speak for itself.

Are you talking about my father 😁🤣

Nonexisting1:
My father is a simp and too nice to vaginarians. He is also very extravagant with money. Recently, the old man has been admiring me. I am the exact person he had wanted to be but I guess it's too late for him now. My stinginess and my zero tolerance for vaginarians and their shenanigans are on another level. Cheers to all the gentlemen like me jare.

don't be too sure of yourself, wait for few more years and let your children type who you are. Then you will know who truly you have become. [color=#990000][/color]

He was too laidback for my liking considering the opportunities he/his generation had and I am getting scared I sometimes feel I am laidback too.

He is not interested in making money because money means nothing to him, for me money means nothing to me also but i just like making money simple

I like my dad the way he is. But sometimes, he can be annoying cuz he get angry easily. And very stingy too😭. He only does whatever he deem necessary. Whenever you need something important, he will first interrogate the hell out of you, before considering if it's important or not. And mostly no matter what you said, too him it is unnecessary.

So I tend too change that about me. Listening to your kids whenever they said they are in need of something important. And be cool headed . Not getting angry easily by the slightest things.

None. He is my role model. He made so much sacrifice for me and my siblings. He is smart, intelligent and very sociable. He commands respect wherever he goes. I think his huge size and body build also play a very big role in the fear/respect he instill on people around him. However he is not a troublemaker. He would never hurt a fly unless if the fly intends hurting his family. He is a family man. I don't know if I can really be like him but I'll always try.

SonofGod231:
I think my Dad had bipolar disorder.
This minute, he can be sweet as to buying you nice stuffs and the next minute he's extremely mad to the extent of smashing or burning that same thing in your very before.
My Dad has smashed tv, expensive phone etc he bought for me and burnt my combat pants because he felt it had too many pockets and was meant for rogues.
I am not anything like him.
I don't even get angry.
I snub.

I am glad for the better man you have become.

I do believe the ability to control yourself during conflicts and provocations are the hallmarks of an adult.

When you begin to destroy things, you have lost control.

I will only keep learning from him. My dad is a great man, my role model, everything about him is beautiful although he is dead, rest in peace dad.Ezigbo Mmadu

sacajawea:

GO back and read what you wrote... or better yet, come back to it in a couple of months.

You are crazy and irritating. Mad, mad, mad.

you are being poor and mad simultaneously !.

Karemarealty288:
1) My Father was too kind to a fault and always want to solve everybody's problems. 2) My mom hold my Dad's mumu button.......me I no come get at all.

Maybe your dad and mine were separated at birth he is late,but I will forever love him

His wives (including my mother)and everyone held his mumu button and took advantage of him at every turn. Never met a kinder,easy going man than him.

I have his attributes but I use it to my advantage. People take advantage of me and it agitates those around,but it never bothers me. Where we differ is in decision making and pretending that I forgive

tommy589:


Maybe your dad and mine were separated at birth he is late,but I will forever love him

His wives (including my mother)and everyone held his mumu button and took advantage of him at every turn. Never met a kinder,easy going man than him.

I have his attributes but I use it to my advantage. People take advantage of me and it agitates those around,but it never bothers me. Where we differ is in decision making and pretending that I forgive

I forgive but never forget and definitely never give a second chance to be taken adantage of.

My father framed me up for murder after this incident.
Would not wish the habit of destroying his own children's lives remain in him. My brothers are sisters lives were reasonably ruined by him and I thought it was their fault. Recent evidence shows he's at the center of it all.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwBbEzawrqI&pp=ygUOTW91a2EgRW1tYW51ZWw%3D

I dont have anything I want to change about mine, he is perfect the way he is. i pray God helps me to be the best, The focus is on my own character now..