₦airaland Forum

We've actually done our best and the way its going..we are left to our fate. I just wanted to share here to get an ideal opinion.

My younger bro has been a thorn in our flesh even before my dad died. My late dad kept complaining about him. Bad friends, taking drugs and living an immoral life. This continued and affected his academics and he dropped out from the university.

As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son. Early this year, he wanted to fight my mom and I was very angry and we had to lock him up in the police cell for some days. He came out and became calm. After a month, he went back to his old ways.

We warned off his friends to stay away from him. Right now..my mom is ashamed of him as parents have warned their kids to stay away from my brother.

He doesn't sleep in the house and we threatened to lock him up again and he said we can kill him that his life has no meaning.

I believe he's not with his right senses.

Need your candid opinions. I want to save him.

adaperry25:
We've actually done our best and the way its going..we are left to our fate. I just wanted to share here to get an ideal opinion.

My younger bro has been a thorn in our flesh even before my dad died. My late dad kept complaining about him. Bad friends, taking drugs and living an immoral life. This continued and affected his academics and he dropped out from the university.

As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son. Early this year, he wanted to fight my mom and I was very angry and we had to lock him up in the police cell for some days. He came out and became calm. After a month, he went back to his old ways.

We warned off his friends to stay away from him. Right now..my mom is ashamed of him as parents have warned their kids to stay away from my brother.

He doesn't sleep in the house and we threatened to lock him up again and he said we can kill him that his life has no meaning.

I believe he's not with his right senses.

Need your candid opinions. I want to save him.

Take him to a rehab.

🥴

Drugs is finishing the youth of these days.

sunnymighty:
Take him to a rehab.

anyone u can recommend

Take him to a rehab center and don't forget to keep praying for him.. He'll surely come around

Sope otilo!
It is finished.
Nothing can be done again to change him.
except the miracle of GOD intervane.
Nigeria prison worsen it's inmates.

Locking him up won't solve the problem anymore.his bad behaviours have beyond toturing,cus how would you locked a human up and he got relised, eventually,he dive into what got him into prison again. don't you think he seriously need prayer

As I speak to you my 2 Brothers are doing just the same thing your brother is doing. From taking drugs to stealing and selling my Father’s properties to dropping out from School. My mum is late and had BP because of them. I have done my best to change them but to no avail. I have decided to since leave them to their fate.

I intend to get a place for my dad where he can stay away from them. He is no longer enjoying his stay in the house he build because of them and I am tired of complain here and there. I pray they change for good.

2goodbobo:
As I speak to you my 2 Brothers are doing just the same thing your brother is doing. From taking drugs to stealing and selling my Father’s properties to dropping out from School. My mum is late and had BP because of them. I have done my best to change them but to no avail. I have decided to since leave them to their fate.

I intend to get a place for my dad where he can stay away from them. He is no longer enjoying his stay in the house he build because of them and I am tired of complain here and there. I pray they change for good.

same shoes o
I have done my best

First of all, what do you mean As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son.?
Who is his brother?
Who are you referring to?

By the way, you can't handle your brother.
You can pray and keep praying for him to change though.

adaperry25:
We've actually done our best and the way its going..we are left to our fate. I just wanted to share here to get an ideal opinion.
My younger bro has been a thorn in our flesh even before my dad died. My late dad kept complaining about him. Bad friends, taking drugs and living an immoral life. This continued and affected his academics and he dropped out from the university. As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son. Early this year, he wanted to fight my mom and I was very angry and we had to lock him up in the police cell for some days. He came out and became calm. After a month, he went back to his old ways.We warned off his friends to stay away from him. Right now..my mom is ashamed of him as parents have warned their kids to stay away from my brother.
He doesn't sleep in the house and we threatened to lock him up again and he said we can kill him that his life has no meaning. I believe he's not with his right senses. Need your candid opinions. I want to save him.

So long as he is 18 and determined to live according to his own way, my advice would be that you leave him be, let him carry his cross on his head until he gets tired of doing it all on his own. You cannot force someone who is determined to do things his way to do it instead of your way. And the worst thing you can do is enable him by giving him money and allowing him to stay in the house and rob everyone else of their peace of mind. He doesn't sleep in the house, good.

As a matter of fact, since he is so grown up and no longer willing to abide by the rules of the home, your mother should ask him to move out to his own place— of course, paid for with his own money too— where he can live by his own rules. Allow him breath and leave him to his fate.

2goodbobo:
As I speak to you my 2 Brothers are doing just the same thing your brother is doing. From taking drugs to stealing and selling my Father’s properties to dropping out from School. My mum is late and had BP because of them. I have done my best to change them but to no avail. I have decided to since leave them to their fate. I intend to get a place for my dad where he can stay away from them. He is no longer enjoying his stay in the house he build because of them and I am tired of complain here and there. I pray they change for good.

But why is your father still housing them when they obviously seek to chart their own path? Why doesn't your father instead kick them out so they can go find their independence on their own terms? Why do parents enable and feed what is an obvious nuisance?

AsomArchitectNG:
Take him to a rehab center and don't forget to keep praying for him.. He'll surely come around

Rehab only works for those who are willing and ready to end their addiction. That is why the decision to rehab is not to be made by any other than the one who is in need of help. Else, na revolving door that one go easily become.

How can you save him. Are you his personal lord and saviour? Allow him to perish.

Omo i think it’s kids with rich parents that can afford to be wayward cause your family can handle your excesses

But when you from a struggling family especially in this Nigeria and then you keep on acting wayward omo you are doing yourself ooo

FROGMAN101:
Omo i think it’s kids with rich parents that can afford to be wayward cause your family can handle your excesses. But when you from a struggling family especially in this Nigeria and then you keep on acting wayward omo you are doing yourself ooo

You no see all those druggies wey full all those poverty-stricken parts of even your community for where you live? Drug problems no know class abeg!

Kobojunkiee:
You no see all those druggies wey full all those poverty-stricken parts of even your community for where you live? Drug problems no know class abeg!

This red man or woman “wayward” doesn’t necessarily mean “drugs” calm the hell down

I was only saying the spoilt rich kids can afford to have that facked up life and their parents can mitigate the crisis with the money.

But kids from struggling family don’t even have that life line so it’s futile to be useless. All hands on deck to succeed.

FROGMAN101:
■ This red man or woman “wayward” doesn’t necessarily mean “drugs” calm the hell down I was only saying the spoilt rich kids can afford to have that facked up life and their parents can mitigate the crisis with the money. But kids from struggling family don’t even have that life line so it’s futile to be useless. All hands on deck to be useful. You quoting me about drugs and poverty stricken community. What are you smoking this evening?

Again, whether it be drugs or sheer stubbornness, these things know no class. Look in your neighborhood to see that even in the poverty-stricken areas, the same pattern is observed among even the youths there.

I would really want to thank God for my younger bro,dude never gave us any wahala all thru his stay with me.

Having a prodigal child is really killing,may God have mercy.

You can only save him if he wants to be saved. Does he want to be saved?

If he's old enough to be by himself, for the sake of your mom's health and to prevent him from influencing your other younger brother, send him out and pray for him/help him from afar.

mariahAngel:
First of all, what do you mean As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son.?
Who is his brother?
Who are you referring to?

By the way, you can't handle your brother.
You can pray and keep praying for him to change though.

...The "Younger brother" the OP meant is the immediate sibling that followed the person the OP is complaining about. Then, the person the OP is complaining about is the OP's sibling.

Chai, this kain English tautology sef.. @mariahangel, I hope you understand the above statement.

Try get him here


It's for his good


Within some months he'll turn to a new leave after being here

No, he is with his senses. It's just that he has chosen take a path he sees as right and appropriate. I don't think he is going to stop until he gets his hands burned and discovers the errors of his ways. Until then, keep talking to him.

Only Jesus can change him. I wish I would have an opportunity to just talk to Him about Jesus and make him experience the life-changing love of the son of God.

....casting our cares upon him because he cares for us

Get him a Job

adaperry25:
We've actually done our best and the way its going..we are left to our fate. I just wanted to share here to get an ideal opinion.

My younger bro has been a thorn in our flesh even before my dad died. My late dad kept complaining about him. Bad friends, taking drugs and living an immoral life. This continued and affected his academics and he dropped out from the university.

As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son. Early this year, he wanted to fight my mom and I was very angry and we had to lock him up in the police cell for some days. He came out and became calm. After a month, he went back to his old ways.

We warned off his friends to stay away from him. Right now..my mom is ashamed of him as parents have warned their kids to stay away from my brother.

He doesn't sleep in the house and we threatened to lock him up again and he said we can kill him that his life has no meaning.

I believe he's not with his right senses.

Need your candid opinions. I want to save him.

Pray tell, how old is he ? if he's in his early 20's there's still hope he'd change, and that change wouldn't come from you, rather it'd be a personal decision from him. If he's in his late 20's to early 30's and still have this unproductive mindset in this era and current economy, then, change would be difficult but not impossible.

Also, hope he's not a member of a cult, otherwise that's a one way ticket to the great beyond, this one he's already saying his life has no meaning, the next thing would be to go and belong if he's not, so his life could have meaning.

One of my neighbors kid back then was exactly like that, dude eventually towed the right path as he advanced in age and currently he's the corner stone of the family and he's presently doing great.

adaperry25:
We've actually done our best and the way its going..we are left to our fate. I just wanted to share here to get an ideal opinion.

My younger bro has been a thorn in our flesh even before my dad died. My late dad kept complaining about him. Bad friends, taking drugs and living an immoral life. This continued and affected his academics and he dropped out from the university.

As we speak, his younger brother is in his final year and yet my brother remains a prodigal son. Early this year, he wanted to fight my mom and I was very angry and we had to lock him up in the police cell for some days. He came out and became calm. After a month, he went back to his old ways.

We warned off his friends to stay away from him. Right now..my mom is ashamed of him as parents have warned their kids to stay away from my brother.

He doesn't sleep in the house and we threatened to lock him up again and he said we can kill him that his life has no meaning.

I believe he's not with his right senses.

Need your candid opinions. I want to save him.

First of all I will like you to know that you and 2goodbobo are not alone.
What you are going through is what thousands of families are facing as their children are deep into drug addiction.
The main reason he is behaving that way is because his drug addiction is getting to a serious level that it has made him start behaving erratic. The way he is going, the drugs is taking him to destruction and he doesn't mind taking anyone down that path of destruction.
However, I will advice you to force him to a good rehab. Rehabs are very expensive so try do a family meeting excluding him, raise funds to a certain level and let elderly members of the family insist he goes on a rehabilitation of at least 4 months. If the rehabilitation works, you will get your brother back. Else he will tow down the path of self-destruction that comes from drug addiction.
Praying you and your family can get the funds they need for a solution.



P/S: Please Ignore Kobojunkiee. She feels she has the ideal solution to all family problems but I am sure she's living an isolated single life. She will soon quote me to make some dull statement as usual.

[/quote][quote author=Kobojunkiee post=126041216]But why is your father still housing them when they obviously seek to chart their own path? Why doesn't your father instead kick them out so they can go find their independence on their own terms? Why do parents enable and feed what is an obvious nuisance?

Where else should they go? He practically built the house for his family. They are part of the family too.

[/quote][quote author=Kobojunkiee post=126041216]But why is your father still housing them when they obviously seek to chart their own path? Why doesn't your father instead kick them out so they can go find their independence on their own terms? Why do parents enable and feed what is an obvious nuisance?

Where else should they go? He practically built the house for his family. They are part of the family too.


This your opinion never holds any ground

Sticooooooo:
■ Where else should they go? He practically built the house for his family. They are part of the family too. This your opinion never holds any ground

A family is meant to be a cohesive unit, isn't it? When one decides to chart his own part, going as far as inconveniencing others with his behavior, it means he does not desire to remain a part of that cohesive unit. Why not cut him loose and let him go elsewhere to do as he pleases? The one person up there is even planning to move his family out of the house he built in order that his drug abusing brothers can continue living in the house all by themselves. Which kain family be that?

There is more to family than just blood relations. Or would you also claim family when the person's behavior directly threatens the lives of those in the home or outside?