chidiokay:



You can't just assume she is inconsiderate, there was a time i told my babe i was broke, infact i was broke for real, buh base on one or two gigs i was till able to maintain some lifestyle ...
when i called her nd challenge her why she couldnt offer help, i got to know she was watching me and she deduce these one wey still dey get drink for fridge, On gen down no need help

Women are not wired to give boyfriends money, exceptions to few

So she didn't help you kos you got drinks for fridge hmm let me just keep shut.

Well for me I can appreciate a genuine little kind gesture for as long as I can. I just think it's the right thing to do

Offpointng:


I've also seen my guy's girl pray and always support Micheal when he was low, infact the support she showed him those times, if I could duplicate her for myself I could have. But mine isn't fiancing at all

I feel if I ask, she'd start loosing respect for me reason why I feel she should have just done it for me without me asking

Does she allow her brother to ask before helping out? When you guys eventually get married, as a family, she expects you to ask before she contribute? She is stylishly been stingy in the name of you didn't ask.

EreluRoz:
So she didn't help you kos you got drinks for fridge hmm let me just keep shut.

Well for me I can appreciate a genuine little kind gesture for as long as I can. I just think it's the right thing to do

I don't see it as she doesnt want to help, according to her she wasnt just convinced, i don't blame her...

If you say you are Broke, people expect to see some changes, atleast your lifestyle should drop at that moment, but when they don't see that many will just hold back,

If you ask her for help directly and she still failed to help then it clear she is not the supportive type

She's stingy, selfish and doesn't love you. Love is sharing.She's stingy, selfish and doesn't love you. Love is sharing....

Offpointng:
Straight to the point, I'm someone who doesn't like to bore people out with my problems so whatever is happening to me I just keep to myself and find a respite or just die in it if I can't fine my way outta the problem

My fiancee appear nice but tbh I really can't tell cuz ion ask her for things. so I decided to play a quick test on her to understand her further; but the result further came out confusing. What was this test;

So I just thought to myself one day, paradventure (godforbid) life turn against me, will she be there for me?? I kinda lied to her I had IPPIS issue at work and I might not be paid for bout 3 month (wanted to see if she would support me thr that 3 month or not) and stuffs will be kinda hard for me. Tho she condole with me and was maybe sad for me idk but thr these 2 months now she has never for once told me take, I know things are not easy with you at the moment how can I assist or take this little amount. Does she work? Oh yes. How much does she earn? 85k roughly (does work remotely often and only report to work on Mondays alone) so yeah thinking of giving me 10k should not be an issue for her.

Tbh guys I was really heartbroken, I wished she passed the test cuz I really had good plans for her, cuz my trust for her would have been elevated and I was to surprise her with another phone cuz ion like the fact she uses Tecno (tho she isn't complaining sha) she doesn't really bill me to.

Now ion know if I should see her as a wife material or someone I can marry. So, I've come to ask if I'm really overreacting since I didn't really ask her to help me with money. Secondly, was that a wrong test to have done?? I'm confused.

As humans we’re not all wired the same way especially concerning women. But the fact that she’s aware you won’t be getting paid for three months she should’ve showed some form of concerns to how you’ve been getting by and handling financial issues.
This alone might not be enough reasons to break up but it’s damn enough to be on the list.
Be wise bro🫵🏽

Date your woman right,

Feminity is malleable

Offpointng:
Straight to the point, I'm someone who doesn't like to bore people out with my problems so whatever is happening to me I just keep to myself and find a respite or just die in it if I can't fine my way outta the problem

My fiancee appear nice but tbh I really can't tell cuz ion ask her for things. so I decided to play a quick test on her to understand her further; but the result further came out confusing. What was this test;

So I just thought to myself one day, paradventure (godforbid) life turn against me, will she be there for me?? I kinda lied to her I had IPPIS issue at work and I might not be paid for bout 3 month (wanted to see if she would support me thr that 3 month or not) and stuffs will be kinda hard for me. Tho she condole with me and was maybe sad for me idk but thr these 2 months now she has never for once told me take, I know things are not easy with you at the moment how can I assist or take this little amount. Does she work? Oh yes. How much does she earn? 85k roughly (does work remotely often and only report to work on Mondays alone) so yeah thinking of giving me 10k should not be an issue for her.

Tbh guys I was really heartbroken, I wished she passed the test cuz I really had good plans for her, cuz my trust for her would have been elevated and I was to surprise her with another phone cuz ion like the fact she uses Tecno (tho she isn't complaining sha) she doesn't really bill me to.

Now ion know if I should see her as a wife material or someone I can marry. So, I've come to ask if I'm really overreacting since I didn't really ask her to help me with money. Secondly, was that a wrong test to have done?? I'm confused.

Now you know Bro, treat a lady the way she does to you. Their heart can be numb

Red flag, stop taking this girls serious

NL ladies will be laughing at you. Man na donkey oOoOO

This Hausa proverb goes like this '' na Wawa àke ci, na mai wayo àke jari '' meaning '' a fools resources is for lavishing and a wise persons own is for investment ''

Use your head

Oga, demand for some cash from her. Someone like me will not give any money untill you requested for it

Tester.
She ll dump you once she finds out. Better start managing your heart now.
The audacity of some people.

If you don't address the issue critically now, my friend, he would come back to hunt you.

Man must marry a woman who is ready to loyal with him not because Money and other benefits comming from her man, she too must be ready to reciprocate the same gesture.


My then girlfriend, who is now my wife, voluntarily gave me all passwords she has, (ATM, phone, Facebook etc).
Meanwhile, that doesn't make me to abandon my responsibilities at home for her or turn me to hunter watching over her social media o

Offpointng:


This is exactly what's running on my mind atm

Men and women are wired differently except in some rare cases. Men are naturally givers, the other gender on the other hand believe her money is her money while his money is our money. Know this and know peace. You can only act differently if you ask or complain about a bill you want to settle and she turn deaf ears. Another POV is that women believe we men will always find ways of sorting ourselves no matter what. So do small lamentation about a bill you want to settle and see her reaction.

Omo Na so he be
Girls generally stingy

Odin13:
Ask first.. before you mark her test script..

People like me.. if you don’t ask.. mind fit no reach say you need am..

As long as she still loves you and cares as your woman..

We’re all wired differently

Whats the prove of the love and care if she can't ask how her fiance is coping with life after not being paid for 2 months.

Love is characterized by how much we're willing to give and sacrifice, and sadly, in this part of the world, we've taken the giving part to be only the man's responsibility.

Each day I hear women talk about how much they want intentional men lol. Here's an opportunity to be one but she's waiting to be told.

I found myself in a similar situation during covid-19 when they stopped paying me because we couldn't work. This girl I had been giving money never for once asked how I was coping. The girl is a nurse and was still working and getting paid during the heat of covid-19, but she never thought of send 500 naira airtime.

Many times I'd intentionally tell her I didn't have airtime to call just to see her reaction but nothing came out of it.

My submission is that the fiancee has shown signs of selfishness which is common amongst most ladies. "Jis money is our money, but my money is my money" mentality might be playing out here.

I'd personally not date anyone who wouldn't be excited about helping me when she's got the means. Both men and women deserve care and intentional partners.

What I'm reading on this thread is really awful.

God will help those of you that are involved o.

Offpointng:
Straight to the point, I'm someone who doesn't like to bore people out with my problems so whatever is happening to me I just keep to myself and find a respite or just die in it if I can't fine my way outta the problem

My fiancee appear nice but tbh I really can't tell cuz ion ask her for things. so I decided to play a quick test on her to understand her further; but the result further came out confusing. What was this test;

So I just thought to myself one day, paradventure (godforbid) life turn against me, will she be there for me?? I kinda lied to her I had IPPIS issue at work and I might not be paid for bout 3 month (wanted to see if she would support me thr that 3 month or not) and stuffs will be kinda hard for me. Tho she condole with me and was maybe sad for me idk but thr these 2 months now she has never for once told me take, I know things are not easy with you at the moment how can I assist or take this little amount. Does she work? Oh yes. How much does she earn? 85k roughly (does work remotely often and only report to work on Mondays alone) so yeah thinking of giving me 10k should not be an issue for her.

Tbh guys I was really heartbroken, I wished she passed the test cuz I really had good plans for her, cuz my trust for her would have been elevated and I was to surprise her with another phone cuz ion like the fact she uses Tecno (tho she isn't complaining sha) she doesn't really bill me to.

Now ion know if I should see her as a wife material or someone I can marry. So, I've come to ask if I'm really overreacting since I didn't really ask her to help me with money. Secondly, was that a wrong test to have done?? I'm confused.

The fact that she no de bill you, it's a good sign. She really might not be feeling you need money - she's thinking you have saved and it hasn't gotten to that extent for her to help you.


Now, what you should do is, ask her to lend you some money to fix something and they'll pay in 6 months time, and tell her your IPPIS issues won't be resolved until january of 2025 to see her reaction. Then you'd know who she truly is.

galantjoe:
Oga, demand for some cash from her. Someone like me will not give any money untill you requested for it

Then you’re not sensitive about other life

chidiokay:



You can't just assume she is inconsiderate, there was a time i told my babe i was broke, infact i was broke for real, buh base on one or two gigs i was till able to maintain some lifestyle ...
when i called her nd challenge her why she couldnt offer help, i got to know she was watching me and she deduce these one wey still dey get drink for fridge, On gen down no need help

Women are not wired to give boyfriends money, exceptions to few

The emboldened is like saying women are not wired to fart when they eat beans or women are not wired to to commit murder

descartes400:
[/b]

The emboldened is like saying women are not wired to fart when they eat beans or women are not wired to to commit murder

Oga your analogy no add up, what as murder got to do with "giving"
For these NL, people wey head dey pain plenty gan

Odin13:


As long as she still loves you and cares as your woman..

So what is love when the so called love u feel did not let it occur to you that your partner needs help in an actual time of help...

This is something women cannot take if the tables turn.....

Offpointng
Now u have seen one redflag....she's not a naturally thoughtful or kind person...u shouldn't have to ask her before she will look out for you your welfare.....

BALLOSKI:
The fact that she no de bill you, it's a good sign. She really might not be feeling you need money - she's thinking you have saved and it hasn't gotten to that extent for her to help you.


Now, what you should do is, ask her to lend you some money to fix something and they'll pay in 6 months time, and tell her your IPPIS issues won't be resolved until january of 2025 to see her reaction. Then you'd know who she truly is.

If it's the case of lending, She will lend me cuz she knows I'll pay back. lending wouldn't be a problem for her. just disappointed as to how she never thought for once to support me with anything.

Offpointng:


If it's the case of lending, She will lend me cuz she knows I'll pay back. lending wouldn't be a problem for her. just disappointed as to how she never thought for once to support me with anything.

Offpoint, please try and do what I suggested and see the outcome

LET ME HELP YOU BROTHER...
NATURALLY, LOVE, SACRIFICE AND GIVING ARE TOGETHER BY DEFAULT! ii.e YOU CANT SEPARATE THE THREE OF THEM!

Who taught you how to give her? The natural Love you have in your heart for her...
What taught her NOT to give to you? The lack/emptiness of love, concern or passion in her heart for you... NOTE: There are folks she's giving presently without those people asking her! Why? because she value them!

DON'T BE CONFUSED BY THE CONCEPT OF ASKING BEFORE GIVING... It does not correlate in all circumstance. This is someone who practically have not given you any gift before. Those are signs to detect who places value for you.

Don't be manipulated by you did not ask syndrome! I am not saying you should End the relationship, but she has failed the Test and you can't promote her to the next stage. Since relationship is about mentoring and training them, you can start training and mentoring her giving and caring life - If she improves, then promote the relationship to the next level, if she doesn't, then do what you wish.

Offpointng:
Straight to the point, I'm someone who doesn't like to bore people out with my problems so whatever is happening to me I just keep to myself and find a respite or just die in it if I can't fine my way outta the problem

My fiancee appear nice but tbh I really can't tell cuz ion ask her for things. so I decided to play a quick test on her to understand her further; but the result further came out confusing. What was this test;

So I just thought to myself one day, paradventure (godforbid) life turn against me, will she be there for me?? I kinda lied to her I had IPPIS issue at work and I might not be paid for bout 3 month (wanted to see if she would support me thr that 3 month or not) and stuffs will be kinda hard for me. Tho she condole with me and was maybe sad for me idk but thr these 2 months now she has never for once told me take, I know things are not easy with you at the moment how can I assist or take this little amount. Does she work? Oh yes. How much does she earn? 85k roughly (does work remotely often and only report to work on Mondays alone) so yeah thinking of giving me 10k should not be an issue for her.

Tbh guys I was really heartbroken, I wished she passed the test cuz I really had good plans for her, cuz my trust for her would have been elevated and I was to surprise her with another phone cuz ion like the fact she uses Tecno (tho she isn't complaining sha) she doesn't really bill me to.

Now ion know if I should see her as a wife material or someone I can marry. So, I've come to ask if I'm really overreacting since I didn't really ask her to help me with money. Secondly, was that a wrong test to have done?? I'm confused.

Naturally women are not givers,so why carry out the test even a blind man will know she has failed the test.

But OP why using ION? that is girlish

chidiokay:



Oga your analogy no add up, what as murder got to do with "giving"
For these NL, people wey head dey pain plenty gan

You erroneously and conclusively posited that women are not wired to render financial support to their partners...in other words women cannot offer financial support to their men if and when the said partner is in need,since they (women)are not capable of such an act, because they are not wired to

But of course you would rather throw tantrums.

descartes400:


You erroneously and conclusively posited that women are not wired to render financial support to their partners...in other words women cannot offer financial support to their men if and when the said partner is in need,since they (women)are not capable of such an act, because they are not wired to

But of course you would rather throw tantrums.

Posit ke! was it also me that me authored "Her money is her money but a Man money is our Money" .. even women don't argue these things

I clearly stated "Exceptions to Few" .. the biggest money i ever got from a friend came from a woman. i didnt even ask her she heard something nd called me

When i say women aint wired to give financial support to their boyfriend, i meant it is something they rarely do, that you rarely do something doesnt mean you can't do it or don't do it.
Simple reality

Offpointng:


If it's the case of lending, She will lend me cuz she knows I'll pay back. lending wouldn't be a problem for her. just disappointed as to how she never thought for once to support me with anything.

Stop feeling disappointed, it is mostly likely Your situation wasnt convincing enough ...

what if you don't appear like someone who needs "support", maybe if you complain about gifts you might generate a "Fuss"

OKOATA:
This your girl still try small, if na my ex na she go end am straight because I no get paid for 3 months. Men aren't meant to be loved, as long as say she no throw tantrums and she no show you sege make you manage am till you find someone better but I doubt cos all these Naija girls na case.

You have low self esteem

As a married man, it is better to have a wife who can carry the family when u are down, but love covereth all things.

Uptheante:

You have low self esteem

How I take get low self esteem, na because you never date most Naija girls much na why I no blame you. So make he leave him GF no be your advice be that? No be everything be just break up. If you like let him break up he might meet someone better or worse. It's a 50/50 thing.

STYCNig:
LET ME HELP YOU BROTHER...
NATURALLY, LOVE, SACRIFICE AND GIVING ARE TOGETHER BY DEFAULT! ii.e YOU CANT SEPARATE THE THREE OF THEM!

Who taught you how to give her? The natural Love you have in your heart for her...
What taught her NOT to give to you? The lack/emptiness of love, concern or passion in her heart for you... NOTE: There are folks she's giving presently without those people asking her! Why? because she value them!

DON'T BE CONFUSED BY THE CONCEPT OF ASKING BEFORE GIVING... It does not correlate in all circumstance. This is someone who practically have not given you any gift before. Those are signs to detect who places value for you.

Don't be manipulated by you did not ask syndrome! I am not saying you should End the relationship, but she has failed the Test and you can't promote her to the next stage. Since relationship is about mentoring and training them, you can start training and mentoring her giving and caring life - If she improves, then promote the relationship to the next level, if she doesn't, then do what you wish.

Don't always assume and conclude text with this your analogy.

Background is the first thing we check when issues like this arise.

Is that her first bf?

Was she jilted before coming into this relationship or what really happened?

Probably, she assisted with all he got with her ex and lost all. Here, she wants to be careful not be a victim again.

See, coming to a conclusion on text is not worth it at all. Ask questions. There you will find answers.

Op is testing her right? It's good but at the same, as he considered why she's not doing such hence, the need to ask.

Let him ask, she will bulge her mind and OP will realize why she's not doing what he wants. We are and can never be the same because we are wired differently with different life experiences.

Don't be judgemental if you don't ask questions to understand what the other party is going through.