₦airaland Forum

How can one be married to one but deeply in love with another?
What's your advice to a man/woman in this situation?
Is this the only exception to adultery or what?
That you're married, but all your entire being long for the other

You are married for marriage sake

Why would you be in love with another when you are married. You have already committed adultery and have betrayed your spouse.

In whatever you believe in your religion, you should love your spouse, but if spousal behaviour or character has not change affecting you loving your spouse.

Then think about it, if it is not working out you should do either of these 3 things tolerate,or separate or divorce for peace. Also remember the rule of divorce, it is not always rosy.

Do not allow the human nature/flesh to ruin your life.

Things like this happens alot.some memories are unforgettable.

Solofresh2:
You are married for marriage sake

Not true

Gracedavid4156:
Why would you be in love with another when you are married. You have already committed adultery and have betrayed your spouse.

In whatever you believe in your religion, you should love your spouse, but if spousal behaviour or character has not change affecting you loving your spouse.

Then think about it, if it is not working out you should do either of these 3 things tolerate,or separate or divorce for peace. Also remember the rule of divorce, it is not always rosy.

Do not allow the human nature/flesh to ruin your life.

Nobody is taking about separation or divorce.
You just find yourself loving someone so deeply

Xpeerence:
Things like this happens alot.some memories are unforgettable.

Exactly

It's either the person is in Lust or total Lost. People mistaken lusting as loving.

Dainy1:
How can one be married to one but deeply in love with another?
What's your advice to a man/woman in this situation? Is this the only exception to adultery or what? That you're married, but all your entire being long for the other

Simply divorce the one you don't love and marry the one you do. Adultery is instead a coward's way out of such a situation.

Dainy1:
Nobody is taking about separation or divorce. You just find yourself loving someone so deeply

You are better off talking about separation and divorce than of adultery though. Why not see this?

Xpeerence:
Things like this happens alot.some memories are unforgettable.

That is why Marriage Laws provide for divorce in even these cases. Adultery should be unacceptable but in cultures like Nigeria, it has been made more acceptable than divorce.

May we not be which such type of spouse

Kobojunkie:
You are better off talking about separation and divorce than of adultery though. Why not see this?

You think divorce is easy on the children?

anibirelawal:
It's either the person is in Lust or total Lost. People mistaken lusting as loving.

You mean there's no true love outside your marriage?

Dainy1:
You think divorce is easy on the children?

Is it easier on the children to hear their father or mother is busy dicking/fking another man or woman while married to the other parent?

Stop using the children as an excuse for what is instead cowardice.

anibirelawal:
It's either the person is in Lust or total Lost. People mistaken lusting as loving.

Pray tell, what is the difference?

Dainy1:
How can one be married to one but deeply in love with another?
What's your advice to a man/woman in this situation?
Is this the only exception to adultery or what?
That you're married, but all your entire being long for the other

You can still eat your cake and have it back. How? Ask Ned Nwoko, Yul Edochie, Paul of Psquare, Bola Tinubu, Gov Adeleke, Davido, Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, etc

Well it happens if it wasn't base on love you married your spouse in the first place. And probably compatibility is an issue too. In some tribe and religion, if the man has money he can just marry the one he's in love with as second wife. That doesn't mean he will be partial in treating the two wives. He will treat them equally.

Dainy1:
You mean there's no true love outside your marriage?

There are no excuses for failure, so If you fnd yourself in love with someone else outside your marriage. That simply means lack of contentment.

You can love anyone, but the intention of your affection is what matters most.

The love feelings you have for your children, siblings, parents can differ from that of your partner.

Kobojunkie:
Pray tell, what is the difference?

You mean difference between lust and love?
Let me put it in a simpler term. Love is a positive feelings and affection while lust is negative feelings.

anibirelawal:
■ You mean difference between lust and love?
Let me put it in a simpler term. Love is a positive feelings and affection while lust is negative feelings.

Ambiguous much?
Again, what is the difference between the two, and this time please offer up something more concrete.

Kobojunkie:
Ambiguous much?
Again, what is the difference between the two, and this time please offer up something more concrete.

Lust is strictly based on sexual attraction, whereas Love is based on emotional desire.

If you have any feelings towards another woman other than your wife, that cannot be love. You ought to consecrate yourself to God until that spirit leaves. And then, love your wife from your heart.

Dainy1:
How can one be married to one but deeply in love with another?
What's your advice to a man/woman in this situation?
Is this the only exception to adultery or what?
That you're married, but all your entire being long for the other

I would say that man needs a mental evaluation or is at best confused, mixing up lust with love. Now, I believe a counseling session is in order in this situation, and emotions like; love, lust, anger, envy, and jealousy, come and go and should not control a man and become a basis for decision-making. I can even argue experientially that love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship in the long run.

Now, what do you want for yourself and where is the confusion coming from? You have to make a rational choice as you cannot eat your cake and have it. Quit dicking around.

In lust you mean, give it time, you will still be in lust with another down the line.

100FIX1:
If you have any feelings towards another woman other than your wife, that cannot be love. You ought to consecrate yourself to God until that spirit leaves. And then, love your wife from your heart.

Could you people stop dragging the mention of God into conversations that He clearly said have nothing to do with Him? Try to make your point without dragging down in the mud in an attempt to justify your particular reasoning for Pete's sake!

anibirelawal:
■ Lust is strictly based on sexual attraction, whereas Love is based on emotional desire.

Huh?

Kobojunkie:
Huh?

How you see that wack definition of Lust and love?

Kobojunkie:
Huh?

Correct me if I'm wrong

Sapasenator:
How you see that wack definition of Lust and love?

Kindly define yours. We are here to learn not competing. If you have better narrative, elaborate it. Thanks.

anibirelawal:
■ Correct me if I'm wrong

It's just weird that your definition of love and lust are both linked to feelings(emotions) which even sexual feelings are of. I think love is meant instead as a set of rules between person A and person B that works best when formerly defined.

Here's a question for you. If your definition of love between a man and woman in marriage is not of the sexual kind as you claim, how come many men and women consider the absence of sexual compatibility an extreme deal breaker as far as marriage is concerned?

Why didn't you marry the person you love?