₦airaland Forum

My wife of 3 months pregnant has constantly being rejecting sex, we did our intro couple of months ago, I have being trying to safe up to complete the marital rites along the line she took in. The family expressed their sadness especially her mom, but the whole family now knows she's heavy. My job is a contract job and couple of months now I have been out of contract. The family to a point has been understanding , though we're both separated in different states but close to each other. Currently she visited and stayed 2 days she didn't even allowed me stay with her as partners this someone that we communicate often on phone telling how we missed each other. She visited and repelled all my advances towards her. I don't know what is going on the next day she left the house . Is it because of pregnancy that is making her behave like this. How could she repelled my advances after not seeing her for 2months now, when I asked her what's the problem for her rejection she was asking me if she's a intimacy gadget , this is someone i have not seen for 2months .

Why your DickThomas is still standing after you cannot pay common dowry is shocking.

Let your hands stand strong instead, to earn money to settle her family.

vanbonattel:
Why your DickThomas is still standing after you cannot pay common dowry is shocking.

Let your hands stand strong instead, to earn money to settle her family.

I didn't say I won't pay, it happened d way it happened and I told her to keep it. Afterall na marry we want marry . Paying the dowry and doing d marriage isn't the problem infact it's my topmost priority as soon as I get another contract. Make God help me cos is too early, I can't afford scandals in marriage. This is too early.

@Sultanofpuna, come and see what you have caused.

Zeal0000007:
I didn't say I won't pay, it happened d way it happened and I told her to keep it. Afterall na marry we want marry . Paying the dowry and doing d marriage isn't the problem infact it's my topmost priority as soon as I get another contract. Make God help me cos is too early, I can't afford scandals in marriage. This is too early.

Until then, learn how to endure konji, it's a sacrifice. Allow the poor girl bear the shame of carrying belle without a proper marriage in peace.

That lady fit go starve you sex for marriage o

Henryfocoyo:
That lady fit go starve you sex for marriage o

That's an unfair statement. The girl is reacting to the present situation where the OP has probably not kept his own side of the bargain.

Why didn’t you ask her? Why allow her return without finding out why she was acting that way? Why didn’t you let her know that she can’t return until she cheers up and is happy? Why didn’t you try to connect with her on an emotional level?

Anyways it’s not too late to ask her since you guys talk on phone. NLanders cannot answer all questions you know

By the way, I doubt if this story is true because 3 months pregnancy can never be termed as “heavy”. At that gestational age, the pregnancy doesn’t show. You people should stop trying to paint women “bad” abeg.

vanbonattel:
That's an unfair statement. The girl is reacting to the present situation where the OP has probably not kept his own side of the bargain.

No problems, until after full marital rites she still remains adamant.

PerfectStranger:
No problems, until after full marital rites she still remains adamant.

The OP never said she was refusing initially, this is as a result of present circumstances.

vanbonattel:
The OP never said she was refusing initially, this is as a result of present circumstances.

Are you in her mind to know its coz of present circumstances?

Zeal0000007
Are you sure that Pregnancy is 3Months or More?

I will encourage you check your time line with her and be sure that you're the real Father of that Baby.

Someone who really Love you cannot be doing like that and asking if she is... But sha I pray make your Hustle Pay so that you can Prepare adequately for the Baby's arrival but Abeg, check your Timeline with Her and do scan to calculate say you be the legit Father ooo.

Cos this wen una never enter Marriage wen she don dey Bulaba so ehn.

PerfectStranger:
Are you in her mind to know its coz of present circumstances?

Are you in her mind to know its NOT present circumstances?

theophorus:
Zeal0000007
Are you sure that Pregnancy is 3Months or More?

I will encourage you check your time line with her and be sure that you're the real Father of that Baby.

Someone who really Love you cannot be doing like that and asking if she is... But sha I pray make your Hustle Pay so that you can Prepare adequately for the Baby's arrival but Abeg, check your Timeline with Her and do scan to calculate say you be the legit Father ooo.

Cos this wen una never enter Marriage wen she don dey Bulaba so ehn.

Nice point.

🫤🫤🫤🫤

vanbonattel:
Until then, learn how to endure konji, it's a sacrifice. Allow the poor girl bear the shame of carrying belle without a proper marriage in peace.

Nor be penis she collect carry the belle?? She ddnt know she was not married before??

The guy is in for a bad ride....that's how she will be weaponizing sex after marriage... If u check well now... somebody else fit they enter the place....

Henryfocoyo:
That lady fit go starve you sex for marriage o

That's what will happen.... She's already doing it now.....

advanceDNA:
Nor be penis she collect carry the belle?? She ddnt know she was not married before??

The guy is in for a bad ride....that's how she will be weaponizing sex after marriage... If u check well now... somebody else fit they enter the place....

Yes she collect to get the belle, and she said she no dey collect again, end of story.

You are not seeing this with the real issue it is. The OP didn't plan well, he gave her the belle, and should take up the responsibility immediately. Romance na kick and follow football game, that gap he gave have started causing problems, and that's why I advised him not to prioritise knacking, but doing the needful to take her home permanently. If he has to borrow, or change work, or anything, don't leave your woman outside and still hope to retain your control.

vanbonattel:
Yes she collect to get the belle, and she said she no dey collect again, end of story.

You are not seeing this with the real issue it is.

There is no issue here other than the lady is weaponizing sex......if I were him I won't get married to such lady.....any lady that can stay without sex for months is going to problem in marriage.......

advanceDNA:
That's what will happen.... She's already doing it now.....

This is not right guys, the way we make a demon out our women is not good enough. This is a guy that picked a girl and got her pregnant. Am sure no decent girl will allow that if she is not expecting to be married off properly.

Now the story changed, work no dey again and it's not this girls direct fault. We don't know what she is going through with her family, and the priority of my guy is to knack her because she visited. Girls take too much rubbish from us o.

My guy should man up and get something doing, even if its enough to pay only the bride price, take her home and then take care of the new family, with her help of course.

advanceDNA:
There is no issue here other than the lady is weaponizing sex......if I were him I won't get married to such lady.....any lady that can stay without sex for months is going to problem in marriage.......

That's your conclusion, I can also conclude that the guy weaponized ma rriage. Why must he wait to get her pregnant before making attempt to marry her?

Haven't you heard of guys who married their fiancées without needing to get them pregnant?

vanbonattel:
This is not right guys,

Lol...this one wants to form authority on every opinion...who made u ploce of what's right or wrong...??

vanbonattel:
the way we make a demon out our women is not good enough.

demon....??
.because we are staying the obvious , we are demonizing .....welldone... captain save a skirt

vanbonattel:
This is a guy that picked a girl and got her pregnant.

oh I see...she was raped??
Why are u sounding like she's a victim?? What does that even mean, pick her and got her pregnant??

vanbonattel:
Am sure no decent girl will allow that if she is not expecting to be married off properly.

.. so accordimg.to u all the girls having sex before marriage are not decent....?? Look who's talking about demonizing women..

vanbonattel:
Now the story changed, work no dey again and it's not this girls direct fault. We don't know what she is going through with her family, and the priority of my guy is to knack her because she visited. Girls take too much rubbish from us o.

Guy u are just a a female asslîcker....does ur babe monitor ur comment on nairaland??

vanbonattel:
My guy should man up and get something doing, even if its enough to pay only the bride price, take her home and then take care of the new family, with her help of course.

The question u should always ask is what if a man loses his job inside the marriage?? Is this not the same thing that will happen??...women always want to use sex as a means of exchange as if it a favour they are doing for men...and its men like u thats always licking their àsss

advanceDNA:
The question u should always ask is what if a man loses his job inside the marriage?? Is this not the same thing that will happen??.

Out of all the places you quoted, this is the only place that makes a little sense.

My response?

You cannot compare a marriage to a boyfriend /girlfriend situation, especially where the interest of the girl has been placed on hold after pregnancy without any definite timeliness of when to make things right.

vanbonattel:
Why your DickThomas is still standing after you cannot pay common dowry is shocking.

Let your hands stand strong instead, to earn money to settle her family.

Why una no dey know how to express una self for public? Just type like person wey no get home training

vanbonattel:
That's an unfair statement. The girl is reacting to the present situation where the OP has probably not kept his own side of the bargain.

You are wrong, in most cases this is how withholding of sex starts in marriage. Are you saying if the lady doesn't do what the man desires he should with hold his money? Stop giving excuses for bad precedence.

vanbonattel:
That's an unfair statement. The girl is reacting to the present situation where the OP has probably not kept his own side of the bargain.

You are wrong, in most cases this is how withholding of sex starts in marriage. Are you saying if the lady doesn't do what the man desires he should with hold his money? Stop giving excuses for bad precedence...

vanbonattel:
Out of all the places you quoted, this is the only place that makes a little sense.

My response?

You cannot compare a marriage to a boyfriend /girlfriend situation, especially where the interest of the girl has been placed on hold after pregnancy without any definite timeliness of when to make things right.

Yawn.....she should have remained a virgin..all this one u are saying is medicine after death

vanbonattel:
This is not right guys, the way we make a demon out our women is not good enough. This is a guy that picked a girl and got her pregnant. Am sure no decent girl will allow that if she is not expecting to be married off properly.

Now the story changed, work no dey again and it's not this girls direct fault. We don't know what she is going through with her family, and the priority of my guy is to knack her because she visited. Girls take too much rubbish from us o.

My guy should man up and get something doing, even if its enough to pay only the bride price, take her home and then take care of the new family, with her help of course.

Ns mumu go agree to this your advice. This is how you all push people to taking decisions that won't argue well for them. All what you care is to do marriage even when the guy clearly stated that he is struggling at the moment.

He doesn't need to do any marriage in the short time, what he needs is money to plan for the delivery of the child that's the most important for now compared to any bride price. Bride price can come when he is ready for that, OP never put yourself in a precarious situation to please people and displease your mental health. Two adults take a decision but somehow it's only one adult that should be held responsible for what has transpired according to you. Wrong ideology

Sex starvation red flag

Omo me I no fit gree oooo...

It's not like the pregnancy will turn twins if I enter again.

Honestly, I will start thinking this babe na bad market...

You too the husband. You nor get work, still give am belle, still Wan Top-up. Wahrah ni eeh.


God will provide a good paying work, I want you to marry that girl and live happily ever after.. We need healthy kids for this our country.

Zeal0000007:
My wife of 3 months pregnant has constantly being rejecting sex, we did our intro couple of months ago, I have being trying to safe up to complete the marital rites along the line she took in. The family expressed their sadness especially her mom, but the whole family now knows she's heavy. My job is a contract job and couple of months now I have been out of contract. The family to a point has been understanding , though we're both separated in different states but close to each other. Currently she visited and stayed 2 days she didn't even allowed me stay with her as partners this someone that we communicate often on phone telling how we missed each other. She visited and repelled all my advances towards her. I don't know what is going on the next day she left the house . Is it because of pregnancy that is making her behave like this. How could she repelled my advances after not seeing her for 2months now, when I asked her what's the problem for her rejection she was asking me if she's a intimacy gadget , this is someone i have not seen for 2months .

After impregnating her, what else do you want?

You wanna dig borehole in her hmmm?ou


Jokes apart, the family could be responsible for that.
If to say you have the finances, you should convince her and take her to your house.

MightySparrow:
After impregnating her, what else do you want?

You wanna dig borehole in her hmmm?ou


Jokes apart, the family could be responsible for that.
If to say you have the finances, you should convince her and take her to your house.

Very reasonable comnent.