₦airaland Forum

oziegbep:
Greetings All,

Please I need serious advice.

I am currently dating a lady that I truly love. She is caring, enduring, financially stable etc. The truth is that this lady really loves me. But she's a single mum and its like an extra baggage to me. Am single and planning to get married to this lady, but the single mum status gives me sleepless nights.

I have asked her several times about the baby daddy, but she keeps telling me the dude abandoned her and the baby long ago and that she doesn't know he's whereabout.

Please I need advice on how I can cope. Because I truly love this lady alot

She doesn't know his whereabouts does not mean that she has closed that chapter of her life. Borrow sense.

A single mom might seem submissive at first, but once she gets what she needs, you might see her change. You may end up regretting marrying her. Even dating a single mom can be challenging.

oziegbep:
Greetings All,

Please I need serious advice.

I am currently dating a lady that I truly love. She is caring, enduring, financially stable etc. The truth is that this lady really loves me. But she's a single mum and its like an extra baggage to me. Am single and planning to get married to this lady, but the single mum status gives me sleepless nights.

I have asked her several times about the baby daddy, but she keeps telling me the dude abandoned her and the baby long ago and that she doesn't know he's whereabout.

Please I need advice on how I can cope. Because I truly love this lady alot

Don't try it. It is a death sentence. I married one and its my biggest regret ever. Realised my mistake and got out quickly. Now I am happily married and can tell you there is a difference. Do not try it. You will always come second in your own house. You will never be number one. EVER
A. She might be submissive now - its a game. she is just looking for a dad for the child.
B. Once the ex has hit it, he can always come back and hit it.
C. Yorubas will say. A house that has peace means the bastard child there has not grown. Once the bastard child grows up, that house will not know peace.

budaatum:
You don't truly love her enough or you'd love her child too. And if you can't love her and her child more, please move on and go marry someone else instead of making her miserable in future.

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Why should I take a child as mine whom his father abondon!

When talking about single mothers, not all of them were dumped by men that impregnated them, Some single mothers are children of circumstance and destiny has positioned them as such, for example, a young lady with one, two, three children that becomes a widow at a tender age would definitely seek love thereafter. So not all single mothers are bad.

shiwex:
Don't try it. It is a death sentence. I married one and its my biggest regret ever. Do not try it. You will always come second in your own house. You will never be number one. EVER

Can you please share your experience? Albeit briefly.

Some single mum are more better than the so called single girl, They have tested love and learned lesson in hard way . They behave when they get second chance. Bro, go ahead with the marriage. Accept her child as your first child and train the child with your future kids. Okay.

Some single mum are more better than the so called single girl, They have tested love and learned their lesson in a hard way . They behave when they get second chance. Bro, go ahead with the marriage. Accept her child as your first child and train the child with your future kids. Okay.

Most single mum's are just desperate and can settle for anything called man. Most are also bitter with men. Though they are strong willed, but you need to be very careful with them. Before you marry her or decide to marry her, tell her that her child will bear your surname to test her commitment to you. If she refuses, run away. Don't judge her by a single mistake though of getting pregnant out of wedluck. But put her through series of test before you marry her. Tell her to convert her properties to your surname and her first name after marriage. Ask her for the picture and name of her baby's daddy and check if the guy lives in the same state as you from social media. If the guy stays in the same state, their is likelihood she is still seeing him.

Congratulations

LIVINGICONREBOR:
Will you die if you begin your life on a "clean" slate rather than carrying baggage around? Or is it an abomination for a young gal with no child to love you? Let the "dead" mingle with the"dead". Single fathers should marry single mothers.Oh boy use your head e too early in the year to dey mumu.

Legend.

micflo28:
Most single mum's are just desperate and can settle for anything called man. Most are also bitter with men. Though they are strong willed, but you need to be very careful with them. Before you marry her or decide to marry her, tell her that her child will bear your surname to test her commitment to you. If she refuses, run away. Don't judge her by a single mistake though of getting pregnant out of wedluck. But put her through series of test before you marry her. Tell her to convert her properties to your surname and her first name after marriage. Ask her for the picture and name of her baby's daddy and check if the guy lives in the same state as you from social media. If the guy stays in the same state, their is likelihood she is still seeing him.

Will not advice this. Bear your name for what? Is the child yours, has the baby father been informed.? You can't just claim someone's else child as yours.

godwon01:
Some single mum are more better than the so called single girl, They have tested love and learned their lesson in a hard way . They behave when they get second chance. Bro, go ahead with the marriage. Accept her child as your first child and train the child with your future kids. Okay.

Bad advice

shiwex:
Will not advice this. Bear your name for what? Is the child yours, has the baby father been informed.? You can't just claim someone's else child as yours.

You mean I will take care of another man's child and the child still bears the fathers name who abandoned him? Then she better returns the child to the father. Ownership is responsibility and it comes with huge privileges. If he refuses ownership, let the man who takes it enjoy the privileges.

Jflex07:
Can you please share your experience? Albeit briefly.

I jus know if I have to d this all over, never with a single mum. Ever Too many negatives over positives

Anytime you're here to ask what to do about love, just know there is no love in the first place but mere infatuation influence by respect, pussy and wealth


Anytime you question your partner trust, love begins to diminished


You can't question or seek opinions of others on people you love because mind is independent in love decision taking

For you to make this a topic,you know that something is wrong with your move

Chemlite:
Why should I take a child as mine whom his father abondon!

Why should you be in love with a woman with a child who's father abandoned it?

I do have a suggestion though. Tell the woman to abandon the child so you can have her to yourself. Both of you can go throw the abandoned child in the dust bin.

micflo28:
You mean I will take care of another man's child and the child still bears the fathers name who abandoned him? Then she better returns the child to the father. Ownership is responsibility and it comes with huge privileges. If he refuses ownership, let the man who takes it enjoy the privileges.

I don't think you know what you're doing, you think life is about writing grammar

wirinet:
I vehemently disagree with you on this. He should not be forced or guilt tripped into taking responsibility he is not obliged to. That he loved the lady does not mean he should also take responsibility for her child. If he elects to, fine, but he should never be forced to. The lady should look for the baby daddy and let him take responsibility, except the lady was raped, she should know who she slept with.
In the alternative, her family should take responsibility for the upkeep of the child, afterall they are all related by blood.
Starting a relationship with such responsibility could be very emotionally and financially stressful on a young man. If the lady insist on taking the baby along with the bath, and he feels he is not ready to, he should waka.

No one is forcing or guilt tripping him into taking responsibility. Fact is he fell in love with a single mother who says the father is nowhere to be found, and if he doesn't like it, like you said, "he should waka".

Asking the woman to choose between him or her child is ridiculous though, but if you don't agree it is, read my suggestion above to Chemlite.

shiwex:
Don't try it. It is a death sentence. I married one and its my biggest regret ever Do not try it. You will always come second in your own house. You will never be number one. EVER
A. She might be submissive now - its a game. she is just looking for a dad for the child.
B. Once the ex has hit it, he can always come back and hit it.
C. Yorubas will say. A house that has peace means the bastard child there has not grown. Once the bastard child grows up, that house will not know peace.

LOL!

Serves you right

DonEd:
So are we saying that all single mothers are bad news?

We guys can sweet mouth a lady to make her believe she has found her heaven on earth o ly to abandon her after childbirth.

I really hope we stop this bashing for mistakes made by women who were given assurance by men.

Never clean up another person's mess.
Let them face the consequences of their poor decisions. And this doesn't apply to single mothers alone. For example, never give your friends/family money to settle debts that was collected without your knowledge for one irrelevant purpose or the other.

No just clean another person mess. Single mothers should clean up their mess themselves and the only way to do that is to marry another single father

If you love her marry her.

Largely depends on individuals, you will have to look beyond now and a little into her past ways of life as much as you can that led into her been a Single mother. I have two Single mums close to me, one I can't recommend her to anyone for marriage because it was her stupidity and waywardness that led her into it, while the second one became Single Mum from her unfortunate contact with a wicked man, who took advantage of her innocence's, to make her a single mother, the unfortunate man was her first ever. I will recommend her a 1000 times. So, it depends, if you can get a little into who she was before, it will help you make your decisions, no one can actually do that for you except those that know both of you.

I wish you all best of good luck

oziegbep:
Greetings All,

Please I need serious advice.

I am currently dating a lady that I truly love. She is caring, enduring, financially stable etc. The truth is that this lady really loves me. But she's a single mum and its like an extra baggage to me. Am single and planning to get married to this lady, but the single mum status gives me sleepless nights.

I have asked her several times about the baby daddy, but she keeps telling me the dude abandoned her and the baby long ago and that she doesn't know he's whereabout.

Please I need advice on how I can cope. Because I truly love this lady alot

Run o! Keep running🏃🏃🏃🏃

oziegbep:
Greetings All,

Please I need serious advice.

I am currently dating a lady that I truly love. She is caring, enduring, financially stable etc. The truth is that this lady really loves me. But she's a single mum and its like an extra baggage to me. Am single and planning to get married to this lady, but the single mum status gives me sleepless nights.

I have asked her several times about the baby daddy, but she keeps telling me the dude abandoned her and the baby long ago and that she doesn't know he's whereabout.

Please I need advice on how I can cope. Because I truly love this lady alot

Na you dey tell people she be single mother. Keep quiet and love.

Memyselfu2009:
If you love her marry her.

Only a woman will write such nonsense

Like many others before you, you'll learn the hard way.

If this cock and bull story is indeed true then hard lessons awaits you. Good luck 😜 🤞

😂 mumu man

Go and learn HTML, CSS and JavaScript

Namaster:
I have commented EXHAUSTIVELY on the perils of marrying or dating a single mother.

Check my profile for them.

But the summary is that single mothers are BAD NEWS.

They are FIT to fuuuccck because their bastards are walking testaments to their LOOSENESS. They CANNOT form when you have evidence they had been viciously RAWDOGGED in the past.

They are UNFIT for dating or marriage because, again, their bastards are walking testaments to their LOOSENESS.

Single-motherhood also points to a LOW IQ and STUPIDITY.

Because said woman not only CHOSE an irresponsible man who was willing to ABANDON his child. But ALSO chose to fuccck him WITHOUT condoms or other forms of birth control.

That stupidity would be a TAINT in the gene pool if both of you have children. Dumber kids will result.

There is a reason a LOT of the children of single mothers end up as Yahoo Boys and Hookup girls (future single mothers).

It's NOT just about the upbringing, or lack thereof, but also the STUPIDITY and IRRESPONSIBILITY inherent in their genes asserting themselves.

Also WHEN the father eventually shows up, the child you raised with your money, time and energy will DISCARD you without a second thought.

Chances are equally high the mother will do the same.

Fuccck her, if you must.
But NEVER marry a single mother!

this is harsh I must say, but there is an element of truth in it, my uncle married a single mom n her first child who doesn't belong to my uncle is 43 now n useless.
it's inherent I guess.

Most likely she is the financial partner in the relationship.

oziegbep:
Greetings All,

Please I need serious advice.

I am currently dating a lady that I truly love. She is caring, enduring, financially stable etc. The truth is that this lady really loves me. But she's a single mum and its like an extra baggage to me. Am single and planning to get married to this lady, but the single mum status gives me sleepless nights.

I have asked her several times about the baby daddy, but she keeps telling me the dude abandoned her and the baby long ago and that she doesn't know he's whereabout.

Please I need advice on how I can cope. Because I truly love this lady alot

The good Lord protect you in whatever you choose to do next with your life