₦airaland Forum

They called it, SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDERS and it usually manifests at teenagers, between ages. 14 yrs -18 yrs . Though, some carry it to adulthood.

For me, it happened to me in my secondary school days, whenever I wanted to toast girls I would be shaking, fear would overwhelmed me, the first girlfriend I dated, it was my friend that toasted her for me.

I started having boldness at 25.

I was a very shy boy growing up especially secondary school days, but I overcame the shyness when I got into higher institution and joined a drama team.

I was like that. Had to rehearse some lines and possible replies. If for some reasons, the babe's reply doesn't match one of my anticipated reply from her, I am dommed.

I became spontaneous later due to experience and self upgrade.

Now it isn't hard knowing bank account has stacks of stash.

Whatever you do in this life, make more money than you wife can be able to spend.

OndoRaph:
I was like that. Had to rehearse some lines and possible replies. If for some reasons, the babe's reply doesn't match one of my anticipated reply from her, I am dommed.

I became spontaneous later due to experience and self upgrade.

Now it isn't hard knowing bank account has stacks of stash.

Whatever you do in this life, make more money than you wife can be able to spend.

At what age is that? Because I have a friend in 40s still fidgeting to ask woman out.

It stems from self esteem issues (low self esteem is very common), social anxiety and neurodivergence.

The solution is exposure therapy, and also fixing your mindset. The more you expose yourself to the situation, the less the anxiety, and eventually you overcome the anxiety.

Lol

My friend in secondary school once approached a girl and out of anxiety...he called her and asked her what her name was😂😂😂


He was like....."queen,,what is your name"

The girl and her friends ridiculed him through out that academic session eh and we his friends didn't help matters.

Those days are far gone, Os has taken over. Men nor get time for this again

cassidy1996:
Those days are far gone, Os has taken over. Men nor get time for this again

And you think, secondary school guys not suffering from this now? I think it has to do with age, between 14-25 guys usually suffer from such type of shyness

Fiscus105:
At what age is that? Because I have a friend in 40s still fidgeting to ask woman out.

Wow! Wow!

That was my teenage age and early adulthood. I am now a grown man.

Fiscus105:
And you think, secondary school guys not suffering from this now? I think it has to do with age, between 14-25 guys usually suffer from such type of shyness

Exactly was my situation within that range.

Dress well smell nice and half of the job is already done

Not everyone is good in direct approach where you have to be dropping pick up lines ..

.some would rather use the slow route of getting acquainted, then getting to know them before finally dropping the bombshell .

I prefer the latter cause it helps me figure out who she really is and tells me if i would want to push further or not ..

Using direct approach like that . ,you fit go dey toast O.S make you no sabi...

Parenting could also be another factor. Some parents won't allow kids to mingle and socialize with their peers. This might later have a ripple effect, especially when it comes to relationships.

richiemcgold:
Parenting could also ba another factor. Some parents don't allow kids to mingle and socialize with their peers.

My Dad


Still shy though.

Thazard:
My Dad


Still shy though.

Have u successful toasted up to 5 ladies? Me too came from very disciplined parents, but I latter turned to jagaban.

Fiscus105:
Have u successful toasted up to 5 ladies? Me too came from very disciplined parents, but I latter turned to jagaban.

Not 1.


Since secondary school, girls have always been the ones making moves on me.


Right now as I don't meet lot of girls due to work, I'm shaky not because of the girl though but people looking around.


I'm that shy.

Thazard:
Not 1.


Since secondary school, girls have always been the ones making moves on me.


Right now as I don't meet lot of girls due to work, I'm shaky not because of the girl though but people looking around.


I'm that shy.

Which means you can't talk in front of many people.

Fiscus105:
Which means you can't talk in front of many people.

Yeah, self esteem issues.

My own pass self esteem issues.
I still cannot approach a girl face to face even if it is casually or platonic level and I am over 30.
Thank God for social media. I can say anything to anybody anonymously. It just limits the number of people I get to interact with.

Honestly internet do make us remember some things we have long forgotten. We all are guilty of this before becoming that bad good guy

It happens to most of introverts

Although you can get pass it if you develop strong zeal to overcome it

It happened to me, I couldn't be able toast girl until I reached 25yrs.

But now I can toast Tiwa Savage, etc

A little wine should've cured you. Rumoured as datch courage.

Till tomorrow, if you want to hear me stammer, just join me one on one with one fine girl.....


I have and will never toast any girl I meet for the first time no matter how much I like you....


I use the reverse psychology method thereby making myself so interesting that you'll come talk to me instead cause you'll be like, who is this guy that doesn't gives a Bleep about anybody apart from himself ...

Sometimes I mentally stimulate our bond from afar that you'll find yourself untop my bed first before you even know my real name sef....

Infact 90% of people don't call me by my real name....



Shit works every fucking time....

Therock5555:
Till tomorrow, if you want to hear me stammer, just join me one on one with one fine girl.....


I have and will never toast any girl I meet for the first time no matter how much I like you....


I use the reverse psychology method thereby making myself so interesting that you'll come talk to me instead cause you'll be like, who is this guy that doesn't gives a Bleep about anybody apart from himself ...

Sometimes I mentally stimulate our bond from afar that you'll find yourself untop my bed first before you even know my real name sef....

Infact 90% of people don't call me by my real name....



Shit works every fucking time....

With Ur method, you will only be dating, the girl that likes you naturally and not the girl you like. Vast majority of girls won't even look at Ur side no matter, reserved psychologists you employ to do Ur manipulations, until you talk.

Keep talking to them.. you will get used to it.. it's not rocket science. Have it in mind that it's either yes or no.. and either of the two answers doesn't kill or won't kill you. You learn from every encounter and you will become a pro. I am speaking from experience to any guy who still have this difficulty in talking to ladies. Good luck!

Guys now push you mentally and no longer physically

Fiscus105:
With Ur method, you will only be dating, the girl that likes you naturally and not the girl you like. Vast majority of girls won't even look at Ur side no matter, reserved psychologists you employ to do Ur manipulations, until you talk.

Before nkor... Why should I go for someone I like when there are tens of others drooling over me...


Be wise my brother...

It's more better make girl cook better delicacy come give you chop plus her delicacy than for you to take a girl out because you want to create an impression for something wey you no sure go follow you back home....



In this life, only the wise shall succeed...



Lemme shock you, if you jam girl wey you like wey fine wella and she's with a less beautiful bestie, target the bestie and you'll get your girl, if you know, you know....