₦airaland Forum

Dear Ladies, do this when a runaway father suddenly reappear to claim a child(ren) he abandoned. 👇👇

If a woman gets pregnant and have a child and the father of the child denies the pregnancy, aban.dons the woman and left her to singlehandedly care and fend for the child, the natural father of the child will not freely have a right to access the child except the mother agrees to it.

Please remember, that the child still belongs to the runaway natural father biologically and no culture can deny him his biological right simply because he did not marry the mother of the child.

However, he is not allowed to suddenly reappear and want to claim the child. If you allow him to freely appear and claim the child, it's your decision but your decision is not a wise one because you have allowed him to reap where he did not sow.

If a runaway father suddenly reappear to claim a child he neglected and abandoned for years, please don't drag with him, just give him one of these options:

1. Depending on the age of the child, tell him he can resume his presence in the life of the child on the condition that he pays you compensation for all the years of your troubles over the child. When asking for compensation, please speak in millions and not in thousands.

Depending on the age of the child and the number of years you have singlehandedly cared for the child, ask between ₦50million -₦200million. If he is willing to negotiate, you can negotiate and once he pays the agreed amount, you can then involve him in the life of the child and let the child bear his surname. Please, you are only granting him access and not custody. Make sure you involve a lawyer who will help you prepare a written agreement in this regard.

2. If the natural father refuses to agree to your out-of-court settlement, please tell him to file a case to claim the child in court. If he eventually files a case, get a family lawyer that will represent and defend your case. You will narrate all that transpired and how he suddenly reappeared to reap where he did not sow.

Trust me, the courts does not allow people reap where they did not sow especially when children are involved. You will tell the court that you are not denying him paternity but if he wants to be a part of the child's life, he should compensate you for your years of trouble. For as long as it's a court case, ask the court to award you ₦200million as damages/compensation.

Also, ask the court to award you money for the cost of engaging a lawyer for the case because if he had behaved well, you would not have spent money to engage a lawyer. Depending on the amount your lawyer charged you, your lawyer will know the amount to include as lawyer's fee.

During judgment, the court will order that he pays the damages before he can access the child. This means that the compensation must be paid first before he can eventually be part of the child's life.

From experience in most cases, these natural fathers will disappear just the same way they reappeared because they are not able to afford what the court asked them to pay.

The reason you need to ask for a huge sum of money is because the courts don't usually grant the exact amount you are demanding for. If you demand for ₦200million, the court can order ₦10,000 - ₦50million depending on the circumstances of the case. This is why you need to aim high so that if the court wants to bring the amount down, it will still be favourable to you. If you ask for ₦5million, you might get ₦500,000. If the children are like 2 or more, aim for ₦500million.

This is not sentiment, this is using the law to protect yourself, your child and your efforts from fathers who want to reap where they did not sow.

This also applies to married women who got separated from their husbands and are left to cater for the children alone.

Please note, if you intentionally cut off the father of the child from the life of the child, you won't be able to claim compensation because you did not give him a chance to be part of the child's life.

Remember, the law only help those who help themselves!

Please explain something to me

If the guy did not agree to your Out of court settlement and did not file any case,

Can you stop the child from looking for his/her father later in life?

Have you considered the effects of lack of father figure in the life of children?

Do you realize that training your own child is not a personal financial investment but for the future benefits to the child?

Any decision taken at such a situation should be at the very best interest of the child not you.
If allowing the child access to the father is the best decision for the child... Allow it regardless of the millions you have spent

Lol…. U dont even know what you are saying…. You are just throwing legal terms all over the place….

Birthing a child doesn’t make u automatic sole custodian to now use the child as leverage for extortion…... only the courts can award you such title so u technically have no right to deny the father …
Of course u can do wateva a u like because u are angry…..but u are the one in the wrong for deciding a father can’t have access to the child unless they pay you millions..
.… while the courts can sympathize with the mother for taking care of the child alone…. The child is not a bargaining chip in court …..no competent court judge will award u 50-100 millions for caring for you own child, so that u can now allow him see his child….. ..

And please ….stop throwing around the term “damages” in this context…. damages is the monetary compensation awarded to a party who has sustained a monetary value loss or injury due to the illegal action or breach of business contract by another party……. Caring for ur own child isn’t injury or loss… even if y’all are married….

A mother can only sue for child support……...in Nigeria the Absentee father will only be placed on school fees payment and child support which is dependent on income and also has a maximum limit…


Anyway good luck….u might find rich men like davido to demand 100million from…… oh I forgot..davido is a perfect example……

Please read the write up again and this time try to understand what was said.
Put sentiments and put the facts on ground.
THE WRITEUP SAID" ABANDONED.... Suddenly Reappear to claim CUSTODY" of a child the woman had laboured all her life to raise ...

She isn't denying him access but "CUSTODY "
PLEASE READ THE LINES CAREFULLY..



quote author=advanceDNA post=136902711]Lol…. U dont even know what you are saying…. You are just throwing legal terms all over the place….

Birthing a child doesn’t make u automatic sole custodian to now use the child as leverage for extortion…... only the courts can award you such title so u technically have no right to deny the father …
Of course u can do wateva a u like because u are angry…..but u are the one in the wrong for deciding a father can’t have access to the child unless they pay you millions..
.… while the courts can sympathize with the mother for taking care of the child alone…. The child is not a bargaining chip in court …..no competent court judge will award u 50-100 millions for caring for you own child, so that u can now allow him see his child….. ..

And please ….stop throwing around the term “damages” in this context…. damages is the monetary compensation awarded to a party who has sustained a monetary value loss or injury due to the illegal action or breach of business contract by another party……. Caring for ur own child isn’t injury or loss… even if y’all are married….

A mother can only sue for child support……...in Nigeria the Absentee father will only be placed on school fees payment and child support which is dependent on income and also has a maximum limit…


Anyway good luck….u might find rich men like davido to demand 100million from…… oh I forgot..davido is a perfect example……[/quote]

Please try and read the write up again

quote author=advanceDNA post=136902711]Lol…. U dont even know what you are saying…. You are just throwing legal terms all over the place….

Birthing a child doesn’t make u automatic sole custodian to now use the child as leverage for extortion…... only the courts can award you such title so u technically have no right to deny the father …
Of course u can do wateva a u like because u are angry…..but u are the one in the wrong for deciding a father can’t have access to the child unless they pay you millions..
.… while the courts can sympathize with the mother for taking care of the child alone…. The child is not a bargaining chip in court …..no competent court judge will award u 50-100 millions for caring for you own child, so that u can now allow him see his child….. ..

And please ….stop throwing around the term “damages” in this context…. damages is the monetary compensation awarded to a party who has sustained a monetary value loss or injury due to the illegal action or breach of business contract by another party……. Caring for ur own child isn’t injury or loss… even if y’all are married….

A mother can only sue for child support……...in Nigeria the Absentee father will only be placed on school fees payment and child support which is dependent on income and also has a maximum limit…


Anyway good luck….u might find rich men like davido to demand 100million from…… oh I forgot..davido is a perfect example……[/quote]

Are you a lawyer?

giftson102:
Please read the write up again and this time try to understand what was said.
Put sentiments and put the facts on ground.
THE WRITEUP SAID" ABANDONED.... Suddenly Reappear to claim CUSTODY" of a child the woman had laboured all her life to raise ...

She isn't denying him access but "CUSTODY "
PLEASE READ THE LINES CAREFULLY..

……

U are a comedian…trying to twist what u said…
All ur write up was about money, money, money, I only told u it doesn’t work that way in court…. No judge will give u 50 or 100 millions because u catered for ur own child when the father left…
u talked about claiming damages… nothing like damages in this context…… u don’t know what u are saying… u are just throwing around legal terms

giftson102:
Dear Ladies, do this when a runaway father suddenly reappear to claim a child(ren) he abandoned. 👇👇

If a woman gets pregnant and have a child and the father of the child denies the pregnancy, aban.dons the woman and left her to singlehandedly care and fend for the child, the natural father of the child will not freely have a right to access the child except the mother agrees to it.

Please remember, that the child still belongs to the runaway natural father biologically and no culture can deny him his biological right simply because he did not marry the mother of the child.

However, he is not allowed to suddenly reappear and want to claim the child. If you allow him to freely appear and claim the child, it's your decision but your decision is not a wise one because you have allowed him to reap where he did not sow.

If a runaway father suddenly reappear to claim a child he neglected and abandoned for years, please don't drag with him, just give him one of these options:

1. Depending on the age of the child, tell him he can resume his presence in the life of the child on the condition that he pays you compensation for all the years of your troubles over the child. When asking for compensation, please speak in millions and not in thousands.

Depending on the age of the child and the number of years you have singlehandedly cared for the child, ask between ₦50million -₦200million. If he is willing to negotiate, you can negotiate and once he pays the agreed amount, you can then involve him in the life of the child and let the child bear his surname. Please, you are only granting him access and not custody. Make sure you involve a lawyer who will help you prepare a written agreement in this regard.

2. If the natural father refuses to agree to your out-of-court settlement, please tell him to file a case to claim the child in court. If he eventually files a case, get a family lawyer that will represent and defend your case. You will narrate all that transpired and how he suddenly reappeared to reap where he did not sow.

Trust me, the courts does not allow people reap where they did not sow especially when children are involved. You will tell the court that you are not denying him paternity but if he wants to be a part of the child's life, he should compensate you for your years of trouble. For as long as it's a court case, ask the court to award you ₦200million as damages/compensation.

Also, ask the court to award you money for the cost of engaging a lawyer for the case because if he had behaved well, you would not have spent money to engage a lawyer. Depending on the amount your lawyer charged you, your lawyer will know the amount to include as lawyer's fee.

During judgment, the court will order that he pays the damages before he can access the child. This means that the compensation must be paid first before he can eventually be part of the child's life.

From experience in most cases, these natural fathers will disappear just the same way they reappeared because they are not able to afford what the court asked them to pay.

The reason you need to ask for a huge sum of money is because the courts don't usually grant the exact amount you are demanding for. If you demand for ₦200million, the court can order ₦10,000 - ₦50million depending on the circumstances of the case. This is why you need to aim high so that if the court wants to bring the amount down, it will still be favourable to you. If you ask for ₦5million, you might get ₦500,000. If the children are like 2 or more, aim for ₦500million.

This is not sentiment, this is using the law to protect yourself, your child and your efforts from fathers who want to reap where they did not sow.

This also applies to married women who got separated from their husbands and are left to cater for the children alone.

Please note, if you intentionally cut off the father of the child from the life of the child, you won't be able to claim compensation because you did not give him a chance to be part of the child's life.

Remember, the law only help those who help themselves!

I'm a man buh that's an evil of the highest. How can you impregnate a girl and abandon her to chest the whole responsibility after which you emerge from nowhere and lay claim of the baby?? The man should be in the prison the day he even think of that buh I don't think any court in Nigeria can have that audacity to award the mum such amount of money or even any amount due to the fact that paternity in Nigeria is more cultural than legally.