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This girl now feel so entitlement to my things now because have been gifting her stuffs.She is my step sister and in secondary school education SS2 .I took over paying her school fees even before we lost our dad last year.Her mum is dead and she is the only child.My siblings had asked me to be careful with her but I loved her so much and I used to feel pity for her.Though I am single close to my late 20s I decided to take responsibilities of her education because my dad stopped working a long time ago because of his health.
She now feel so entitled and I just hope it won't get out of hand in the future
What do you think guys?

You're the closest thing to a father figure that she has now, so don't disappoint/abandon her.
And just like a father, do only whatever is within your power for her.
No do pass yourself.

Her education is a top priority for now – let her focus on completing it. Afterward, encourage her to pick up a trade or learn a valuable skill, so she gains insight into how money is earned. If she grasps the effort behind making money and still feels entitled, it's okay to pull back until she appreciates the value. Because if she doesn't understand the worth of what she's getting, the day you can't provide might turn you into her adversary🤧🤧
🚶‍♂️

You have not clearly explained how she feels entitled. What exactly does she do that makes you conclude that she feels so entitled?

Mariangeles:
You're the closest thing to a father figure that she has now, so don't disappoint/abandon her.
And just like a father, do only whatever is within your power for her.
No do pass yourself.

Honestly I can't help abandoning her because my mind will be there

immortalcrown:
You have not clearly explained how she feels entitled. What exactly does she do that makes you conclude that she feels so entitled?

It's less about one big thing and more about a pattern. For example, she no longer asks for things.She expects them. She'll make decisions about my money or my time without consulting me, and gets upset or gives me the silent treatment when I say no or can't deliver. The gratitude has been replaced with expectations
I just hope it won't affect me later.That is the fear

Solofresh2:
It's less about one big thing and more about a pattern. For example, she no longer asks for things.She expects them. She'll make decisions about my money or my time without consulting me, and gets upset or gives me the silent treatment when I say no or can't deliver. The gratitude has been replaced with expectations
I just hope it won't affect me later.That is the fear

Oh! That's bad.
Really bad.

Don’t abandon her; keep paying her school fees, no matter what.

However, have a talk with her, not a warm or gentle one. Set clear boundaries.

Now this part is the most important bit. Then wait. When she crosses a boundary, you MUST act decisively and excessively. She needs to see that you mean what you say; she needs to feel the consequences to understand.

If you fail to act each time she crosses a line, or if your response isn’t strong enough to make an impact, she'll keep pushing and will never learn.

Let her give you the silent treatment if she wants; as long as she answers when spoken to and fulfils her responsibilities in the house, leave her be.

Solofresh2:
Honestly I can't help abandoning her because my mind will be there

let her find work this holiday, her mind will calm down.

Mariangeles:
Oh! That's bad.
Really bad.

exactly

Irrespective of whatever she does, just pay her school fees abeg. The street is not friendly for such girls oooooooo. If she sees a guy/boyfriend who will be paying her school fees, her kpekus go pay the guy back. So for the sake of God, just overlook her childishness and just pay. Ask yourself this question "would I have abandoned her if she were to be my daughter? ". So bros, abeg just help her till she finishes secondary school, atleast. But talk sense enter her head. I dey pity young girls because I know how military and rugged the street is to women. So that she doesn't get angry or irritated when see reads how I bash these non-virgins on social media. Do you know how painful it is to be a leftover (non-virgin) when you read my comments?

What do I even know sef aside enlightening my fellow men nationwide with the good news of DNA test

You have a whole lot to do. First of all, you need to give her life lessons. Money isn't that easy to be made and she should learn to show gratitude. Let her understand how rough the street and why she needs to delay gratification.

Probably, core values weren't installed in her by the parents. So, it's your turn to ensure that you stamp your authority as the elder. Follow her up with pure wisdom, let her know the harm behind sick entitlement. Let her know the harm behind peer pressure because she might be influenced by friends to make unnecessary demands and feels offended when it isn't granted.

You have a lot to show her. Don't just pay school fees and lock up. No, she is your daughter now and you need to teach her and numb that growing rebel spirit in her.

Everything will be fine, op.

Solofresh2:
This girl now feel so entitlement to my things now because have been gifting her stuffs.She is my step sister and in secondary school education SS2 .I took over paying her school fees even before we lost our dad last year.Her mum is dead and she is the only child.My siblings had asked me to be careful with her but I loved her so much and I used to feel pity for her.Though I am single close to my late 20s I decided to take responsibilities of her education because my dad stopped working a long time ago because of his health.
She now feel so entitled and I just hope it won't get out of hand in the future What do you think guys?

At this age, you still don't know how to set boundaries and enforce them?

[quote author=Solofresh2 post=1373nd in the future
What do you think guys?[/quote]She is your Sister! Caution her! You don't need to bring the story here for us to tell you how to talk to your sister.

Is she not your dad's child?

Until she do you evil, leave her and focus on yourself.

Solofresh2:
This girl now feel so entitlement to my things now because have been gifting her stuffs.She is my step sister and in secondary school education SS2 .I took over paying her school fees even before we lost our dad last year.Her mum is dead and she is the only child.My siblings had asked me to be careful with her but I loved her so much and I used to feel pity for her.Though I am single close to my late 20s I decided to take responsibilities of her education because my dad stopped working a long time ago because of his health.
She now feel so entitled and I just hope it won't get out of hand in the future
What do you think guys?

A question for you, is she your step or half sister? There's a reason I'm asking.

Solofresh2:
It's less about one big thing and more about a pattern. For example, she no longer asks for things.She expects them. She'll make decisions about my money or my time without consulting me, and gets upset or gives me the silent treatment when I say no or can't deliver. The gratitude has been replaced with expectations
I just hope it won't affect me later.That is the fear

Now, your point is clear. Just stay within your limit while playing father roles in her life. Don't deny her what you can afford. Don't steal to give her everything she wants.

What’s she entitled too in the first place??
A 14/15 kid will ask you for everything in the word of you are his/her elder sis or bro…
You said your father can’t work and her mom is dead,how do you expect her to survive at that age..:
Follow young boys or bill her brothers
You can do better bro

ibiba55:
A question for you, is she your step or half sister? There's a reason I'm asking.

half sister The same father with different mothers

Kobojunkie:
At this age, you still don't know how to set boundaries and enforce them?

Am just thinking she won't feel so entitled in the future

[quote author=MarketDispatch post=137351028][/quote]Not that i can't talk to her.I just fear she won't get so entitled in the future

Noblejohn32:
You have a whole lot to do. First of all, you need to give her life lessons. Money isn't that easy to be made and she should learn to show gratitude. Let her understand how rough the street and why she needs to delay gratification.

Probably, core values weren't installed in her by the parents. So, it's your turn to ensure that you stamp your authority as the elder. Follow her up with pure wisdom, let her know the harm behind sick entitlement. Let her know the harm behind peer pressure because she might be influenced by friends to make unnecessary demands and feels offended when it isn't granted.

You have a lot to show her. Don't just pay school fees and lock up. No, she is your daughter now and you need to teach her and numb that growing rebel spirit in her.

Everything will be fine, op.

Thanks

Gggjhhj:
Is she not your dad's child?

Yes she is

Balance me here real quick, is she your step sister or half sister?🤔🤔🤔

Solofresh2:
This girl now feel so entitlement to my things now because have been gifting her stuffs.She is my step sister and in secondary school education SS2 .I took over paying her school fees even before we lost our dad last year.Her mum is dead and she is the only child.My siblings had asked me to be careful with her but I loved her so much and I used to feel pity for her.Though I am single close to my late 20s I decided to take responsibilities of her education because my dad stopped working a long time ago because of his health.
She now feel so entitled and I just hope it won't get out of hand in the future
What do you think guys?

Solofresh2:
This girl now feel so entitlement to my things now because have been gifting her stuffs.She is my step sister and in secondary school education SS2 .I took over paying her school fees even before we lost our dad last year.Her mum is dead and she is the only child.My siblings had asked me to be careful with her but I loved her so much and I used to feel pity for her.Though I am single close to my late 20s I decided to take responsibilities of her education because my dad stopped working a long time ago because of his health.
She now feel so entitled and I just hope it won't get out of hand in the future
What do you think guys?

U have not said anything here that has shown she is entitled. All we are just seeing here is complain without necessarily talking about the stuff that happened

Solofresh2:
half sister The same father with different mothers

Then do what you have to do for her, believe me she just a teenager, that's how they behave sometimes. Calm down and make see things your way.

Samantha125:
Balance me here real quick, is she your step sister or half sister?🤔🤔🤔

half sister.The same father with different mothers.Her mother is dead

Is your father in a polygamous marriage?, or he cheated on your mother with her mother?

Because I don't understand why would a man have multiple children with multiple women when he doesn't have the means to look after them... It's really not your responsibility to be filling in the shoes of your irresponsible father.

You can help where you can, but it's not your responsibility.

Solofresh2:
half sister.The same father with different mothers.Her mother is dead

Samantha125:
Is your father in a polygamous marriage?, or he cheated on your mother with her mother?

Because I don't understand why would a man have multiple children with multiple women when he doesn't have the means to look after them... It's really not your responsibility to be filling in the shoes of your irresponsible father.

You can help where you can, but it's not your responsibility.

He actually cheated on my mom

Now you have to take responsibility for his own irresponsible and selfish actions? You and your mother are good people, that's all I can say.

Solofresh2:
He actually cheated on my mom

Still can't see how she is entitled. Could you be specific