₦airaland Forum

ZaddyJ:
Omg! Did you discuss this with any older person in his family if he can be called to other?

OLOKOESHIN:
Order



Not to chase clout actually just out of curiosity

ibechris:
Sexually,ur problem started from the first day u accepted to marry a man who is far older than u.

Secondly,a gambler is far worse than all the vices u can think of except bandits and armed robbery added with alcohol. Otilo!

Collecting and degrading u financially...madam. The truth is that,u are not learning anything in that marriage even with the age difference.

Advice:
If u were my sister,I would have brought u back home long ago. U are wasting away. Gamblers are senseless people. They have no future,they are the scum of this nation. On loan apps they exhausted them for easy cash just to continue gambling.

Madam,run for ur good,u can't tame such a man. It would coat u alot. Only time shall tell.

Kobicove:
He does not beat you, he does not cheat on you, he does not abuse you emotionally...

There in nothing here to suggest your marriage is falling apart.

The real issue you have is the fact that your husband does not have money

Cherryediva:
Hello everyone, sorry for the long post
I got married at 22, my husband was 40 at the time. We have been married for 5 years and we have a child together.

My concern is that my husband is not able to satisfy me sexually at all, which is frustrating, I have talked to him about it nothing seems to change. Financially, he is struggling, partly because he gambles a lot. He also drinks alcohol heavily.

I work too but he doesn't want me to have my own money he is always collecting money from me.
He doesn’t have clear goals, ambition, or a vision for the future, and this makes me feel stagnant in the marriage.

He is a good man in terms of character. He doesn’t cheat, he doesn’t abuse me at all, and he treats me well overall.

I’m confused because while he is good to me, I feel stuck and unfulfilled. I would really appreciate advice from y'all who have been in similar situations or who can offer honest guidance.
Thank you.

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Sonnobax15:

He doesn't cheat

How broke man wan take cheat?

I'm speaking from experience tho .

Sonnobax15:

He doesn't cheat

How broke man wan take cheat?

I'm speaking from experience tho .

Cherryediva:
Hello everyone, sorry for the long post
I got married at 22, my husband was 40 at the time. We have been married for 5 years and we have a child together.

My concern is that my husband is not able to satisfy me sexually at all, which is frustrating, I have talked to him about it nothing seems to change. Financially, he is struggling, partly because he gambles a lot. He also drinks alcohol heavily.

I work too but he doesn't want me to have my own money he is always collecting money from me.
He doesn’t have clear goals, ambition, or a vision for the future, and this makes me feel stagnant in the marriage.

He is a good man in terms of character. He doesn’t cheat, he doesn’t abuse me at all, and he treats me well overall.

I’m confused because while he is good to me, I feel stuck and unfulfilled. I would really appreciate advice from y'all who have been in similar situations or who can offer honest guidance.
Thank you.

Google Image

Sonnobax15:

He doesn't cheat

How broke man wan take cheat?

I'm speaking from experience tho .

Cherryediva:
Hello everyone, sorry for the long post
I got married at 22, my husband was 40 at the time. We have been married for 5 years and we have a child together.

My concern is that my husband is not able to satisfy me sexually at all, which is frustrating, I have talked to him about it nothing seems to change. Financially, he is struggling, partly because he gambles a lot. He also drinks alcohol heavily.

I work too but he doesn't want me to have my own money he is always collecting money from me.
He doesn’t have clear goals, ambition, or a vision for the future, and this makes me feel stagnant in the marriage.

He is a good man in terms of character. He doesn’t cheat, he doesn’t abuse me at all, and he treats me well overall.

I’m confused because while he is good to me, I feel stuck and unfulfilled. I would really appreciate advice from y'all who have been in similar situations or who can offer honest guidance.
Thank you.

Google Image

Kobojunkie:
Op, you are young. So, I compiled a list of Nairaland links of experiences of other women marked to addicts for you to read.

https://www.nairaland.com/5350689/man-loses-wife-gamble-asks#81097962

https://www.nairaland.com/8028635/pls-nigerians-save-me-husband#128909270

https://www.nairaland.com/7876400/married-virgin-married-love-yet#126389949

https://www.nairaland.com/7833987/christian-not-enough-reason-divorce#125674729

https://www.nairaland.com/7691529/how-suppose-fight-home-here#123174991

https://www.nairaland.com/7615626/husband-annoying-im-depress#121817995

---

There are numerous other testimonies of women who were married to gambling and/or alcohol addicts on reddit and other forums for you to read and learn the truth of how very difficult and almost impossible it is for you to win over when in a relationship with a person who struggles with at least one addiction. 🥱🥱🥱

Let me know and I will find and post links from there.🥱🥱🥱

Sonnobax15:

He doesn't cheat

How broke man wan take cheat?

I'm speaking from experience tho .

Sonnobax15:

He doesn't cheat

How broke man wan take cheat?

I'm speaking from experience tho .

edet19892015:
Unless you understand your role in society, you can never make any meaningful contribution.

According to the Greeks, they are three types of people on Earth,
1. The idiots,
2. The tribesmen, and
3. The citizens.

Studies show only 10% of Africans are citizens.
The remaining 90% are either tribesmen or idiots.

1. When the Greeks used the word "Idiot", they did not use it as a curse word.
Idiots are people who just don’t care.
If they sit for exams, they will cheat.
If they are in government they will steal.

An idiot does not care at all, if he eats bananas he throws the peels anywhere instead of putting them in a trash bin.

IDIOTS won't attend monthly neighborhood meetings. They won't pay security dues. They won't contribute to community development. Even when they see or know about something that will harm others in the community they won't report it. When they see/know/have something that will benefit their community they won't share.

In fact, Idiots don't care to register for or vote in an election, yet they complain the most. If they register to vote, IDIOTS will sell their votes for peanuts.

According to the Greeks, some societies have more idiots than tribesmen and citizens.

2. The next set of people are "Tribesmen", these are people that look at everything from the point of view of their tribe.

These are people that believe in you only if you are part of their tribe.
It can be terrible to have a tribesman as a leader, he will alienate the rest.

When the Greeks talk about tribes, it’s not just about ethnicity, they also consider religion, gang membership, group membership, party membership and even cult membership as a tribe.

A great percentage of Africans are tribesmen, because they view everything from the point of view of their tribes. They trust only their tribesmen

3. The last group are "Citizens".
These are people who like to do things the right way.
They will respect traffic light rules even if no one is watching them.

They drive within speed limits.
They respect the laws, and won’t cheat in exams.
In government, they won’t steal.
They are compassionate and give to others to promote their well-being.

Citizens often promote projects that benefit everyone.
The Greeks called this group "The Citizens".

Some countries have more citizens than tribesmen and idiots, others have so many idiots.

A tribesman can become a citizen through orientation.
And an idiot can become a citizen by training and constant enforcement of the law.

But things fall apart if you elect an idiot or tribesman to lead you if he has not been reformed.

Where do you belong? Are you an idiot, a tribesman or a citizen? Reflect on your life.
Reflect about your immediate community, city, state and nation.

#EdetEdemAkpan #Share

ZaddyJ:
Omg! Did you discuss this with any older person in his family if he can be called to order?

Precious201010:
Let me contribute mine..

1: Unable to satisfy u sexually, there's really nothing that u can do about it... The age gap is the main issue, sometimes u want it hard and fast, but he's a little bit old for that.. he's close to 50...

2: Gambling, here is the main problem, the chances of Winning bet these days, u need more than spiritual goggles, betting will only make u poorer and give u a force hope, if Man-U no spoil the ticket Borussia Dortmund will do it... Let's not even talk about virtual bet, that one is worse than the devil himself..

3: from all indication, he's a good man, and the union already produced a child, he doesn't beat or abuse u, he takes care of u and the child, u can't have it all at the same time, some marriages the man satisfy them, but usually abuse them physically or emotionally...

My advice: remain in the marriage, try and talk to him as u have always done, there are other ways to satisfy a woman without penetration.

Mikocake:
I’m having the feeling that Op feels the husband deprived her of her youthful life by marrying her off @22, but my sister let me tell you the truth, nothing dey street oo. I don’t know who might be advising or influencing you to feel inadequate in your marriage but there are no perfect marriage anywhere. I’ve seen cases like this and the women always turn bitter after leaving their husbands because they realize there’s no love in the street. Don’t leave your home to turn sidechick to someone’s else husband oo. All the problems you listed about your husband can be worked on. I think his inability in bed can be attributed to his habit of drinking alcohol which when cut out or reduced, will get better. If his father is still alive, talk to him about the situation or a male figure that he respects. And remember, please don’t cheat on him cuz once you do, kiss your marriage goodbye. Men who don’t cheat hardly forgive cheating oo

delpee:
➜I think if you focus on how to get him out of his drinking and gambling habits, resolving other issues will be easier. If you have a good relationship with his parents, you can discuss this with them.
➜He's poor because he gambles and spends unwisely. Too much alcohol can affect your love life. Maybe that's why you're not satisfied.[b] He should focus on his personal development to increase his financial base instead of pulling your own resources down the waste pipe like his. [/b]Remember that you have a child to care for and a future to build.

Cherryediva:
Hello everyone, sorry for the long post
I got married at 22, my husband was 40 at the time. We have been married for 5 years and we have a child together.

My concern is that my husband is not able to satisfy me sexually at all, which is frustrating, I have talked to him about it nothing seems to change. Financially, he is struggling, partly because he gambles a lot. He also drinks alcohol heavily.

I work too but he doesn't want me to have my own money he is always collecting money from me.
He doesn’t have clear goals, ambition, or a vision for the future, and this makes me feel stagnant in the marriage.

He is a good man in terms of character. He doesn’t cheat, he doesn’t abuse me at all, and he treats me well overall.

I’m confused because while he is good to me, I feel stuck and unfulfilled. I would really appreciate advice from y'all who have been in similar situations or who can offer honest guidance.
Thank you.

Google Image