₦airaland Forum

Apart from that self, the economy is not smiling.

Whatever you decide to do has its own peculiar challenges, married or not married. No one is free man. Hold unto God to surmount whatever challenges that may come your way.

This same topic coming in as many flavours possible. Nairaland is a waste of time.

No one gaf if you marry or not.

CHoccolaTE:
To all the guys that are not planning to get married but want kids at the same time, better get professional surrogate mother's to carry the pregnancy and pay her afterwards.

Also get professional wet nurse to breastfeed your kids and pay her after she's done with breastfeeding.

Also get professional nanny to take care of your kids, bathe them, feed them, keep them safe from killing themselves while you go to work. Everyday.

DO NOT GET BABY MAMAS.

You people are looking for women to turn to single mothers and to destroy with your selfishness. You claim women don't contribute anything but you want to get baby mamas to bear your kids and take care of them free of charge. Una dey crase.

Stupid mad men.

Hey feminista, your opinion doesn't really count on this thread, men are getting wiser in this age of hookup and bitter feminism. Who takes care of a baby free of charge? She go fit? We'll simply send our baby mamas bread and tell them to keep walking. If you ladies were really wise, why get pregnant out of wedlock in the first place and later claim victim? Keep walking joor.

Oga come join us. If you are a boy remain single,if you count yourself as a man,no fear marriage. No let anybody scare you. I have never regret being married and I never regret it in Jesus name.
You can see,I mentioned Jesus nam to tell you say no be my power.

ibechris:
And here I am saying, get married or continue to listen to them.

This year would make me 11yrs in marriage and I have no regret one bit.

U can choose to listen to those men and still regret not marrying as earlier planned.

Lastly,always check up the background of any woman u want to marry and u the woman,do same to ur said man...doing this would save ur life completely and u will never regret it any day.

You can check the background of a woman, physically, spiritually and see nothing wrong but by the time you don enter you go come dey see karishika performance. If your marriage sweet just thank your star, a lot of men are dying in silence from what they are going through all in the name of marriage.

Babatunjo:
So I was at dinner with a friend this week. Guy has been married for about 8 years now... married almost immediately after uni. Tall guy, always had fine girlfriends back in school. You’d think na him go dey hype marriage pass.

Out of nowhere, he just sighed and said he regrets marrying… apart from the kids.
His advice shocked me.

He said if he were single again in 2026 Nigeria, he would never marry. That I should just find a woman, have between 1 to 3 kids if I want, make her comfortable, take care of my responsibilities... but avoid marriage completely.

I laughed it off, but then it hit me:
My boss had told me something very similar some time ago.
Then I remembered a former neighbour... fine wife, two kids, lovely family pictures on social media... he also warned me not to rush into marriage.

These are not bitter, broke men o. These are men society would call “successful”.

So now I’m asking myself (and una): Wetin really dey happen?
Is marriage quietly becoming something different from what we were sold?

They said don't rush not don't get married. You misinterpreted it. If you like no marry, dey there.

fyneboi79:
I had also been married for 10 years and I saw hell, before I regained my freedom out of sheer luck...if I ever hear marriage again ehh

Nb: For all those saying if you marry right abi you marry wrong.....there is nothing like marry wrong or right because for any marriage to survive then the man must always act the fool.

very correct.

Babatunjo:
So I was at dinner with a friend this week. Guy has been married for about 8 years now... married almost immediately after uni. Tall guy, always had fine girlfriends back in school. You’d think na him go dey hype marriage pass.

Out of nowhere, he just sighed and said he regrets marrying… apart from the kids.
His advice shocked me.

He said if he were single again in 2026 Nigeria, he would never marry. That I should just find a woman, have between 1 to 3 kids if I want, make her comfortable, take care of my responsibilities... but avoid marriage completely.

I laughed it off, but then it hit me:
My boss had told me something very similar some time ago.
Then I remembered a former neighbour... fine wife, two kids, lovely family pictures on social media... he also warned me not to rush into marriage.

These are not bitter, broke men o. These are men society would call “successful”.

So now I’m asking myself (and una): Wetin really dey happen?
Is marriage quietly becoming something different from what we were sold?

But they're married nonetheless, right? How many of them has divorced? Or better still, how many of them has separated from their wife?
They might be genuinely advising you not to marry but let me tell you, the alternative which is not getting married is worse. Ask those who are of marriageble age but for some reasons couldn't, widowers, separated, they will tell you that the alternative which is loneliness is worse.

Love800:
Bride price is usually 20, 100, 1000naira. Its nothing to the family. Just a show or cultural practice.

The main money problem is buying everything on the list. As a man, its expected you pay atleast to show a bit responsibility.

What am not doing is white wedding. No time for dat.

But telling me to have a baby-mama that will stay miles away from me with my kids and me sending funds everytime to her as if am paying levies to unions, associations, local govt is silly to me.

Calm down na you and am born the pikin, the day you get send money, the day you no get lock up she must find money, but if na the one wey you and am day house them go frustrate shege commot for your life.

He should divorce his wife. Thankfully he is in Nigeria and has nothing to lose.

With me and her at home, i can control my resources efficiently.
Making decisions will be easier too because the other party is physically present to collaborate with the command.

Many wrongs involved in baby-mama stuffs. I will not advise my enemy to thread that path sef.

mysticwarrior:
Calm down na you and am born the pikin, the day you get send money, the day you no get lock up she must find money, but if na the one wey you and am day house them go frustrate shege commot for your life.

Eraddray:
It's a rubbish advise at the end of the day... loneliness hit different when u're old...from 65yrs upwards...either for a man or woman..
Tho u will face challenges...as long as she's not cheating on u...u will surely find a balance and it's surely worth the stress at the end..cuz anybody wey marry and the wife dey cheat on him...na another man wife he marry oo..no be him wife

You are very correct but old age is a very lonely age no matter how rich one is..cos ur children would have their lives to live, they would visit occasionally, most of one's age mate might be dead, ones siblings might also be dead, if u are wealthy which most ppl feel will make them immune to the loneliness associated with old age they think they can employ staff to cater for them but at that age the so called staff see you as a cash cow, looking for every opportunity to steal from u and God help you they don't murder you to steal ur valuables..I have decided anything I am not happy with in my marriage I get it outside after all many things made me attracted to my wife when I eventually found out somethings I didn't like I outsourced it..I love sex but my wife doesn't.. I got one sharp fwb who I call anytime i am in the mood.take care of her needs and she is a good gal.

Orlandoo:
Even if you marry the right person, it is women that benefits the most in marriage.

What exactly are women benefiting, your mom dropped her father's name, took your father's name, by that she chose a new family. She cooks, clean and nurture you, what do you guys want from women, aren't men supposed to be the head of the table and provider? Being Married is far better than baby mama.

Marry right and have peace of mind. Trust me, I have been married for years and would recommend it.

Babatunjo:
So I was at dinner with a friend this week. Guy has been married for about 8 years now... married almost immediately after uni. Tall guy, always had fine girlfriends back in school. You’d think na him go dey hype marriage pass.

Out of nowhere, he just sighed and said he regrets marrying… apart from the kids.
His advice shocked me.

He said if he were single again in 2026 Nigeria, he would never marry. That I should just find a woman, have between 1 to 3 kids if I want, make her comfortable, take care of my responsibilities... but avoid marriage completely.

I laughed it off, but then it hit me:
My boss had told me something very similar some time ago.
Then I remembered a former neighbour... fine wife, two kids, lovely family pictures on social media... he also warned me not to rush into marriage.

These are not bitter, broke men o. These are men society would call “successful”.

So now I’m asking myself (and una): Wetin really dey happen?
Is marriage quietly becoming something different from what we were sold?

The demands, pressure and heat is just too much for men, the reward does not equal to or measure up at all. What can you get in marriage that you can't get out of it?

Intimacy that you might get married for in order to be straight with God, married men get less of it, you will later have to use money to buy pussy. Then you can't travel anyhow, chase dreams anyhow.... I am doing things now that I had to put on hold for marriage and raising family now, something I should have done 7 5 years ago but relentless bills after marriage won't let me.

Just think we'll before you start. But if you are lucky to find a good girl which is rare. You may go ahead. But they are all good girls before marriage, it's after marriage that they turn to something else.

With the way you addressed him, baby Mama is better. If he is single, and you address him like this, you will make him more determined to remain single

Inyaky:
What exactly are women benefiting, your mom dropped her father's name, took your father's name, by that she chose a new family. She cooks, clean and nurture you, what do you guys want from women, aren't men supposed to be the head of the table and provider? Married is far better than baby mama.

Update147:
I have been married for 6 months, and if I where to take back the hands of time, I would never use the word marriage in my mouth.

That regular quote that people say "women change after marriage" that quote is very correct.

Today I am still in marriage because if I leave, what will people say ?

Expantiate, how did she change?

Babatunjo:
So I was at dinner with a friend this week. Guy has been married for about 8 years now... married almost immediately after uni. Tall guy, always had fine girlfriends back in school. You’d think na him go dey hype marriage pass.

Out of nowhere, he just sighed and said he regrets marrying… apart from the kids.
His advice shocked me.

He said if he were single again in 2026 Nigeria, he would never marry. That I should just find a woman, have between 1 to 3 kids if I want, make her comfortable, take care of my responsibilities... but avoid marriage completely.

I laughed it off, but then it hit me:
My boss had told me something very similar some time ago.
Then I remembered a former neighbour... fine wife, two kids, lovely family pictures on social media... he also warned me not to rush into marriage.

These are not bitter, broke men o. These are men society would call “successful”.

So now I’m asking myself (and una): Wetin really dey happen?
Is marriage quietly becoming something different from what we were sold?

the people who voted I will get married are all female between the evening newspaper 📰🗞️ era

That's his business, he married the wrong woman.



If your friend wey dey work for NNPC go against company rules/regulations and dem sack am you go turn down the offer as a jobless man if you get employment there?

Na God chose for you again? You want kee God? Everything God God. The several things he's doing for you never do? God has stopped picking wives for men since the time of Adam and Eve. Adam blamed God for giving him a wife after the wife brought gbege into their life. After that time, God vex and sworn never to give any man a wife again but if any man is ready for a wife, go out am look for a good wife of your own.......God don resigned that duty tey tey.........

Sirhush:
Marriage is not a child play, many man life ended because dey marry the wrong woman. And that is why if you want to marry in this 2026, way hookup full everywhere, you need stay close to God so he can choose for you

It's just like saying don't enter a vehicle because of accidents.
Yes there will be accidents on the roads and there will be marital breakups.
Why ?
Because the earth is programmed to malfunction because of the sin of Adam.
Remedy: Jesus Christ being allowed to be SAVIOUR and LORD of your soul and that of the world.

Biggest regret ever, i had rather adopt an homeless dog than enrolling in that institution again.

Bro don't be scared go into it your own case may be different

Babatunjo:
So I was at dinner with a friend this week. Guy has been married for about 8 years now... married almost immediately after uni. Tall guy, always had fine girlfriends back in school. You’d think na him go dey hype marriage pass.

Out of nowhere, he just sighed and said he regrets marrying… apart from the kids.
His advice shocked me.

He said if he were single again in 2026 Nigeria, he would never marry. That I should just find a woman, have between 1 to 3 kids if I want, make her comfortable, take care of my responsibilities... but avoid marriage completely.

I laughed it off, but then it hit me:
My boss had told me something very similar some time ago.
Then I remembered a former neighbour... fine wife, two kids, lovely family pictures on social media... he also warned me not to rush into marriage.

These are not bitter, broke men o. These are men society would call “successful”.

So now I’m asking myself (and una): Wetin really dey happen?
Is marriage quietly becoming something different from what we were sold?

Tenses:
You'd think you're a proper man until you get married and marriage will go into the deepest part of your soul and exhume the demon in you.

^^^

Tenses:
If you're a weak man the demon will take over you and what we see is an abusive and irresponsible husband and father. But the strong will cage it. You'd be left struck on the type of person you'd have been.

^^^


"Strong"?

There are many who thought they were 'strong' until they came up against the demon you speak about. He that thinketh he standeth - let him take heed lest he fall.

Babatunjo:
So I was at dinner with a friend this week. Guy has been married for about 8 years now... married almost immediately after uni. Tall guy, always had fine girlfriends back in school. You’d think na him go dey hype marriage pass.

Out of nowhere, he just sighed and said he regrets marrying… apart from the kids.
His advice shocked me.

He said if he were single again in 2026 Nigeria, he would never marry. That I should just find a woman, have between 1 to 3 kids if I want, make her comfortable, take care of my responsibilities... but avoid marriage completely.

I laughed it off, but then it hit me:
My boss had told me something very similar some time ago.
Then I remembered a former neighbour... fine wife, two kids, lovely family pictures on social media... he also warned me not to rush into marriage.

These are not bitter, broke men o. These are men society would call “successful”.

So now I’m asking myself (and una): Wetin really dey happen?
Is marriage quietly becoming something different from what we were sold?

I don't hate am married but it expensive, the idea someone want me to make them feel they are special, don't need someone to make me feel special. All I know is am human and lucky. But it expensive 😕

Orlandoo:
One of my guy married a very beautiful girl. They have three kids. People envy his marriage. He built upstairs. Have his own car. Doing very well in biz. I was shocked to the marrow the night we were having a drink and this my guy, after some bottles, was literally crying, telling me what he is passing through in the hands of his wife and her family. The worst thing is that the wife created problem between him and his siblings. Now he is dying inside without any of his siblings caring about him. This is someone that people wish to be in his shoes.

My elder bro changed after he got married, I dey mostly sense contempt when we talk. He just dey try hide am just for humanity, and probably blood sake. I think the wife did a good job on the divide. She basically sabi many things about we his siblings. Afterall, I just be math teacher wey no get level to them...

ollyboy900:
Biggest regret ever, i had rather adopt an homeless dog than enrolling in that institution again.

Bros, tell your experience.