₦airaland Forum

Christian36:
Let me start with this for those that will come to attack me, I'm not into woman things, just that I'm over due to get married. The issue now is that whenever I get a lady contact less than two weeks the lady looses interest, I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I just want a lady I will settle down with. The second to the last and the last one just lost interest within a week. I have started seeing it as a spiritual thing. I will appreciate your advice because I'm really confused now.

immortalcrown:
It is not spiritual.

Know your worth and go for your type (class). That's all.

You are probably going for unsuitable ones.

Kobicove:
It has nothing to do with any spiritual BS!

There's something about you that is putting them off

Christian36:
That is the problem, If I can figure it out, I believe this case will be solved

kals4luv990:
Knack dem well and Dey will stay

BikoMERCYme:
Probably u they cud sense u so desperate to get married and tis getting Dem pissed off......

Christian36:
When you are still in talking stage in less than 2 weeks of collecting their contacts

Christian36:
Let me start with this for those that will come to attack me, I'm not into woman things, just that I'm over due to get married. The issue now is that whenever I get a lady contact less than two weeks the lady looses interest, I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I just want a lady I will settle down with. The second to the last and the last one just lost interest within a week. I have started seeing it as a spiritual thing. I will appreciate your advice because I'm really confused now.

advanceDNA:
Baba …its nothing…
Na so relationship be these days… pple are more shallow and superficial than ever…more interested in their phones, social media entertainment than engaging pple….
U just need small patience and also some tactics to engage women….because the truth women do very little to keep the spark alive at talking stage… na u go find common ground, initiate outings, call more, and be funny, etc…. No use money oooooooooooo, nor start what u cant sustain oooooooooo

No worry baba….u go dey alright las las

Christian36:
Thanks my bros, I once tried to be funny with one, na like so the lady lost interest... Again if the whole effort are coming from me, do you think such relationship will last because relationship should be mutual not for the other one to be acting as if they are above you.

advanceDNA:
The whole effort wont be from your continuously…if the first stages women dey always make u do more… her response will and effort will later balance with your own….if nit give am red card if u realize u are overdoing to keep the relationship alive

Christian36:
Let me start with this for those that will come to attack me, I'm not into woman things, just that I'm over due to get married. The issue now is that whenever I get a lady contact less than two weeks the lady looses interest, I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I just want a lady I will settle down with. The second to the last and the last one just lost interest within a week. I have started seeing it as a spiritual thing. I will appreciate your advice because I'm really confused now.

RemoteNaija:
You are ignored because you likely don't bring 'Perceived Value' to the table yet. It sounds harsh, but human beings are transactional—we respond to value. Increase your worth (socially, financially, or intellectually), and you won't have to fight for attention. You become the magnet.

Christian36:
Let me start with this for those that will come to attack me, I'm not into woman things, just that I'm over due to get married. The issue now is that whenever I get a lady contact less than two weeks the lady looses interest, I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I just want a lady I will settle down with. The second to the last and the last one just lost interest within a week. I have started seeing it as a spiritual thing. I will appreciate your advice because I'm really confused now.

balaclava:
Do you have a good source of income?
Are you making money?
Do you have a job?

advanceDNA:
Baba …its nothing…
Na so relationship be these days… pple are more shallow and superficial than ever…more interested in their phones, social media entertainment than engaging pple….
U just need small patience and also some tactics to engage women….because the truth women do very little to keep the spark alive at talking stage… na u go find common ground, initiate outings, call more, and be funny, etc…. No use money oooooooooooo, nor start what u cant sustain oooooooooo

No worry baba….u go dey alright las las

RemoteNaija:
You are ignored because you likely don't bring 'Perceived Value' to the table yet. It sounds harsh, but human beings are transactional—we respond to value. Increase your worth (socially, financially, or intellectually), and you won't have to fight for attention. You become the magnet.

Christian36:
My aunty gave me a lady contact, this lady will take like 8 hours to respond to my message, the thing just weak me. I'm sure it is a deliberate thing, why will you give someone your number when you know you are not ready for a serious relationship. I don't just understand some ladies

Christian36:
I'm not into woman things, just that I'm over due to get married. I just want a lady I will settle down with.

Host78:
this is your problem.

You've ignored women for too long forgetting that romance is a skill.

Women are not like bags that you go to the market and pick one whenever you're ready.

Learning to get girls, keep them interested and want to be with you is a skill.

Like every skill, it must be learnt. It can't be wished for or bought. You must learn it.

Unfortunately, when you're supposed to be doing that, you were doing holy holy ("I'm not into woman's things" ).

Secondly, what do you mean "you just want a woman you can settle down with"?

Again, women are not objects you pick one and that's that.

You have to learn to put in the effort, to genuinely get them to like you.

Like every other humans, they can blow hot and cold. Today they can seem interested and tomorrow they may not.

This is because like you, they are also on their radar looking for potential mates.

One thing I can tell you is that comot your mind from the settle down soon talk and actually seek to follow due process.

Pick a woman, put in the effort. First call her once a day, preferably at night (9-10pm).

Try to keep the conversation for 3-4 minutes at first. Do this 3-4 times a week and check her energy levels.

Is she trying to keep the conversation going? Or she's sounding kinda in a hurry to leave the phone?

If she's not complaining or trying to leave the phone, then increase it up to 10-20 minutes. Sometimes it's just you goofing around.

Note the things you chat about and try to put them in your conversations. Don't ask boring questions or hard ones.

Build up and actually try to make her laugh, twist her words into funny stuff.

Really build connections with her and after a week or two, invite her to your house.

If she comes, actually try to seduce her. Make sure she's aware of your romantic intentions.

She may refuse to sleep with you. Don't apologize for it. In fact, let it be like nothing happened and continue the convo.

If everything goes well in a week or two, you'll have yourself a girlfriend.

After that you can continue studying her and see if she's someone you want to settle down with.

Christian36:
Thanks alot, you did justice to this. I will put it in practice, the main problem here is that talking for long is what I know I'm not good at. I don't know how I will go about it...... I didn't take my love life serious now it is hunting me, I just don't know where to start from, how to correct this at this age I'm is now a serious obstacle to me

Christian36:
Let me start with this for those that will come to attack me, I'm not into woman things, just that I'm over due to get married. The issue now is that whenever I get a lady contact less than two weeks the lady looses interest, I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I just want a lady I will settle down with. The second to the last and the last one just lost interest within a week. I have started seeing it as a spiritual thing. I will appreciate your advice because I'm really confused now.

Mikocake:
All you need is a social circle. Forget all these things about trying to impress a lady, you’ll always bear the brunt of the relationship. You need are social circle where you can meet and interact with ladies, naturally you’ll see those that’ll pick interest in you and vice versa.
As a man that’s trying to marry, you need someone you can have authority over and who is willing to please you. When you’re the one that’s trying to please a lady in order for her to like you, you’ll not have full control of your relationship cuz it’s women that keep relationship and marriage, not the other way round. You need a woman who can’t wait to settle down with you. And while at it, be careful of pretenders cuz they can pretend alot to secure a marriage then change after some few years of marriage.

spice123:
Content of conversation is the problem here.
Retrace your steps op.
There is a particular conversation youve repeated with them ladies that is making them uncomfortable.

Christian36:
Thanks my brother, how I wish I know the right conversation that can allow us to flow. The thing is really bothering me because, I'm not becoming younger

Christian36:
My brother, I really need help I will be 41 this coming December. This pattern started since I was 35

My brother........

There's no single technique to get this girls committed to u nor chyke Dem......

One method u used in getting one......might chase others away.......

All I do is to tease Dem into relationship jokingly........

My recent teasing on one was like....."can't u see u r so blessed having me around.......as I have all it takes in unlocking the unborn twins in yo womb and making u great mum of our future kids ehn fine girl........😊😊😊

Dat alone got her confused and strictly adhere to me........ pesin wey get boyfriend Ooo couldn't help talking back to as my wife already

Jux play with words then sometimes get yo sef involved in girlish talk it interest them.......