₦airaland Forum

Good day house,

I want to drop a situation here and get some objective feedback from guys who understand the dating terrain down here.

I’m a 31-year-old guy, and I’ve been seeing a 27-year-old lady I met through a mutual friend. She has visited my apartment three times now, and the vibe when we are together is completely solid. There is clear physical attraction, extreme comfort, and high intimacy (cuddling, intense kissing, heavy pre-intimacy/touching, etc.).

However, things haven't progressed to actual sex yet. On my end, I don't believe in forcing issues, pressuring a woman, or making a guest feel uncomfortable in my space. But frankly, I don't feel convenient hosting her a fourth time just to do the same routine without making full contact. I want to ensure I'm not entering the "nice guy" box or getting friend-zoned while acting all sweet and hospitable.

She breaks communication silences to reach out and doesn't ask me for financial maintenance, so she seems genuine, but the sexual progression is just stalling.

I want to ask the elders and experienced guys on the forum:

At her age (27) and mine (31), with the green lights for pre-intimacy 100% active over three visits, what is usually responsible for this final delay?

How do you handle the final progression naturally on the next visit without looking desperate, forcing it, or letting yourself get locked into the nice guy box?

How do you differentiate a woman who just prefers a slow, respectful pace from one who lacks full sexual interest?

I want to look at this with a brutal real-world lens so I know whether to hold the line with warmth or just calmly pivot my focus elsewhere.

Let me know your thoughts, house.

Are you a simp. Based on what I read, you've been kissing, smooching and if I read you well, fingering, abeg wetin remain other than to pull out your ?? and insert. Stop disturbing our peace with make up story. Case of mom serving a pikin food and the pikin dey ask mama if to eat it or not

I'm just wondering why 'penetrative sex' seems like the end-goal...

There is more to companionship than that.


#MyOpinion

notobiafrababe:
Are you a simp. Based on what I read, you've been kissing, smooching and if I read you well, fingering, abeg wetin remain other than to pull out your ?? and insert. Stop disturbing our peace with make up story. Case of mom serving a pikin food and the pikin dey ask mama if to eat it or not

but she dey stop me naa,this is not a cook up story

She breaks communication silences to reach out and doesn't ask me for financial maintenance, so she seems genuine, but the sexual progression is just stalling.

I pity you.


Accept my sympathy in advance.

Zonefree:
I pity you.


Accept my sympathy in advance.

how bro? na why i run to elders here

heartbraker:
but she dey stop me naa,this is not a cook up story

Stop inviting her to come over. Some aggressive drivers are driving the car you're washing every day.


Learn not to wash a car you're not driving.

Zonefree:
Stop inviting her to come over. Some aggressive drivers are driving the car you're washing every day.

beause i want to invite her over again, how do i now Bleep or i just discard her? i have spent only 3k entirely though ,i have no investment

heartbraker:
beause i want to invite her over again, how do i now Bleep or i just discard her? i have spent only 3k entirely though ,i have no investment

Talk to her about it when you start kissing for a while...

The thing is when you are in that moment with a woman...dead all shyness....its a shame to be shy at that spot....you are allowed to touch her in places ...arouse her and all...

Be a man bro...you are the reason why you are not having it yet...you dey wait for her?

Na you go run am...touch her there...talk to her in her ears ....she will be forced to speak out if she is ready for it or not...

You don already dey dull her bro

The last time you asked, everybody gave opinions and ideas. By the third page, you claimed Nairaland members wasted your time by posting graffiti. What are you expecting to read this time?

heartbraker:
Good day house,

I want to drop a situation here and get some objective feedback from guys who understand the dating terrain down here.

I’m a 31-year-old guy, and I’ve been seeing a 27-year-old lady I met through a mutual friend. She has visited my apartment three times now, and the vibe when we are together is completely solid. There is clear physical attraction, extreme comfort, and high intimacy (cuddling, intense kissing, heavy pre-intimacy/touching, etc.).

However, things haven't progressed to actual sex yet. On my end, I don't believe in forcing issues, pressuring a woman, or making a guest feel uncomfortable in my space. But frankly, I don't feel convenient hosting her a fourth time just to do the same routine without making full contact. I want to ensure I'm not entering the "nice guy" box or getting friend-zoned while acting all sweet and hospitable.

She breaks communication silences to reach out and doesn't ask me for financial maintenance, so she seems genuine, but the sexual progression is just stalling.

I want to ask the elders and experienced guys on the forum:

At her age (27) and mine (31), with the green lights for pre-intimacy 100% active over three visits, what is usually responsible for this final delay?

How do you handle the final progression naturally on the next visit without looking desperate, forcing it, or letting yourself get locked into the nice guy box?

How do you differentiate a woman who just prefers a slow, respectful pace from one who lacks full sexual interest?

I want to look at this with a brutal real-world lens so I know whether to hold the line with warmth or just calmly pivot my focus elsewhere.

Let me know your thoughts, house.

You're in too much of a hurry

Zonefree:
Stop inviting her to come over. Some aggressive drivers are driving the car you're washing every day.


Learn not to wash a car you're not driving.

This man

No 1 thing tell her straightup you want to beep,
No go dea watch banana make another man chop am for you.

Plus sha hold rubber oo

heartbraker:
beause i want to invite her over again, how do i now Bleep or i just discard her? i have spent only 3k entirely though ,i have no investment

A 31 year old brought relationship issue to NL filled with secondary school students and you expect mature responses? Dey play.

Or maybe she's even treating infection
Man there is nothing between 2 opposite sex other than sexual attraction.
Accept it, men want a woman not because she's intelligent or bright; you want her primarily for sexual compatability.

If that isn't happening and she's not a sexually inexperienced person, man move on to the next. No let any girl act an angel when she's obviously not.

heartbraker:
Good day house,

I want to drop a situation here and get some objective feedback from guys who understand the dating terrain down here.

I’m a 31-year-old guy, and I’ve been seeing a 27-year-old lady I met through a mutual friend. She has visited my apartment three times now, and the vibe when we are together is completely solid. There is clear physical attraction, extreme comfort, and high intimacy (cuddling, intense kissing, heavy pre-intimacy/touching, etc.).

However, things haven't progressed to actual sex yet. On my end, I don't believe in forcing issues, pressuring a woman, or making a guest feel uncomfortable in my space. But frankly, I don't feel convenient hosting her a fourth time just to do the same routine without making full contact. I want to ensure I'm not entering the "nice guy" box or getting friend-zoned while acting all sweet and hospitable.

She breaks communication silences to reach out and doesn't ask me for financial maintenance, so she seems genuine, but the sexual progression is just stalling.

I want to ask the elders and experienced guys on the forum:

At her age (27) and mine (31), with the green lights for pre-intimacy 100% active over three visits, what is usually responsible for this final delay?

How do you handle the final progression naturally on the next visit without looking desperate, forcing it, or letting yourself get locked into the nice guy box?

How do you differentiate a woman who just prefers a slow, respectful pace from one who lacks full sexual interest?

I want to look at this with a brutal real-world lens so I know whether to hold the line with warmth or just calmly pivot my focus elsewhere.

Let me know your thoughts, house.

marry her first

As a guy man I will advice you to not to do anything to her yet.just bring her to me let me show you the next steps to take.

You deep kiss and all, you no knack, hmmm,,, bro you ain't aright,,for 3 consecutive times, nna ehh, which kind cock and bull story be this

Ikennaford:
You deep kiss and all, you no knack, hmmm,,, bro you ain't aright,,for 3 consecutive times, nna ehh, which kind cock and bull story be this

I swear bro

☆Stuff like that actually happen, people do pre-intimacy without sex.

Ikennaford:
You deep kiss and all, you no knack, hmmm,,, bro you ain't aright,,for 3 consecutive times, nna ehh, which kind cock and bull story be this

Go and focus on personal goals. Leave woman alone

You sound like someone who's not very financially okay.
And, you seem scared because you feel if you push harder you'll lose her, and you're not sure when next you'll be lucky to have another woman in your life.

Everything still stems from the fact that you're not okay financially, else, I don't think this will be your problem.
Try hustle more, and get more women in your life.

Next time before she comes, tell her you'll like to have sex with her, then see her reaction.

While you're here asking useless questions, some other guys are there rough handling the woman you're scared to have sex with.
All these guys with low self esteem self.

heartbraker:
Good day house,

I want to drop a situation here and get some objective feedback from guys who understand the dating terrain down here.

I’m a 31-year-old guy, and I’ve been seeing a 27-year-old lady I met through a mutual friend. She has visited my apartment three times now, and the vibe when we are together is completely solid. There is clear physical attraction, extreme comfort, and high intimacy (cuddling, intense kissing, heavy pre-intimacy/touching, etc.).

However, things haven't progressed to actual sex yet. On my end, I don't believe in forcing issues, pressuring a woman, or making a guest feel uncomfortable in my space. But frankly, I don't feel convenient hosting her a fourth time just to do the same routine without making full contact. I want to ensure I'm not entering the "nice guy" box or getting friend-zoned while acting all sweet and hospitable.

She breaks communication silences to reach out and doesn't ask me for financial maintenance, so she seems genuine, but the sexual progression is just stalling.

I want to ask the elders and experienced guys on the forum:

At her age (27) and mine (31), with the green lights for pre-intimacy 100% active over three visits, what is usually responsible for this final delay?

How do you handle the final progression naturally on the next visit without looking desperate, forcing it, or letting yourself get locked into the nice guy box?

How do you differentiate a woman who just prefers a slow, respectful pace from one who lacks full sexual interest?

I want to look at this with a brutal real-world lens so I know whether to hold the line with warmth or just calmly pivot my focus elsewhere.

Let me know your thoughts, house.

Have you guys discussed about sex before and is she enjoy sex and how she want it ?
Answer me and I will tell you want to do .

heartbraker:
but she dey stop me naa,this is not a cook up story

na when she go carry pregnancy come dump for your head you go explain taya because people are seeing her come to your house and they noticed all the long periods you both are indoors.

Just kwantinue

heartbraker:
but she dey stop me naa,this is not a cook up story

She dey stop you and she has stopped you 3 times. Don't you feel used? Don't you feel like a sponge?

Abeg Who made her the gateman of sex?
Why can't you say NO and stop her too? Treat her like a child & Let her simply sit down, watch TV and go. But you can't because you are afraid of her and don't want to lose her.

TELL HER NO too. STOP HER TOO. Do it to her and watch how she reacts under your control. CAN SHE TAKE IT? will she ask that yeye question of WHY WOULDN'T YOU LET ME KISS YOU? ARE YOU ANGRY?

instead you allow her and your best move is to come here and turn to a journalist on Nairaland.

and Yes! you are a simp.

Maybe she day wait make the hole way don wide close back

Please give her time 😂😂😂

chinex11:
No 1 thing tell her straightup you want to beep,
No go dea watch banana make another man chop am for you.

Plus sha hold rubber oo

Very valid points.

@Op: Tell her and know your fate. If her reasons are excusable, challenge them. And if it's a deal breaker for you, tell her as well or wait till she's ready.

Some girls may stop you due to their conscience of recent exposure to pregnancy or illness which they are still working on. You dey there dey rush. She will soon give you access now and tell you she's positive. Na then your eye go clear

You want to release inside her and get her pregnant abi?

notobiafrababe:
Are you a simp. Based on what I read, you've been kissing, smooching and if I read you well, fingering, abeg wetin remain other than to pull out your ?? and insert. Stop disturbing our peace with make up story. Case of mom serving a pikin food and the pikin dey ask mama if to eat it or not

it shall be well with you with this response

A lady visited you 3 times and you're watching her like a television set?

Two trials. Have you finally found the right advice?

heartbraker:
Good day house,

I want to drop a situation here and get some objective feedback from guys who understand the dating terrain down here.

I’m a 31-year-old guy, and I’ve been seeing a 27-year-old lady I met through a mutual friend. She has visited my apartment three times now, and the vibe when we are together is completely solid. There is clear physical attraction, extreme comfort, and high intimacy (cuddling, intense kissing, heavy pre-intimacy/touching, etc.).

However, things haven't progressed to actual sex yet. On my end, I don't believe in forcing issues, pressuring a woman, or making a guest feel uncomfortable in my space. But frankly, I don't feel convenient hosting her a fourth time just to do the same routine without making full contact. I want to ensure I'm not entering the "nice guy" box or getting friend-zoned while acting all sweet and hospitable.

She breaks communication silences to reach out and doesn't ask me for financial maintenance, so she seems genuine, but the sexual progression is just stalling.

I want to ask the elders and experienced guys on the forum:

At her age (27) and mine (31), with the green lights for pre-intimacy 100% active over three visits, what is usually responsible for this final delay?

How do you handle the final progression naturally on the next visit without looking desperate, forcing it, or letting yourself get locked into the nice guy box?

How do you differentiate a woman who just prefers a slow, respectful pace from one who lacks full sexual interest?

I want to look at this with a brutal real-world lens so I know whether to hold the line with warmth or just calmly pivot my focus elsewhere.

Let me know your thoughts, house.