Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them - Romance - Nairaland
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| Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Kalatium(op): 7:26am On Jul 07 |
One of the biggest mistakes people make before marriage is falling in love with a person's potential instead of accepting their present reality. If someone smokes, drinks heavily, gambles, spends recklessly or has a lifestyle you genuinely dislike, ask yourself one simple question: If this person never changes, can I still happily spend the rest of my life with them? If the answer is no, then walk away. Do not enter the relationship hoping marriage will magically transform them into the person you want. Many relationships become stressful because one partner spends years trying to "fix" the other. What started as love gradually becomes constant criticism, arguments and disappointment. This does not mean couples should never encourage each other to become better. Healthy relationships inspire growth. A loving partner can encourage healthier habits, better financial decisions or personal development. The difference is that encouragement respects a person's freedom, while control tries to force change. Real change is most effective when it comes from personal conviction, not pressure. Before saying "I do," pay close attention to the habits and values you see today. Marry the person they are now, not the version you have created in your imagination. Many people assume marriage changes people. In reality, marriage often magnifies who people already are. Choose wisely. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Amovingman: 9:10am On Jul 07 |
Why don't you use your kalulu moniker to post it Kalatium: |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Kalatium(op): 9:36am On Jul 07 |
Amovingman:What do you mean by kalulu moniker. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by OlaOfLagos(m): 9:42am On Jul 07 |
Marrying or Dating someone hoping to change them in the future is a dangerous gamble. People only change when they choose to, not because of pressure. If you can't be content with who they are right now for the next 10-20 years, they aren't the right match. Don’t take the RISK, you won’t like the outcome. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by 9japride(m): 2:18pm On Jul 07 |
OlaOfLagos:[color=#006600][/color] Adult don't change, they only pretend to change. A lot of people make such mistake. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Lalami3232(m): 3:12pm On Jul 07 |
![]() This is what I've been saying all-day. You married a non-virgin (a woman who doesn't have sexual discipline, someone who has opened legs for several men) and you expect her to be faithful. Why you think say na your preeq sweet her from the list of preeqs wey she dey collect? Now let me ask you, a woman who couldn't close her legs for other men, why you think say go be good role model for your daughters? Anyways, adults don't change, they only adjust What do I even know sef aside enlightening my fellow men nationwide with the good news of DNA test |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Sonnobax15(m): 6:18pm On Jul 07 |
![]() People don't change overnight. You see that the same bad character that your partner has been hiding during the relationship,he/she will eventually unveil them in marriage. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by 9jajoseph: 6:20pm On Jul 07 |
Indeed, never Marry someone with early red flags, hoping they would change all in the name of LOVE Once a cheat is always a cheat. This time they would be careful not to be caught so easily like they their caught the last time Writing from experience |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by WatchYourSix: 6:21pm On Jul 07 |
Lalami3232:I know say Lamina must deliver for this thread
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| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by legendarystar: 6:22pm On Jul 07 |
That’s a very very wrong move to make, the consequences of this careless decision can destroy you mentally, physically and emotionally beyond repair |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by MrSword: 6:22pm On Jul 07 |
Anything you are seeing in relationship...once you enter marriage...it will be promax. Those that cheat in relationships...will cheat more in marriage. Those that beat their partners...will do worst in marriage. Marriage doesn't change anybody...it only reveal the true color of that person. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Hezmatosky210: 6:24pm On Jul 07 |
Marriage be like shell. Until you break it, before you see wetin dey inside. Just marry, anything wey you see na your God give you. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by QuinQ: 6:28pm On Jul 07 |
Kalatium:Either way, you'll still marry the wrong person ' according to this guy below
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| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by DuttyChuks: 6:56pm On Jul 07 |
If you do, your eyes will see your ears! |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Reverseng: 6:57pm On Jul 07 |
Yes. Accept people for who they are and who they're not. Goats eats grass. If you give them meat and they refuse it, it doesn't mean your meat has spoilt or the goat is disrespectful or being ungrateful to your providence. It just means that goats are living true to their nature: grass lover https://www.nairaland.com/8661877/build-dream-woman-heres-some https://www.nairaland.com/8656859/pain-feel-lives-effortless-effort |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by SmartMaster001: 6:57pm On Jul 07 |
What a sound advice. Let the wise listens. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by faceland: 6:58pm On Jul 07 |
Any prostitute around the age of 35 know about 12 men in her lifetime that attempted to domesticate them... They found out that trouble/stress is better than a boring normal life due to their personality. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by adebowales: 7:01pm On Jul 07 |
I am regretting at the moment, I wish I could correct my mistake but it’s too late |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Hhh4444: 7:06pm On Jul 07 |
Better run now,it will only get worse the longer you stay. adebowales: |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Hhh4444: 7:08pm On Jul 07 |
The idea of marriage is flawed. Humans are too complicated to make marriage work. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Xpol: 7:13pm On Jul 07*. Modified: 7:28pm On Jul 07 |
This is one of the commonest reasons marriages crash. Believing you can change fully grown adults or believing they will change all because of love? Sometimes you see a temporary change but trust me it won't last, most times that temporary change is just a pretence. Marry only when you both know you can manage each other flaws,bad sides, etc coz no one is perfect, else remain single for the sake of your peace of mind. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by pathtech: 7:14pm On Jul 07 |
What was the mistake sir |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by pathtech: 7:14pm On Jul 07 |
adebowales:What was the mistake sir |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by PheelzAlmighty: 7:26pm On Jul 07 |
Ndi Unchangeable changers |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by PHIPEX(m): 7:27pm On Jul 07 |
People can hibernate their character after marriage but a little pressure or bliss will make them reactivate the hibernating character. Bad people don't become good after marriage |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Auki: 7:30pm On Jul 07 |
Absolutely correct 👍. Good advice. Also don't marry a person with anger. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by kaywhy09(m): 7:31pm On Jul 07 |
Stop marrying with intentions of changing anyone |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by NaijaNaWaa: 7:31pm On Jul 07 |
Kalatium:If before marriage you spot a habit that you can't stand, then FLEE immediately. For example, if like me you can't tolerate seeing a lady's dirty underwear, then don't proceed with the marriage if your fiancee is in the habit of not washing her underwears immediately after wearing them. She'll turn your house into a waste bin of smelly dross and ragged bras after marriage; and you'll be perpetually miserable living with her and her dirty habit. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Smartguyboy(m): 7:34pm On Jul 07 |
Sonnobax15:100% People don’t change they only improve . |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by kingthreat(m): 7:57pm On Jul 07 |
It's so hard to change yourself, not to talk of changing another human being. |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by Dilaminu: 7:59pm On Jul 07 |
Kalatium:Marring some one hopping to change him in the feature is dangerous. An Adult don't change, they only pretend to change. A lot of people make such mistake.you can’t fix that mistake ever💔 try to get one that you can stay with in any situation . |
| Re: Don't Marry Someone Hoping You Will Change Them by judewrites: 8:30pm On Jul 07 |
Sonnobax15:Sure, some people are chameleons in nature. That's why it's good to be divinely led to marry someone, because some are experts at hiding their bad characters! No one is 100% perfect though. |
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