₦airaland Forum

Mine is less than two years o, all thanks to God Almighty

Chydon888:
Good morning Amarachi. Please, can we connect? I'm interested in you.

Okie

Chydon888:
Good morning Amarachi. Please, can we connect? I'm interested in you.

Okie drop your mail

lindqvistbergst:
Remember. This is a country where marital rape is legal. And Nigerian men take advantage of that in the millions everyday. Saying things like....."its my right" before doing the dastardly deed. And its mostly those men harping on about marriage here.

I'm not saying that it is right, my question for you is that why will a lady deprived her husband that carrys the family responsibles sex apart from health issues, is that not also crime

We dated for almost 12 years before eventually getting married officially.....

.

Amarachibaby:
Okie drop your mail

Chydon888:
chidonwa888@gmail.com

Done

3 months. And my wedding day was the third time we would be meeting face to face

nnamdi640:
I'm not saying that it is right, my question for you is that why will a lady deprived her husband that carrys the family responsibles sex apart from health issues, is that not also crime

Why would you argue that you have a right over another humans body at all! I live in Nigeria. I have only ever dated African women. And we both know for a fact that Nigerian women take sex seriously in a relationship!! They do not deprive you any if they genuinely want to be in that relationship or marriage so when they do it is for a reason. They are human and have the right to say no under any circumstances. Its in the constitution and that makes any right you think you have void. You are her partner not her owner and that's my exact point. You pay the fees to assume ownership its not about tradition because you are not traditional.

You are mistaking culture and law. The constitution actually voids the marital rape laws making it illegal but enforcement and legal literacy are the issue. When anything conflicts with a higher legal system. The highest system wins.

nnamdi640:
I'm not saying that it is right, my question for you is that why will a lady deprived her husband that carrys the family responsibles sex apart from health issues, is that not also crime

We both know for a fact if you treat these queens correctly they treat you like moses.

When your rod of god rises their legs part like the red sea. Just admit you rather take by force and manipulation over making the slightest bit of effort. And thats actually sad, all it takes is one night a month about her. A date night and not much more.

nnamdi640:
I'm not saying that it is right, my question for you is that why will a lady deprived her husband that carrys the family responsibles sex apart from health issues, is that not also crime

Hello!! Norwegian/brit here. You will never convince me that "no" is a crime.

lindqvistbergst:
Why would you argue that you have a right over another humans body at all! I live in Nigeria. I have only ever dated African women. And we both know for a fact that Nigerian women take sex seriously in a relationship!! They do not deprive you any if they genuinely want to be in that relationship or marriage so when they do it is for a reason. They are human and have the right to say no under any circumstances. Its in the constitution and that makes any right you think you have void. You are her partner not her owner and that's my exact point. You pay the fees to assume ownership its not about tradition because you are not traditional.

You are mistaking culture and law. The constitution actually voids the marital rape laws making it illegal but enforcement and legal literacy are the issue. When anything conflicts with a higher legal system. The highest system wins.

I'm not arguing that with you, it is the right of the person involve because it is her body, all I'm saying is that it is wrong if such is used negatively. Sex deprivation might not be in the law that govern the land, but it is totally wrong for a woman to weaponized sex deprivation just to punish her husband. Both in culture and religion it is totally wrong....... There are certain situations that can warrant such just like health issues and some cases but deliberately weaponizing just to control the man or for her to have their way is wrong

nnamdi640:
I'm not arguing that with you, it is the right of the person involve because it is her body, all I'm saying is that it is wrong if such is used negatively. Sex deprivation might not be in the law that govern the land, but it is totally wrong for a woman to weaponized sex deprivation just to punish her husband. Both in culture and religion it is totally wrong....... There are certain situations that can warrant such just like health issues and some cases but deliberately weaponizing just to control the man or for her to have their way is wrong

Well, actually it is law. In the sense it can be used as grounds for divorce under neglect so you can move the feck on. And if shes using it as a weapon that means you married the wrong woman its that simple.

You cannot morally or legally force her to have sex and she cannot force you to stay in a sexless marriage. Please grow up and stop making excuses for adults to justify abusing each other. If you choose to stay thats your fault.

Dated for less than a year, 12 years, 3 kids and it still feels brand new

Check your mail please

Amarachibaby:
Done

geelite:
I just turned 34, and I've never been married. I'm still single and don't have a girlfriend.
My last relationship ended in 2022 after I told my girlfriend that I wanted to return to university to study Information Technology, even though I already had a degree in Chemistry. At the time, I was 30 years old.
I made that decision because I wanted to build a career that would give me better opportunities abroad. My goal is to relocate to the UK, study for a master's degree in Cybersecurity, and pursue a career in a field that is in high demand.
Looking back today, I'm grateful I made that choice. I have no regrets because I'll be graduating this December, and I'm one step closer to achieving my dream.
Since that relationship ended, I haven't been in another one. Sometimes it feels as though people judge me by my current financial situation without knowing the plans I'm working towards or the sacrifices I'm making to invest in my future.
Life doesn't always reward instant results. Sometimes, you have to make difficult decisions today so you can enjoy a better tomorrow. I'm choosing to stay focused on my goals, trusting that everything else will fall into place at the right time. The worse part is that the lady hasn't married till date🙄

but what if God is planning something better for you. What if you dodged a bullet

You are right

whippersnapper:
but what if God is planning something better for you. What if you dodged a bullet

valuedammy:
Mine is 4years of dating and now 14yrs of marriage

You mean 4 years of serious nacking called dating, and 14 years of gentle nacking called marriage

That means she only finished secondary school when you married her.
Are you the one to sponsor her university stuff too? Or she won't go to tertiary institution?

uncleck:
I didn't date her. The first day I took her out was the day I told her I'd marry her. I've been noticing her for sometime. She was still doing apprenticeship. I was giving her time to mature. One day I met her and got her contact. I didn't call for several months. The day I finally called her was to invite her for a date. After some back and forth we settled for a date and venue. That was around January. I would have married her by April if not for my dad's burial by that April. The road to their village was bad so I fixed our trad by November.

It's still the best decision I made. She is 90% of what I wanted in a woman

What do you guys produce in the factory. Is it nylon, bags?

Chiuzk:
This, may be a little bit lengthy.
We knew it was time for marriage when hubby got a job after nysc. I was already serving, combined with my little catering services then (we started the relationship in higher institution).
But, it wasn't easy ooo, because a year after the wedding, he lost his job. We had only one child then. Then we switched to family planning, and I was the only one working in one of the leading networks. Hubby had no job for about 6 years, and with God's grace, I took care of him, our child, and the home. Chai! It wasn't easy ooo, but thank God I took that decision to stand by him. Though with my company's HMO on health, it was easier. My family given me support sometimes too helped as well, and I kept hope alive.
Later, hubby got a little job almost like a security in another network provider, because he was tired staying at home, and jobs were not coming. This was after 6 years of no work. From that almost (security like) work, the company took him in as their staff when the management discovered he was a graduate. Now, he earns better, and the work had took him round in and out of the country. I, later got another work in the bank, and when I got tired, I resigned and we set up a factory. Doing the business that I have ever dreamt to have. We have two girls now, and oga pampers me a lot, that even the very first car he bought was bought in my name and given to me. Lol 😆...I knew he is doing all these because I stayed, and I am grateful to God I did. If not, another woman would have been enjoying now with him. I am really and will forever be grateful to God because looking at how things were then, to compare now, believe you me, it can only be God. Did you know I even sold okirika at oil mill Port Harcourt? In short, I backed my baby on my back, carried bell and was running after vehicles to sell okirika clothes #50 #50. Just for us to eat. Even as a graduate. Well, that is a story for another day. Let me no cry, ( though, my tears of joy now).

You met your wife when she was still in secondary school?

And later you paid for her university fees?

Olaola26:
That 9 years was during days she was still In secondary school, university and when she started working then( Friendship and courtship, seeing her potential has a partner and a responsible wife

Love800:
You met your wife when she was still in secondary school?

And later you paid for her university fees?

That sounds dodgy as heck. How old was he and how old was she? Does Nigeria have any kind of romeo and juliet laws (high school sweetheart laws) that i did know about? Seriously...this brings up to many questions and red flags. Im NOT making any accusations BUT sounds a tad groomy.

2 months

Love800:
You met your wife when she was still in secondary school?

And later you paid for her university fees?

it's genuinely dodgy on the facts as posted, not just a creepy feeling "Friendship and courtship" starting while she was still in secondary school, him later paying her university fees, then marrying her, that's a documented pattern of a much older man effectively grooming and financially bonding a girl from childhood into a dependent adult relationship where she's never had a life stage outside his influence and financial control. The power imbalance isn't incidental, it's baked into the entire timeline from the start.

Love800:
What do you guys produce in the factory. Is it nylon, bags?

We produce treated water. Sachet water for now. Tomorrow 5th August, is our one year anniversary/thanksgiving the sachet water company was opened.

Cubeman:
You mean 4 years of serious nacking called dating, and 14 years of gentle nacking called marriage

Yes, what other thing do you want to hear ?

Love800:
You met your wife when she was still in secondary school?

And later you paid for her university fees?

Nop I do not pay for her education her guidance did, they even secure her job after her education.

Mine is to give her love and support

Funny enough we both live in different states during this period.

Love800:
That means she only finished secondary school when you married her.
Are you the one to sponsor her university stuff too? Or she won't go to tertiary institution?

I'm setting up serious business that she'll manage under my strict supervision. University degree cannot be passed on to the next generation

Olaola26:
Nop I do not pay for her education her guidance did, they even secure her job after her education.

Mine is to give her love and support

Funny enough we both live in different states during this period.

Funny how the narrative suddenly changed once someone pointed out the groominess of it. An instant back pedal. And immediately different states.

7 complete years

lindqvistbergst:
Funny how the narrative suddenly changed once someone pointed out the groominess of it. An instant back pedal. And immediately different states.

It doesn’t change anything

Sorry if you can’t comprehend

Olaola26:
It doesn’t change anything

Sorry if you can’t comprehend

Yep. It does.....but Nigeria is a lsnd of local ped......

Ill let you finish the sentence