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Many men spend a lot of time looking for beauty, attraction, intelligence, financial compatibility, sexual chemistry and other qualities when choosing a wife. Those things matter, but there is one quality that I think deserves far more attention: kindness.

Marry a woman who is genuinely kind to you, not only when everything is going well, but especially when life becomes difficult. There will be seasons when you are broke, sick, exhausted, unemployed, confused, emotionally drained or dealing with responsibilities that you cannot explain to everyone. During those moments, you will discover the difference between someone who simply loves you when life is comfortable and someone who genuinely cares about your wellbeing.

A kind partner does not always wait until you are completely broken before offering help. She notices when something is wrong. She sees that you are struggling and asks what she can do. Sometimes she may not have much to offer, but she still tries to make things a little easier.

Marriage should not feel like a courtroom where every act of kindness requires an application.

“You didn't ask me.”
“You didn't tell me.”
“Is it my problem?”

Technically, a person can make these arguments, but marriage should involve enough empathy to recognise that the person beside you may sometimes need help before they know how to ask for it.

There is also a major difference between having boundaries and deliberately watching your spouse struggle just to prove a point. If your husband is going through a difficult financial period and you have the capacity to help, helping him should not become a battle of pride. If your wife is overwhelmed with responsibilities and you can take something off her plate, you should not need a formal request before doing it.

Kindness does not mean allowing yourself to be exploited. It means genuinely wanting the person you married to be okay.

Another quality men should pay attention to is discretion.

Marry someone who understands that not everything that happens inside a marriage belongs on social media.

Your spouse will eventually become vulnerable around you. You will see their failures, embarrassing moments, financial problems, family issues, insecurities and weaknesses. There will be disagreements that neither of you will handle perfectly.

Some of those things should remain private.

There is a difference between seeking help because you are experiencing abuse or dealing with a serious marital problem and deliberately turning your spouse's private struggles into entertainment for strangers.

Be very careful about marrying someone who cannot keep anything private. Today, it may be a disagreement about money. Tomorrow, it may be an argument you had at home.

Eventually, your most vulnerable moment could become a WhatsApp status, Facebook post or gossip among people who have never met you.

You need a partner who can still protect your dignity even when she is angry with you.

The same principle applies to men. Women should also look for husbands who are kind, empathetic and discreet. Marriage cannot survive on one person's kindness while the other person constantly takes advantage of it.

Beauty will eventually become familiar. Money can disappear. Attraction can fluctuate. Careers can change. Circumstances can become completely different from what you expected when you first met.

Character becomes much more important when the excitement fades and real life begins.

When you lose your job, become sick, experience financial difficulties or simply go through a season when you are not at your best, you will discover what kind of person you actually married.

You don't want someone who watches you struggle simply because you did not ask. You want someone who notices. You want someone who cares. You want someone who can say, “I can see that you are struggling. Let me help.”

Most importantly, you want someone who can help you without later using your vulnerable moment as ammunition against you.

When choosing a spouse, look beyond the person who makes your heart beat faster.

Pay attention to the person who makes you feel safe when life becomes difficult. Marry kindness. Marry empathy. Marry discretion. Marry character.

Those qualities become priceless when the beautiful and exciting parts of marriage meet real life.

Dpsychologist:
Many men spend a lot of time looking for beauty, attraction, intelligence, financial compatibility, sexual chemistry and other qualities when choosing a wife. Those things matter, but there is one quality that I think deserves far more attention: kindness.

Marry a woman who is genuinely kind to you, not only when everything is going well, but especially when life becomes difficult. There will be seasons when you are broke, sick, exhausted, unemployed, confused, emotionally drained or dealing with responsibilities that you cannot explain to everyone. During those moments, you will discover the difference between someone who simply loves you when life is comfortable and someone who genuinely cares about your wellbeing.

A kind partner does not always wait until you are completely broken before offering help. She notices when something is wrong. She sees that you are struggling and asks what she can do. Sometimes she may not have much to offer, but she still tries to make things a little easier.

Marriage should not feel like a courtroom where every act of kindness requires an application.

“You didn't ask me.”
“You didn't tell me.”
“Is it my problem?”

Technically, a person can make these arguments, but marriage should involve enough empathy to recognise that the person beside you may sometimes need help before they know how to ask for it.

There is also a major difference between having boundaries and deliberately watching your spouse struggle just to prove a point. If your husband is going through a difficult financial period and you have the capacity to help, helping him should not become a battle of pride. If your wife is overwhelmed with responsibilities and you can take something off her plate, you should not need a formal request before doing it.

Kindness does not mean allowing yourself to be exploited. It means genuinely wanting the person you married to be okay.

Another quality men should pay attention to is discretion.

Marry someone who understands that not everything that happens inside a marriage belongs on social media.

Your spouse will eventually become vulnerable around you. You will see their failures, embarrassing moments, financial problems, family issues, insecurities and weaknesses. There will be disagreements that neither of you will handle perfectly.

Some of those things should remain private.

There is a difference between seeking help because you are experiencing abuse or dealing with a serious marital problem and deliberately turning your spouse's private struggles into entertainment for strangers.

Be very careful about marrying someone who cannot keep anything private. Today, it may be a disagreement about money. Tomorrow, it may be an argument you had at home.

Eventually, your most vulnerable moment could become a WhatsApp status, Facebook post or gossip among people who have never met you.

You need a partner who can still protect your dignity even when she is angry with you.

The same principle applies to men. Women should also look for husbands who are kind, empathetic and discreet. Marriage cannot survive on one person's kindness while the other person constantly takes advantage of it.

Beauty will eventually become familiar. Money can disappear. Attraction can fluctuate. Careers can change. Circumstances can become completely different from what you expected when you first met.

Character becomes much more important when the excitement fades and real life begins.

When you lose your job, become sick, experience financial difficulties or simply go through a season when you are not at your best, you will discover what kind of person you actually married.

You don't want someone who watches you struggle simply because you did not ask. You want someone who notices. You want someone who cares. You want someone who can say, “I can see that you are struggling. Let me help.”

Most importantly, you want someone who can help you without later using your vulnerable moment as ammunition against you.

When choosing a spouse, look beyond the person who makes your heart beat faster.

Pay attention to the person who makes you feel safe when life becomes difficult. Marry kindness. Marry empathy. Marry discretion. Marry character.

Those qualities become priceless when the beautiful and exciting parts of marriage meet real life.

Cc nlfpmod seun Dominique farano

did Jesus Christ marry when he’s alive

Bayoonanuga:
did Jesus Christ marry when he’s alive

So tell me, are you Jesus christ?

Kindness matters a lot, if you marry an unkind person, lol you're in for a long run.

Btw, kindness is part of the traits you give out to a potential partner.

When you're kind to your partner, you see him doing way more out of his comfort zone just to make you happy and safe. But when you're not kind, you're seen as a burden that needs to be put on hold or discarded.

Loud it for everyone at the back!
The main reason marriages are crashing daily is simple: we constantly focus on the wrong things. People are busy marrying Instagram packaging, vibes, and heavy pockets, completely ignoring character.
Open your eyes when searching! Before you say "I do," check their anger management, financial discipline, emotional maturity, and discretion.
It is only when you are completely helpless that you truly understand the value of a kind, selfless partner.True love protects, it doesn't expose.
Glory be to God!

That was one of the main Reasons I married my Wife,She was and still a very Kind Person.If you marry an unkind woman you will know that Six is different from half a Dozen,She will tell u that Bend in corner is different from Round about.Marry a woman that has a good heart and enjoy ur marriage.

Beautiful write up ❤️ ❤️..In addition, never marry all these women dancing on tiktok with no foresight

Above all dont overlook her family...

This is one of the most profound pieces of marital advice ever posted on this forum. Beauty fades, and financial fortunes can change overnight, but genuine kindness and discretion are the ultimate pillars of a lasting marriage. In a tough economy like ours, financial strain is inevitable. Marrying a partner who possesses the empathy to help cushion life's heavy blows—without using your low moments as emotional ammunition—is a priceless blessing. Character truly is everything when the initial excitement of marriage meets the raw reality of life.

marlow1962:
Kindness matters a lot, if you marry an unkind person, lol you're in for a long run.

Btw, kindness is part of the traits you give out to a potential partner.

When you're kind to your partner, you see him doing way more out of his comfort zone just to make you happy and safe. But when you're not kind, you're seen as a burden that needs to be put on hold or discarded.

Lies and total bullshit. There are some people that if you like severe your head for them, they won't still be kind to you. A wicked soul is a wicked soul no matter what. It is in their blood. E be like you are still a kid sef

Dpsychologist:
Many men spend a lot of time looking for beauty, attraction, intelligence, financial compatibility, sexual chemistry and other qualities when choosing a wife. Those things matter, but there is one quality that I think deserves far more attention: kindness.

Marry a woman who is genuinely kind to you, not only when everything is going well, but especially when life becomes difficult. There will be seasons when you are broke, sick, exhausted, unemployed, confused, emotionally drained or dealing with responsibilities that you cannot explain to everyone. During those moments, you will discover the difference between someone who simply loves you when life is comfortable and someone who genuinely cares about your wellbeing.

A kind partner does not always wait until you are completely broken before offering help. She notices when something is wrong. She sees that you are struggling and asks what she can do. Sometimes she may not have much to offer, but she still tries to make things a little easier.

Marriage should not feel like a courtroom where every act of kindness requires an application.

“You didn't ask me.”
“You didn't tell me.”
“Is it my problem?”

Technically, a person can make these arguments, but marriage should involve enough empathy to recognise that the person beside you may sometimes need help before they know how to ask for it.

There is also a major difference between having boundaries and deliberately watching your spouse struggle just to prove a point. If your husband is going through a difficult financial period and you have the capacity to help, helping him should not become a battle of pride. If your wife is overwhelmed with responsibilities and you can take something off her plate, you should not need a formal request before doing it.

Kindness does not mean allowing yourself to be exploited. It means genuinely wanting the person you married to be okay.

Another quality men should pay attention to is discretion.

Marry someone who understands that not everything that happens inside a marriage belongs on social media.

Your spouse will eventually become vulnerable around you. You will see their failures, embarrassing moments, financial problems, family issues, insecurities and weaknesses. There will be disagreements that neither of you will handle perfectly.

Some of those things should remain private.

There is a difference between seeking help because you are experiencing abuse or dealing with a serious marital problem and deliberately turning your spouse's private struggles into entertainment for strangers.

Be very careful about marrying someone who cannot keep anything private. Today, it may be a disagreement about money. Tomorrow, it may be an argument you had at home.

Eventually, your most vulnerable moment could become a WhatsApp status, Facebook post or gossip among people who have never met you.

You need a partner who can still protect your dignity even when she is angry with you.

The same principle applies to men. Women should also look for husbands who are kind, empathetic and discreet. Marriage cannot survive on one person's kindness while the other person constantly takes advantage of it.

Beauty will eventually become familiar. Money can disappear. Attraction can fluctuate. Careers can change. Circumstances can become completely different from what you expected when you first met.

Character becomes much more important when the excitement fades and real life begins.

When you lose your job, become sick, experience financial difficulties or simply go through a season when you are not at your best, you will discover what kind of person you actually married.

You don't want someone who watches you struggle simply because you did not ask. You want someone who notices. You want someone who cares. You want someone who can say, “I can see that you are struggling. Let me help.”

Most importantly, you want someone who can help you without later using your vulnerable moment as ammunition against you.

When choosing a spouse, look beyond the person who makes your heart beat faster.

Pay attention to the person who makes you feel safe when life becomes difficult. Marry kindness. Marry empathy. Marry discretion. Marry character.

Those qualities become priceless when the beautiful and exciting parts of marriage meet real life.

Cc nlfpmod seun Dominique farano

In Summary,Men marry a woman that genuinely loves and cares for you and vice versa.

100%.

Guys should never accept a woman who doesn't have a kind nature.

No excuses.

Bayoonanuga:
did Jesus Christ marry when he’s alive

na here you dey hide abi .are you the agbero chairman spokesman

THE PROBLEM IS YOU NEVER KNOW WHO YOU MARRY UNTIL AFTER THE MARRIAGE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiVQGz8-H_Y?si=Q-hGHSUa5csXy0Bp

Opposite of kindness is wickedness, so wicked and mean women should be avoided at all cost. Sha many women dey under this category

General rule. Get a kind person in your corner and life will be fair to an extent to you.

You don't want someone who watches you struggle simply because you did not ask. You want someone who notices. You want someone who cares. You want someone who can say, “I can see that you are struggling. Let me help.”

Pay attention to the person who makes you feel safe when life becomes difficult. Marry kindness. Marry empathy. Marry discretion. Marry character.

Kindness is difficult to assess in women expecially when dating because they often put their best foot forward during courtship.
The best indicator isn’t how well she treats you when dating, but how she consistently treat you when she's angry, disappointed, stressed, or when they have nothing to gain from being nice.

Fact. As a married man of over 10years experience, I will tell you that Kindness is about the most important quality to look for in a lady or a man.

Belurved1:
Kindness is difficult to assess in women expecially when dating because they often put their best foot forward during courtship.
The best indicator isn’t how well she treats you when dating, but how she consistently treat you when she's angry, disappointed, stressed, or when they have nothing to gain from being nice.

Look at how she treats others. How she responds to others in distress. She can feign how she responds to or treats you before marriage when the lovey dovey jinger is on, but she can't feign that of others.
How she treats others is how she will treat you in years to come.

It is how she will treat your family.

professore:
You don't want someone who watches you struggle simply because you did not ask. You want someone who notices. You want someone who cares. You want someone who can say, “I can see that you are struggling. Let me help.”

Pay attention to the person who makes you feel safe when life becomes difficult. Marry kindness. Marry empathy. Marry discretion. Marry character.

God bless you.

Please marry good character. Don't marry just for looks.
There are good people out there. Be a good person yourself and do your best to find a good person.

No one is perfect. Even you are not. But know the deal breakers you must never ignore.

Learn or perísh.

Kindness is not negotiable

Absolutely! It's all about the little things. A gentle touch, a warm smile. it's all about the perfect fit, really.

Bayoonanuga:
did Jesus Christ marry when he’s alive

Also, let me ask you, Will you be crucified?

Kenmarine:
Above all dont overlook her family...

This is a frequently overlooked advice.

Porksupplyib:
God bless you.

Please marry good character. Don't marry just for looks.
There are good people out there. Be a good person yourself and do your best to find a good person.

No one is perfect. Even you are not. But know the deal breakers you must never ignore.

Well said, well said, well said

Chioma Davido is an exceptionally kind girl, one of the virtues that made Davido stick to her

Of course, they can ignore kindness and go for virgin🙄

Very true. A kind woman brings peace to the home. My home has always been filled with peace because of the woman God blessed me with.

How she treats others is how she will treat you in years to come.

If she treats you the way she treats others, then you're not different from others.

Porksupplyib:
Look at how she treats others. How she responds to others in distress. She can feign how she responds to or treats you before marriage when the lovey dovey jinger is on, but she can't feign that of others.
How she treats others is how she will treat you in years to come.

It is how she will treat your family.

Make sure you are also a kind man

it is always better when a kind man marries a kind woman