Don't think you over reacted...but I think he's not that good when it comes to chicks.....ignore him not...it myt affct his psyche 4 all yhu knw

Kinkybraids:
There is this guy who is two years older than me so I assumed he was a matured guy but dam I was so wrong.

Its not a question of maturity. You just weren't attracted.

Why would a guy do this?

Because he has a cóck.

Ps: I dont really dress provocatively...I swear. When he came over I was wearing a long boobtube maxi dress... nothing suggestive about that

Yeah right. What you wore has no significance. Everyone knows what's in a cookie-jar .

Ill say the fact here...1st from all assessment from the guy's point of view you're cheap...and you woudnt b here complaining abt 'men' if it was a guy you like......

Don't even know who to side or blame. But my dear you shouldn't have asked him to help you fix your pc at all. You gave the guy a very wrong signal.

The guy is a learner seriously.

Stop avoiding him sha. Play cool on him and don't ask him for anything.

Kinkybraids:


Why poor him? How does a guy just ask a girl for sex when he isnt even dating her... you can lure a woman into sex but to blatantly ask for it

He never asked for sex just a sleep over , abi is there any other thing you're not telling us

So it was just one guy


I thought all the men in the world wanted to sleep over.


Abeg edit your post b4 I open my eyes.

Kinkybraids:
There is this guy who is two years older than me so I assumed he was a matured guy but dam I was so wrong.

I met him this year because we were in the same class. The guy was shy when we spoke. Long story short he came to me and confessed that he had feelings for me like two months ago and would like us to be together ...

I told him I admire his bravery for telling me how he feels but I wasn't looking to start any relationship because its almost the end of the year but I wouldn't mind being friends (Dont give me that look ... yes I friendzoned him)

He would ask to come over and chill but I always had an excuse...I didnt want awkward moments. Two weeks back I asked him to come fix something on the pc so he did and we chilled after he was done. Very good conversation...nothing awkward.

Next day around 8pm I get a message from him saying I miss you, please can I spend the night ... I lost it, I wanted to go all crazy on his ass but I just calmly asked him to explain. Without any remorse he just said that we would get snacks, watch a movie and he would sleep over!
I was so angry and insulted! what made him think he could just ask me something like that and I would agree? Did I look easy to him?

I know you will attack me for this but usually if a guy likes me and I have no feelings I ignore him completely so by asking if we could be friends I adjusted my usual method and this is what I get If a woman invites you to her room that is not an invitation for anything else.

He didnt apologize when i told him how it made me feel, he just said but you knew how i felt from the beginning! I have been ignoring him for two weeks now.

Is it ok for him to have asked me to spend the night? ... besides having poor game I guess he had nothing to loose

Am I over reacting?

Why would a guy do this? (except for the obvious) ... what gave him the green light?

Ps: I dont really dress provocatively...I swear. When he came over I was wearing a long boobtube maxi dress... nothing suggestive about that

my dear, I'm even surprised at some of the responses i read..... That guy in question was just plain immature..... Even if a girl u like gives you the green light, you dont just go jumping at it. you need to give her time to really know if thats what she wants, so for him to even suggest commin to spend d night at ur place is just out of place.... No matter how much u miss a girl, you should never ask to stay at HER place.... My dear, you didnt even do enough but atleast you verbally b!tch slapped his raggetty bottom.... some people may think I'm a girl disguised as a guy cos of this post but just for the knowing, I a full blooded 23yr old male with a girlfriend and trust me, I dont like the Idea of staying at my girlfriends place even tho most times i dont have a choice and thats cos SHE IS MY GF but this dude wants to spend the night in d house of a girl he's trying to impress on just d second night after she asked for his help.... Cmon.... Who does that?? My two cups of garri sha!!! sick dude....

End time things...



Op, u're right BTW...



He thought u were completely into him at dis stage or jst anoda of d easy do-and-getaway girls lying erywhr these days.

IMO, he deserved more dan what he got, for failing to do his homework.

FLYGERIAN91:
my dear, I'm even surprised at some of the responses i read..... That guy in question was just plain immature..... Even if a girl u like gives you the green light, you dont just go jumping at it. you need to give her time to really know if thats what she wants, so for him to even suggest commin to spend d night at ur place is just out of place.... No matter how much u miss a girl, you should never ask to stay at HER place.... My dear, you didnt even do enough but atleast you verbally b!tch slapped his raggetty bottom.... some people may think I'm a girl disguised as a guy cos of this post but just for the knowing, I a full blooded 23yr old male with a girlfriend and trust me, I dont like the Idea of staying at my girlfriends place even tho most times i dont have a choice and thats cos SHE IS MY GF but this dude wants to spend the night in d house of a girl he's trying to impress on just d second night after she asked for his help.... Cmon.... Who does that?? My two cups of garri sha!!! sick dude....

THANK YOU... finally someone who gets it! Im so glad. Its like everyone thinks its normal to just do that. Your response shows emotional maturity...I dont think it means you are a woman pretending to be a man

neoapocalypse:


He never asked for sex just a sleep over , abi is there any other thing you're not telling us

Why would a guy who is not dating me a girl ask to sleep over if he is not trying to initiate sex ... I only have one bed where would he sleep? why does he need to sleep over

...

Emodeee:


r u a virgin? if u r nt, let him enjoy d benefit of friends wid benefits.
btw dn't u knw dat aving pity 4 a guy smtimes means luv? if u dn't, ask ur female folks.

Im not a virgin but that doesnt mean any nigga cant just have some unless I invite him in. I pity him because sometimes you love someone and you cant help it so why punish him

Equado:
Ill say the fact here...1st from all assessment from the guy's point of view you're cheap...and you woudnt b here complaining abt 'men' if it was a guy you like......

Well unfortunately his assessment was so wrong and it serves him right! and yes if it was a guy I liked I would have been hurt but I wouldnt complain ...I would just laugh it off and play game so yes you are right in that aspect

Mrfils:
End time things...



Op, u're right BTW...



He thought u were completely into him at dis stage or jst anoda of d easy do-and-getaway girls lying erywhr these days.

IMO, he deserved more dan what he got, for failing to do his homework.

I just don't understand why he thought this... We went out for food and I paid for myself because I didnt want to give him the wrong impression. Every-time he would try and flirt I would change the subject.

But he no one can truly know what goes on in a mans mind

Kinkybraids:


THANK YOU... finally someone who gets it! Im so glad. Its like everyone thinks its normal to just do that. Your response shows emotional maturity...I dont think it means you are a woman pretending to be a man

I'm sure alot of people get ur point but are scared of being called "woman wrapper"(lol)... But on a serious note, its unethical and un-manly just that these days alot of men see it as trophy to get it down with a lady as quick as possible but not forgetting there are still loads of right thinking men out there who know how to treat a lady like one.... Dont worry.... U didnt do nothing wrong....

But then again you should work with the present world you live in. I know it gets you mad and all but there are reasons why people place strict boundaries and operate with certain rules. Don't just blank him though its best to just explain to him that you are not interested and let it go. if he keeps insisting then you will know what next to do. you could visit my blog for direct advice. the blog link is on my signature

lilmax:
next time tell him to lure you

There wont be a next time, we will never see each other again

Kinkybraids:


There wont be a next time, we will never see each other again

whatever

Kinkybraids:


I just don't understand why he thought this... We went out for food and I paid for myself because I didnt want to give him the wrong impression. Every-time he would try and flirt I would change the subject.

But he no one can truly know what goes on in a mans mind

Yeah, even d Bible agrees with u. The heart of man (both sexes) is desperately wicked, who can knw it?

Jst b cool with him though, n try to kill d lights as possible

Mrfils:

Yeah, even d Bible agrees with u. The heart of man (both sexes) is desperately wicked, who can knw it?

Jst b cool with him though, n try to kill d lights as possible

Yeah Ill make amends before we leave since we will never see each other again.

adepiero:
from your write up, he didn't ask you for sex! he only asked to sleep over.

he might feel you are shy, and playing hard to get so he decided to take the bull by the horn.

or he might just wanna share your bed with no intention of sex or with the hope of getting lucky and scoring in the process

Really? So its a norm for guys to just sleep over a lady's place with no intention of sex if that is the case I didnt get the memo...I dont get it and ill never agree with it.

samflexxy:
I get you 'but'
No he might actually be innocent have slept in a room with a female friend for almost a month and nothing happened
Learn to trust people don't judge a book by its cover

Well to me its not normal and Ill never trust any nigga...He can sleep with his other female friends but Im not doing that ish ... I dont trust people until they have proven themselves it saves a lot of time

...I think im still angry

FLYGERIAN91:
I'm sure alot of people get ur point but are scared of being called "woman wrapper"(lol)... But on a serious note, its unethical and un-manly just that these days alot of men see it as trophy to get it down with a lady as quick as possible but not forgetting there are still loads of right thinking men out there who know how to treat a lady like one.... Dont worry.... U didnt do nothing wrong....

lol I think you could teach that guy a thing or two

I didnt mention that the guy is from Zimbabwe and Im South African ( lol I know it has nothing to do with Nigeria) but the stereotypes still exist about SA ladies where ever the guy is from. I think he thought in his ignorant mind that since I'm South African I'm probably easy and he can get away with such crap. I think this is how many foreign guys think about SA women..which in many cases is false.

Kinkybraids:


Why would a guy who is not dating me a girl ask to sleep over if he is not trying to initiate sex ... I only have one bed where would he sleep? why does he need to sleep over

I have done that in the past with my female friends and nothing happened

moneyhungry:
...

If my friend was till around I would just ask him for advice and I wouldn't resort to all this publicity

... can I have some?

sanchezzz:
Don't even know who to side or blame. But my dear you shouldn't have asked him to help you fix your pc at all. You gave the guy a very wrong signal.

The guy is a learner seriously.

Stop avoiding him sha. Play cool on him and don't ask him for anything.

wow so fixing something or doing me a favor equates to sex as payment? come on that's unfair but i get your point

Kinkybraids:
There is this guy who is two years older than me so I assumed he was a matured guy but dam I was so wrong.

I met him this year because we were in the same class. The guy was shy when we spoke. Long story short he came to me and confessed that he had feelings for me like two months ago and would like us to be together ...

I told him I admire his bravery for telling me how he feels but I wasn't looking to start any relationship because its almost the end of the year but I wouldn't mind being friends (Dont give me that look ... yes I friendzoned him)

He would ask to come over and chill but I always had an excuse...I didnt want awkward moments. Two weeks back I asked him to come fix something on the pc so he did and we chilled after he was done. Very good conversation...nothing awkward.

Next day around 8pm I get a message from him saying I miss you, please can I spend the night ... I lost it, I wanted to go all crazy on his ass but I just calmly asked him to explain. Without any remorse he just said that we would get snacks, watch a movie and he would sleep over!
I was so angry and insulted! what made him think he could just ask me something like that and I would agree? Did I look easy to him?

I know you will attack me for this but usually if a guy likes me and I have no feelings I ignore him completely so by asking if we could be friends I adjusted my usual method and this is what I get If a woman invites you to her room that is not an invitation for anything else.

He didnt apologize when i told him how it made me feel, he just said but you knew how i felt from the beginning! I have been ignoring him for two weeks now.

Is it ok for him to have asked me to spend the night? ... besides having poor game I guess he had nothing to loose

Am I over reacting?

Why would a guy do this? (except for the obvious) ... what gave him the green light?

Ps: I dont really dress provocatively...I swear. When he came over I was wearing a long boobtube maxi dress... nothing suggestive about that

For your mind now, abi? :/
The Bleep is with you?

neoapocalypse:


I have done that in the past with my female friends and nothing happened

Wow... but you were never attracted to any of them so you didnt try anything right? like under what circumstances would you sleep over

Kinkybraids:


Wow... but you were never attracted to any of them so you didnt try anything right? like under what circumstances would you sleep over

My best buddies have always been girls , Annie ( an old classmate of mine ) was my best friend for years. We were so close people actually thought we were dating , she told me everything about her while I told her my deepest secrets , we were just that close. There were days I'd go see her over the weekend and nothing would happen , eventually when she began a serious relationship I had to draw back so as not to send the wrong signals to the bf. Today she's married with a kid and I can't just barge into her home , in fact I haven't been to her home in more than four years but yeah I slept over at her place when we were much younger and nothing was attached.

neoapocalypse:


My best buddies have always been girls , Annie ( an old classmate of mine ) was my best friend for years. We were so close people actually thought we were dating , she told me everything about her while I told her my deepest secrets , we were just that close. There were days I'd go see her over the weekend and nothing would happen , eventually when she began a serious relationship I had to draw back so as not to send the wrong signals to the bf. Today she's married with a kid and I can't just barge into her home , in fact I haven't been to her home in more than four years but yeah I slept over at her place when we were much younger and nothing was attached.

You see this makes sense you were best friends for years, you never had feelings for her so it makes sense. I can also think of a friend who id allow to sleep over because we have been friends for 5 years. But this guy is not my best friend, iv know him this year because we do the same coarse but we just started talking two months ago.. prior to him fixing the pc I would only allow him up to the gate or sitting room, never in my room. I get you though

Kinkybraids:


You see this makes sense you were best friends for years, you never had feelings for her so it makes sense. I can also think of a friend who id allow to sleep over because we have been friends for 5 years. But this guy is not my best friend, iv know him this year because we do the same coarse but we just started talking two months ago.. prior to him fixing the pc I would only allow him up to the gate or sitting room, never in my room. I get you though

I get your drift too but you don't have to be annoyed at his proposal , just turn down the offer nicely

Kinkybraids:


lol I think you could teach that guy a thing or two

I didnt mention that the guy is from Zimbabwe and Im South African ( lol I know it has nothing to do with Nigeria) but the stereotypes still exist about SA ladies where ever the guy is from. I think he thought in his ignorant mind that since I'm South African I'm probably easy and he can get away with such crap. I think this is how many foreign guys think about SA women..which in many cases is false.

my dear, forget where ur from.... North south east or west, that guy didnt do the right thing.... You re a lady and should be treated as one..... Every lady desrves a good man..... #team NIGERIA#.... Race and ethnicity shouldnt be a basis through which anybody should calculate a womans worth.... Like I said, every woman desrves to be treated as one.... Your man is still out there.... my advice, show that dude that you are more than that, dont ignore him but give him a veeeeerrrrrryyyy lllooooonnngggg yard stick..... Let him know straight up that he aint yo type o man n that you certainly aint cheap and move on with your life having no regrets whatsoever.....