₦airaland Forum

akinlex:
i didnt pass through these cos i was bred in Asia, bangladesh to be precise

lonelydora:
100% truth. My parents always come first in class upto University level and my Dad didn't make a 5.00 first class.


Me: Mama, i don't know what to wear to church today.
Mum: Go to my box in my wardrobe and choose one wrapper and wear.

Benfaco:
Network!!! almost made fp

damiso:
Love it.
Exactly my parents to a T esp the academics part.I got 6 A's at SSCE but a P in maths(my weak link)that P cancelled out the 6 A's automatically

MhisIjay:
Op u forgot dis one; weneva u visit d barbing saloon u ve to SCRAPE ur hair
I remember my mum chasing me back to d barbing saloon for barbing my hair nd nt SCRAPING it

nickz:
lmao.............. just reminded me of my fathers beating.....if he slaps you and you form boss/strongman or you act like you didn't feel it
never really understood ibo that time
alll dawned on me not too long ago
he would say "so you are forming teminator for me nicholas,i gbago dimkpa right??"
after this statement you had to follow this rules if you wanted to survive

Rule 1:don't try to run
Rule 2:maintain maximum eye to eye contact
Rule 3:don't try to call my mums name while begging (my mother will from nowhere plant 2 "saddam hussein type bomb" slaps on your cheek)
Rule 4:don't shout too much...complicates things
Rule 5:always stay on his left hand side(he's left-handed so the force of the slap won't be that heavy if you position well
Rule6:if he's using a cane and it falls off his hand,act very fast;pick it up and hand it over to him ASAP
Rule7:don't anticipate "the end"...........the end might be 2 weeks later

MissMeiya:
Asians and Africans have practically identical upbringings. All my friends in college were Asians.

They would recognize everything on this list.

MissMeiya:
Has anyone ever gotten "Are you going to school, or fashion parade?"

Ok, wait do schools in Nigeria all have uniforms?

nickz:
lmao.............. just reminded me of my fathers beating.....if he slaps you and you form boss/strongman or you act like you didn't feel it
never really understood ibo that time
alll dawned on me not too long ago
he would say "so you are forming teminator for me nicholas,i gbago dimkpa right??"
after this statement you had to follow this rules if you wanted to survive

Rule 1:don't try to run
Rule 2:maintain maximum eye to eye contact
Rule 3:don't try to call my mums name while begging (my mother will from nowhere plant 2 "saddam hussein type bomb" slaps on your cheek)
Rule 4:don't shout too much...complicates things
Rule 5:always stay on his left hand side(he's left-handed so the force of the slap won't be that heavy if you position well
Rule6:if he's using a cane and it falls off his hand,act very fast;pick it up and hand it over to him ASAP
Rule7:don't anticipate "the end"...........the end might be 2 weeks later

Livingwalker:
Hahahhahaaaaa chai ....you are so on point ...I taught I was the only one ooo that observed this rules hahahaha I stubborn sha

Bunsky:
This thread is just hitting front page, since may 2013.
Nawao

MhisIjay:
Op u forgot dis one; weneva u visit d barbing saloon u ve to SCRAPE ur hair
I remember my mum chasing me back to d barbing saloon for barbing my hair nd nt SCRAPING it

Omg,you are 1oo percent right.let me add mine

i remember as a pre teen one boy in jss 3 sent a love letter to me.there was no phone or social networks then and he put the letter in one colourful enveloped,perfumed it and sent it througj a juniour in jss1.when i read the letter he sent to me ' you are the love of my life,i cant sleep without thinking of you,you are the most beautiful girl i have ever seen and other bull sh1t like that,i was so happy i kept the letter so closely and when i got home my mom asked me to remove my school uniform and go and spread it on the railings.meanwhile the letter was inside my school uniform and i forgot it was there and so the letter fell off my pocket while she was washing clothes,of course she saw the wind blowing it off and she said shewa go and bring that paper ( in my mind i was like moku o) i said it is just rough paper and she said abi ori awon ale baba e daru ni,i said go and brinmg that paper that flew off from your pocket.if that paper should go i will kill you today.

Anyway i chased the letter and gave her.she read it out and stood up to adjust her wrapper again.she said ha shewa otiku leni.ti awon ota e mati baje. i was already vibrating.she said so because you are already growing breast,you want to bring pregnancy into this house abi.she started beating and biting me.she said dont you know if a boy start sending letters to you he will touch you and if he touches you,you will get pregnant.it is today i will kill you.so you have started following boys you want to waste my money abi

the woman beat me like tomorrow no dey.when my dad came back from work she showed him,my dad said so you want to get pregnant abi.otirinrinkurin,oya kneel down since then,they changed my school to all girls school
today when i remember,i laugh at my self