₦airaland Forum

Lol cant stop laughing imagining u trying to take off d butt pad from ur wife's ass.

Pls take it easy that singular act n ur fixation on d butt pad says alot about ur person. first i see a man dat has lost control of his family that he has to result to struggling with a woman for undies .did u try to understand why she wears it maybe self esteem booster. wen u tell her u dont like it was it in a quarrelsome tone.

U ve painted ur wife as d devil 4 all to condem but how innocent r u in all this.d lady u dated for 2 yrs didn't turn a devil overnight na. do u show her love n respect both r reciprocal in a marriage not earned by status.

pls sit ur wife down n work on communication women dont turn devil's overnight.

miredia:
regardless of how microscopic your search becomes, you'll never find that flawless character since you aren't flawless to begin with.

I can't see where you drew the idea of flawlessnes from my post.
My point is whether 5% or 99% percent perfection, we all have choices. Therefore, whatever choice u make based on your preference, don't come and complain or generalise as per your experience.

@op frm the look of things, u married from a wrong home. The deal has already been done though: the best thing is you stay away to avoid loss of life, either yours or hers, at least till you both can come to terms or part ways finally.

she doesnt love you ...and her siblings are sick to support her behaviour ...run for your life oo...

yomanovic:
@op frm the look of things, u married from a wrong home. The deal has already been done though: the best thing is you stay away to avoid loss of life, either yours or hers, at least till you both can come to terms or part ways finally.

Honestly the OP need SANFOR, real one that will touch his spine.... He say all this coming from the start....

Airpure:
Lol cant stop laughing imagining u trying to take off d butt pad from ur wife's ass.

Pls take it easy that singular act n ur fixation on d butt pad says alot about ur person. first i see a man dat has lost control of his family that he has to result to struggling with a woman for undies .did u try to understand why she wears it maybe self esteem booster. wen u tell her u dont like it was it in a quarrelsome tone.

U ve painted ur wife as d devil 4 all to condem but how innocent r u in all this.d lady u dated for 2 yrs didn't turn a devil overnight na. do u show her love n respect both r reciprocal in a marriage not earned by status.

pls sit ur wife down n work on communication women dont turn devil's overnight.

Rubbish. Self esteem for my own yansh?

Why she dey wear her yansh pad only when she won go out?

All these fake b1tches today and their wh0ring

Like seriously, didn't you read the signs before marrying her. Report the issue to your pastor or anyone she respects. If she doesn't change, then a divorce is necessary because there is no point being with a woman who can't breathe life into her man and be his peace! If the child is your consideration for not getting a divorce, then understand that it much more dangerous for him to grow in your current environment as it will destroy him... By the way, I still kinda think you have been economical with telling us your actions that sets her off too!

cococandy:
Are you the type that like your wife to work and deposit her salary in your personal account so that you will allocate to her how much she can spend on her bra and pant.

If she gets money you guys will build the house in your name alone so that one day when you're tired you will marry a new sisi and chase her out as the house is "your house" alone.

Most of you have slave master mentality. Tell me why you won't have rebellious wives?

smh see what am talking about?? nigerian girls wana eat their cake and have it, imagine keeping your money and i build my house with my money , you expect me to write your name, God forbid, a well educated man can write only his name on the house he and his wife sweat for, you people just have a default mentality smh

Be careful,i think your life is in danger.Avoid her as much as possible.I pray God gives you wisdom to make the right decision

Na wa o. Some marriages sha. May God help us. But one needs to ask, who raised these imbeciles?

cococandy:
Are you the type that like your wife to work and deposit her salary in your personal account so that you will allocate to her how much she can spend on her bra and pant.

If she gets money you guys will build the house in your name alone so that one day when you're tired you will marry a new sisi and chase her out as the house is "your house" alone.

Most of you have slave master mentality. Tell me why you won't have rebellious wives?

i have actually seen a woman in the u.s. sell her dad's car she inherited so she and her husband can get a house, and you nigerian mentality girls are here wanting to reap were you did not sow

I advise u seek a divorce.
Marriage can b managed, but to some extent.

You self you are not man enough. You should have stopped her whenever she addresses you rudely not to talk of when she started cursing you.

Tell your mummy to go home.

Do you have bachelor friends ? Pick your clothe and leave the house for weeks. Send money to her account when they pay your salary.

Your baby will be fine.

She need to be taught a serious lesson and no matter what she does, don't let her know it gets to you.

TDstarr:
smh see what am talking about?? nigerian girls wana eat their cake and have it, imagine keeping your money and i build my house with my money , you expect me to write your name, God forbid, a well educated man can write only his name on the house he and his wife sweat for, you people just have a default mentality smh

if you marry a wife who keeps her money to herself and expects you to do everything with yours while hers remain in her account, then there is something missing. It is obvious she doesn't understand that both of you are in it together.

Marriage is partnership. So her money can't be hers alone and yours should not be yours alone. You're supposed to pool your resources together and undergo projects together. Hence in marriage there is no reason why one person should say "my house" . I hope my point is clear now.

Kill her b4 she kills you! Grow some balls Nigger.

....one question I asked myself after reading, didn't any of this issues arose while dating. You claimed you dated for 2 years and you endured this or hoping she would change.
I smell a rat that maybe she from a rich family and that got you blinded...
....i think you should Pray about it, try and understand her, cos obviously u don't, cos if you do, then u won't be complaining this much.
God Help you

ibrokola:
Like seriously, didn't you read the signs before marrying her. Report the issue to your pastor or anyone she respects. If she doesn't[b] change[/b], then a divorce is necessary because there is no point being with a woman who can't breathe life into her man and be his peace! If the child is your consideration for not getting a divorce, then understand that it much more dangerous for him to grow in your current environment as it will destroy him... By the way, I still kinda think you have been economical with telling us your actions that sets her off too!

Change ke!
That was her true color and no body can change any body, if you like speak or counsel from now till thy kingdom come that woman na be.st (sorry) who does that to raise negative words on the husband.
The only place i blame the guy so well is he entering a physical fight with a woman.... NO NO NO that no good!

@Op. In as much as you place all options on table....divorce is the last resort. Your wife is not as bad as you described her. She sure has some good sides. She needs anger management likewise your self. Talk one on one....identify the root of the problem. Avoid third party involvement from.both sides....show each other respect....Be the man try to improve your finances. Learn to ignore....some women stuff. Yansh pad or no Yansh pad. Enjoy your marriage if you both cherish it.

Rotflmao, lmao, lmao, lmao

*dies* @ this butt pad drama. Op, I think we need to hear from this woman honestly. Too funny Abeg. I don't even know what to say. Two crazy people

TDstarr:
i have actually seen a woman in the u.s. sell her dad's car she inherited so she and her husband can get a house, and you nigerian mentality girls are here wanting to reap were you did not sow

i guess I've been talking to the wind since. Or more likely fetching water with a basket. Where in any part of my post did I say a person should reap where they did not sow?

Arghh. Read and digest.

@OP e ti wo nu one sance (one chance). Prayer na d solution o! Turn to God.

28 years old and she's so brainless (no vex o OP).

No matter how pretty, hot, beautiful and numbers of butt pad she wears, she will go nowhere with this attitude of hers.She's very arrogant and wicked.Or is there anything you have done to her that makes her behave this way.

If NO,OP please move on with your life.Please.

adbokus:
come on, she tore his cloth and obviously she wanted the 'fight' badly. From what the Op wrote he had never on any occasion done such, he mostly ignored her. This woman has something dangerously wrong with her both spiritually and psychologically. She's not remorseful, not reasonable, mutinous, has hurtful inclinations, and then she picks her calls in camera. This is not marriage, it's madrage!...

you are right, this isn't a marriage, at the same time he knows he married a crazy person and decided to join her in her craziness.

[quote author=chronique post=29493438]Those of you asking him to divorce her,are in a way wicked. Have you people forgotten that some of us are still single and looking for wives? Do you want us to go and use head to carry this type of bad market that OP wants to throw away?

@ OP: pls whatever you do,do not divorce her. Find where to tie that thing to. But if you must send her away,pls let me have a picture of her so that where ever I see her,I can run with my two legs.]

Rotfl

Rep042:
My marriage is just 1 year and few days old,but within the last 365 days,I have seen torment and hell on daily basis. We dated for 2 years before tying the knot,she's a nice person,but her mouth is destructive,she has this overbearing attitude,always trying to control me or dictate the pace,and can keep malice,anger and record of evil done to her for a long time. She's the type of person that talks very well,I mean convincely well,but unfortunately,she speaks more negative words. She can talk for hours non-stop,especially when provoked,saying all sorts of bad words.

She has threatened to kill me & send assassins after me on different occasions in the past,though I just ignored such threats.

My wife has been abusing me verbally and always say nasty things at every slightest provocation and at the same ready to engage me in fisticuffs.

She can really say unprintable words such as "it will not be well with you","as you go out,people will deal with you", "you will work like an elephant and eat like an ant", "this your certificate will never yield you any good thing", etc, name callings,abuses,curses etc.

Please Nairalanders, I will like to know if it is wrong or out of place for a working class married lady to assist her husband in paying some bills or buying some foodstuffs at home. Because,anytime she assists in doing anything,she will record it and consequently use that to abuse and insult me whenever we have misunderstanding and or exchange of words.

After our traditional marriage on December 2013,I had some financial challenges,and then my rent was due for renewable,she offered to assist,at first I was skeptical about it ,because I know her kind of person,knowing full well that she will use that to ridicule and abuse me in no distant time. But,then,I didn't have any alternative,so I allowed her pay d rent. Now,she's claiming ownership,saying ..."which house,the one that I have been paying the rent or another one"...

She has done a lot of character assassination & damages to my personality before some of her relatives & family members(Her father and two sisters),thus they all support her & no longer regard me as anybody.

Few months into our marriage,she started wearing butt pads, I told her to stop ,because I don't like the stuff,but she flared up and we had exchange of words. She told me that she has to look good to outsiders.

Throughout her pregnancy period,she wore the butt pads on daily basis even at home,I allowed her because of her condition,even though it looked disgusting on her. After she put to bed,and few days later, I told her to quit wearing that stuff, but she refused,then I seized it,she started ranting to the hearing of everyone at home & neighbors that I have taken her padded pants(aka butt pad) to native doctor. I just ignored her. Few days later, she bought another set.

On Xmas day(2014),she dressed up & wore the butt pads again,I told her to remove it ,but she refused,then i tried forcing her to do so,and that resulted to a serious fight. She tore my already ironed clothes to pieces(an expensive Indian attire I bought when I travelled to India),I tore hers too and forced the butt pads out from her body.

Hell was let loose that day,because she called her sisters,they came to my house and created a very nasty scene in my neighborhood,they insulted,ridiculed me and made a mockery of me,her elder sister who is a police officer threatened to deal with me,she was talking and hitting her hands on the ground saying that,they are going to teach me some bitter lessons in this town. I tried to respond but my Mum,who's on child's visit(Omugwo) asked me to hold my peace. It wasn't easy though,they also insulted her too.

Since that day till date,my wife doesn't talk to me. The only thing that connects us now is the new born baby.

Her words have actually killed me psychologically, emotionally etc, to the extent that sometimes, I loose consciousness of my surrounding while driving to and fro from work , I will be lost in thought, and on a particular occasion nearly rammed another moving vehicle,if not for the speed bumps on the road that awaken my consciousness.


Her words:"if you are still regarding me as your wife,then you wasting your time". Its obvious she wants a divorce because to her,she's still very young(28 years),and can easily move on. She doesn't give a damn.

She has also repeated that same threat of killing me,these days ,the number of calls entering her phone is amazing,most times,she goes far from the house to answer those calls.

Please,kindly advice me.
Thank you.

Its a phase of marriage. You are the boss and i believe you can handle it.

If i had known how overbearing ladies can be i would have just kept mum and watched my ex when she started her own trouble waking up one day to tell me she would move on at 30 if stagnancy continues and i can only wonder what that word "stagnancy" means because the last time i checked i was till managing t bring home like 100k a month though reduced from the usual 200k or more for the past years.

She would say stuffs like she feels we are not meant for each other,that i should go out and seek help because she feels i have offended someone simply because of my dwindling clearing business. She would say crazy stuffs like she wants to move on, she feels caged with me all her life since she has been with me for 11years with 6years of courtship and 5years of marriage as i met her when she was just 19.

See i cant list all the trsh she said including the one she implied that maybe it was never love and trust me i had to let her go before i develop high bp so if she really wants to go let her but don't initiate the divorce. Just calm down and watch her and let her be.

Divorce can be messy and complicated.

mystiqueDZ:
This lady must be beautifulllllll for you to overlook her bad mouth and still married her....

felicity111:
what God has joined together let no man,church,behaviour,insults; put assunder

MissMeiya:
OP, you sound like a dumbass. What do you want us to tell you.

Is that all you have to say You ladies, especially on NL are very wicked and evil...if the story was about how the husband beats or abuses the wife you all come out and spew trash, now the story is the other way round and you are here making silly statements.... mtchhhheeeewwww.

Please get somewhere else to stay till you decide on what is best for you. Staying in an abusive and potentially violent relationship does no one any good.

There is a thin line between love and hate.

dBard:
As in eh...
frankly, some guys deserve some sense knocked into them.
were you blind the 2 years u dated that u didn't see these attitudes
...n u were busy fighting with her to the point of creating a show for the neighbors...
waiting for the neighborhood feminists to show up n tear u apart make I laff.


p.s..for the sake of the child, split
That is NO atmosphere for a child to develop in.

Lol, dat kind perso if u leave am, na to pack comot for Nija be dat. Dat kind lady na one chance. Dis kind tin happened to one of my cousin and about d Christmas break, he sent message to everyone who accompanied him to go bring the woman say he wan go return dia package back to dem. It's worst dat my uncles and dad supports d woman say that marriage is for life time, no matter wat it is, u should ve spotted it out before getting into it. Funny enough, wen ever dey come to d villa, dem must fight either for beer joint or house and d woman no go just borrow small brain. If her husband dey spend, she go just call waiter to stop bringing anything, come dey shout for d guy for public say his wasteful lol. Wen dem ladies re growing, dey just believe beauty is just d selling point and mothers too dnt even help matters. Good luck to d dead and may God in heaven never lemme cross d path of such demons. Lol

It all balls down to leadership in the marriage. Your wife definitely have her own issues to deal with but don't force your will on her. Make sure every decision you make, it is to her own best interest. Let her see that. If your decisions are selfish in nature, she will definitely rebel against you. Be good to her and don't argue because you will always lose. Be nice and good to her. Every problem have a solution.
On death threads: if you feel your life is under thread, you can separate for a while until the storm rolls blows over.

[quote author=lolaxavier post=29491457][/quote]Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that my method was perfect. And I believe 2 years is reasonable. But that said, I've come to realise that the longer you date, any form of pretense begins to fade as both parties begin to see the other's true colours. Only then can they decide either to take their relationship to the next level or end it.

As for the OP'S case, if he noticed all these traits of his wife before marriage and still proceeded to marry her, Hmmm mm.....then he just shot himself in the foot cos a wife can either make or Marr her husband.

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