₦airaland Forum

ammyluv2002:
The key word here is 'compromise' True love covers all sin....there are things you have to let go just for love. Having sex before marriage isn't the main thing. It's something one can endure and wait for the right time.

Do you know the guy's reason(s)?

Because sex is so important to marriage. And it's part of the things a couple should taste before they finally commit.

Sex is all part of knowing each other. It's as important as living together and getting to know your faults. Many marriages break up because of sex. It's not because of lack of love. But because either or both partners failed to understand the importance of sex.

It's all well and good to remain chaste till marriage. But don't be surprised when most men (and even women) walk away from you cos of that.

ammyluv2002:
Cause sex shouldn't stand between true love.....why the rush when he will finally get married to her? If the babe isn't cool with sex before marriage why break up with her because of that?

I'd disagree with you. Sex is and has always been an important part of true love. Anybody who has Fallen in love for real would tell you that. Love comes with a burning desire to kiss and touch and physically worship the object of your affection. Love makes the hormones rage. Causes butterflies in your stomach. If you love, you can't get enough of wanting to kiss and hold your partner.

On the moral side sex before marriage is bad. But naturally. .. morality aside. .. Sex and love should go hand in hand.

Like he said "that's his own orientation...". Sex issue can be complex sometimes, as a guy, I have met a girl at a particular time in my life that I think I would have married even if that requires me wedding till after wedding night sef. But we didn't even date officially till we finally grew apart.

On the other hand, I've been with some girls that I can't settle down with despite the intimacy.

It could just be that he wants to test the sexual chemistry before going on. But if you ask me, love no dey dia. The guy be wan just marry for marry sake, maybe he will eventually find love. He doesn't love the girl

ugojamali:
I'd disagree with you. Sex is and has always been an important part of true love. Anybody who has Fallen in love for real would tell you that. Love comes with a burning desire to kiss and touch and physically worship the object of your affection. Love makes the hormones rage. Causes butterflies in your stomach. If you love, you can't get enough of wanting to kiss and hold your partner.

On the moral side sex before marriage is bad. But naturally. .. morality aside. .. Sex and love should go hand in hand.

Agreed! Sex and love should go hand in hand but that doesn't mean not having it at a particular time should cause break up. If he truly loves the babe all he needs to do is to avoid staying in a closed door with the babe. There are measures to control one's desire for sex and I will say it till thy kingdom come......any guy that really loves a lady will do anything humanly possible to be with her if he feels he can't wait that long then he should hasten his moves and pay the babe's bride price then plan for the ceremonial later

@op from ur story, it's glaring that d dude never wanted to marry her he can't think of any reasonable excuse other than to come up with flimsy one such as d one he said to u.

Biblically we all know that pre marital sex is wrong but some but some dude sees it as social adventure that needs to be xplore b4 marriage, some will even want to be sure their wld be wife is capable of takin in before d marriage proper.

My submission: if u genuinely love a lady, her refusal of sex b4 marriage WILL NOT make u backk off..

ammyluv2002:
Agreed! Sex and love should go hand in hand but that doesn't mean not having it at a particular time should cause break up. If he truly loves the babe all he needs to do is to avoid staying in a closed door with the babe. There are measures to control one's desire for sex and I will say it till thy kingdom come......any guy that really loves a lady will do anything humanly possible to be with her if he feels he can't wait that long then he should hasten his moves and pay the babe's bride price then plan for the ceremonial later

Really do you think a man should hasten marriage because of sex? Lol.

ugojamali:
Really do you think a man should hasten marriage because of sex? Lol.

Really do you think a man should call off his engagement just because his fiancée wants to wait till marriage? Lol

I don't think I can marry a girl I haven't sslept with. If i was a virgin then I guess it makes sense but since I have sexual experience or whatnot. I need to know what I am getting myself into.

ammyluv2002:
Really do you think a man should call off his engagement just because his fiancée wants to wait till marriage? Lol

Lol. Honestly I think a man should only propose to a lady he has had sex already with.

ugojamali:
Lol. Honestly I think a man should only propose to a lady he has had sex already with.

Hmmmm.....okay! I rest my case

ammyluv2002:
Hmmmm.....okay! I rest my case

I understand your views though. And I agree in this case the man doesn't love the woman. He probably proposed just to deceive the girl and taste the pleasurable delights. Shame on him the gates of paradise were closed firmly after all his efforts.

Hazardd:
are we not paying for it or is marrying a woman free

not only making call with the phone, i also lose the phone to check the complete parts before i hand over my money to the seller because it is my money

oh really? thats quite plausible

sneak3:
@op from ur story, it's glaring that d dude never wanted to marry her he can't think of any reasonable excuse other than to come up with flimsy one such as d one he said to u.

Biblically we all know that pre marital sex is wrong but some but some dude sees it as social adventure that needs to be xplore b4 marriage, some will even want to be sure their wld be wife is capable of takin in before d marriage proper.

My submission: if u genuinely love a lady, her refusal of sex b4 marriage WILL NOT make u backk off..

thank you

Baddestguyp:
he doesn't want to end up with a retired ashii

how do you mean?

Shawl001:
I will say; there's more to this issue than it meets the eyes. @OP, U̶̲̥̅̊ shouldn't be discouraged about what he said, some people aint meant to be together. Jes follow ur own principles and let God lead you.

you are so so perceptive. Thanks anyway

adewumiopeyemi:
yes the guy is right hw sure if the girl is even a virgin..the guy ave to test what he want to buy... u no wat i mean

i cant remember saying that the girl is a virgin

Maybe d Guy wants to know her sexual Prowess ....Buh Bleep guys wu fink like dat ....a big nah to pre-marital sex ...he is not even happi he wants to marry a decent geh ...guess he is looking for a geh dah awon boiz don scatter

wristwatch:
Let me be diplomatic about my contribution.

Some guys want to know how good a lady is in bed before heading into marriage knowing they don't have the luxury of time to lecture their wife about sex.

Also others feel sex before marriage is sin as written in the bible. This type believe sex will be best enjoyed in marriage.

I will go for the 2nd opinion.

Coming back to op's question. I will advice the lady to wait for a man who respect her demands. She should not let desperation to cloud her judgement.

It is obvious that guy doesn't love her. He wants sexual relationship.

She should focus on her dream and let your dream man meets you.

thanks

Tallesty1:
It is ok to press your mango to know if e ripe reach inside before you buy am. (just saying)

who ask you

you have not contributed anything to the topic


i'm still listening

I don't think it can happen. Marry a girl I have not slept with. We won't wen date not to talk of marriage. She can find her own set. This is not about of you live me you wil wait. Don't turn me into a wanksta.

Everybody has someone they are both perfect for each other. Most of dis ladies who after bleeping every young rich guys in uni feel d wind is blowing past them,will change to spiritual ladies when searching for husband to deceive the Omo mummy boy that d never see anything. No need to hide anything.

We must knack wella or find urset.

Mprex:
who ask you

you have not contributed anything to the topic

Because you didn't tell us the guy's reason. You gotta wear someone's shoe before you judge the way they walk?

@ Op i don't blame the guy, coz a Broz in my street told me neva to go for untested product .. Coz he has issue with his wife, they neva born till date .. So there re so many issue's behind Non testing products ( even ladies ) .. So many of them their engine don dey smoke and dem go ring the engine ( package well well ) .. Sample what you re buying ..

Tallesty1:
Because you didn't tell us the guy's reason. You gotta wear someone's shoe before you judge the way they walk?

i indicated on my initial post that the guy said he ended the relationship because the lady wasnt willing to indulge in premarital sex. What other reason are you talking about?


Moreover, i wasnt judging the guy in anyway. I was just wondering if refusal to have sex before marriage by his fiancee was reason enough for him to call of an engagement

ligopedro:
@ Op i don't blame the guy, coz a Broz in my street told me neva to go for untested product .. Coz he has issue with his wife, they neva born till date .. So there re so many issue's behind Non testing products ( even ladies ) .. So many of them their engine don dey smoke and dem go ring the engine ( package well well ) .. Sample what you re buying ..

you mean having sex with your spouse before marriage is a guarantee that she will give you kids in marriage?

Mprex:
you mean having sex with your spouse before marriage is a guarantee that she will give you kids in marriage?

Dunno about anyone but it works for me and i got 2 boyz ..

apparentlylaw:
Maybe d Guy wants to know her sexual Prowess ....Buh Bleep guys wu fink like dat ....a big nah to pre-marital sex ...he is not even happi he wants to marry a decent geh ...guess he is looking for a geh dah awon boiz don scatter

You happen to be the second guy on this thread that condemned what that young man did.

ligopedro:
Dunno about anyone but it works for me and i got 2 boyz ..

you need to change that mindset.
Sex before marriage isnt the reason why you had kids

we do it so as to be sure we re married to a woman
nobody takes dat risk again dear
cus i dnt want to stay uptil 10 years looking 4 fruit of de womb.

Mprex:
you need to change that mindset.
Sex before marriage isnt the reason why you had kids

NOTED : I WILL CHANGE MY MINDSET BUT MAYBE IN MY NEXT LIFE ...

I think its the new trend now!
Some even say the lady must get pregnant before they marry just to make sure the lady is fertile. Weird, isnt it?

Well, I believe in whatever you believe works for you. The person you should learn to please is you and no one else.. Follow your mind and dont let anyone deceive you into the "I cant marry who I haven't bedded" crappy shit!... sleeping with you doesnt guarantee marriage

Ok my views;
Im wan check weda she sabi bleep or not, so he knows wah he will be going to(U know say 4 9ja divorce be like taboo). Nd too, if she tight or loose like loosed wrapper.