Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,194,466 members, 7,954,828 topics. Date: Saturday, 21 September 2024 at 10:20 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / I Need your Advice (25753 Views)
In Pains! Your advice needed / Please I Need Your Advice I Feel Like Killing My Husband / Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) ... (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (Reply) (Go Down)
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 12:44pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
A man who is too proud and never admits his mistakes and never apologises is a recipe for a horrible marriage and isnt ready to remain married. He should have remained single. In fact he still has a lot of growing up to do. The Op's husband needs to watch himself else that marriage breaks down. 2 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 12:52pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Sophyrocks: The Op too like many women married a proud man with the hopes that she could change him. |
Re: I Need your Advice by bukatyne(f): 12:53pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
pickabeau1: Everyone I told the story word for word said the man is NO LONGER interested in the marriage... As my hubby puts it... witches want to eat someone and she runs palmoil on her body. The husband is NOT INTERESTED in the marriage anymore. Two days ago, hubby and I had a little disagreement and he said 'I will sleep in the sitting room carrying his pillow and covering cloth' and I said fine, goodnight dear... A minute later... 'You are wicked o, you cannot even call me to come back'... I did not stand up and say 'my hubby is making empty threats' and locked the door after him to aid in his 'quest' to sleep in the sitting room; I did not gather his remaining stuffs and threw it out at him. IMHO, That husband is NOT INTERESTED in the marriage anymore... |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 12:56pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
bukatyne: What if your husband is always making these threats in the hope that you will beg him and one day you have enough and decide to call his bluff? |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 12:56pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: And that is where she has failed. How many times are we told as young women that people do not change after marriage? If his parents could not change him, who are you to change him? The husband on the other hand needs counselling on the proper mindset to have of marriage. If he wanted to be solo psychologically without answering to anyone else, he would have remained single. Marriage isnt by force o. |
Re: I Need your Advice by 5minsmadness: 12:57pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
chaircover:Madam chaircover I am not the husband. I know a couple going through the exact same issues cinon mentioned here and I know what was initially presented was the truth. The condom and womanizing part was a BIG LIE. I called her out severally on this thread to confirm if she was the one(as anonymously as possible) and she ignored me so I understood silence for consent. I was shocked when I saw the condom angle. Everybody knows 'oga' to be a no nonsense and very proud man; that is hos major fault, it isn't hidden. And trust me, I know the womanizers in my group , he is definitely not one of them. The true fact of the matter is in her original post. I can only decipher that she decided to make it more sensational cos she didn't get the response she wanted initially. I even brought the thread to oga's attention andhe was beyond pissed, just that he isn't the Nairaland type. It is just a pity that most women here expect men to be cheats if not it won't sweet them. Am not talking again as Av been told to let it rest but lies are lies and painting someone bad and hiding the truth so as to get pity is the lowest of the low. 4 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by 5minsmadness: 1:00pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:Abeg go siddon. She didn't see all of this before she married him? Are you sure it wasn't the pride and confidence that follows it that endeared her to him in the first place? 2 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by bukatyne(f): 1:04pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: I will not beg (I did not) and I will not lock him out either... And I know that he will never sleep in the sitting room (except it is something really terrible (God forbid)), three steps and he will come back to the room. If I had locked the door that night, I am pretty sure it would have escalated beyond him coming back immediately and accusing me of wickedness and terrorism I have no qualms with Oga calling her bluff... Giving her Tfare and telling her 'I must not meet you here bla bla' suffices Collecting her keys and involving the gateman is a no no 1 Like |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 1:07pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Sophyrocks: They both need counseling. I am a little skeptical about the cheating part because that would have been the first thing she would have mentioned and thats a bigger issue than calling her bluff. He needs to let go of cheating if indeed cheating is the issue, he also needs to keep his ego at the door when he gets home, a man is the head not just for pride but for responsibility, if any disagreement gets to the point of name calling then the head has failed, a man should be able to do his best to keep his home at peace. Carrying pride like some achievement won't give him any peace but strife. The woman needs to learn what is important. Cheating is unacceptable and making empty threats is not the way forward. Sadly if she knew who she was marrying before she married then change cannot be automatic or achieved through threats. Either she lives with that choice, she ignores it or she walks away. People hardly change until they want to or decide too. Even God with all the powers God had to create the world, mountains and hills can't force a man to change, God will give you the choice and chance to change then leave you to your fate. I don't know where our sisters get the notion that they are stronger than God 1 Like |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 1:09pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
bukatyne: Well as his friend and his wife have said here oga is a proud maybe rude man. And as the friend said she knew before she married him so threatening him to change clearly wont work am sure you are not proud like oga here lol |
Re: I Need your Advice by bukatyne(f): 1:11pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
aisha2: LOL She might known who she married anyways I hope they work it out anyways 1 Like |
Re: I Need your Advice by pickabeau1: 1:14pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
bukatyne: Not sure there was a question for me here Are u saying the man was waiting for an opportunity and that the woman is innocent of her acidic mouth |
Re: I Need your Advice by bukatyne(f): 1:18pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
pickabeau1: They both have acidic mouth so I wonder why the focus on that of the wife 3 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 1:24pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
5minsmadness: Yes she married you. But that doeesnt mean you must continue with what will destroy your marriage. If you are the man in question, you are now married. Work on your marriage. Put your pride aside. Pride they say causes a fall. You dnt want a fall in your marriage. If you know you cannot put your pride aside and apologise when wrong, you should have remained single. thats the bitter truth. Pride kills marriages. Make changes for the good of your marriage. work on yourself. Learn to accept wrong and apologise. 5 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by pickabeau1: 1:29pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
bukatyne: So what was your point exactly |
Re: I Need your Advice by bukatyne(f): 1:54pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
pickabeau1: It is actually your point I don't get If the both of them have acidic mouth, why should the husband move out for her? It is not like if he marries another wife, his acidic mouth and pride will not ruin it. Or does the husband have the 'right' to an acidic mouth and the wife does not? 4 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by pickabeau1: 1:58pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
bukatyne: Since we don't get each other's points It's all good |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 3:09pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Take a break ...show some respect to the men and women staking their lives in the fight against BH https://www.nairaland.com/2127885/thread-dedicated-nigerian-service-men#30389335 |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 3:28pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
cionon:...galfriend, its not stated the things he does that put you off so apprioprate advice can be given .. however, do not move an inch from your home. Never threaten a man if you don 't mean to walk the talk..humble yourself, apologise to him and start work on yourself, the things he raised ...you may have been judgemental on your presentation the things you raised about him...that matters alot. You know the man you are married to, you should know the way to soften his heart, if there are things you must help him to grow with or out of, correct him in love in a relaxed and playful way,once done, don 't dwell on it...trust me, men listen...its just an adjustment period for you both, whatever is stressing you is not more important than your man or you peace of mind 1 Like |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 3:31pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
cionon:It's never too late to start afresh. Since you know you're married to a person who repulses you, why not move into your father's house where you can have peace of mind and no disrespect whatsoever? 2 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 3:35pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
bluedaze:Not every man is a pansy. Mr. Cionon, certainly isn't a pansy. |
Re: I Need your Advice by Lepetitechic(f): 5:11pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Nonso23: @bolded please do unto others as you want done to you, if it was reversed I bet you'd be the first to scream blue murder! 1 Like |
Re: I Need your Advice by rolled: 5:30pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Cionon cionon cionon You need a job Try to get one ASAP 1 Like |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 5:42pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
Re: I Need your Advice by Bosch10(m): 5:53pm On Feb 03, 2015 |
cionon:u shuldnt have argued with ur husband at all to the extent of you telling him that u are no more interested.at least,he is ur husband(ur head).when some people tend to b difficult to live with,our attitude can pacify things.allow him to come back 4rm work and beg him that u dont mean what u said,and promise to change.if he still says that u shuld go,then inform his family members and they will resolve it 4 u.Lastly whenever u are angry,mimd what u say.A wife told her husband that he will poison his husband when she was angry,did u know that even though the family of the man begged on behalf of d wife,the man never ate 4rm his wife again.the words we say when we are angry can increase or stop other pples anger.A SOFT ANGER TURNETH AWAY WRATH 2 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 12:08pm On Feb 04, 2015 |
Thanks to you all for the advice. Learnt one or two from my actions and your advice worked. Working on myself to be a better wife now and hope he changes. |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 4:12pm On Feb 25, 2015 |
Hmm. |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 3:57pm On May 01, 2015 |
Re: I Need your Advice by Inosenduatall: 12:46am On May 02, 2015 |
Liar... but it's all good sha. The truth lies in your original post. The rest are all lies to solicit pity. I know people like you and it disgusts me. What will you use the pity for? Rubbish |
Re: I Need your Advice by younghartz(m): 3:41pm On May 02, 2015 |
When you put a toad in a pot of water and you start boiling the water at 45•c the toad adjust its body to the temp of the water at 100•c it won't be able to adjust anymore, now it tries to jump out bt d strength isn't there anymore,it dies .... Assuming it used its strength to jump out the pot instead of using it to adjust to the temp..it would have bn alive.... Moral: don't think things will get better along the line, rather pack your things and leave.....if he really loves you he won't let you leave. Never beg for love in a relationship or marriage if not you will forever beg just to maintain it... 2 Likes |
Re: I Need your Advice by bukatyne(f): 7:01pm On May 02, 2015 |
@OP: Hope all is well? |
Re: I Need your Advice by Nobody: 12:03pm On May 05, 2015 |
madam, madam , madam!!!" my fiancee out of pride threw my ring at me and expected me the husband to be to call and apologise to her but the situation now is worst at her end. I can't take her again go beg your husband whether you're right or not. make devil no deceive you say men plenty. |
(1) (2) (3) ... (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (Reply)
Three-year-old Falls Into Well While Playing With Friends (photo) / "I Have Been Dreaming Of My Mother Recently" - Man Who Lost His Mum Needs Help / Man Refuses To Take Child To Hospital After Blood Flowed To Her Head.See Why.PIC
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 75 |