₦airaland Forum

wristwatch:
This happens to a senior colleague of mine whom we are close friend. He has been dating his girlfriend for 3 years and their wedding is coming up in 2 months time.

At the beginning of the relationship, He ask if her girlfriend is keeping any secret which she said NO even to the point that he said he is AS and want to know if she is AA which she is confirm YES.

However, any time he raise the issue of medical check up, she feels reluctant and atimes get angry as why he can't put trust in her.

After much pestering she agreed to go with him and when the result came out, it was discovered she is AS. He confronted her on why she lied from the onset and she confessed she can't afford to loose him.

My friend is so confused and can't think straight knowing the consequences will be huge if they get married.

Should he quit the wedding?

Lala247:
Dont think he should quit ...
Loads of married couple have the AS trait. But not all have sickle cell (ss) children ..
But the chances are higher badically ..


If he had AS n the girl is SS then quit .. Cuz dat is guaranteed to affect any children they might have in future ..

wristwatch:
My friend is analysing it too as d doctor mentioned same thing but He said the chances for sickle cell anaemia children is high.

ronald4lif:
Giving that she lied she's AA she can't be trusted anymore. Anyone who lies with such a sensitive issue probably has more lies she's conceiving.

He has the option of quiting the marriage on the fundamental grounds of lies and deceit and that is rightly so too. What more lies has she told him? She must come clean with every important issue that may make or mar the marriage in the possible future.

Alternatively, he can still proceed with the marriage if he's strongly convinced she's the one. They can screen the foetus at the early stages of each pregnancy to determine it genotype. Once it's confirmed it is an SS carrier then a D&C should be carried out.

It all depends on the level of commitment of the both of them and two people who truly want to be together even when the odds are against them to overcome such travails.

falconey:
OP within 2 months I can tell if the girl I'm dating is a AS/SS or not, unless is a long distance relationship .

The dude is not conscious, they should seek for medical advice.

Snowangel4:
Is better they separate now or else the children will suffer and you know what that means "no happiness".

Lala247:
Yh but not as high ad As n Ss
My friends mum is Ss and her dad As 4 kids all are As so it depends ..

tosyne2much:
There's nothing to worry about

In some cases, the protocol of LOVE can be bypassed and they should go their separate ways

ronald4lif:
Giving that she lied she's AA she can't be trusted anymore. Anyone who lies with such a sensitive issue probably has more lies she's conceiving.

He has the option of quiting the marriage on the fundamental grounds of lies and deceit and that is rightly so too. What more lies has she told him? She must come clean with every important issue that may make or mar the marriage in the possible future.

Alternatively, he can still proceed with the marriage if he's strongly convinced she's the one. They can screen the foetus at the early stages of each pregnancy to determine it genotype. [/b]Once it's confirmed it is an SS carrier then a D&C should be carried out. [b]

It all depends on the level of commitment of the both of them and two people who truly want to be together even when the odds are against them to overcome such travails.

wristwatch:
They are lucky ooo.

DDeliverer:
But some girls can be very foolish o...

Your friend should quit..Now!!! Love might be 'sharking' them at the moment but the pain associated with having an SS child is terrible (infact, terrible is a mild way of putting it)..

buygala:
This genotype issue has already been overflogged on this forum


Before people creat threads, they should make use of the search bar on this forum. ... it isn't there as a cosmetic decoration

That said....

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN


IF YOUR GENOTYPE IS 'AS', RUN AS FAR AS POSSIBLE FROM TRYING TO PROCREATE WITH SOMEONE WITH THE SAME GENOTYPE
...THE RISK AND PERMUTATION JUST ISN'T WORTH IT....


IF YOU ARE IN DOUBT, TAKE TIME TO LISTEN TO THE HIDEOUS EXPERIENCES OF PARENTS WHO HAVE SS KIDS

ABOUT THE GIRL'S LIES...


EVERYONE LIES FOR ONE REASON OR THE OTHER... NO BIGGIE ... IN THIS CASE, SHE LIED TO PRESERVE THE STATUS QUO... Husband dey very scarce these days... So when she apparently found one, do you honestly expect her to throw him away without a fight? ... If the dude was in her shoes, can he honestly tell himself that he would have voluntarily told the truth?

wristwatch:
Medical advice will only say they should not get married. Lol are u sure u can know who is AS? What are their symptoms?

GhostProtocol:
A friend of mine lost her 11 year old to SS.

Don't do it!!

The pain they'd feel now would be much more short lived, as compared to the agony they'd feel, losing their kids at early ages.

I think in my next serious relationship, we'd have to do tests like 3 months in.

falconey:
male AS/SS is stronger you may not notice especially AS.

But female AS/SS is very clear to know she will always complain of severe HEADACHE,WEAKNESS. Once or twice a week, This two symptoms are the most obvious.

runzlord:
seriously? whats there to be confused about. she loves him and its evident. should he naw quit the weeding and start looking for who would love him again, if u ask me, thats long job

Lala247:
Yh thats what saying

He might leave her n marry AA n have children with disability u never know ..

buygala:
Dear Sir,


If it was your sister who married so 'sensibly' for love, how many D&Cs would you consider enough, before you will advice her to call the marriage quits? or would you advice her to continue flushing zygotes, hoping for an 'As' pikin, until she ends up womb-damaged?

ronald4lif:
Baba, my submission was on two phase. Either he quits not only because of the genotype variance but also on the grounds of deceit. Or he goes ahead with his wedding plans and considers D&C should the need arises.

While it is true that the stress of a D&C is not worth it and it's also not morally right, and I won't encourage a sister of mine to tow such path but I also am not sure if she hasn't had one before. As I don't have the right to question her private life. Same could also be the case of this said girl in the write up.

The rate at which D&C is on the increase is alarming every year but we hope to wish it away. What guarantee does any guy have that their potential wifey hasn't have one?.

buygala:
You still haven't answered my question. ..


How many D&Cs would you advice your sister to have, while waiting and gambling on the possibility of an AA or AS child?

A direct answer will be very much appreciated

ronald4lif:
Well, based on my limited knowledge of biology and genotype studies there's only one out of four chance of birthing an SS baby by AS parent.

The chance of birthing an SS baby by an AS and AS genotype couple is about 25%. Even though risky as it is but not as same as when either parent is an SS.

Having said this, if a sister should have one D&C out of 4 trials then I don't see it as a big deal or something to lose sleep about.