₦airaland Forum

DollyParton1:
That definition is flawed. A woman's success shouldn't depend on her marital status. Some women do not intend to get married. And as you know, success is relative. How will you term an unmarried woman unsuccessful if getting married or raising kids was never in her aim or purpose.
So you mean to say your manhood depends on only money? That's shallow!!!

The problem with men is that they wanna control their wives. Why will you wanna control your fellow human being? You want to determine your wife's behaviour, where she goes, who she rolls with and all. Its ok if you do that when u sense she is keeping a bad company or something. But can she do that to you too? Y'all just want a robot or something. You need to realize that the hunan race has evolved.

Respect is not a one sided thing, it should be reciprocal.

PiperAlpha:
Exactly like me mum too. Infact, my mum use to call girls of this generation "indomie girls", that most of them cannot even pound yam. I have heard from a woman before who mentioned that she cannot pound yam for her husband that If he does not want to eat pondo yam, then he would have to find someone who will pound the yam for him. I really envy my mum, despite being very successful still maintains her humility, cooks very delicious meals and has been an epitome of a virtuous woman.

Rapmoney:
Sincerely speaking, my Nigerian brothers are falling my hands big time!!!

Often times, I hear people (including the male folks!) Saying 'young women that are successful in their respective careers and probably drive cars are no-go area!' That's a huge sign of inferiority complex and an exhibition of shallow mentality!

Is it really an exclusive right for men only to be successful and own cars? Why do we have young women schooling or learning a trade? Is it not to be successful in their chosen careers? Do we expect these women to subject themselves to lack and poverty?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive under wrong assumptions! This clearly shows a poor mentality of the male folks!!!

Nigerian guys need to live above this poor mentality and accept the fact that becoming successful is not an exclusive right of the male folks...success is all encompassing and can be attained by anyone, irrespective of gender!

Please, feel free to share your views.

Peace!

Tallesty1:
Sorry but you conclude like a fool. Where did I mention women in my comment? I said that I am better than them(You and your likes who think that whoever that doesn't want the type of woman you like has inferiority complex).


Who's senseless here? There are 36 states in this country, I doubt if you have been to 8 of them yet you are spewing this trash about Nigerian men. What do you know about them?

Talking about inferiority complex, is it we that know what we want that are inferior or you and your likes that are imitating the westerners? If we all black should become like the whites then who will be like the blacks?

Grow up first, marry a wife then come and tell us from your experience.

Hopefully you will make sense.

Tallesty1:
Sorry but you conclude like a fool. Where did I mention women in my comment? I said that I am better than them(You and your likes who think that whoever that doesn't want the type of woman you like has inferiority complex).


Who's senseless here? There are 36 states in this country, I doubt if you have been to 8 of them yet you are spewing this trash about Nigerian men. What do you know about them?

Talking about inferiority complex, is it we that know what we want that are inferior or you and your likes that are imitating the westerners? If we all black should become like the whites then who will be like the blacks?

Grow up first, marry a wife then come and tell us from your experience.

Hopefully you will make sense.

Unluvable:
The funny thing is while you guys are here sharing opinions, life is happening on the outside.
All the working comfortable guys I know are either toasting, dating or married to women who are also comfortable in terms of cash flow. Recently, a girl was lamenting of how she missed an opportunity to date a cool guy she met because of her social status (he's very comfortable and resides on the island while she earns average income and resides on the mainland), the dude also want a big chic so they build a dynasty..hehehe

After all said and done, ladies please do what pleases you and makes you happy, if it's being president of world bank, then go for it! In the world of about 7 billion people, you'll find your niche. You don't need 99.9% of the world population of men attracted to you, you just need one man loving you and your sucess. Also, build character along with career, because that's what makes one successful as a human being.

I can't be bothered if 'Nigerian men' don't like 'successful' women because I don't like anybody, be it man or woman who doesn't like success

Rapmoney:
I knew you would come up with this! This is another fallacy!!! That only women who are successful mothers and wife are truly successful! You cannot outrule the financial aspect...a woman that cannot take care of her children if the man is not capable to do that due to circumstances cannot be regarded as a successful mother or wife. In essence, money matters a lot!

moHot:
it's frustrating when a successful woman is married to or dating a man who is not as successful as she is, because the things she do with the purest intentions will be misinterpreted and that's because of the notion most men hold about rich women.

It's not easy and what makes it more difficult is the inferiority complex of some of the men.

HOW TO EXCEL IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP AS A SUCCESSFUL WOMAN
1)Your 'submissiveness' has to be way more than the woman who is not as successful as her man
2)you have to let and make him be in charge ....make him feel he is in control. (even if he is not) Trust me it works, he has to have a feeling that he can still be head even with all ur wealth
3) you have to know you can't talk to your man the way an average woman would, you can't even say somethings when you are angry; any other woman can be rude to her man and get away with it but a rich woman have to be careful because your fat bank account will be blamed to be responsible for your rudeness .

Even the man who can't control or earn the respect of a woman he feeds will want the woman who can feed herself respect him and surrender herself to be controlled .?

Most times its not about the rich / poor woman respecting you, it's about you earning that respect by being THE MAN.

Rapmoney:
Sincerely speaking, my Nigerian brothers are falling my hands big time!!!

Often times, I hear people (including the male folks!) Saying 'young women that are successful in their respective careers and probably drive cars are no-go area!' That's a huge sign of inferiority complex and an exhibition of shallow mentality!

Is it really an exclusive right for men only to be successful and own cars? Why do we have young women schooling or learning a trade? Is it not to be successful in their chosen careers? Do we expect these women to subject themselves to lack and poverty?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive under wrong assumptions! This clearly shows a poor mentality of the male folks!!!

Nigerian guys need to live above this poor mentality and accept the fact that becoming successful is not an exclusive right of the male folks...success is all encompassing and can be attained by anyone, irrespective of gender!

Please, feel free to share your views.

Peace!

Rapmoney:
This is one dumb stuff! People just feel all successful women are disrespectful and not submissive!!!

cococandy:
I lost a few brain cells reading this poo. So punishing oneself taking public transport, begging for lifts everywhere when you can afford a car is a sign of humility? And that's something that a man with functioning brain finds attractive?

Who did this to you people?
Like the most retardedd shyt I've ever heard in my life.

Wait she even needs a man's consent to buy a car with her own money.

I feel like I get stupider every second I spend on nairaland because here's like the den for propagating the most stupid things ever spouted in the history of mankind and maybe if one is not careful this foolishness might be contagious.

Vickybee:
Beyonce, Adichie, Hilary Clinton etc share my view and they have a happy marriage than the so-called non feminists.

Jagabanthelion:
U ignored the first two scenarios and capitalized on the third abi? Take your feminism elsewhere miss. U can get a visa and fly out to where u will meet your likes.This is Nigeria and that is reality. They are happily married and she is now happier at work. wheneva I visit banks,I see this "marry me please" look on the faces of these female career bankers who 'forgot' to get married while chasing money and promotions. If only they knew how their affluent lifestyles scare men away. Ask Oprah winfrey your role model why with all her billions,she has no husband or children,only dogs and cats.I hope u marry a lawyer,so once u start ur feminist madness,he will know how best to get divorce papers.

Jagabanthelion:
U ignored the first two scenarios and capitalized on the third abi? Take your feminism elsewhere miss. U can get a visa and fly out to where u will meet your likes.This is Nigeria and that is reality. They are happily married and she is now happier at work. wheneva I visit banks,I see this "marry me please" look on the faces of these female career bankers who 'forgot' to get married while chasing money and promotions. If only they knew how their affluent lifestyles scare men away. Ask Oprah winfrey your role model why with all her billions,she has no husband or children,only dogs and cats.I hope u marry a lawyer,so once u start ur feminist madness,he will know how best to get divorce papers.

KingSango:
Sometimes roles get reversed when women start to out earn men. Women who earn more than most men may start to view men with less of an attraction because traditionally men are expected to be the providers. Men do encounter the snub from some women who have more materially than the men seeking their attention. Its like a poor farm boy who falls for a princess he has very little if anything to offer her. Women routinely dump men who earn less for men who earn more. So some male insecurity is rooted in harsh reality either from experience, or someone they know of or stories they've heard. While women becoming successful is applauded it does propose a challenge to our current social expectations. And thus it is the maturity of the people involved and not the sex which determines whether love will ensue or misunderstanding i.e discrimination against successful women or less successful men. For instance in China, where women have experienced great success due to office type work increased, while Chinese men have lost ground as technology replaces traditional manual labor jobs, as result of the disparity Chinese women are more independent and less interested in marriage. I know in the U.S where the White power structure placed African American women in corporate America over African American men, has had a huge impact on the social relationship of the two. Many African American women are successful yet unmarried in their late 30s and early 40s as they are unable to find suitable African American men for marriage. The America culture encourages women to stand up and flaunt being single like the Illuminati song by Beyounce, "All My Single Ladies". Social engineering young women to love being single, single mothers and shunning men who earn less or have less materially.

My opinion is that Western culture has penetrated Africa not the true rise of women. Western culture is covert social engineering of people of color to break up their families with bizarre lifestyles. Homosexuality, singleness, single motherhood, sex out of marriage, lust for perversion and all the things our Ancestors condemned. There were rich women in the time of our Ancestors and powerful ones as well but there was tradition to keep the balance between men and women. Western culture is not a tradition it is an invasion. The purpose of the invasion is to destroy the population disparity that exists between Whites and people of color. Such as African women including African diaspora have on average 3 to 4 babies in a lifetime. While White women average around 2 babies in their lifetime if they are lucky one doesn't die. There are power in numbers and this huge disparity is the motivation behind homosexuality, single motherhood and sexual perversion over marriage are being pushed upon African societies. Gender wars are also covertly instituted by Illuminati agendas as chaos only benefits Western nations whom wealth stratification is higher than developing African nations. I encourage the rise of women but it must include children as well. Women and children need men to protect them as they together are a vulnerable group. It makes no sense to have women with high salaries and children are starving or going unnutured. The rise of women in order for it to be true must include the betterment of children. We must resist Illuminati engineered gender wars that pit African men and women against each other whilst ignoring the betterment of family as a whole.

Love, Sango.

hopeforcharles:
You are quite unbiased in your post, me I am looking for a successful woman oh, if you know one send her my way, I have my own dough too so she can intimidate me.

Owliver:
and what's wrong with headship? Who says headship is about being a "control freak"? In every institution there must be a head? Like it or not. Just like you have you president, manager, governor, name them? Are you a xstian? If so then your bible gives room for such, same bible also says we should honor and respect our wives. oh I guess you want " total equality" abi? Ohyh tell me about how you toasted your husband, and also tell me how you knelt down to propose? Tell me how you showered him with gifts and flowers!!! Are you in Nigeria?

fagin1982:
My dear it's not about her pocket or the headship

When a man knows how to treat a woman ...No matter how reach she is ..She will play her role as the woman ..tho few exceptions

Gynacologist:
ur point?

edithokoye0096:
Disappointed in you

Rapmoney:
Thanks for the contribution! I love your post!

Rapmoney:
This is the same reason why I have tactfully avoided all ur threads and posts on NL!!! Sorry, I don't debate with people who take pleasure in insulting others. I will continue to ignore all ur threads and posts on NL! Whenever you see my threads, don't comment! Just move on! Bye bye!!!

craziebone:
i just googled "are british/american/german, etc men intimidated by 'successful' women?" and i found loads of online forum, blogs and websites from these countries where people are saying the same thing. And yet, some people want to think this is social construct.

The line "men are intimidated by 'successful' women" is an opium of feminists. More like a 'peacemaker' for them.

I have always said it that women who are so quick to use the "men are intimidated by successful women" and have never pull together the courage to ask out even the Beta or Gamma males not to talk of alpha males, who have so many options in younger and more beautiful females, should be the last ones to tell us anything about confidence.

bukatyne:
I doubt I have said anything was wrong with headship.

It depends on everyone's interpretation that was why I quoted the word.

@Bold:

Is there partial equality

In a relationship of just two people, a person doing one thing doesn't make them above the other person

Do you mean that if I proposed to my husband, I am superior? Can more than one person propose at a time?

Do you know some ladies proposed to their men? Are they superior?

Owliver:
judging from that single post you made that was all I could pick. You talked as though something is wrong with a man wanting headship. That was why I asked what's wrong with headship, or you want women to do the headship in a family? In a family setting you females are bad at it especially being a bread-winner. You can't even handle toasting a guy and getting a "NO" haha And yes two people should do things equally if you want "Equality" that term brings about competition which brings about rivalry which brings problem in a home. unless you have a different meaning to that term pls share let me know. I ask again... Are you in Nigeria?

bukatyne:
I am not in Nigeria,

I am in Lagos

You judged from a 'single' post? Did you read the post I quoted? Did you see the genesis of the conversation? Please try to do that.

Equality = competition? No idea

Some obvious 'unequal' people e.g. elder and younger ones still compete.

Owliver:
sorry. I read all the pages during midnight and I was right about what I said. am happy you are in lagos at least I know you know deep down the OP is wrong and damn wrong. I won't even argue the topic with you cos if your in lagos as stated then same naija female mentality is in you. Keep denying. In your vie for equality in a marriage setting you are bound to compete with your husband to meet up. Same right, same say, nobody is the head, no superior? I can't recall seeing where a ship has two captains. And yes unequal but depending on the environment. What do you expect? We talking about family. I have said enough "Lagos woman