₦airaland Forum

Dhurmynick:
https://www.standardmedia.co.ke/sdemedia/sdeimages/pulse/moneylove2.jpg

The opprobrium is an act of selfishness from a
certain class of women, mostly the educated
and troublesome unmarried lawyers and those
with feminist inclinations. The future of
marriage is now pegged on unbridled
consumerism and an unprecedented worship
of crass materialism by women.
A friend lamented recently on Facebook:
“Unlike days of yore, this Matrimonial Property
Bill 2013 is indicative of how latter day
marriages are defined: anticipating separation,
divorce, cash dividends, property settlements
et al. Sad.”
And one Ochieng Vincent aptly tweeted:
“Walking away from a marriage was never an
option during our parents’ time. That was
their winning formula.”

It escapes me. When it is the cash or the
property of men, women are very vociferous for
a 50-50 sharing arrangement in the event of
the marriage going south. Curiously when it is
the woman who has accumulated the wealth
and ended up with a stay-at-home hubby, the
rule book has to be revised.

These double standards are what the Bill is
trying to address and at least save men from
a generation of women who love men who are
tender with their legal tender.
Money has afforded women power to be
promiscuous, fool around and behave like men
at their worst when loaded.

This materialistic approach to relationships is
the bane of modern marriages. Women want
the best of both worlds. Keep their money,
while recklessly raiding the bed mate’s
account.

Women have the arcane ability to be shrewdly
generous and scarily selfish simultaneously.
A woman can burn a man’s quid with a
smack of self-righteous satisfaction. But for a
man to use a woman’s money, he must
swallow his ego, one that is normally the
size of a small planet.
When it comes to flaunting power, nothing like
Eve with cash and a title reminds Adam what
a tiny nimble he is in the food chain. Many
women still subscribe to 20th century dictum
that a man’s mullah is for ‘us’ but her purse
strings are hers alone.
Just why they were on cloud nine in the event
of a divorce, they could milk half the empire
you bruised your butt on the grindstone to
build.
While their contribution as wives is
immeasurable, we want to safeguard
individuals (male and female) who might want
to take advantage of any slight to laugh their
way to ‘benki mashinane.’
In families where the wife who is breadwinner,
the hubby dies faster than the national
mortality age dictates.

I know many middle-aged men who are
psychologically dodo and alienated from their
families because they failed to provide. They
are a relief to the woman the sooner they’re
planted Six Feet under via natural attrition or
otherwise. The Amended Marriage Bill is the
best 50th anniversary of Kenyan independence
gift for God fearing, hardworking men. This
way you only pay the spouse what is
proportionate to her contribution.

Both parties win. This will also safeguard
men, unlike in the West where women wield
unhealthy amounts of power and men are just
there to be seen, and nor heard.

SOURCE?

Happiness is not money, happiness is within.

Meanwhile, money could only bring about peripheral and momentary happiness. It doesn't necessarily guarantee inner and perpetual happiness.

UjSizzle:
That's why i spoke about mindset. There are people who believe their happiness to tied to another person(men and women alike). It doesn't have to be ok, but it is what it is.

lol everybody wants to be happy not only ladies, what happened to the "gender equality thing" that ladies are always shouting about?......if you still watch angelina jolie's movies and she makes minimum of. $5m per movie she acts, people like oprah winfrey, lupita nyongo, chimamanda adichie. And u are saying you want happiness? Then get happiness yourself, don't depend on any man to give you happiness....... For cryin out loud if any girl needs money let her ask God or her father period, I won't carry anybodies burden except my wife's..mm.nigera is too hard to start catering for someone.....person neva chop finish, e con carry anoda person join, if I hear

I totally disagree with the OP, this topic is something we witness on a daily basis , a girl joins facebook because she thinks a rich man will spot her, she goes to busy places simply becos she feels that's where rich guys are, let me ask you is that how to chase happiness ? Hell no, I call it greed n 90% of Nigerian girls are guilty of this which is not something you should be proud of.

Everybody chases the source of their happiness, so therefore you can't completely resolve that our girls are gold diggers. How different are Nigeria girls from other girls? Everybody thrives for things that make them happy, and you can't substitute your happiness for any other thing not while you are very conscious. We live a life for others, but it wouldn't be a thing of regret if we do what pleases us though most people would disapprove.

Mynd44:
While I agree that what the OP is right and the mentality is that they are chasing, that same mentality has been known to be a colossal failure and has made Nigerian women to be seen as money hungry skanks. Look if you want to chase money why not do it the right way?

Go get a job, get a life and also get a new name while at it. Get money on your terms, get a job to do ask your FATHER for money and stop being a freaking parasite who depends on others for money and livelihood. The same way a man works for money, a woman can also work for it and guess what, she can then be happy.

If you date people or have sex with people for money, you are a what? A LOVE PEDDLER. You might as well get a room in a brothel and wait for customers or share your numbers in hotels around you. At least we know you take it as a job and not hide behind the lie that you want to be comfortable

GBAM!!

UjSizzle:
Figured the title would get your attention This is really more of my opinion than some fact, so I'm hoping we'll be able to discuss 'intelligently'. I'll keep this straight and simple though , so you don't need to worry about reading an epistle.

I'm a strong advocate for understanding why people act the way they do because it is truly the only way to tolerate and deal with them. So lets discuss the over flogged topic of Nigerian women and their supposed love of money .

Why are 'Nigerian women' money conscious?
Really the answer isn't far fetched: They are simply pursuing happiness.

Being happy is really the summary of all a woman wants, but happiness as we know is subject to individuals; what makes A happy maybe different from what makes B happy.

Now while some may say that a woman should be happy with a man who loves her, we might want to ask ourselves: Is love really enough? Can you trust an emotion that can be so easily extinguished just as quickly as it was sparked?
Money is the next best thing after love. Seriously, lets not deceive ourselves here, money makes the world go round. And who says it can't buy you happiness?
To people who are superficial(and that's not a crime), money is happiness. Even to the less superficial ones, it does have the same effect.

Now men, you really didn't think i was going to spare you, did you?
If you believe Nigerian women are gold diggers, it is because consciously, unconsciously or subconsciously you made them so.
I was having a discussion with a friend some months back, and she said she couldn't marry an Igbo man who grew up in Anambra(sorry my brothers). She had a really good reason for that if i may say. Men who go after money with such tenacity believe that it is the only way to please their woman. I don't know who taught you that you could substitute yourself with your wealth, but so far it's worked, and now that the women are following what will supposedly please them(make them happy) you complain. Aren't you the most confused beings alive? We'll leave your confusion for another discussion.

So in essence, every woman wants happiness. Some find it in self fulfilment, others find it in love, and yet others find it in materiality.
You can't really blame a person for what they believe will keep them happy, the best you can do is change their mindset. It is really about orientation, what they have been led to believe. Some believe their happiness is tied to someone(a man or woman) or something(possibly the good things of life that only money can buy), while others believe happiness comes from within. I say to each man his own after all there are those who have trusted in love and your potentials and yet nothing good had come of it that they gradually start to resent you. You really can't blame a person for wanting substance, can you?

If men really believe there is more to them than their money(for the few who have some faith in themselves) then it is time to start showing these women those hidden treasures that can make them happy. Until you can successfully do that, please chase after your money and let the women chase after you, and stop complaining

I will want to agree with you to some extent having got a personal experience while I was dating one gal. During the time we were dating, it happened that I was the only one in my family who has a good job and carried most of the bills incurred in the house. For this reason, she felt I may not be able to meet up all her demands by the time we get married because I will be too busy attending to my brothers and sisters needs. I try hard to let her understand that things will definitely not continue the same way it was. She insisted, she said she was leaving. And right as am commenting, everything is falling in place for my family already. All those who she thought could not fend for themselves are now doing better and have all moved to their various apartments, living happily with their family without a dime of support from me. So where am driving to is that, we all av different perspective not only the way we view what brings us happiness but what life itself is all abt.

Maybe Nigerian men also aren't helping by seeing potential ladies as being materialistic. It's more like they expect it from them and they want them to be so that they can feel justified when they eventually have carnal knowledge of such lady.
For instance, giving a ride to a lady. A man will instantly opt to offer to buy the lady a meal, if she didn't refuse, the man will afterward feel he has earned the avenue to receive her number.
The guy probably having called her on some numbers of occasion and also probably sent her recharge cards, will now ask her out again, this time to go for the proverbial kill.
And should the lady refuse their sexual advance, they will start crying foul.
I think if guys should stop this stereotypical acts against women, maybe we might see less of 'gold digging'.

felixuzuh:
In my own opinion, a woman is a gold digger, when she's only interested in benefiting and not giving anything in return. But a man who falls mugu to a woman isn't a real man. A real man should know when he's nothing but an ATM machine.

They give pusy in return,their useless overused pusys...b!tches everywhere.

Chasing happiness u say? Then y is it dat there are women i kn, who hv made some real cash on their own, wt out a man in their life are not always happy These ur write up is jus an excuse 2 greed and laziness. All these crave for materialism by d women folks should not be condole in any guise.

Seychelle:
Thumbz up@poster,u re on point, jxt lyk my saying goes"a man can only b succesful wen he makes more money dan a woman can spend"
money z gud en sweet
#jxt passing shaaa....#

dumbass

InvertedHammer:
/
I have never heard that ladies take money from their men under gun point. If you cannot afford what she is into, then find someone whose taste is affordable. If what she is doing is intolerable, time will catch up with her. Otherwise, guys should hang their coats where they can reach them.
A guy is only cute and "happening" when he is in the university living off of his parents. Once he graduates, all those shallow attributes go out of the window if he has no positive cash flow. That's when the reality of life sets in. The problem is that some guys do not know when and how to do the much needed transition to manhood. They live under their parents after graduation and spend most of their time on social media blaming ladies for their own laziness.
A well rounded girl will not settle for a loser. Such guys keep hoping they get wealthy in-laws who will give them easy ride. Surprisingly, they will never agree to their sisters marrying losers like themselves.



Better soup, na money kill am. A big shout out to the one and only Oshiomhole. If Oshiomhole's marriage doesn't motivate every guy, I don't know what could.
/

Loolz! YOU JUST SUMMARISED THE TRUTH! Gbam!

80percent of Nigerian men are not rich and can't even boast of copper! So WHAT GOLD EXACTLY ARE THE WOMEN DIGGING? Lol

Damn u seriously lack objectivity.2 wrongs do not make a right.Thnk God there are Nigerians that see beyond ur materialty and it is in this same country that wives & take note I said wives not one night stands like Simbiat,Mrs igbinedion exist.Remember true happiness comes from peace of mind and not materialty.

i deh come back...

oSHA RO MONDAY.

Mynd44:
While I agree that what the OP is right and the mentality is that they are chasing, that same mentality has been known to be a colossal failure and has made Nigerian women to be seen as money hungry skanks. Look if you want to chase money why not do it the right way?

Go get a job, get a life and also get a new name while at it. Get money on your terms, get a job to do ask your FATHER for money and stop being a freaking parasite who depends on others for money and livelihood. The same way a man works for money, a woman can also work for it and guess what, she can then be happy.

If you date people or have sex with people for money, you are a what? A LOVE PEDDLER. You might as well get a room in a brothel and wait for customers or share your numbers in hotels around you. At least we know you take it as a job and not hide behind the lie that you want to be comfortable

Best reply as far as i'm concerned! end of discussion!

These women don't get it! work and make ur own money!get some dignity!

I just feel like stoning someone 2 death. . . .. .

The gold diggers already found some thread that justifies their actions

UjSizzle:
Figured the title would get your attention This is really more of my opinion than some fact, so I'm hoping we'll be able to discuss 'intelligently'. I'll keep this straight and simple though , so you don't need to worry about reading an epistle.

I'm a strong advocate for understanding why people act the way they do because it is truly the only way to tolerate and deal with them. So lets discuss the over flogged topic of Nigerian women and their supposed love of money .

Why are 'Nigerian women' money conscious?
Really the answer isn't far fetched: They are simply pursuing happiness.

Being happy is really the summary of all a woman wants, but happiness as we know is subject to individuals; what makes A happy maybe different from what makes B happy.

Now while some may say that a woman should be happy with a man who loves her, we might want to ask ourselves: Is love really enough? Can you trust an emotion that can be so easily extinguished just as quickly as it was sparked?
Money is the next best thing after love. Seriously, lets not deceive ourselves here, money makes the world go round. And who says it can't buy you happiness?
To people who are superficial(and that's not a crime), money is happiness. Even to the less superficial ones, it does have the same effect.

Now men, you really didn't think i was going to spare you, did you?
If you believe Nigerian women are gold diggers, it is because consciously, unconsciously or subconsciously you made them so.
I was having a discussion with a friend some months back, and she said she couldn't marry an Igbo man who grew up in Anambra(sorry my brothers). She had a really good reason for that if i may say. Men who go after money with such tenacity believe that it is the only way to please their woman. I don't know who taught you that you could substitute yourself with your wealth, but so far it's worked, and now that the women are following what will supposedly please them(make them happy) you complain. Aren't you the most confused beings alive? We'll leave your confusion for another discussion.

So in essence, every woman wants happiness. Some find it in self fulfilment, others find it in love, and yet others find it in materiality.
You can't really blame a person for what they believe will keep them happy, the best you can do is change their mindset. It is really about orientation, what they have been led to believe. Some believe their happiness is tied to someone(a man or woman) or something(possibly the good things of life that only money can buy), while others believe happiness comes from within. I say to each man his own after all there are those who have trusted in love and your potentials and yet nothing good had come of it that they gradually start to resent you. You really can't blame a person for wanting substance, can you?

If men really believe there is more to them than their money(for the few who have some faith in themselves) then it is time to start showing these women those hidden treasures that can make them happy. Until you can successfully do that, please chase after your money and let the women chase after you, and stop complaining

there is a BIG difference between the pursuit of happiness and PURE GREED.. unfortunately i do not agree with your delusional rewashed logic.. most women are lazy and greedy. like it or not..no body wants to work hard but everyone wants to be rich......

your post don't make a sensible sense,realy obtuse and baseless.

Any woman who wants happiness should freaking get a job and make herself happy. I don't and will never depend on any man for money cos am not a gold digger. I work hard for my money and that makes me happy...

adorable29:
Loolz! YOU JUST SUMMARISED THE TRUTH! Gbam!

80percent of Nigerian men are not rich and can't even boast of copper! So WHAT GOLD EXACTLY ARE THE WOMEN DIGGING? Lol

Dahs why 95% of ladies are unmarried, kip diggin for Gold! Hope it doesnt take u years to find....#lazyassladies!

Pureheart91:
Dahs why 95% of ladies are unmarried, kip diggin for Gold! Hope it doesnt take u years to find....#lazyassladies!

lol

UjSizzle:
Some people are either too lazy to bother, or have never in their lives been instilled with the discipline to work....who know?

Lol I bet a woman who hustles to secure a 'big' man will pat herself on the back when she succeeds

While I agree with your post I still blame it on the government inability to provide basic amenities for people( man/ woman) to strive or rather high cost of living in the land when the job creation is very low to live up to the life which make people to look for quick way( mostly illegal) to make the money. What I'm trying to say is that the way some guys indulge in illegal activities like drug trafficking, yahoo yahoo, kidnapping to make quick cash that's how some ladies see gold digging as a way to escape from hardship... In real sense, it's dangerous to society that want upright and morally placed citizen.
In western world, a bitch is bitch no two ways about it but in Nigeria, a bitch will still be forming saint, going to church to deceive herself why? Because it's not really in her mind, situation make her so.

iykedare:
Sis,you can make money with your brain.
If you can't,you can make money with your body just like runx girls and pro$titutes.

I definitely want to make my own money, and I am. But just because I ask a guy for money every once in a while doesn't make me a gold digger neither does it make you broke.

The problem is that most men shy away from their responsibility and cover up their broke ass under the gold-digging-women guise.

princesa:
I definitely want to make my own money, and I am. But just because I ask a guy for money every once in a while doesn't make me a gold digger neither does it make you broke.

The problem is that most men shy away from their responsibility and cover up their broke ass under the gold-digging-women guise.

What are the responsibilities of a guy dating you ma'am?

jplay:
sharap dia n stop tryin 2 hrd. 2 mny ugly gurlz on dis site dey luk 4 validation includin op wit ha rubbish post

did u say ugly girls looking for validation?
D fact is that u are the silly, and useless one here.

Between, the op is right, it very common, you hear broke dude call ladies who are simply looking for what gives them joy or happiness gold digger,

it true ladies are suppose to work and earn a living if money gives them joy but that not withstanding, it their life hence they are at liberty to find happiness in their own way, no point terming them as gold digger.

charlesucheh:
don't let me think what i wouldn't want to. From your post, you sounded like a pro-golddigging activist. If your ways are like that, pls change or u just might end up like one of those gurls who get married to men tripple time their age just for the sole called HAPPINESS. NB: 90% of the truth comes from the poor.

The poor guys right? True, cos that's what they have to offer.

And I'm not pro-digging activist. Just angry that most guys hide under its guise.

Mynd44:
What are the responsibilities of a guy dating you ma'am?

If he's up and able he should know. There's the physical, moral, emotional and financial support he can render every now and then if he thinks himself my man.

I don't need to start listing them one by one for you. I'm not asking him to sell his properties for me, but I am asking him to give some money. That shouldn't be a cause for me to be labelled a gold digger.

princesa:
If he's up and able he should know. There's the physical, moral, emotional and financial support he can render every now and then if he thinks himself my man.

I don't need to start listing them one by one for you. I'm not asking him to sell his properties for me, but I am asking him to give some money. That shouldn't be a cause for me to be labelled a gold digger.

And what are your responsibilities?

post=20793803:
They are either gold diggers or use gold diggers' methods and tactics to pursue happiness.

"Don't you want a man who can spend on you?" is a common line I keep hearing from my aunts and cousins. Sorry, but that's gold digging. Can't convince me otherwise. One can make excuses and/or blame it on environment, conditions, etc., but let's call a spade a spade.

God will make u bigger, you are one of the few women I have seen here with a good sense of humor.

Mynd44:
While I agree that what the OP is right and the mentality is that they are chasing, that same mentality has been known to be a colossal failure and has made Nigerian women to be seen as money hungry skanks. Look if you want to chase money why not do it the right way?

Go get a job, get a life and also get a new name while at it. Get money on your terms, get a job to do ask your FATHER for money and stop being a freaking parasite who depends on others for money and livelihood. The same way a man works for money, a woman can also work for it and guess what, she can then be happy.

If you date people or have sex with people for money, you are a what? A LOVE PEDDLER. You might as well get a room in a brothel and wait for customers or share your numbers in hotels around you. At least we know you take it as a job and not hide behind the lie that you want to be comfortable

you have said it all sir, may your days be long. They are only justifying the reason for their greed and evil desire for materialism.

Kennedyiheme:
lol everybody wants to be happy not only ladies, what happened to the "gender equality thing" that ladies are always shouting about?......if you still watch angelina jolie's movies and she makes minimum of. $5m per movie she acts, people like oprah winfrey, lupita nyongo, chimamanda adichie. And u are saying you want happiness? Then get happiness yourself, don't depend on any man to give you happiness....... For cryin out loud if any girl needs money let her ask God or her father period, I won't carry anybodies burden except my wife's..mm.nigera is too hard to start catering for someone.....person neva chop finish, e con carry anoda person join, if I hear

lol I think I'm getting your point. But The problem here should be our individual perception.

Are you saying you can't spend on your girlfriend at all except she's your wife? I don't think a right thinking girl out there expects her boyfriend to buy her a house, you can spend on little little things to show that she's worthy of your money.

Or do you think Brad Pitt doesn't spend on Angelina because she earns that high? And here i was thinking its an Ego thing for the males. But obviously not the nigerian males!

Mynd44:
And what are your responsibilities?

Moral, physical, emotional and financial. Relationship to me is a two way thing