Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? - Romance (2)

Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? (4416 Views)

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by rudebouy(op): 3:53pm On Oct 17, 2015

umehmj:
marriage wasn't part of their plan so why waste our time here? the only reason your guy don't wanna marry her is because he probably has a serious girl and this other girl is just a side chick. guys just complicate things for themselves. and wait! you said the girl runs a beauty saloon and your guy met her when he was a broke ass nigga. your guy na gold digger! that explains why he is worried about breaking up from a girl he never discussed marriage with..... on a second thought your guy did discuss the future with that girl to get her money and into her pants. guy no dey tell us half baked story here.

Yes he was a gold digger. And he now wants to share the proceeds from the gold dug from the initial investor with the initial investor becos he still gat some conscience? He met her when she had one small shop now he wants upgrade her shop, as in get her a bigger shop with dapper equipments dat will attract richer clients. No be beta tin be dat?

No! He neva discussed marriage with her. He was only a cute broke guy dat lured her and she fell.

His aim is to ensure that he doesnt leave her the way he met her or leave her with nothing. Me thinks dats okay.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by missmary(f): 3:54pm On Oct 17, 2015

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by missmary(f): 3:55pm On Oct 17, 2015

He should Slap her and break up with her!....
Thank me Later! cool

Dear Op.. After she pours hot oil on your friend... Please come back and update this section! cool

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by jmoore(m): 4:00pm On Oct 17, 2015

They never discussed marriage, therefore she deserves no dime as compensation.

Why the shout about he fuc* her for two years? Sex involves both parties, therefore she is never a victim.

Smh

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by misspicy(f): 4:03pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
Seriously, I'd shove his money where the sun don't shine. Who needs charity? He doesn't wanna marry her, then bye. Where does he get off thinking she needs a pacifier? He needs to end it the normal way & not act like he's some irreplaceable somebody when he's not. The nerve of it all.

Lol,do you remember what i told u abt Nigerian men dis morning?
Hahahahahahahaha,its their culture

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by ojun50(m): 4:06pm On Oct 17, 2015

misspicy:
Mad fellows,everywhere

guys hv being wicked since i was born

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:11pm On Oct 17, 2015

misspicy:
Lol,do you remember what i told u abt Nigerian men dis morning?
Hahahahahahahaha,its their cupture

Wow. This is unbelievable to me that someone can think he's that important. Feeling phly. Like someone is gonna sweat him. Puhleeze. Nigga, bye. Anyway, if the girl in question has even one ounce of self-respect, she'll turn the money offer down & show him the door. Chapter closed. Next, call in the stand-ins! And life continues.

1 Like

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:35pm On Oct 17, 2015*

PunkyVeer:
Wow. This is unbelievable to me that someone can think he's that important. Feeling phly. Like someone is gonna sweat him. Puhleeze. Nigga, bye. Anyway, if the girl in question has even one ounce of self-respect, she'll turn the money offer down & show him the door. Chapter closed. Next, call in the stand-ins! And life continues.

Oh, please! Stop all these moral rants. You would gladly receive the money from the guy if it were you. At least, there is a saying that goes like this, money attracts women. Now go and get your pay from your ex. Bwahaha...

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:38pm On Oct 17, 2015

Pidggin:
I know you na , but it may not be the girl's fault, you know how guys deceive some girls. I wonder why he can't marry her, silly man.

The babe suppose wise up na cry

I would say he should marry her too, but love-less marriages are worse than the hottest part of hell grin

She should collect his money and free him grin

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:40pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
Seriously, I'd shove his money where the sun don't shine. Who needs charity? He doesn't wanna marry her, then bye. Where does he get off thinking she needs a pacifier? He needs to end it the normal way & not act like he's some irreplaceable somebody when he's not. The nerve of it all.

Calm down, lady. You better accept the dole or remain broke and at the same time sad. Hehehe...

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Pidggin(f): 4:48pm On Oct 17, 2015

MrsPhyno:
The babe suppose wise up na I would say he should marry her too, but love-less marriages are worse than the hottest part of hell

She should collect his money and free him

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by umehmj(m): 4:49pm On Oct 17, 2015

rudebouy:
Yes he was a gold digger. And he now wants to share the proceeds from the gold dug from the initial investor with the initial investor becos he still gat some conscience? He met her when she had one small shop now he wants upgrade her shop, as in get her a bigger shop with dapper equipments dat will attract richer clients. No be beta tin be dat?

No! He neva discussed marriage with her. He was only a cute broke guy dat lured her and she fell.

His aim is to ensure that he doesnt leave her the way he met her or leave her with nothing. Me thinks dats okay.

you seem to know much about this your friend. guy if you are the culprit better tell us so we can crucify you here.

1 Like

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:49pm On Oct 17, 2015

all4naija:
Oh, please! Stop all these moral rants. You would gladly receive the money from the guy if it were you. At least, there is a saying that goes like this, money attracts women. Now go and get your pay from your ex. Bwahaha...

Lol, you obviously don't know me. When I shut down, I SHUT ALL THE WAY DOWN. If you're an ex, you're as good as dead to me. I erase & banish every thought of you. Some of them I'm even having a hard time remembering their names, etc grin

That's how clinical I handle break ups. Eye develops amnesia, boo grin

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:55pm On Oct 17, 2015

all4naija:
Calm down, lady. You better accept the dole or remain broke and at the same time sad. Hehehe...

Sorry but guilt money would infuriate me. I'd rather be broke than take handouts from someone that doesn't want me. My pride would take over.

1 Like

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 4:55pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
Lol, you obviously don't know me. When I shut down, I SHUT ALL THE WAY DOWN. If you're an ex, you're as good as dead to me. I erase & banish every thought of you. Some of them I'm even having a hard time remembering their names, etc That's how clinical I handle break ups. Eye develops amnesia, boo

That means you just lost both ways. Lost the b o n e r and at the same time lost the luxury of having enough money to take good care of your needs. You are boasting to me, lady! Go and get your pay from your ex. I repeat, go and get your pay from your ex. Hehehe...

There would be no amnesia, insomnia or whatever but have a good time with the new find. You know what I mean.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 5:00pm On Oct 17, 2015

all4naija:
That means you just lost both ways. Lost the b o n e r and at the same time lost the luxury of having enough money to take good care of your needs. You are boasting to me, lady! Go and get your pay from your ex. I repeat, go and get your pay from your ex. Hehehe...

The would be no amnesia, insomnia or whatever but have a good time with the new find. You know what I mean.

I'd rather chew my right arm off.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by rudebouy(op): 5:01pm On Oct 17, 2015

umehmj:
you seem to know much about this your friend. guy if you are the culprit better tell us so we can crucify you here.

Hahaha!

I know say u go suspect me sha. But bros no be me oh. I still day find beta work oh and I neva ready to marry oh. Me still day believe God for breaktru oh.

Yes me and ma guy na 5 and 6 oh. I even day him house na day watch film as I day type dis tin so.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 5:01pm On Oct 17, 2015*

PunkyVeer:
Sorry but guilt money would infuriate me. I'd rather be broke than take handouts from someone that doesn't want me. My pride would take over.

Your pride gonna hurt you the most if you reject the money. I don't think there is any guilt in accepting what you worked for. You would feel a little comfort that he didn't use you and ditch you like a b i t c h without conscience. That money would serve a purpose of making you have that sense of getting something in return more like a settlement.

Go and get your pay from your ex for goodness sake. Don't forget to go to their home wielding a gun or club outside.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 5:03pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
I'd rather chew my right arm off.

That would add more pain to the ones you are already going through. Do you like pains?

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 5:05pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
.

Actually, I am kidding. I don't understand why some guys would be so cruel to women in that way.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by kennycanny: 5:29pm On Oct 17, 2015

all4naija:
Actually, I am kidding. I don't understand why some guys would be so cruel to women in that way.

Its not uncommon for both sexes to enter into relationship with no marriage intentions in the first place.
Many times its when you are in it that you make up your mind to proceed to marriage or back out!

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Rexology: 5:32pm On Oct 17, 2015

Hahahahaha... ladies, who knows how many young men she must have boasted with"I AM ENGAGED " even when the guy has not propose to her.

Once you start dating a lady, from that point she will become engaged by assumption, some will get married by assumption... and when the guy thinks otherwise, it will look as though the guy ever proposed to her in the first place.

Ladies please allow your guy to make that decision and propose to you, do not make or even suggest that decision for him to avoid... because if you like swear uncl*d for him, you are only aggravating own your situation, after all he neither proposed to you nor engaged you.

1 Like

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 5:43pm On Oct 17, 2015

No doubts relationships are great, " the flirting, the texting, the long phone conversations, the kissing, cuddling on the couch, the hand holding and the mind blowing s*x (hopefully).

All that is great, until it becomes a huge amount of work and efforts you weren't signed up for........
Through out our lives, we may have fallen in and out of love a thousand times, sometimes its easy and simple, most time its tough and heartbreaking. You may know deep inside that there is no happy light at the end of the tunnel of love you're in.

So...what do you do? when your convinced your in a bad relationship....when your relationship leaves you depressed, drained and empty. ........
Do you turn around, go back and make a better choice, with a better hope? or you just hold on because you are too afraid to let go? Most people are left with no choice even when they find themselves in bad relationships, they don't want to let go of the sad safe relationship they seem to have. They know there is no rosy future but they still hope for a miracle.

We all know its hard to call off a relationship with some you love, mostly because of the fear built in us, but DEAR if you want a happy future you have to learn to overcome those fears.

DEFINATELY!!!!!!! every one loves a happily ever after, but this is the real world.........People are not often idealistic as they are in the pages of your favorite novel or the screen of your favorite movies. People have bad habits, attitudes and problems that prevent a relationship from being everything it could be.

WALKING AWAY IS HARD>>>>>WHY? lets be real, being alone is scary as f*ck....but when a relationship becomes toxic, the best thing you can do for your self is to walk away. Trust me, its better to be alone than to be in a bad relationship. Although being alone and being lonely are not the same thing ( story for another day). Holding on to an unhealthy relationship prevents personal growth, letting go creates room for even a healthier relationship....walking away shows personal strength..

You know its time to walk away when.....
it turns abusive; it could be verbal or physical....
the person is a habitual cheater. [cheating is un acceptable]
you've grown apart; its natural for people to drift apart over time, feelings change. If you find yourself in this situation, tell your partner the truth, it will be unfair to keep leading them on.
its unbalanced; a healthy relationship is mostly a 'give and take" situation. you both have to contribute to the growth of the relationship equally. Be a team.
its a soap opera; if your in a relationship filled with drama and your not an actor, its time to get out of it.....{end of story}
You need to make up your mind and walk out from every toxic relationship, you may have invested a lot in the relationship......but you need to know the difference between forgiveness and weakness.

#having relationship issues? your not alone.......
want advice on how to spice up your relationship?Glad to help............
get all the answers to your questions....... PS....{ I WOULD PUBLISH ALL E-MAILS AND GET THE OPINION OF READERS...names will be withheld for privacy} EMAIL ME ON ...........myhumandiary.mk@gmail.com

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Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by jabojafa(m): 5:48pm On Oct 17, 2015

nobody shd blame d guy because if d lady n d guy had defined d relatnshp rite frm d onset, den d guy wud hv been saying dis. Frm what i see, d guy waz jst in for d short term. Also most girls condemning d guy for wantin to leave d girl and also supportin her financially wud probably hv done same if d table were to b changed dt is if sum1 had come along to marry d gir dt is rich. You all wud hv supportd her to marry d rich guy sinc dis her bf hadnt peoposed to her. Finally all relatnshp must end in marriage, if not there wudnt be an EX. Also a broken relatnshp is better dan a failed marriage. And hwo are wer sure d girl wud even marry d guy sef?

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nature8(m): 6:18pm On Oct 17, 2015

This is wickedness in the highest order.. After everything, I just pity the girl..

1 Like

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by jabojafa(m): 6:54pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
Lol, you obviously don't know me. When I shut down, I SHUT ALL THE WAY DOWN. If you're an ex, you're as good as dead to me. I erase & banish every thought of you. Some of them I'm even having a hard time remembering their names, etc That's how clinical I handle break ups. Eye develops amnesia, boo

so why didnt u marry any of those ur Ex? U now see dt all relatnshp cant all end in marriage. And one shd neva marry out of pity. Since dey cant jst work den dey shld end d relatnshp in peace.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by ideyhere(f): 6:56pm On Oct 17, 2015

ShutTheFhuckUp:

May 0qun fiñqer u & dah† ur frnd.

Jesu

You badt gan grin

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by jabojafa(m): 6:58pm On Oct 17, 2015

all4naija:
Your pride gonna hurt you the most if you reject the money. I don't thin there is no guilt there in accepting what you worked for. You would feel a little comfort that he didn't use you and ditch you like a b i t c h without conscience. That money would serve a purpose of making you have that sense of getting something in return more like a settlement.

Go and get your pay from your ex for goodness sake. Don't forget to go to their home wielding a gun or club outside.

punkveer d settlement from an Ex is a form of pension. Becos u hv worked for it, u shd collect it. It is ur sweat. tongue

all4naija:
Your pride gonna hurt you the most if you reject the money. I don't thin there is no guilt there in accepting what you worked for. You would feel a little comfort that he didn't use you and ditch you like a b i t c h without conscience. That money would serve a purpose of making you have that sense of getting something in return more like a settlement.

Go and get your pay from your ex for goodness sake. Don't forget to go to their home wielding a gun or club outside.

punkveer d settlement from an Ex is a form of pension. Becos u hv worked for it, u shd collect it. It is ur sweat.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 7:06pm On Oct 17, 2015

jabojafa:
so why didnt u marry any of those ur Ex? U now see dt all relatnshp cant all end in marriage. And one shd neva marry out of pity. Since dey cant jst work den dey shld end d relatnshp in peace.

Who mentioned anything about marriage now? I never dated anyone with an expectation of marriage in mind. I'm not that type of girl. I'm a realist. I date knowing fully well that everything has a beginning & an end.

I agree that he should just end it once & for all. No need to keep stringing her along.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by Nobody: 7:09pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
Who mentioned anything about marriage now? I never dated anyone with an expectation of marriage in mind. I'm not that type of girl. I'm a realist. I date knowing fully well that everything has a beginning & an end.

I agree that he should just end it once & for all. No need to keep stringing her along.

Re: Is It Okay To Settle Her If He Can't Marry Her? by jabojafa(m): 7:14pm On Oct 17, 2015

PunkyVeer:
Who mentioned anything about marriage now? I never dated anyone with an expectation of marriage in mind. I'm not that type of girl. I'm a realist. I date knowing fully well that everything has a beginning & an end.

I agree that he should just end it once & for all. No need to keep stringing her along.

but dt is what most ladies dt commented on this thread are advocating he shd do.

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