₦airaland Forum

tosyne2much:
Egbon u sef dey here ni?

Moz22:
This is baseless..so sorry to say. I have had instances whereby d girl tells d guy to send tfare for her to travel to d guy's place..its a matter of choice. Afterall its not like d guy dey use afoshe or the girl has been charmed or whatsoever..so this topic is fruitless

bwhahahahhaa roflwkmd lmao


Bros, see as I dey burst laf here.. You funny I swear

Oliviaarims:
OK, now I'm getting really concerned. Why do a lot of guys find it very easy to just ask a girl to travel down to see them? It's weird. They may have just been talking casually for a couple of days or at best weeks and sb starts making a very funny demand. Like, why the heck should a girl actually travel to visit some random dude at her own peril?

And these dudes pop the question so easily like it's no big deal at all. A girl could be in Delta, for instance, and a guy with whom she has no real connection with will be asking her to come down to Abuja. Is it some sort of joke question or they really do believe that it will be done? If really the guy's interested in meeting up, he's supposed to know that he's in a better place to be the one making the effort and not the other way round.

Perhaps, some ppl do it . But there's always going to be exceptions to everything and I daresay it's a really minute percentage who does things like that, so why do they still ask?

MRBrownJ:
i think you are the one who doesnt understand us men... you see, since there is some sort of connection here (however small/formal it may be), that man wants to try his luck and stop wasting time with this back and forth long distance BS.... so he invites the gal over. if she comes and they get along like a glove then they can continue making sense out of this thing (and possibly have a great r/ship), if they dont get along then at least he would have possibly gotten some "free" coochie.

so as you can see, it is a win-win situation here for men, and certainly not unnecessary invites..... it becomes unnecessary when the gal dont give a damn about the guy but keep stringing him along for online chit chat that goes nowhere, and where everyone can pretend to be who they are not, since they never met in real life.

now if that gal doesnt want to meet, then fair enough, and let that guy not waste any more time with you... but sadly we all know that many of these women CRAVE for men's attention.

jrerico1:
No. I think before girls travel far, he must have made way for the T fare but you can't trust no one. There're scammers everywhere.

Oliviaarims:
It's most definitely not t-fare issue. Safety in so many ramifications is more of a major concern.

jearile:
Perception or Character... It's either they perceive you are like their previous victims or it is just in their nature to be irresponsible.
There are ample of boys and girls who think they are men and ladies but in reality what seems to be common sense is not common because they have lost every sense of the word DIGNITY.

AyamConfidence:
baba na Oliviaarims get thread o i supose dey na

ronald4lif:
The safety concern brings another twist to it and I think for a vulnerable society like ours risking to go meet someone we don't know their criminal background from afar doesn't sound great. But other factors remains valid.

Oliviaarims:
Ehnn. I created a thread? I must have been high. What did I write up there? Lol

Estharfabian:
One just asked me to come down to Adamawa..(By road)...


Bokoharam's central!! What nonsense!!!

Oliviaarims:
Lol. U don't get it. The girl hasn't professed love or the sort. They talk on very neutral grounds. Sometimes, the conversation doesn't get past exchange of pleasantries..So, he should know that there isn't any real attraction. And the dude will still think it okay to be inviting her over. Whatever for?

If she does ask him to come over, then yea. That could be regarded as a greenlight.

Let's however not lose sight of the point. Some guys just make unnecessary invitations!

Oliviaarims:



That's why it's all the more ridiculous that some guys would even think of asking a girl to take the risk, when there's no real bond between them.


And some girls really do that.

MRBrownJ:
i think you are the one who doesnt understand us men... you see, since there is some sort of connection here (however small/formal it may be), that man wants to try his luck and stop wasting time with this back and forth long distance BS.... so he invites the gal over. if she comes and they get along like a glove then they can continue making sense out of this thing (and possibly have a great r/ship), if they dont get along then at least he would have possibly gotten some "free" coochie.

so as you can see, it is a win-win situation here for men, and certainly not unnecessary invites..... it becomes unnecessary when the gal dont give a damn about the guy but keep stringing him along for online chit chat that goes nowhere, and where everyone can pretend to be who they are not, since they never met in real life.

now if that gal doesnt want to meet, then fair enough, and let that guy not waste any more time with you... but sadly we all know that many of these women CRAVE for men's attention.

ronald4lif:
I think if the lady finds the man worthy of travelling to her base, she too can do same. All these societal imposed protocols should be scrapped biko.

AyamConfidence:
me i no know o...na Tosin ask if i dey here and i say yes Olivia na beta pikin bt if u high beta unhigh o...highness is only for kings....wetin i dey write sef...*snores outta here

Djboosting:
Why do I have a feeling this is what u're experiencing as of the moment.. #passionate.

What I don't seem to understand is that are you trying to use this medium to find out what doing the "traveling over" really means. OR you're trying to undermine the boldness of the guy who seem relentless on you coming over?

Oliviaarims:
Lolz.... I think I'm no longer high. But pls, can u help me investigate what got me high in the first place?


N:B. I don't smoke nor drink.

ronald4lif:
Having an indepth assessment of the risk and safety issues involve it doesn't make much of a sense going to visit a guy first in a society like ours. Someone you don't know their history and background records and moreso in a society where rape cases are disregarded and most goes unreported due to the lack of trust in the judicial system.

An open place should be more secure and better to get to know each other better. And if a lady is to travel to meet him it means they're going to stay either in his place or a hotel. However, if he's to come over every meeting is likely to take place in a public venue, which is safer.

Sure ladies do that and sometimes it depends on how long they have relate and know each other, their chatting history. Which would have build more trust.

Oliviaarims:
The only time he can be deemed worthy is if they're in a relationship or both are intending to consciously start one.

AyamConfidence:
then maybe u sniff or cook 'em...i've heard of people who cook them you know...even more potent than when you smoke 'it'

ronald4lif:
I beg to disagree. And my reason is based on the premise that the average Nigerian woman is overly withdrawn and grandiosely reserve. This which usually makes the Nigerian man just assume once he's exchanging correspondence with a lady on a constant basis then she must be interested and nursing a relationship in mind.

How would they know that the chat is just an innocent and casual one? You lots are too close-minded when it comes to expressing oneself towards friendship and or relationship as the case may be so we just have to assume stuff even when they're non-existing. Can't fault us on that can you?

Oliviaarims:
Maybe I bought weed spice unknowingly, then.

Oliviaarims:
I think I was simply asking a rhetorical question. Didn't know how the question landed on Nairaland rather than remain in my head.

It's just surprising how too many random dudes just want to try their luck when there's no greenlight anywhere.

AyamConfidence:
na you talk am o...suprisingly weed is very good with Egusi soup...nice vegetable

Djboosting:
That's why there is freedom in "turning up/down" ... Just be ready to take the responsibility for any decision made..

Since most of 'em dudes don't know the way to get the 'emotional spark' burning in order to get what they want, when they want it and with who they want it with...
Won't be surprised if they do the direct approach to try their 'luck' as claimed.

Can't blame the 'boys'..

Oliviaarims:
Well, to an extent that's true. A casual regular chat can easily be mistaken for sth more serious. But before he thinks about inviting her over or himself coming over, the purpose must be stated and well
understood.

ronald4lif:
But wait, are you saying a guy will just invite a lady to his base without making his intention known? No blarney or flattery enticement even if it's passive and not straightforward? How is that even possible? He might have made his intent known except if the lady is ignorant or blind to the signs.