₦airaland Forum

Oliviaarims:
Of course. It' s up to the person being invited to know when to clearly say No.

Djboosting:
You deal with the 'invites' too?

Oliviaarims:
What I mean here is that before consider going out of their way to see each other, both parties should have discussed the end purpose to the meet up and should have agreed to be on the same page.

It's not enough for the guy to start making moves on the assumption that the girl wants sth with him, judging by the way she chats. It's necessary to confirm.

If she puts him straight and says that she wants no such relationship or that she harbours no romantic feelings towards him, then I see no further need for an invitation.

Oliviaarims:
Lol. That's just ur concern, abi? Go away!

ronald4lif:
The embolden brings me back to my previous question. How possible is it for a girl to affirm (emphasis on affirm) she's not interested in engaging in an amorous affair with a guy and same guy goes ahead to invite her over on a journey of several miles.

She echoed she doesn't want a date nor have any interest in you whatsoever and then the guy still invites her? On what basis and who does that? Pardon my ignorance but it sounds foolish.

Djboosting:
Just don't beg me to cum back.. Time will be up soon. #smirks

Oliviaarims:
Win-win situation for men. How selfish! Free cookie, too. Imagine that.

U just about summed it up. They want a win win situation. Develop a relationship or get a free coochie. That's why girls won't fall for it. Because they'd most likely be at the losing end.

ronald4lif:
MRBrownJ, sorry to ask I don't know if you're a Nigerian or have ever been there but I'm sure you're conversant with the poor security, data base system of her citizen and their non-challant attitude towards rape and other sexual harassment cases from relevant authorities. In light of this, what do you reckon? Is it safe for a lady to make the first visitation move?

MRBrownJ:
i mean, you were clueless about why men did that so i gave you a possible reason... which makes a lot of sense. dont you women do things in your lives that are positive (aka win-win) solely for y'all? read again what you wrote earlier on, and tell me how this is beneficial to us men. women dont act any differently here.



BWAAAAAAAAAH!!! so developping a r/ship OR getting a free vacation (and some "good time" ) is wrong for women?! would you rather developping a r/ship OR getting free gifts and money (as you string the guy along)? at least women get something great from the male deal, what do men get from the female deal, if it doesnt work out?!

we must live on a different planet, a man flies you out to some fancy city, he wine and dine you, flirts with you, maybe even takes you shopping (thats the mumus out there) takes you to watch some movies, maybe dancing, treats you like the princess that you are, and in return he expects some warm affection that should come naturally that you will BOTH enjoy... and you see something wrong here?! if feelings aint mutual then fair enough, dont waste any time and excuse yourself 30mins into the date, et voila case closed.



bro, there are a few issues:
the rape/ritualist/kidnapping thingy in Nigeria is a big deal.... before a woman can decide to meet a guy she has to be very clear about her intentions. with the way many Nigerian men think, i dont think it is advisable for a lady to visit a guy at his home (that she aint feeling sexually like that). in the mind of many Nigerians, a gal that come to said guy's home is a confirmation that she wants sex... which is a completely wrong way of thinking imho. thats why women should stay away from men's place if they aint ready, and instead they should stay in hotels if they coming from other cities.

whoever has the means and desire to make the visit happen, should do so. but if a man spends money to bring a gal to his city, he expects to get closer (emotionally and physically) to that woman, to score some valuable points for their possible union, or just have some good time together. 1st visitation should happen when/where both are the most comfy to do so, but one thing is certain, they have to evolve (emotionally or physically) after that visit if not then thats a bad investment for the both of them.

also, there has to be a clear understanding between these two people before embarking on such journey as to what the purpose of the travel is. we men want to burn bridges and we have no problems having some bedroom acrobatics on the 1st weekend together... is that wrong really? it isnt to most, and it is all about being honest with what you desire. if the lady can afford it, she can pay for the hotel of her choice so that she is in control, at all time, as to where she stays and how things goes. furthermore, if she isnt down for any hanky panky then she should excuse herself from dinner/movies etc and go back to her hotel (or better yet, not come to visit at all). but we have to be clear on one thing: a man is not gonna fly a gal out just to watch her eat 10plates of amala and then kiss her good night.

so beforehand, women have to be realistic and ask themselves (and these men) the RIGHT questions... and these men have to be honest about their intentions from the get go.

MRBrownJ:
i mean, you were clueless about why men did that so i gave you a possible reason... which makes a lot of sense. dont you women do things in your lives that are positive (aka win-win) solely for y'all? read again what you wrote earlier on, and tell me how this is beneficial to us men. women dont act any differently here.



BWAAAAAAAAAH!!! so developping a r/ship OR getting a free vacation (and some "good time" ) is wrong for women?! would you rather developping a r/ship OR getting free gifts and money (as you string the guy along)? at least women get something great from the male deal, what do men get from the female deal, if it doesnt work out?!

we must live on a different planet, a man flies you out to some fancy city, he wine and dine you, flirts with you, maybe even takes you shopping (thats the mumus out there) takes you to watch some movies, maybe dancing, treats you like the princess that you are, and in return he expects some warm affection that should come naturally that you will BOTH enjoy... and you see something wrong here?! if feelings aint mutual then fair enough, dont waste any time and excuse yourself 30mins into the date, et voila case closed.



bro, there are a few issues:
the rape/ritualist/kidnapping thingy in Nigeria is a big deal.... before a woman can decide to meet a guy she has to be very clear about her intentions. with the way many Nigerian men think, i dont think it is advisable for a lady to visit a guy at his home (that she aint feeling sexually like that). in the mind of many Nigerians, a gal that come to said guy's home is a confirmation that she wants sex... which is a completely wrong way of thinking imho. thats why women should stay away from men's place if they aint ready, and instead they should stay in hotels if they coming from other cities.

whoever has the means and desire to make the visit happen, should do so. but if a man spends money to bring a gal to his city, he expects to get closer (emotionally and physically) to that woman, to score some valuable points for their possible union, or just have some good time together. 1st visitation should happen when/where both are the most comfy to do so, but one thing is certain, they have to evolve (emotionally or physically) after that visit if not then thats a bad investment for the both of them.

also, there has to be a clear understanding between these two people before embarking on such journey as to what the purpose of the travel is. we men want to burn bridges and we have no problems having some bedroom acrobatics on the 1st weekend together... is that wrong really? it isnt to most, and it is all about being honest with what you desire. if the lady can afford it, she can pay for the hotel of her choice so that she is in control, at all time, as to where she stays and how things goes. furthermore, if she isnt down for any hanky panky then she should excuse herself from dinner/movies etc and go back to her hotel (or better yet, not come to visit at all). but we have to be clear on one thing: a man is not gonna fly a gal out just to watch her eat 10plates of amala and then kiss her good night.

so beforehand, women have to be realistic and ask themselves (and these men) the RIGHT questions... and these men have to be honest about their intentions from the get go.

MRBrownJ:
i mean, you were clueless about why men did that so i gave you a possible reason... which makes a lot of sense. dont you women do things in your lives that are positive (aka win-win) solely for y'all? read again what you wrote earlier on, and tell me how this is beneficial to us men. women dont act any differently here.



BWAAAAAAAAAH!!! so developping a r/ship OR getting a free vacation (and some "good time" ) is wrong for women?! would you rather developping a r/ship OR getting free gifts and money (as you string the guy along)? at least women get something great from the male deal, what do men get from the female deal, if it doesnt work out?!

we must live on a different planet, a man flies you out to some fancy city, he wine and dine you, flirts with you, maybe even takes you shopping (thats the mumus out there) takes you to watch some movies, maybe dancing, treats you like the princess that you are, and in return he expects some warm affection that should come naturally that you will BOTH enjoy... and you see something wrong here?! if feelings aint mutual then fair enough, dont waste any time and excuse yourself 30mins into the date, et voila case closed.



bro, there are a few issues:
the rape/ritualist/kidnapping thingy in Nigeria is a big deal.... before a woman can decide to meet a guy she has to be very clear about her intentions. with the way many Nigerian men think, i dont think it is advisable for a lady to visit a guy at his home (that she aint feeling sexually like that). in the mind of many Nigerians, a gal that come to said guy's home is a confirmation that she wants sex... which is a completely wrong way of thinking imho. thats why women should stay away from men's place if they aint ready, and instead they should stay in hotels if they coming from other cities.

whoever has the means and desire to make the visit happen, should do so. but if a man spends money to bring a gal to his city, he expects to get closer (emotionally and physically) to that woman, to score some valuable points for their possible union, or just have some good time together. 1st visitation should happen when/where both are the most comfy to do so, but one thing is certain, they have to evolve (emotionally or physically) after that visit if not then thats a bad investment for the both of them.

also, there has to be a clear understanding between these two people before embarking on such journey as to what the purpose of the travel is. we men want to burn bridges and we have no problems having some bedroom acrobatics on the 1st weekend together... is that wrong really? it isnt to most, and it is all about being honest with what you desire. if the lady can afford it, she can pay for the hotel of her choice so that she is in control, at all time, as to where she stays and how things goes. furthermore, if she isnt down for any hanky panky then she should excuse herself from dinner/movies etc and go back to her hotel (or better yet, not come to visit at all). but we have to be clear on one thing: a man is not gonna fly a gal out just to watch her eat 10plates of amala and then kiss her good night.

so beforehand, women have to be realistic and ask themselves (and these men) the RIGHT questions... and these men have to be honest about their intentions from the get go.

Oliviaarims:
Lmao.. Oh, my goodness, this is funny. What I deduce from ur write up, though.. Is that they have selfish and perhaps ulterior motives.

But wait first, Thunder fire you back. Lol

Estharfabian:

Oliviaarims:
Imagine that! I wonder if he really did believe u'd come or it's just sth some groul of guys like doing. Just sit down and try their luck to see if a silly girl will fall a victim.

Well, the Motive is just sad, Hilarious n Silly....And to Think some feather brained girls would Hop on their heels and journey right there... Crazy!


I mean, I don't even know the Guy's surname...
nyways, I still think it's a matter of choice...No one's forcing anyone...

Oliviaarims:
OK, now I'm getting really concerned. Why do a lot of guys find it very easy to just ask a girl to travel down to see them? It's weird. They may have just been talking casually for a couple of days or at best weeks and sb starts making a very funny demand. Like, why the heck should a girl actually travel to visit some random dude at her own peril?

And these dudes pop the question so easily like it's no big deal at all. A girl could be in Delta, for instance, and a guy with whom she has no real connection with will be asking her to come down to Abuja. Is it some sort of joke question or they really do believe that it will be done? If really the guy's interested in meeting up, he's supposed to know that he's in a better place to be the one making the effort and not the other way round.

Perhaps, some ppl do it . But there's always going to be exceptions to everything and I daresay it's a really minute percentage who does things like that, so why do they still ask?

Oliviaarims:
Lol. Mr. BrownJ, plenty thanks for this. I'm sure so many girls would learn from this and know before hand what exactly they are getting themselves into.... Without deceiving themselves. Like really, u did so well.


Having said all that, I think I like my sheltered life. I'd rather observe the world from my comfort zone that I know as safe.

Ronal.d4lif, seen... Tosyne.2much, come see what this guy's got to say.

All female Nairalanders, y'all need to read this.

Oliviaarims:
U're trying to teach me bad things.

Oliviaarims:
OK, now I'm getting really concerned. Why do a lot of guys find it very easy to just ask a girl to travel down to see them? It's weird. They may have just been talking casually for a couple of days or at best weeks and sb starts making a very funny demand. Like, why the heck should a girl actually travel to visit some random dude at her own peril?

And these dudes pop the question so easily like it's no big deal at all. A girl could be in Delta, for instance, and a guy with whom she has no real connection with will be asking her to come down to Abuja. Is it some sort of joke question or they really do believe that it will be done? If really the guy's interested in meeting up, he's supposed to know that he's in a better place to be the one making the effort and not the other way round.

Perhaps, some ppl do it . But there's always going to be exceptions to everything and I daresay it's a really minute percentage who does things like that, so why do they still ask?

MzPecs:
Seriously, guys are so fond of that rubbish and they say it like it's no big deal!

What's stopping such guy from travelling all the way from his location to the lady's location.

...and the funny part is, some of them will ask you to transport yourself all the way and they'll refund you when you come.

bloodyBLOGGER:
Oloshos now complain when they call them for their job interview.

Youngpo413:
why should a sane guy travel from his location to the ladies or is he that jobless?

So the lady is jobless then?

MzPecs:
So the lady is jobless then?

Youngpo413:
if she refused,another one will gladly oblige,we have so many cheap ladies nowadays,so why waste time with one.

Oliviaarims:
Lol. U don't get it. The girl hasn't professed love or the sort. They talk on very neutral grounds. Sometimes, the conversation doesn't get past exchange of pleasantries..So, he should know that there isn't any real attraction. And the dude will still think it okay to be inviting her over. Whatever for?

If she does ask him to come over, then yea. That could be regarded as a greenlight.

Let's however not lose sight of the point. Some guys just make unnecessary invitations!

MzPecs:

MzPecs:

AyamConfidence:
no ma...but it helps you to sleep better...ave seen who ate beans with that kind thyme and she slept for 3 days straight...aint it nice?

oglalasioux:
Speak for yourself. A greater percentage of girls do that as a trade. They are even ready to transport to hell to visit a guy.

Estharfabian:
Well, the Motive is just sad, Hilarious n Silly....And to Think some feather brained girls would Hop on their heels and journey right there... Crazy!


I mean, I don't even know the Guy's surname...
nyways, I still think it's a matter of choice...No one's forcing anyone...

Oliviaarims:
Lol. Totally nice. Sleep and forget all ur troubles!

AyamConfidence:
thats the essence of life Hakuna Matata....i actualy know a good sales outlet...maybe i can introduce you