₦airaland Forum

savanto:
Why wouldn't you like her? Like attracts likes. May God deliver bachelors from the ever-ravaging spirit of 'alabosa'

Many times, when I'm in the midst of my siblings ( brothers), I find myself shaking my head unconsciously when I remember that girls of nowadays are so loose. I would be like- how can I explain to these brothers that dating is quite a different thing from marriage?

How can I explain to them that most married women/men at one time in their lives must cheat on their partners and Vice versa? (This is very difficult to accept but it's true)

I feel for the OP but won't advocate divorce at this stage but a separation is long over-due.

Frankness may be a virtue, but it is not a virtue that brings its own reward!

poseidon12:
Put yourself in op's shoes. Will you really follow your own advice if your wife is sleeping around like a LovePeddler?
What makes you think divorce is not an option?

jmaxjohn:
K. I'm baq.
So ur wife z cheating on u, hmmm.
Well, it seems she hasn't begun cheating physically yet (derz still slight hope), but trust me, if a real heart eater puts pressure on her, she'll break.
U hv 3 options, nd d 3rd option has worked for me b4 nd i kept my woman (dnt ask )
(1) U either divorce her with d inconclusive proof u hv; trust ur cheating woman to turn it against u or (2) u play a game (to play d game successfully, ull need to sell ur soul to d devil and derz no coming baq).
The game involves u keeping d shut up and pretend like uve noticed nothing and then plan to catch ur wife in d act without her knowing she's been busted. After getting enough proof, den u do things to make her feel d same hurt u felt, and dat z wen u let out d secret u know (it'll reset her brain).
But ur soul wudv been long eaten up with hate and ur marriage ruined.
(3). U need to grow some balls and be a beast , show her u feel and know uve been betrayed. Call a family member of hers u can trust with a secret to ur haus, break her phone in front of her eyes, break ur tv set, let d rage eat u up, show her ur wedding photos, tear dem, cry, let her feel d pain of d husband she married; d husband she claims to love, grab a knife (no stab am o), shout, most importantly let her c u r hurt; let her know those male bastards (u hv no biz with dem) won't take her in if ur marriage, her home, collapses ryt nw; get ur wife baq for God's sake and stop being a sissy

Mizbaby:
Beats me how some men dump women for the silliest reasons

......and then fight to keep a cheating wife

Wonders shall never end.....

*runs away*

jmaxjohn:
U hav a husband (nt a bf), u hv kids with him, u loved him nd still do, he's not cheating physically but emotionally he's drifting away from u, and u'll just giv up on ur marriage abi. Lol. No wonder women like u will let another women take over their home. Den ull lata cry dah he never loved u wen u wer neva willing to take charge of wat was urs. Mtcheeew. (seems ure nt in a serious relationship yet)
*i run farther from u*

For d op... Women start acting dis way coz dey feel deir men hv nothing more to offer, dey r nt sponateneous enough, dey r too gentle (if i Bleep up, he will still control himself). Den dat foolish thought grows into marital disrespect and uncontrolled flirting.
Shock her, break shit, become unpredictable, and tell me if u won't get uf respect baq.

Baq to u Mizbaby, if u hv cheated, or knows someone dat has, on a guy that loved u dearly b4 and wud neva cheat on u. Y did u, or d person, do it?

D fact z some relationships can b saved. She lied about d date coz she's scared nd still has a level of love nd respect 4 him (dats a classic emotional cheater). D fact dat he hasn't seen a text or chat saying "d sex was grt" or she hasn't openly disrespected him dat cheating z normal shows she still values him. Dis shii is fixable

byvan03:
What is this marriage worth to her? If it means something to her then pull a surprise stunt. Serve her divorce papers without explanation, let her seek for explanation , that's when you divulge. Leave her to the begging and complaining to relatives, when you have had enough, draw your terms and conditions of reconciliation. She takes it or leaves it.

This is assuming you want to fight for your marriage. If she is already tired of the marriage, well....

bukatyne:
Happy new year dear

With the stunts she's pulling, is it worth anything to her?

Not one man to say the husband is lacking (not an excuse), several men?

I can't even drift emotionally because he won't take that at all.

Mizbaby:
Ur wife cheated on u.....

And u are crying and breaking stuff? Hmmn, are u a man at all

If I try that I will leave d house that very day, without my kids.

My husband is a real man ( that's why I love him very much). I can't even drift emotionally because he won't take that at all.

Men like u are d reason why some women will cheat. Period.

cococandy:
Pls stop defending yourself.
Let the ediots attack you if they will.
If your advice was given to married woman who's husband is busy running around town with other ladies, then you'd be a good woman before their eyes.

elantraceey:
What do you intend to gain from using cuss words on a fellow woman like you? Please don't judge her at least not yet.



@Op I took the time to read all you posted and I can't help but notice how the guy is so immature and your wife too. Please first let go of any thought of divorce in your head as what you have now are just assumptions.


She's your wife and you've been with her for 10years so you should know how to get the truth from her and I'll say you should use love not anger. Ask her questions like if she isn't satisfied with you or where you've missed it or something,.make it seem like the fault is coming from you even though its not and she'll most likely be comfortable and she'll begin to open up. Be ready to forgive no matter how bitter it turns out at least for the sake of your children.


Make sure she deletes and block those guys and try to resolve whatsoever reason she'll give.


#Myhumbleopinion



Lalasticlala help this guy get good advice.

jmaxjohn:
Y do women think dat men wu don't ever cry, men who r not in touch with deir emotions, r d real men?
Nt asking d guy to cry like a helpless child. He's being too gentle dats y she's drifting farther to more spontaneous guys....arrgh...i rest my case abeg. U'll neva get it. Ure too mentally inefficient to get d point from a gentleman of taste nd class.

dis z d only uselful thing uve said since u registered on NL. Abeg go wash plate.

Miami11:
Pray and fast for your wife
Talk to her calmly about the issue
Divorce is a sin
Knee down and ask for forgiveness
Treat her right
Talk to your pastor
Take her for deliverance to mountain of fire closest to you
Try to make her happy,maybe she is bored
Maybe you are not doing enough to please her

Faraidi:
the women in my family are harlots. They are worse than the op's wife

RichyRodman:
First of all for her to receive a manhood pics then 6 months later more manhood pics it certainly means that she craves big ones and u have a small one! If u don't satisfy your wife,Dude Another Man Will! (Am so sure my wife won't cheat cus I'll certainly satisfy mine when I eventually get married)
Secondly she likes sex a lot perhaps u don't satisfy her sexually enough!
Thirdly I can't advise u divorce but take drastic steps tha would send chills down her spine for the rest of her life. Take your kids for DNA test that is proof No1 it don't make u hate the kids that aren yours because they already grown up calling u daddy but at least it solves a whole lot of mess and it would make her fear u!
Fourthly,when the result come of course definitely from the way I see her one of the kids wouldn't be yours.
Also get the phone numbers of these shameless men sleeping with your wife,print out some of these conversations,take your wife on a visit to that her mum that welcomed her ex boyfriend,bring out all these evidences both DNA tests result that she never knew when u took your children to the hopital when she Went to the market u tell the children u want to do Genotype and blood group for them but plan with doctor to take samples for DNA too.
Let her mother know how shamelessly her daughter was brought up and how she inculcates it to your children. Call the men in her presence with. Her number put it on speaker and see if he will answer the call with "hello baby" unless she has told everyone there's fire on the mountain. Insist that she stays with her mother for 1 month as punishment unless she the one that bought the house or paying the rent (just as some Nigerian couples do these days and makes a wife the bread winner thereby crippling the husbands powers)
My brother u have to take the bull by the horn and let her cry for forgiveness,u need to take what. Belongs to u back to your possession although it may not change her if u can't satisfy her sexually a woman. Must always go to the man that satisfies her. She belongs to u both of u MUST bring up the kids together,let her realise her mistakes infront of her family,divorce isn't always the answer to an ailing marriage or a cheating partner either Male or female. If anyone advises u better than this I want to read it on my email or whatsapp I'll ask for an account number for a price HOHA! Zentascommunication@gmail.com +2348032907249

elantraceey:
What do you intend to gain from using cuss words on a fellow woman like you? Please don't judge her at least not yet.



@Op I took the time to read all you posted and I can't help but notice how the guy is so immature and your wife too. Please first let go of any thought of divorce in your head as what you have now are just assumptions.


She's your wife and you've been with her for 10years so you should know how to get the truth from her and I'll say you should use love not anger. Ask her questions like if she isn't satisfied with you or where you've missed it or something,.make it seem like the fault is coming from you even though its not and she'll most likely be comfortable and she'll begin to open up. Be ready to forgive no matter how bitter it turns out at least for the sake of your children.


Make sure she deletes and block those guys and try to resolve whatsoever reason she'll give.


#Myhumbleopinion



Lalasticlala help this guy get good advice.

BTT:
You are not man enough. QED.

Miami11:
Did you have to quote the whole epistle smh!

andyanders:
Op, from what you stated herein, I will say that you are one in a million for having to even stay in same house with such a woman for that long without throwing her out.

Even if she has 30 kids for me, it will be over the first day I saw the pix, talk less of having to stomach that for that long.

Anyway, maybe you are the weak type that is under the skirt of a woman.

Dheartless:
this one na mumu o
so who told the wifes to manage with a cheat?
is it the husbands?
you are the fool if you are insinuating that anyone wether man or woman should manage the kind of cheating character the op described

Toks2008:
All these don't matter dude..these are series of emotional affairs due to boredom and many married ladies do it and delete the messages.

However,just warn ger to stop or you wil divorce her but if she continues just let her be and dont bother wasting your money on divorcing her because it wil be foolish to spend your money to free an adulterous wife but you should rather let her face the parole by herself while you quietly search for another wife if you must.

That is my own formula for dealing with an adulterous wife.

jmaxjohn:
K. I'm baq.
So ur wife z cheating on u, hmmm.
Well, it seems she hasn't begun cheating physically yet (derz still slight hope), but trust me, if a real heart eater puts pressure on her, she'll break.
U hv 3 options, nd d 3rd option has worked for me b4 nd i kept my woman (dnt ask )
(1) U either divorce her with d inconclusive proof u hv; trust ur cheating woman to turn it against u or (2) u play a game (to play d game successfully, ull need to sell ur soul to d devil and derz no coming baq).
The game involves u keeping d shut up and pretend like uve noticed nothing and then plan to catch ur wife in d act without her knowing she's been busted. After getting enough proof, den u do things to make her feel d same hurt u felt, and dat z wen u let out d secret u know (it'll reset her brain).
But ur soul wudv been long eaten up with hate and ur marriage ruined.
(3). U need to grow some balls and be a beast , show her u feel and know uve been betrayed. Call a family member of hers u can trust with a secret to ur haus, break her phone in front of her eyes, break ur tv set, let d rage eat u up, show her ur wedding photos, tear dem, cry, let her feel d pain of d husband she married; d husband she claims to love, grab a knife (no stab am o), shout, most importantly let her c u r hurt; let her know those male bastards (u hv no biz with dem) won't take her in if ur marriage, her home, collapses ryt nw; get ur wife baq for God's sake and stop being a sissy