₦airaland Forum

Oyind17:
Love do exit, it takes a brave mind to know that. I have had my share of love on a rough side. Sometimes love can make u do things you won't believe.

I will share my story someday

Oliviaarims:
I agree with u that love could develop for more than one person if left unbridled....

And yes, love is conditional. I daresay no human can love unconditionally as long as he's a finite and imperfect being.

But I don't agree that it's a feeling hinged basically on personal interest. In a different post on this same thread, I was trying to explain what love being conditional implies. The conditions in this context should be certain very basic things necessary. Feelings based on material things whatsoever doesn't count as love.. If it's prefixed by anything selfish, then it isn't love.

kaboninc:
You, IzonOwei, Oahray...are you guys in Love?

ronald4lif:
I feel indifferent about the bold. For whatever reason we feel one should get attracted and fall in love with a person, money and materialism is one.

We live in a capitalist world where almost everything is connected and has monetary value so for anyone to dismiss and undermine the importance of money in a relationship/marriage then they aren't only being incongruous with the verisimilitude of life but living in self denial.

For whatever reason(s) that could serve as love, be it good looks, personality, intelligence etc that could serve as a precipitation of love and ferment love, money can be one. In fact, should be one of the primary factors.

About time we start living within the realms of common sense and face reality. Money is an essential factor not only in life but ignites a relationship positively so why should we dismiss it as a catalyst for love. A lady can be attracted and love someone based on his financial prowess and the comfort he can guarantee same way another can love for variant reasons.

I refuse to believe that money and materialism isn't a factor to be considered before loving or feeling attraction for someone. And that's me being pragmatic.

Oliviaarims:
U've just turned the whole argument upside down.



I wasn't relegating the importance of money in a relationship (or any human endeavour, in fact) to the background. I simply said if money and other material things is the sole basis/condition for an existing feeling, then that feeling isn't love. Simple.

Oahray:
I do not agree with your opinion that once there's truly love between two persons at any point in time, it cannot ever become something else.

Let me use the example of love between God and man you praised as the perfect example of love.

God loved the nation of Israel so much (since they were descendants of Abraham through Isaac and Jacob) that he delivered them from Egypt even through the Red Sea.

The love was mutual at that point, and Israel vowed to obey God.

Yet God nearly wiped the whole nation out shortly after when they worshipped a Golden Calf. Much later, He promised the adults older than 19 would all die off in the wilderness for their lack of faith.

Sometime later, David stubbornly conducted a census and Israelites with no say in the matter died by divine pestilence. Then Jesus finished them off centuries later by saying their house have been abandoned to them for rejecting him.

If God's pure love can be influenced by the actions of the object of his love, why not humans?

My point is, the fact that love once existed doesn't mean it always would forever. It just never fails to act as long as it still exists, but it does die. It dies when the other person eventually becomes (or maybe we just didn't notice earlier) the opposite of what made the love sprout in the first place.

AfroKnight:
Bro, I know you are a follower of Jesus. He said we should love others. Are you saying he wasted his words by asking us to love our neighbor?

All human love is conditional; even between husband and wife. We earn it. Step out of line and that love will wane. That is the true value of love. Accept it and reciprocate.

Remember, love costs the lover.

ronald4lif:
I feel indifferent about the bold. For whatever reason we feel one should get attracted and fall in love with a person, money and materialism is one.

We live in a capitalist world where almost everything is connected and has monetary value so for anyone to dismiss and undermine the importance of money in a relationship/marriage then they aren't only being incongruous with the verisimilitude of life but living in self denial.

For whatever reason(s) that could serve as love, be it good looks, personality, intelligence etc that could serve as a precipitation of love and ferment love, money can be one. In fact, should be one of the primary factors.

About time we start living within the realms of common sense and face reality. Money is an essential factor not only in life but ignites a relationship positively so why should we dismiss it as a catalyst for love. A lady can be attracted and love someone based on his financial prowess and the comfort he can guarantee same way another can love for variant reasons.

I refuse to believe that money and materialism isn't a factor to be considered before loving or feeling attraction for someone. And that's me being pragmatic.

Oliviaarims:
U've just turned the whole argument upside down.



I wasn't relegating the importance of money in a relationship (or any human endeavour, in fact) to the background. I simply said if money, and other material things is the sole basis/condition for an existing feeling, then that feeling isn't love. Simple.

QueenValerie:
That's because they don't know what it is,it's difinetion.And that it's a verb,an action not just something you say.

godman01:
And it's not a feeling.

Toks2008:
Over the years i have realized that LOVE is the most wrongly used word in the dictionary.

Do you know that when your bae says "I LOVE YOU",more often than not,that person is only stating his her feelings based on what he or she is benefiting from the union at that point in time?Take away the benefit(s) and see if such person will still profess an undying love for you.

I have seen many people who professed love to each other suddenly make a 360 degree turn and then i tend to wonder if they ever understood that word love.

I have heard of a situation where a man or woman found it so easy to walk away from the spouse and children after many years just to conclude that what they felt all through the years was probably pity and not love.

It has become the norm for us to now see a million dollar wedding crashing down even before it began and then these same people who were all smiles and curdled up on the wedding day, exchanging vows will turn against each other with so much hatred.

Husbands kill same woman they made a vow to love and wives do same to their hubbies even when they have borne the same man children.

How many husbands can still tell their wives "i love you" even if she denies him sex? how many husbands will still love their wives if she refuses to do her duties as a wife in the house? and how many women will still love their husbands even if he fails to live up to his status?

Judging from all these happenings i have decided to stop using that word love and any one who uses such word to describe his or her feelings for the partner must really take a chill pill and think deep before uttering such.

If from the real life situation i see, i think it will be reasonable for anyone to wait for at least 20years of being with your partner before you can truly say those words "I LOVE YOU" even if we all know that even after 30years people can still turn against each other but at least 20years is good enough to pass that assertion.

I have come to believe that LOVE can only exist between GOD and man and what humans feel is just a temporary feeling of desire which can be in form of initial gragra(Adrenaline love), infatuation(Unreasoning love),Lust or maybe a superficial love as a result of what you are getting from that person and in the absence of such will diminish.

Yes maybe i am over-flogging it,maybe we still have true love between very rare partners but the truth is that i would rather seek for a true friendship, a true bonding which i have found to be more realistic than that facade called True love.

My advice is that anyone in any affair should not put too much expectation but should just flow with the tide because that person who is all over you today can make a u-turn tomorrow and you will wonder if that is the same person you ever knew...

I hope this makes sense.

Oliviaarims:
Gracias

fulfillbill:
Thank you my brother...trying to sell conventional gospel to people because you had 1 or two set backs in your relationship is unfair, especially to the younger ones. You do not lose when you love...what ever you give out comes right back to you..

Sow positive energy you reap positive energy===Spiritual truth.

Well said bro.

ronald4lif:
Interesting and nicely written. An apophthegm saying has it that no matter how beautiful and magnificent a building is, if it's standing on a faulty foundation, the fall and destruction of that building is eminent. What this exert is that if love and/or relationship is founded by our desire to have our vintage interest gratified then it's faulty and can hardly last the test of time. It only subsist for as long as the reason for loving a particular person, in this case the foundation of the relationship, persist.

Like you pointed out true there are some cases where people start to develop true feelings towards a person regardless of what attracted them to that person but the only test of this claim and to ascertain their true feelings should be when their interest and benefits is no longer gratified. It's easy to claim yes I was ensnared and attracted to him/her by so so things but I've come to develop true feelings for him/her but can be proven otherwise if scrutinised. And even if it does occur, it's too infinitesimal and thus negligible.

JhyMedex:
... Whr is d seat of thoughts?...

Vikky014:
THREAD CLOSED# *IN AMERICANA 'S VOICE* GIVE IT UP FOR OLIVIAARIMS AND RONALD4LIF..BOTH OF THEM KILLED IT


LET ME SAY I LOVE BOTH OF THEM

ronald4lif:
Oh sole basis you said? Then indeed what I said was out of tune. I thought you said one of the basis. If the former I was wrong but if the latter then I wasn't. Fair enough all the same.

Oliviaarims:
Where's Tosyne.2much? I've missed him!

Baby


I'm ryt here

tosyne2much:
Baby


I'm ryt here

Oahray:
lol. The meat is cooked in a steel pot, and thoughts run riot in the brain. What's your point?

JhyMedex:
Brain is made up of trillions of synapses..
Dis synapses r composed of lipids n proteins..
Lipids n proteins r biomolecules
Biomolecules r Chemicals
Tots r simply various chemical combinations occurring 2geda..

LordOfWits:
nice logic... Lemme follow it small.
There's meat boiling in a pot. The pot is made of steel. Therefore the meat is steel too

Hope you know brain activity isn't just chemical but also electrical.

SwagPower:
Lord of wits?
N dts ur interpretation... ..
Op u knw Chem synapses r more abundant in d brain. ..
Where did he say Tots r Chemicals or beta still hw did u come up wit such a extrapolation?..

Rukkydelta:
Leave the guy alone, he is probably suffering from a heart break

IzonOwei:
thats the problem..many of our girls because of a few relationships they've been in makes them utter such self centered words..only God and her mother loves her...i laugh..and that same girl would still want to get married to frustrate a good loving man..

esosa993:
its really obvious he's suffering from heart break , imagine this dumb write up......anyone that keeps listening to his advice will just destroy his or her relationship mtcheeww