₦airaland Forum

Mine, a boy barely 3, gave me the shock of my life some time last year when he freed himself from my grip to attack a soldier with a gun standing across the road. He kept hitting the soldier with his small fists and even attempted to take his gun.
The soldier, being an understanding man, quietly asked him "But where did you see me shooting people?"
My boy replied, "In the television."
The soldier smiled "That could be my colleague but he's not around now."
I apologized for my boy's attitude but the soldier said it's no problem, he's only a kid. Children can be terrible at times.
Share with us if you have any.

I remember the day my dad dashed home from work to pick up a file only for him to enter the parlour and see his newly bought television set dismantled on the floor my by me,i was like chaiiiiiiiii,i don finally die to day,he just came close looked in an "iwoomoyi sha"(you this boy sha) manner and ultered "ko sha gbodo ma sise"(it must surely work again sha) and went his way...........

mamaafrik:
I remeber the day my dad dashed home from work to pick up a file only for him to enter the parlour and see his newly bought television set dismantled on the floor my by me,i was like chaiiiiiiiii,i don finally die to day,he just came close looked in an "iwoomoyi sha" manner and ultered "ko sha gbodo ma sise" and went his way...........

I came home to find my kid bros painting everything in the rooms. The sofas, wall pictures, dining table and the Tv set. I met them painting the bed and worst is they expected me to thank them

Well I'm not married yet but I remember d 1st day I finished 3milk tins of rice, my mother marvelled

She brought out her mom's breast and request i share with her; trying to drag my neck to it.

Cute kid loves daddy and ready to share anything with me!

i remember asking my dad why my sister didn't have a dick like me

he stopped us from taking bath together from that day

My kids? I don't even have a girlfriend

My boy sometime want to play with my joystick cos i do sleep nake.d

This happened a few years back..


After boasting to my friends about how I ate fried chicken the previous night, my 6yrs old brother told them I was lying, that I ate garri and groundnut(which was true )



So fucking embarrased.. my crush was there!!

Ain't gat no kid for now, so I'm gonna bookmark/save this page,incase my child decides to pop out from nowhere.. thn ama definitely drop some of his baddest act here..

Well, I've had a couple of experiences with my daughters:

Michellla: when I introduced the Obamas to my daughters at the west wing of the White House, Michellla yelled expletives at Michelle Obama. Can't remember her exact words, but it was something like "*@&#$ There's only one Michelle, b****!" It was very embarrassing.

Speechless3: When we ran into Hillary Clinton on our visit to the Pentagon, Speechless3 asked her if 'Hillary' was short for 'Hilarious', 'cos Mrs. Clinton "looked like a clown" to her. Needless to say, there was silence. Very awkward silence.

CaroLyner: When UN Secretary General Ban Ki Moon came to Carolyner's 6th birthday party, she asked him in front of everyone why his eyelids were "clipped", and if his Wife's name was "Sun". Chai! My sweet little angel has racist tendencies. I had to apologize to Mr. Moon.

Dechandel: Gosh! Dechandel hated religion. Anytime we went to church she'd suddenly start shouting during the sermon: "Where is the sense! Where is the sense!! This is boring!!! I remember when we worshipped at Westminster Abbey and sat next to Her Majesty, The Queen of England. Dechandel just started her rant again. Mehn...I just wanted the ground to swallow me up that day. It was that embarrassing.

Juliaann: Even though we lived in a highbrow neighbourhood, travelled the world, met influential people, Juliaann still behaved like a bush girl. I remember when we were having dinner with the Prince of Monaco and Juliaann blurted out: "I want to poo-poo!!!" Everybody spontaneously lost their appetite for food that night. I couldn't stop apologizing to the Prince. We had to setup a committee to look into Juliaann's bush girl behaviour, and we found out she had befriended one of our 1,000 maids. A little-known unrefined maid called Shakara. We quickly sacked Shakara, and that was the end of Juliaann's bush girl problems.

But, hmmm...God works in mysterious ways: the previously foul-mouthed ones amongst my daughters - Michellla and Dechandel - are now prayer warriors. And they help in keeping my other daughters in the light. In fact, Michellla just casted out the spirit of wailing from Speechless3 today. She is now a certified zombie. Praise the Lord!!!!

I love my daughters; they know I'm the best Daddy in the world!

just passing

Eating and sleeping on d same bed with mummy

Until then . chiao

I remember beating my kid sister some years back 8years ago to b precise nd she got angry and bite my dick ..am stil hapi to be alive ...cus i shouted lyk am in hell

Playing Games

Mimicking his teachers in school... "Stop making noise"," I will beat you!!"

I wrote on my dad's car

Brace yourselves, the fake stories will soon be here

Funny kids

daywalker02:
I wrote on my dad's car



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Omo u know English when u small ooo.... hmm I smell lies