bfatoba:


hahahahahahahahahaha, I can relate to your story bro. You better no cry or you won't hear the end of the story. I know friends who i can't even remember their real names because the nicknames they gave them when they did something stupid, stuck forever.

there has to be some psychology to it because its like most of the first borns I know with just another brother are stubborn. It could be that you always want to prove yourself to your little brother. My morals back then was messed up. In my mind Only I was allowed to beat up my little brother, anyone else touches him and I loose it. I've fought in school, and beat like two boys that beat my brother, only to get home and get beatings from the mum because my school uniform tore.. and my little brother was eating his food like a boss while i was crying.

My mum was a super amazing cook, so Good that after eating at home, I would get to school early before everyone and then open my lunch and eat it before my friends got to school because by then there would be too many hands. I think thats why I forgave her for all the beating.

Boss you are so on point. Lol. One thing I'm so certain about is that no matter how mum treats us we still turn out to love them the most. Like in my case. My childhood was wonderful. Grateful to God for everything. Nice meeting you man

Lmao This has to be the funniest thing I've heard all my life. Thanks for making the rest of my year.

anelen:
i remember when my cousin will shoot me with his toy gun, while am still standing, he will come to me and say uncle pls die na... lolz

Reading news till further notice

kushsy:
Mine was so embarrassing..he was 3 n I often change my pads in his presence when am on..one day I had guest n I have just changed n left the pack on d bed only for my kid boy to pick a pad and walked to the sitting room n struggling to fix it under his pants... I miss him..Rip my boy.

I was smiling reading through till the end when my smile went away. Can't imagine losing any of my boiz. Take heart.

rollUP:



Lmaoo..... Dah ur sis go sabi give head wella when she grow

Yekpa.. Weeire ni bobo yii fa

Brimstone1:
Mine, a boy barely 3, gave me the shock of my life some time last year when he freed himself from my grip to attack a soldier with a gun standing across the road. He kept hitting the soldier with his small fists and even attempted to take his gun.
The soldier, being an understanding man, quietly asked him "But where did you see me shooting people?"
My boy replied, "In the television."
The soldier smiled "That could be my colleague but he's not around now."
I apologized for my boy's attitude but the soldier said it's no problem, he's only a kid. Children can be terrible at times.
Share with us if you have any.

I can bet with my dormant account that soldier is not a Nigerian!

This one happened 10mins ago.

We just drove to my parents street. Before turning into the street, another car was approaching so i waited for him to pass before making my turn. I didnt know the car too was waiting for me as he was driving into the opposite street. The car was a worn out 504 saloon.

I still allowed the car go before me and as it passed, guess what my 4yr old (today is his bday) boy said, "see this old car". Even our house help couldnt help but laugh out loud.

Anyways, as i told my mum what just happened she told me of a little gathering they had in my my aunts house. My aunts grandchild was very active.

Every one waa eating and drinking. My nephew would go round and seeing anyone who doesnot have water, he will go get a bottle of water and put at the table. Who ever has 5alive, he will bring coke or fanta, who ever has coke or fanta, he brings water. When every body had finish eating, he said,"since all of you have finish eating, go out, i want to close the door".

Lolz

bfatoba:
when I was younger, I was forming big boy if anyone sent me on an errand, I would look for someone younger and send them. Faith caught up to me one day, I sent our neighbours young daughter Tope to go and buy me Lolli (i think thats what it was called), Its sorta coloring and sugar water, frozen in a plastic bag. anyways, the place was down the street, not even 2 mins away... this kid came back, there was only Ice in the bag, all the coloring was gone, Her lips was really red. I was furious..... and I asked her what happened. She said The Sun was melting it, SO she raised it up and it was draining in her mouth till she got home cause she didn't want it to waste. . i wanted to beat her, but her mum came just in time and said serves me right for sending her.


When I was younger, about 8-11 years old.... I would always be super angry, if we got any visitors around dinner time, or anytime we were about to eat... seeing as how, this unplanned visit will affect my ration. That visitor was dead to me... I wouldn't even acknowledge them... unless they gave me money when they were leaving.


When I was younger, my mum would always, start cooking only to leave me to continue... and when she left, I would sneek away to go play football, till when I saw my mum from a mile away coming. I would then run to the kitchen to meet a half burnt food. my brain would be working overtime, so I would pour the good part into another pot, scrape the original pot, then transfer the food back to the original pot .... and pour more water in it, and sit down and pretend as if i was there the entire time. my mum too would come, ask me even though she could smell the burnt food from a mile away.... she would still ask me, did you leave the food unattended, and my response would always be the same. No ma, i was sitting here the entire time, even though there was enough dust around my leg to make it look like i was wearing socks of dust...... she will ignore all the evidence..... and I will assume that I've gotten away with it too. she will even feed my stupidity by giving me food too...... not knowing that my punishment is coming when I go to sleep. she will then wake up around 1 when that sleep is in my bones... she will beat the sleep out of me.... at that time i won't even recall what I did wrong. Imagine ... this was a regular occurrence.
Next morning she would ask me, why did I beat you last night.... I don't even remember, but my response is always "I won't do it again". in my mind, I think it might be because I was snoring

I was sooo troublesome

God in heaven what you are something else bhahahaahhahahhah.

SolexxBarry:
Lol,I remember wen my lil bro was 7,we had a new neighbor,who always comes to visit my mum who was extremely ugly ,we always talk abt her wen shes nt around. So one day she met my lil bro outside and told him to call my mum,my lil bro started shouting, Mummy Dat ur friend u said is ugly is here oooio.

laugh wen kill me die

SapeleWater:
I remember when we dey play ball (monkey post) for street and my mama come say make I dey look after my small sister wey dey about 1 year. As e come reach my set to play, naim I use one basket cover my sister come carry one big stone put on top so dat she no go fit escape.


My mama come back begin cry

you're bad mehn

Amberon:
Lmao This has to be the funniest thing I've heard all my life. Thanks for making the rest of my year.

Lwtmb. I can so relate to this. If u no come die, dem go dey beat you dey cry on top the matter. Good one.

bobkezel:
Just in time. I was playing with my friend's kids (a boy and a girl) as I was about leaving, I told them to let go off me that I had to go. The girl asked me not to go and I replied if she had anything for me so that I will stay, and she said yes. I asked her what was that and she said "toto". I thought maybe my ears were deceiving me so I asked again "what" and she repeated "toto". Holy feck! If you see the kind speed wey I use zoom out from there b4 another ear hear am. I am still trying to convince myself that I heard the wrong word.

Did you inform your friend, the child or children's parent/parents? If you did not, I definitely think you should have found time to talk with the child and helped with better educating her as well as her brother. Or you could have told the parents. You can never educate kids enough from infancy when it comes to sex in this 21st century.

anelen:
i remember when my cousin will shoot me with his toy gun, while am still standing, he will come to me and say uncle pls die na... lolz

LWTMB. I can so relate. If you no con die even afta dem beg u, u go begin chop beating coupled with their tears. Unto say, u gats die fake death 4 dem. Good one though. It made me nostalgic.

Renegadefrank:
Did you inform your friend, the child or children's parent/parents? If you did not, I definitely think you should have found time to talk with the child and helped with better educating her as well as her brother. Or you could have told the parents. You can never educate kids enough from infancy when it comes to sex in this 21st century.

No I didn't, and I don't really want to be involved in it.

bobkezel:

No I didn't, and I don't really want to be involved in it.

Well, lets hope the child/children is/are on the right track when it comes to sex education. Nonetheless, you would be helping a child positively whenever you immediately correct, admonish or teach, as the situation arises. Best regards.

Renegadefrank:
Well, lets hope the child/children is/are on the right track when it comes to sex education. Nonetheless, you would be helping a child positively whenever you immediately correct, admonish or teach, as the situation arises. Best regards.

Well in Nigeria, anybody that hears me discussing that with a kid who is not mine will readily think I am a pedophilia. And u know what follows next. Vum ka mma karịa statement.

bobkezel:

Well in Nigeria, anybody that hears me discussing that with a kid who is not mine will readily think I am a pedophilia. And u know what follows next. Vum ka mma karịa statement.

I know what you mean. Still, I believe that bringing such to the attention of the parents/guardians or even older relatives of the child would help in this situation, as well as clear one's conscience.

Renegadefrank:
I know what you mean. Still, I believe that bringing such to the attention of the parents/guardians or even older relatives of the child would help in this situation, as well as clear one's conscience.

My conscience is clear bro,

bobkezel:
My conscience is clear bro,

Alright, Good to know, bro. Enjoy your day.

My 5 year old was watching Disney Junior this evening. My wife wanted to switch to Zee world. Immediately she asked, where is the remote control. My son quickly picked it up and sat on it saying and pointing to the wall clock "i will give you when the big hand is at 12 and the small hand is at 7". Meaning 7pm.

What?! Come see laughter.

We are waiting to see if he will surrender it. He is about to go to nursery 3 (called reading readiness).