₦airaland Forum

EgunMogaji:
But you do care about my ex marriages. You know why? Because you keep bringing them up like a moth to a flame.

Trust me, any man reading this chat will see your thinly veiled infatuation for me. I've destabilized and shaken you to your very core. You just can't find a place to fit me into. You are totally confused now and I bet you're all sweaty with your hand shaking on the keyboard.

I don't know you from Adam so I don't know or care if you're pro whatever. However I am deeply elated to see that I've wounded you somewhere before and hence why you are lashing out wildly on this thread. I mean you admitted to following me on the threads.

I'm used to it though but sorry I'm taken an I don't do waspish chicks

You haven't used bankruptcy in a few posts please use it more.

EgunMogaji:
I have never made any marriage mistake. My marriage lasted as long as they needed to. You don't get it do you? I am not your typical Nigerian Man, Missy.

EgunMogaji:
Please try to be verbatim, or you are too excited to write long parables at this point?

So what are you wearing?

Sixix:
Are you lonely?

Something tells me that your bed is really cold.

Try being a better man, maybe...just maybe you will find a good woman!

Goodnight!

amokeme:
wow! Wow! Wow! you got to be kidding me! what did I just read?? Oh my goodness, ma( that is if you are a woman which I strongly doubt), you must have been through alot . May God liberate you in Jesus name!
Things are happening g in this life...

@ Kondomatic I think this is your kind of woman.

MarieSucre:
Who does the cooking?

MarieSucre:
Who washes all the clothes?

MarieSucre:
Who tidies the house?

MarieSucre:
Who looks after the children?

MarieSucre:
Wakes up at night once the little one starts crying?

amokeme:
power you mean?

MarieSucre:
I swear to God, I am a woman. Why can't you believe that there are women who believe in maintaining the status quo. There are some Nigerians who believed that Nigeria should still be under Britain. The British might have been racist, imperialist, it was really and unequal dynamic, but Britain was clothed us with an air of power.

MarieSucre:
I swear to God, I am a woman. Why can't you believe that there are women who believe in maintaining the status quo. There are some Nigerians who believed that Nigeria should still be under Britain. The British might have been racist, imperialist, it was really and unequal dynamic, but Britain was clothed us with an air of power.

MarieSucre:
Adaeze003

My dear, as a woman you must submit to your husband, in all things. I tell you from experience. You see even if you had a twin brother, by virtue of him being male, he will grow to be more sensible than you are. It does not matter whether he has made grievous mistakes in the past or he has indulged in rash decisions. once he gets married and he assumes that title "Head of the House" or "Husband", he automatically gets magically imbued common sense.
Now you must understand that your husband is the God you see, throw away all talk of partnership, is there any partnership between God and Man. NO!! God is forever above man, as your husband is forever above you. You must grovel at his feet, contort yourself to the point of elasticity and numb your emotions, because the only feelings that should be your primary concern in that union should be his. You must do everything for him short of worshipping him. You are lucky to be married. Some women are still single and anytime they pass a bustop or junction, people spit at them and throw rotten tomatoes at them. Do you want to be one of those bitter single women?

Listen, any thing that is wrong with any relationship is the woman's fault. She needs to check herself to make sure she does not lose him like a toy to some other woman. Is he cheating on you? Then you must either be dressing like an old woman or not giving him enough blowjobb. Is he beating you? Then you must either be a nag or a stupid housewife who brings no monetary value to the union except maybe do all the housework and take care of both your children. Check yourself. Men are too rational unlike emotional and confused women. Check yourself Nigerian Woman.

Finally. concerning this topic, here are some definitions of what submissive means.

adjective
-Being subjected to an action without producing a reaction.Taking no action.
He remained passive during the protest.(grammar)
-Being in the passive voice.(psychology) -Being inactive andsubmissive in a relationship, especially in a sexual one.
(finance) Not participating in management.
(aviation) Without motive power.

Here is another definition--
Submissive

One who gives over their rights, their desires, and
themselves to another. As a gift.
Of the two, Jane was the most submissive.
by. Anonymous November 02, 2003

submission /səbˈmɪʃ(ə)n/
noun
1. the action of accepting or yielding to a superior force
or to the will or authority of another person.

Some men here will want to wrongly deceive you that there is power in submission. That is a bloody lie. There is no requirement for how he is to reciprocate. Even if the Bible tells you that Husbands should love wives as themselves, you know some women, they will try to take advantage of such love. Don't let her cross boundaries. Plus we as women, what do we even need the power for sef?
We are helpers. If He need sex we give it. Why do we need to stay on top? What else. We start asking our husbands to give us mouth job, cunninlingus? Start demanding that we also have orgasms? That is un-african. There is no power in being submissive. You are a woman. You do not need to have any. Thank God you have a man.

So this is not a case of him getting your opinion, he doesn't bloody need your input. Did David need his previous wife opinion before marrying a new wife? NO! If he wants to bring in the whole village into his house, then he bloody well can. He is the head of the family. Its his house, he paid a lot of money on you, you're his property. You will host his guest, cook and clean after them. If you cannot do that, then he gets another girl to do it simple. /

SirJeffry Estharfabian misreal Strahovski1 kilokeys viktor01
efficiencie Kazrem Irore mamaafrik tietie85 ghostwritter
linusbnn tonero4urch HIGHESTPOPORI AfroKnight Achilles2 engrshakespeare NemzySeries saxomo6 paschu
pbs4real osenidvdg pinkpebbles Sixix bukatyne EgunMogaji EgunMogaji aumeehn ghostwritter

kilokeys:
It's more of a marriage than a patnership

So there has to be a leader somehow.

Even most partnership ain't equal.

If she says no.. Why should the man accept her "no".. Wouldn't that make it still one-sided?

tosyne2much:
You will definitely tell him someone else got under ur skirt?

paschu:
There's nothing wrong in using wisdom and getting a hotel room for the guest.

But what exactky are we saying?

What is the message are we trying to pass across?

The reality is that a married couple WILL NOT ALWAYS be in agreement. So the question is who exactly is RESPONSIBLE for making final decisions in the family? Whose DUTY is it? You cannot tell me it's both the husband and wife. No sane person puts two captains in one ship, and martiage relation-ship is not an exception. God is not an author of confusion. And if He is the author of marriage, we had better stopped adding that silly "but" in our futile attempt to explain away who God says the head is.

Sixix:
Ode!

E no go for better for whoever did this to you

silverr:
Loool. I misunderstood ur last quote.
Y will I cheat in d first place? But even if somehow it happened, I'll have to talk. Its better it comes from me. Nothing can be hidden under d sun.

Clap 4 urself

MarieSucre:
I swear to God, I am a woman. Why can't you believe that there are women who believe in maintaining the status quo. There are some Nigerians who believed that Nigeria should still be under Britain. The British might have been racist, imperialist, it was really and unequal dynamic, but Britain was clothed us with an air of power.

tosyne2much:
Clap 4 urself

MarieSucre:
Adaeze003

My dear, as a woman you must submit to your husband, in all things. I tell you from experience. You see even if you had a twin brother, by virtue of him being male, he will grow to be more sensible than you are. It does not matter whether he has made grievous mistakes in the past or he has indulged in rash decisions. once he gets married and he assumes that title "Head of the House" or "Husband", he automatically gets magically imbued common sense.
Now you must understand that your husband is the God you see, throw away all talk of partnership, is there any partnership between God and Man. NO!! God is forever above man, as your husband is forever above you. You must grovel at his feet, contort yourself to the point of elasticity and numb your emotions, because the only feelings that should be your primary concern in that union should be his. You must do everything for him short of worshipping him. You are lucky to be married. Some women are still single and anytime they pass a bustop or junction, people spit at them and throw rotten tomatoes at them. Do you want to be one of those bitter single women?

Listen, any thing that is wrong with any relationship is the woman's fault. She needs to check herself to make sure she does not lose him like a toy to some other woman. Is he cheating on you? Then you must either be dressing like an old woman or not giving him enough blowjobb. Is he beating you? Then you must either be a nag or a stupid housewife who brings no monetary value to the union except maybe do all the housework and take care of both your children. Check yourself. Men are too rational unlike emotional and confused women. Check yourself Nigerian Woman.

Finally. concerning this topic, here are some definitions of what submissive means.

adjective
-Being subjected to an action without producing a reaction.Taking no action.
He remained passive during the protest.(grammar)
-Being in the passive voice.(psychology) -Being inactive andsubmissive in a relationship, especially in a sexual one.
(finance) Not participating in management.
(aviation) Without motive power.

Here is another definition--
Submissive

One who gives over their rights, their desires, and
themselves to another. As a gift.
Of the two, Jane was the most submissive.
by. Anonymous November 02, 2003

submission /səbˈmɪʃ(ə)n/
noun
1. the action of accepting or yielding to a superior force
or to the will or authority of another person.

Some men here will want to wrongly deceive you that there is power in submission. That is a bloody lie. There is no requirement for how he is to reciprocate. Even if the Bible tells you that Husbands should love wives as themselves, you know some women, they will try to take advantage of such love. Don't let her cross boundaries. Plus we as women, what do we even need the power for sef?
We are helpers. If He need sex we give it. Why do we need to stay on top? What else. We start asking our husbands to give us mouth job, cunninlingus? Start demanding that we also have orgasms? That is un-african. There is no power in being submissive. You are a woman. You do not need to have any. Thank God you have a man.

So this is not a case of him getting your opinion, he doesn't bloody need your input. Did David need his previous wife opinion before marrying a new wife? NO! If he wants to bring in the whole village into his house, then he bloody well can. He is the head of the family. Its his house, he paid a lot of money on you, you're his property. You will host his guest, cook and clean after them. If you cannot do that, then he gets another girl to do it simple. /

SirJeffry Estharfabian misreal Strahovski1 kilokeys viktor01
efficiencie Kazrem Irore mamaafrik tietie85 ghostwritter
linusbnn tonero4urch HIGHESTPOPORI AfroKnight Achilles2 engrshakespeare NemzySeries saxomo6 paschu
pbs4real osenidvdg pinkpebbles Sixix bukatyne EgunMogaji EgunMogaji aumeehn ghostwritter

Adaeze003:
Actually one sensible mention from a guy/man, no insulting word or comment... me likey.

Actually, marriage is a union. I mean, even the whites, as rational as they are know this, why do you think every asset is split down the middle in divorce?

Now, you must understand that no one is sharing "head of house" with man. Also, I don't subscribe to african type marriages where I'll live my whole life stroking a man's ego. Well if you subscribe to it then ignore the rest of the post. But if you're talking Christian type marriage go on...

Now, on the submission issue, you have to agree that men are also to love their wives like their own body/self? And even unto dying for her Do you think it's that feeling of the heart pumping faster when you see her? Do you really think women have the hardest part? Love is synonymous to selflessness and putting her/her needs/wants before yours , overlooking her flaws(even if one of those flaws is not being submissive ), I can go on but I think you get the picture after all bible says "like Christ himself loves the world"!


But hey! What the average Nigerian man wants is slavery, the right to never be questioned by their wives even when they poke other holes, ultimately, they want to be gods of their wives. It might work, but only for sometime even for the insecure women then, there's friction(fact!).

This is the reason marriages are in trouble, men have decided to not see their own part and they hold on to the submission part and carry it on their heads like agege bread.

Complete the equation or let it go completely, if you want submission, love like you're supposed to. That's it! If not, you're in for a whirlwind of a marriage.

Oya where are all them mentioners, read and digest...
Cc EgunMogaji ghostwritter gumeehn linusbnn agu87 SirJeffry engrshakespeare krismart mamaafrik kondomatic...

Seventeen:
These kind of threads always intrests me. I shake my head and smile when i read certain comments cos i know dat most of the nairaland guyz who form hard men with their comments, are d very ones women control. Well nothing wrong in dat sha, we all can play make believe on nairaland, its allowed, but those who are actually married know its no longer as simple as ABC like in our forefathers dayz. In a good marriage where there is love and respect on both sides a man would respect his wife's opinion and wishes and vice versa. Only in a marriage that already has k-leg will a man b willing to quarell with his beloved wife over a friend comin into town for just two days. I have had to deny my sister from coming for hols one certain time my hubby wasnt in a gd mood and dint approve of her coming. I culd hv insisted and had a huge fight that wouldn't hv bn worth it, plus my sis wouldn't hv enjoyed her stay. My husband at certain points in our marriage has also had to gv up certain ideas and requests i dint approve of. Couples should just learn to love and respect each other thats all. More so, saying 'NO' by either party could also b a saving grace, not all 'NO' is said to be sturborn or to control. Some 'NO's have actually saved many families from trouble. Thats not to say that there should be no compromises either.

igivefuck4free:
We all know a wife can't just bring a family, not even a friend, to stay over for few days without consulting the husband first.... Now base on the society we are, as an African, wives are generally submissive to their husbands. So is it appropriate for an husband to bring a friend from another city (or friends from anywhere) who called that he's coming to stay two days in their house to execute a project in their city without first seeking approval from the wife? And if he seeks her approval and the wife says no or not this time, what should he do?

Kondomatic:
You don't expect a bread winner to still come home and be the bread toasterThe maid or washing machineWhoever appreciates a clean environment bears the burden.Both parents but whoever have bigger breasts among them should look after them moreWife and sometimes the husband, it depends on whom the kid is closer to.

tietie85:
If u are expecting a visitor no matter the person,u must first discuss it with ur wife, as a good wife she must not say no, though she might not like it but she doesn't have a choice than to accept

Sixix:
I brought them up to show you what you really are. You sounded pained when you described your experience in the family court.

You wish I am infatuated by you. I don't do baggages and losers.

Sixix:
Very genuine reason? I hope you will accord her the same respect when she has guests?

Sixix:
I brought them up to show you what you really are. You sounded pained when you described your experience in the family court.

You wish I am infatuated by you. I don't do baggages and losers.

misreal:
oh lawd,somebody get me a diamond ring and a diamond suv,i have seen my wife..runs away from thread to tell my mama..



pls marriage is not slavery madam.and not everything is the woman's fault.

Kondomatic:
I hate what I am about to type but I kinda agree with the person you quoted and technically speaking, wives in down here are being bought which places them well below their husbands.

To begin with, a man owns the house, I mean the building they live in, most girls cannot marry a guy who doesn't own a house. The man most times pays the rent if they're staying in a rented apartment which makes it his house not their house so he can bring in whoever he wants to so far the person is not a crook.

Finally, consider what the men pass through, when you see a woman you want to marry, her family will tax you mightily and when you pay everything they asked for and pay a certain amount of bride price, they will hand the girl over to you.(isn't that business?) keep love aside please, this is pure business arrangement, you pay for their daughter before she becomes you wife.

So she was bought and cannot be equal with you.

A lot of things need to change for our women to enjoy certain privileges in their marriage.

There's this outdated mentality of some ladies that "her money is her money but her husbands money is their money" meaning that the pays almost all the bills and yet they clamour for equal rights.

It smells like nonsense.