Burial is a day set apart to say farewell to the remains of a dead person, but people today have turned it to something else. Are people suppose to cook, share souvenirs and wear uniforms during burials? where did this practice emanate from? Why are Nigerians good are emulating bad things? people spend huge sum of money burying a dead person, while the living have nothing to eat. Chai! I pray it stops someday, the practice is sickening.

Depending on the age range

That was just the problem...
You will see people crying their eyes out, within 20mins, every one will be drinking and eating...

The sudden change of mood is still what i cannot figure out till now.....If you came from the part of state where i came from and got an inquisitive mind set, U might be wondering " was it not this woman that was rolling on the floor just now?"

was it not this man that was weeping for the loss of dear friend just now...?

That's why i like the whites kind of funeral.immediately after the funeral service in church, and they have done all the hug and kisses, every one will go back to their homes...Only the immediate family members and few friends will be invited to accompany them to the cemetery,ie if he/she was not cremated...
When those few members were back, they will just serve them tea or coffee and light refreshment like biscuit full stop...Beside that, it was that dead individual that paid for his or her funeral because they have funeral insurance....

VolT0xic:
Are you a sadist?

The Food is for the metabolism of the living.
The souvenirs is for the remembrance of the death.
Uniforms are for easy identification. Or whatever.

hahahaha u don make me weak

my dear op, the burden in my heart about this issue can write a full book of a thousand pages. I lost my dad and uncle last year, and I can categorically explain this issue to u. The greed of people during burials is alarming, even the church is not helping matters. As soon as u tell them about a member's death, the next thing u will hear is "U can come later so that we will Check the register for u". Checking register means to calculate the amount of money the dead person is owning and must be cleared and to tell u what u will serve each group at the burial. This clearance must be done by all the members of the deceased family, failure to do this they will threaten not to bury the person. Do you know in my place they threaten people with "if you don't do this if you die the church won't come and bury u o ". Just imagine!!!

When people die u will hear the family say we use several tens of thousands for clearance.
it's not as if this dead people are strangers, they were their members o in fact of a good financial stand in terms of their dues and levies. But wat I can't understand is where all these new dues and levies jump out from as soon as one dies.

Sometimes, I wonder how judgement day will look like if those who claim to be devoted children of God behave this way.
As for me when my life on earth ends, am not interested in any greedy church burial. I prefer the money used to help the poor who are still alive.

I only pray to make heaven so that from my room's window in heaven I will watch how judgement will be like cos with the level of evil and deception in this world judgement day will sure be very interesting.

your thought is exactly what baffles me, an aunt of mine died and the so-called register was checked and they found out she didn't belong to any group and they vehemently refused to bury her.
It is annoying, very very >:, a neighbor of mine lost her uncle in law and the husband is busy preparing for the burial and lamenting no money.NB the man married and divorced and no one knows her whereabout with his daughter.
Why can't we just bury people just like the Muslims rather than call a large party, is it rice that one hasn't eaten bf?

VolT0xic:
Are you a sadist?

The Food is for the metabolism of the living.
The souvenirs is for the remembrance of the death.
Uniforms are for easy identification. Or whatever.

souvenirs can never be used for remembered a dead person,they will spoil on the long run. Identification u say? is it very very necessary? let's be logical, a dead person isn't gonna come bk.

fav444:
my dear op, the burden in my heart about this issue can write a full book of a thousand pages. I lost my dad and uncle last year, and I can categorically explain this issue to u. The greed of people during burials is alarming, even the church is not helping matters. As soon as u tell them about a member's death, the next thing u will hear is "U can come later so that we will Check the register for u". Checking register means to calculate the amount of money the dead person is owning and must be cleared and to tell u what u will serve each group at the burial. This clearance must be done by all the members of the deceased family, failure to do this they will threaten not to bury the person. Do you know in my place they threaten people with "if you don't do this if you die the church won't come and bury u o ". Just imagine!!!

When people die u will hear the family say we use several tens of thousands for clearance.
it's not as if this dead people are strangers, they were their members o in fact of a good financial stand in terms of their dues and levies. But wat I can't understand is where all these new dues and levies jump out from as soon as one dies.

Sometimes, I wonder how judgement day will look like if those who claim to be devoted children of God behave this way.
As for me when my life on earth ends, am not interested in any greedy church burial. I prefer the money used to help the poor who are still alive.

I only pray to make heaven so that from my room's window in heaven I will watch how judgement will be like cos with the level of evil and deception in this world judgement day will sure be very interesting.

3:48pm
your thought is exactly what baffles me, an aunt of
mine died and the so-called register was checked
and they found out she didn't belong to any group
and they vehemently refused to bury her.
It is annoying, very very >:, a neighbor of mine lost
her uncle in law and the husband is busy preparing
for the burial and lamenting no money.NB the man
married and divorced and no one knows her
whereabout with his daughter.
Why can't we just bury people just like the Muslims
rather than call a large party, is it rice that one
hasn't eaten bf?

I can write a book on this. When we lost a close relative, we were asked to make envelopes(money) available to officiating ministers down to church clerk. It wasn't funny in any way. They also target well to do families and ensure they gather well to handle the service. After the funeral ceremony they are taken to a special place and given all sorts of food. So painful to watch them devour the food and meat with a pocket full of money. I'm still very angry about it.

Eating during burial...hmmm...I'll just say it depends on the perception of individuals. You may attend burial service and decide not to take anything if you're still overwhelmed by the loss of the dead person or if you're not hungry. The relatives of the dead may decide to entertain those that had been with them long enough (for the burials), perhaps to cure their hunger. And if the relatives feel that people are not expected to eat, then they should neither organize party nor cook. No one is going to arrest anyone for that.

And like someone had stated above, it also depends on the age and life fulfillments of the person that died. Some die and people are just happy when they ponder on how glorious their lives were and how fulfilled they were in their endeavors. Does it not call for celebration when people that have lived glorious and fulfilled lives end their journey and pass on to enjoy eternal rest in the presence of our heavenly father?

Richy4:
That was just the problem...
You will see people crying their eyes out, within 20mins, every one will be drinking and eating...

The sudden change of mood is still what i cannot figure out till now.....If you came from the part of state where i came from and got an inquisitive mind set, U might be wondering " was it not this woman that was rolling on the floor just now?"

was it not this man that was weeping for the loss of dear friend just now...?

my Dear I witnessed something similar in a burial I attended recently there was this man that was wailing uncontrollably at d grave site. People practically had to stop him from being buried together with d person that died . Hence I was shocked when at Dat same man was practically dancing his heart out at d deceased place he took over d work of the dj . At times u see people struggling for food and drinks at funerals. It is quite shameful. U begin to wonder if they went to mourn or quench hunger. With d way Nigerians love food I doubt it if majority of people will attend funerals when they know food won't b served.

westerk:
my Dear I witnessed something similar in a burial I attended recently there was this man that was wailing uncontrollably at d grave site. People practically had to stop him from being buried together with d person that died . Hence I was shocked when at Dat same man was practically dancing his heart out at d deceased place he took over d work of the dj . At times u see people struggling for food and drinks at funerals. It is quite shameful. U begin to wonder if they went to mourn or quench hunger. With d way Nigerians love food I doubt it if majority of people will attend funerals when they know food won't b served.

My mum sent me our late uncle's funeral Video because we did not show up...The whole thing was just super touching from the beginning...People were crying etc..

Immediatly he was lowered to the cold earth, and the priest and the choir left, you can't really believe the transformation of that place....The dance..., All kinds of food ....and take away like umbrella, Plates etc.....I was like so this kind of thing is still going on where people eat as if they were in a wedding party....

Nothing wrong in eating at a burial ceremony.

Food offers a lot of comfort for people.

Even oyibo dey chop for their burial, and there's nothing a cup of tea wouldn't solve for them.

What should be addressed is the issue of relatives doing more than their power.

If it's only sandwiches and coffee you can afford to offer your invited guests or puff puff with Zobo, then do that.

There should be no compulsion.

If the dead person's church refuses to bury him/her because he's not paid some dues, then get another person to do the service. Its not compulsory the church does it.

There are pastors who can officiate the service as a personal request and not necessarily representing their own church.

This issue resurrects anger, burial is punishment to the living in this part of the world. I no fit talk Wetin eyes see finish for burial matter.

If you no wan make dem chop for your burial, no chop for other peoples burial....no collect souvenir too. No bi say after you don chop finish sotey and even collect lorry loads of souvenirs join when it gets to your turn your family go dey sing another song.

You no join group for church, your name no dey for register, you no dey come church but when you die you dey expect church members to come bury you. You are on a long thing abeg. Naim be say, church go enter your name postmortem na and you go pay as much as they want depending on the leniency of the treasurer. The MosT painful part be say, this dead peeps had people who would've advised and cajoled them to do the right thing when they were alive, instead their relatives will turn a blind eye will be waiting for whom to lay the blame on. You've got people with town unions scattered in every cities yet they won't join and register. Then when the chips are down and the relatives are asked to register postmortem they will start crying foul. This point shouldn't even be an issue please, every human needs to belong somewhere, don't be an island and then wait for whom to blame. Pay your levies and fines. Do not be a burden to others when you are gone, damnit, that's wickedness.

For this part of Africa, we celebrate birth and death alike...and it has come to stay. After crying and weeping comes the merriment.

When burying someone it is better to cut your cloth according to your size. As Nigerians dey so, even the poorest of the poor knows the cost of the obituary papers, caskets, paraphernalias people uses in burials. Once the obituary papers looks like the handwork of Michelangelo and Picasso then the prices of whatever services that will be rendered will quadrupled.

ubiR:
Burial is a day set apart to say farewell to the remains of a dead person, but people today have turned it to something else. Are people suppose to cook, share souvenirs and wear uniforms during burials? where did this practice emanate from? Why are Nigerians good are emulating bad things? people spend huge sum of money burying a dead person, while the living have nothing to eat. Chai! I pray it stops someday, the practice is sickening.

To prevent double burial. That is burying another on top of the one being burial. You collapse due to hunger things.

What if during the burial 1, belle com turn a guest and eye com turn am join, then you hear fruuuuuuuu gba for ground: that is corpse 2 (by extension burial 2) com shele, cause empty tank or low fuel, how you go do?

You know what I mean

ubiR:
Burial is a day set apart to say farewell to the remains of a dead person, but people today have turned it to something else. Are people suppose to cook, share souvenirs and wear uniforms during burials? where did this practice emanate from? Why are Nigerians good are emulating bad things? people spend huge sum of money burying a dead person, while the living have nothing to eat. Chai! I pray it stops someday, the practice is sickening.

To prevent double burial. That is burying another on top of the one being burial. You collapse due to hunger things.

What if during the burial 1, belle com turn a guest and eye com turn am join, then you hear fruuuuuuuu gba for ground: that is corpse 2 (by extension burial 2) com shele, cause empty tank or low fuel, how you go do?

You know what I mean

I don't eat in burial, no mata d age of d person or how sweet d food is

fav444 you must be from my place lol. You didn't mention the coolers of jollof rice, soup and drinks that will be made available for the church. plus the way the whole villagers will appear just to come and eat mtchewww

Jennifer89:
fav444 you must be from my place lol. You didn't mention the coolers of jollof rice, soup and drinks that will be made available for the church. plus the way the whole villagers will appear just to come and eat mtchewww

I think we are also from the same church

byvan03:
This issue resurrects anger, burial is punishment to the living in this part of the world. I no fit talk Wetin eyes see finish for burial matter.

actually burials/funerals are expensive everywhere. That's why people over here have funeral insurance to take care of their final expenses so it won't be a huge burden to their kids.

I'm thinking about donating my body to science. I hate the idea of being buried anyways. Beneath the earth. Cold and rotting away. Eaten by maggots. Yea that is not for me.

cococandy:
actually burials/funerals are expensive everywhere. That's why people over here have funeral insurance to take care of their final expenses so it won't be a huge burden to their kids.

I'm thinking about donating my body to science. I hate the idea of being buried anyways. Beneath the earth. Cold and rotting away. Eaten by maggots. Yea that is not for me.

Eeehhh!!! To be dismembered? beneath the earth is perfect and cool. So funeral will cost over 5000 usd there? Anything less is cheap.

byvan03:




Eeehhh!!! To be dismembered? beneath the earth is perfect and cool. So funeral will cost over 5000 usd there? Anything less is cheap.

It costs way more than that. Except the person gets subsidized service. As per low income earners and those categories. Even then it's still not cheap. And in some states You still pay yearly rent on your grave site after you're buried. So I heard.

To me, cut and dissected is better than eaten by bugs. Either way the body won't last forever. But with donation I know I'm serving a bigger purpose to mankind. The man that I used his bones to learn anatomy holds a big place in my heart. I know his Facebook page. His family didn't put it down yet. So sometimes I go on his page and look at his photos.
Same as the woman that I used her cadaver to study muscles. I'd love to do same for someone else.

Well now that I think of it, buried people end up as manure to fertilize the earth. Yea so that's a purpose too. Anyway the former is more appealing to me.

I'm also interested in cremation but that's a second option if the first one isn't attainable. i.e if I die very old. I don't think I can donate my body if it's too old and shrunken.

fav444:
my dear op, the burden in my heart about this issue can write a full book of a thousand pages. I lost my dad and uncle last year, and I can categorically explain this issue to u. The greed of people during burials is alarming, even the church is not helping matters. As soon as u tell them about a member's death, the next thing u will hear is "U can come later so that we will Check the register for u". Checking register means to calculate the amount of money the dead person is owning and must be cleared and to tell u what u will serve each group at the burial. This clearance must be done by all the members of the deceased family, failure to do this they will threaten not to bury the person. Do you know in my place they threaten people with "if you don't do this if you die the church won't come and bury u o ". Just imagine!!!

When people die u will hear the family say we use several tens of thousands for clearance.
it's not as if this dead people are strangers, they were their members o in fact of a good financial stand in terms of their dues and levies. But wat I can't understand is where all these new dues and levies jump out from as soon as one dies.

Sometimes, I wonder how judgement day will look like if those who claim to be devoted children of God behave this way.
As for me when my life on earth ends, am not interested in any greedy church burial. I prefer the money used to help the poor who are still alive.

I only pray to make heaven so that from my room's window in heaven I will watch how judgement will be like cos with the level of evil and deception in this world judgement day will sure be very interesting.

my sister you are very right, all what you wrote do happen in my place. The one that pains me most is when i see people fighting for food.

Because nobody wants to die at a funeral. Duh. It's bad luck to the dead.

cococandy:


It costs way more than that. Except the person gets subsidized service. As per low income earners and those categories. Even then it's still not cheap. And in some states You still pay yearly rent on your grave site after you're buried. So I heard.

To me, cut and dissected is better than eaten by bugs. Either way the body won't last forever. But with donation I know I'm serving a bigger purpose to mankind. The man that I used his bones to learn anatomy holds a big place in my heart. I know his Facebook page. His family didn't put it down yet. So sometimes I go on his page and look at his photos.
Same as the woman that I used her cadaver to study muscles. I'd love to do same for someone else.

Well now that I think of it, buried people end up as manure to fertilize the earth. Yea so that's a purpose too. Anyway the former is more appealing to me.

I'm also interested in cremation but that's a second option if the first one isn't attainable. i.e if I die very old. I don't think I can donate my body if it's too old and shrunken.

I really don't see why burial should be expensive. Anyway the dead feels nothing, I have never really thought of what becomes of my body .

fav444:


I think we are also from the same church

Please tell me it is not the Catholic church doing this rubbish?? When I was getting married, they asked that I be a member of the parish (Family was) and Baptismal card.

I don't need to be part of a group and I'd appreciate if everyone not part of my life stayed away. I don't need some people i never knew showing up to show false grief over me. Why should I join part of a group in church if I don't want to? The one that irks me is when people show up at the house to console the family and they are expecting a fantastic meal, that's way before the burial o. As in, my aunt lost her adult son and people were showing up and grumbling that there was "no Malt, just Mineral, not enough food nko" and were laughing merrily and her sisters were there rushing about trying to feed everyone until one sister got pissed and asked publicly "is this a party, should I put on party clothes?" And their shame made people get angry at her for being truthful.

And I truly hate all those grasping relatives that randomly show up, shedding fake tears when you know for a fact that they hated your lost one and hadn't called in years. And why fight over souvenirs?? If you get one, isn't that enough, do you need everything they share??

While extravagance in burial ceremonies is not encouraged, it is traditional that individuals who came from far and near be given, at least drinking water.
Those who do not care about the food actually leave almost immediately after burial.

Depending on the age of the deceased, burial could be a celebration of life well lived.

TheArchangel:
If you no wan make dem chop for your burial, no chop for other peoples burial....no collect souvenir too. No bi say after you don chop finish sotey and even collect lorry loads of souvenirs join when it gets to your turn your family go dey sing another song.

You no join group for church, your name no dey for register, you no dey come church but when you die you dey expect church members to come bury you. You are on a long thing abeg. Naim be say, church go enter your name postmortem na and you go pay as much as they want depending on the leniency of the treasurer. The MosT painful part be say, this dead peeps had people who would've advised and cajoled them to do the right thing when they were alive, instead their relatives will turn a blind eye will be waiting for whom to lay the blame on. You've got people with town unions scattered in every cities yet they won't join and register. Then when the chips are down and the relatives are asked to register postmortem they will start crying foul. This point shouldn't even be an issue please, every human needs to belong somewhere, don't be an island and then wait for whom to blame. Pay your levies and fines. Do not be a burden to others when you are gone, damnit, that's wickedness.

For this part of Africa, we celebrate birth and death alike...and it has come to stay. After crying and weeping comes the merriment.

When burying someone it is better to cut your cloth according to your size. As Nigerians dey so, even the poorest of the poor knows the cost of the obituary papers, caskets, paraphernalias people uses in burials. Once the obituary papers looks like the handwork of Michelangelo and Picasso then the prices of whatever services that will be rendered will quadrupled.

I agree entirely with you.
Orthodox Churches, for example, have established ways of playing their roles during weddings, burials and even child dedication involving their members.

When a man runs away from his responsibilities in the Church, even his social group, when the time of reckoning comes, he must update his status before whatever honour is bestowed on him. This rule applies to everybody.

So it is surprising for somebody to lament having to clear with the Church before is wedding or uncle's burial could hold.
It is norms that keep the society in order.

There is no problem with giving food and drink to sympathisers during a burial. Virtually every society does it.
The issue should be the degree.

cool points! have nothing tangible to say.. so I leave it at this !

ubiR:
Burial is a day set apart to say farewell to the remains of a dead person, but people today have turned it to something else. Are people suppose to cook, share souvenirs and wear uniforms during burials? where did this practice emanate from? Why are Nigerians good are emulating bad things? people spend huge sum of money burying a dead person, while the living have nothing to eat. Chai! I pray it stops someday, the practice is sickening.

HONESTLY, THEY EAT BCOZ THEM NO SEND U.